Monday, August 26, 2019 – Edition: #6517

Another Sheetload of Bull!

 

BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
There will be no “Bull Sheet” on Monday Sept 2, the Labour Day holiday. The Bull Sheet will resume on Tuesday, September 3rd.

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Jesse Pinkman is finally “Breaking Bad” again. After years of rumors, Netflix has announced that Aaron Paul will star in “El Camino”, a new film that will pick up where “Breaking Bad” left off. The movie, out October 11th, will follow the tradition of Breaking Bad seasons picking up exactly where the preceding season ended…fans will remember that Pinkman ended his journey on the show driving away in an El Camino. The film, which is subtitled “A Breaking Bad Movie”, is written and directed by Vince Gilligan, the show’s creator and showrunner. A synopsis of the movie says: “In the wake of his dramatic escape from captivity, Jesse must come to terms with his past in order to forge some kind of future.”
-RollingStone
★ Being part of the MCU helped put Scarlett Johansson at the top of Forbes’ highest-paid actress list for the second year in a row. She has earned a jaw-dropping $56 million in the last 12 months, including earnings from her “Black Widow” solo film and her cut from “Avengers: Endgame”, which totaled $35 million. Sofia Vergara of “Modern Family”, who held the top spot for the last seven years, comes in second with earnings of $44.1 million. Reese Witherspoon, Nicole Kidman and Jennifer Aniston round out the top five.
-MSN
★ The rumors are true: there will indeed be a “Star Wars” spinoff series featuring Obi-Wan Kenobi, and none other than Ewan McGregor will be reprising his role as the iconic character. McGregor made a surprise appearance at the tail-end of a showcase presentation at Disney’s annual fan extravaganza “D23” to make the announcement. The series is still in the earliest stages of development, but we now know that it will air on Disney+, the studio’s new streaming service, which is scheduled to launch in November.
-Arstechnica
★ In the famous words of Lizzie McGuire, this is what dreams are made of! Hilary Duff will again be playing her iconic character for the “Lizzie McGuire” reboot, which she announced on Friday night. She shared her excitement to fans on Instagram, revealing this has been in the works for a while, and writing: “I am beyond excited to be home again, back with my girl…and into her 30’s.” “Lizzie McGuire,” which catapulted Duff into fame, was a fan favorite during its reign from 2001-2004. The reboot will be available for streaming on the new Disney+, which launches in the U.S. on November 12.
-TheBlast
★ “Game of Thrones” star Kit Harington has joined the cast of the upcoming Marvel movie “The Eternals”.  Harington will assume the role of ‘Dane Whitman’, also known as the ‘Black Knight’. He joins an all-star cast that includes Angelina Jolie, Salma Hayek, Richard Madden, Brian Tyree Henry, Kumail Nanjiani, Lauren Ridloff and Don Lee, who star as 35,000-year-old aliens. The Eternals is scheduled for release in Nov. 2020.
-Page Six

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Steve Martorano, BJ the Chicago Kid (R)
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Dakota Johnson, Post Malone, Jon Lovitz, Tyler Childers (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Sofía Vergara, David Cross, Tove Lo (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Wanda Sykes, Jose Antonio Vargas, Jeff Quay (R)
• ” The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): John Legend, Mandy Moore, Hollywood Vampires (R)
• “Conan” (TBS): Henry Winkler
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): June Foster, Colin Macy-O’Toole, Sandy Yawn (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Mark Sanford (R)
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Lucy Lawless, James Pickens Jr., Vern Yip
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Portia de Rossi, Olivia Munn, Shin Lim (R)
• “Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath” (A&E): New two-hour special concludes the series.
• “2019 MTV Video Music Awards” (MTV):  Performers include Taylor Swift, the Jonas Brothers, Lil Nas X, Bad Bunny, Big Sean, A$AP Ferg, J Balvin, Lizzo, Rosalía, Camilla Cabello and Shawn Mendes, and Missy Elliot. Hosted by Sebastian Maniscalco.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Taylor Swift — Scooter Braun has attempted to extend an olive branch to her. Swift was incensed when Braun bought the Big Machine record label, and with it the master recordings of Swift’s first six albums. Braun tweeted in part: “Regardless of what has been said the truth is you don’t make big bets unless you are a believer…Brilliant album with #Lover. Congrats”
• Jonas Brothers – They played Toronto on Friday, but some fans felt cheated when they never returned for an encore. The band later tweeted an apology, saying: “Unfortunately there was an unforeseen technical difficulty and our production team advised we end the show.”
• Missy Elliot — Not only is she being honored with the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award at tonight’s MTV Video Music Awards, she has also dropped her first collection of songs in 14 years. “Iconology” is now available on all streaming platforms.
• Eddie Money – has been diagnosed with stage 4 esophageal cancer. In a clip from his show “Real Money”, he says: “I want people to know that cancer’s come a long way and not everybody dies form cancer…Am I gonna live a long time? Who knows? It’s in God’s hands. But you know what? I’ll take every day I can get.”
• Stone Temple Pilots — are streaming a 1994 live version of ‘Interstate Love Song’ from the upcoming 25th anniversary edition of their second album, “Purple.” It will also feature three unreleased live performances from an acoustic Christmas show, including a version of ‘Christmastime Is Here’ from A Charlie Brown Christmas. The 3CD/1LP “Purple: Super Deluxe Edition” comes out Sept. 13.
• Midland – Their sophomore “Let It Roll” album came out on Friday. Mark Wystrach says that some of the 14 new songs go back to the first time they got together to record demos, while some are “new and written while we’ve been on the road touring.”
• Lauren Alaina – says the main reason that she agreed to compete on Season 28 of “Dancing With the Stars” is that Bobby Bones talked her into it. She jokes that if she is eliminated during the first week, she is “never talking to him again.” Although she says she might be the “worst dancer,” she did previously compete in cheerleading.

I CAN’T BELIEVE IT’S NOT WATER:
Didn’t you say that you like whipped butter? Scientists at Cornell University have whipped up a new low-calorie “butter” that consists almost entirely of…water. A tablespoon of the new spread has only 2.8 grams of fat and 25 calories, while regular butter contains about 11 grams of fat and nearly 100 calories. The new aqua-spread is 80 percent water and 2 percent oil, and is said to have the consistency and “mouthfeel” of regular butter. It was created through a new process to emulsify a large amount of water with minuscule drops of vegetable oil and milk fat to mimic butter, at approximately one-fourth of the calories of real butter and without artificial stabilizers. The next steps before making the new spread available to consumers involve “adjusting for taste” and possibly adding vitamins.
(And making sure this stuff won’t kill people!)
(Sure, regular butter has 11 grams of fat, but every one of them is delicious!)
(I guess we won’t ever again have to worry about eating dry bread…)
-NYPost

BUY CANADIAN:
Although it would seem that U.S. President Donald Trump’s effort to buy Greenland has been thwarted, an American politics professor is suggesting an even better purchase: Canada. Daniel Drezner, a professor at the Tufts School of Law and Diplomacy in Massachusetts, wrote an op-ed in the Washington Post arguing that Canada is a much better investment. Why? According to him, all of the reasons given to justify purchasing Greenland also make sense when it comes to the Great White North, only moreso. Those include Canada’s “strategic value” when it comes to northern shipping lanes and its abundant natural resources. Drezner proposes a purchase price of $20 trillion for Canada, half of which would go to the Crown (Queen of England). Included in the sale would be the following terms:
• A one-for-one exchange of the loonie for the greenback (dollars at par).
• Each of the 13 Canadian provinces and territories would be admitted as a state in the union, with representation in the House and the Senate.
• At the same time, D.C. and Puerto Rico would also attain statehood, bringing the United States to 65 states in total.
One more thing: Drezner’s editorial was written tongue-in-cheek.
(You had me at “dollars at par”!)
(Just when we thought we’d gotten rid of Bieber, THIS happens!)
(I suppose that would shorten the line at the border!)
-CBC

WHO NEEDS A NICKNAME?
With American pro tennis player Tennys (***pron: Tennis***) Sandgren defeating Andy Murray last week in the Winston-Salem Open, it made a lot of people realize, “Hey isn’t it weird that a pro tennis player has the name “Tennys”? Well, it turns out that no, his parents didn’t seek a psychic’s help to foresee his interest in the sport, nor did he change his name to Tennys when he decided to make a career out of the game. Tennys Sangren was named after his Swedish great-grandfather. Here are some other ironically-named athletes:
➠ Scott Speed – F1 and Sprint Cup race car driver.
➠ Sheryl Swoopes – The first woman signed to the newly-formed WNBA, whose name sounds like “nothing but net”.
➠ Mike Quick – NFL wide receiver, whose job is to run away from opponents as fast as he can.
➠ Lindy Ruff – Hard-nosed NHL player, who took more than a few roughing penalties in his career.
➠ Usain Bolt – The fastest man in the world, with a great name to go with his blazing speed.
➠ Layne Beachley – Pro surfer, currently serving as (beach?) Chair of Surfing Australia.
➠ Bob Walk – MLB pitcher who not only issued a few “bases on balls” in his 14 seasons, but he also won a World Series before he “walked” away from the game in 1993.
➠ Grant Balfour – MLB pitcher. He probably granted a few “ball-fours” too.
-BleacherReport, Sportcasting

HOW TO SAVE MONEY ON BACK-TO-SCHOOL SHOPPING:
➢ Make a list:  Assign a budget and stick to it.  (And for God’s sake, DON’T bring the kids along!)
➢ Find sales:  For back-to-school clothes, shop end of summer sales and focus on apparel the kids can wear all year long.  (Whether they like it or not!)
➢ Buy in bulk:  Kids can really go through the essentials like paper, pencils, glue sticks and notebooks quickly.  (And backpacks.  Trust me.)
➢ Do your online homework:  Follow your favorite brands and retailers on social media and sign up for their email newsletters. It’s a great way to stay in the know about the latest and greatest deals. Sometimes they even have exclusive sales for their followers.  (No fair!  7 more days of summer vacation, and I have to do homework?)
-Insauga

DID YOU KNOW?
“Loo”, the British word for toilet, comes from the French “garde a l’eau!” In medieval Europe, people threw the contents of their chamber pots out the window into the street below. In France, the practice was preceded by “garde a l’eau!” (“watch out for the water!”). In England, the phrase was Anglicized, first to “gardy-loo!”, then “loo”, and eventually came to mean the toilet/lavatory itself. The American word for toilet, “john”, is named after John Harington who in 1596 invented an indoor water closet for Queen Elizabeth I.
-DidYouKnow

BS CHRONOMETER 08.26.19

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1957 [62] Rick Hansen, Port Alberni BC, Paralympic games athlete (3 gold medals) /philanthropist/wheelchair marathoner (his “Man in Motion” world tour logged more than 40,000 km through 34 countries on four continents before crossing Canada)

1966 [53] Dan Vickrey, Walnut Creek CA, alt-rock guitarist-vocalist (Counting Crows-‘Mr. Jones’, ‘Accidentally in Love”)

1969 [50] Adrian Young, Long Beach CA, rock drummer (No Doubt-‘Don’t Speak’, ‘Hey Baby’)

1970 [49] Melissa McCarthy, Plainfield IL, movie actress (“Identity Thief”, “Bridesmaids”)/TV actress (“Mike & Molly” 2010-16) COMING UP…”Superintelligence”, 2019

1975 [44] Tyler Connolly, Delta BC, rock singer-guitarist (Theory Of a Deadman-‘Lowlife’, ‘Not Meant to Be’)

1980 [39] Macaulay Culkin, New York City NY, movie actor (“Home Alone”, “Uncle Buck”, “My Girl”)

1980 [39] Chris Pine, LA CA, movie actor (“Wonder Woman”, “Star Trek” films) COMING UP… “Wonder Woman 1984”, 2020

1985 [34] Brian Kelley, Ormond Beach FL, country singer (Florida Georgia Line-‘Simple’, ‘Cruise’)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Dog Appreciation Day”, to encourage support, rescue, and help for dogs in need.

• “Make Your Own Luck Day”, a day to take affirmative action to gain control of your life. Taking responsibility for your own actions … what a concept!

• “Women’s Equality Day”, celebrating the civil rights movement by women that had its formal beginnings in 1848 at the world’s first women’s rights convention, in Seneca Falls NY.

• “National Cherry Popsicle Day”, the kind moms love ’cause the stains DON’T come out!

• “Toilet Paper Day”, What’s the difference between good and bad toilet paper? One is terrible the other is tearable. (Don’t stop me, I’m on a roll!)

COMING UP . . .
[Tues] Banana Lovers Day
[Tues] Kiss Me Day
[Wed] Bow Tie Day
[Wed] Red Wine Day
This Week Is…Drive Sober or Get Pulled Over
This Month Is…National Panini Month

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1996 [23] Electronics giant Philips unveils the 1st ‘Flat TV’, which can be hung on a wall

2018 [01] Playwright and author Neil Simon (The Odd Couple), dies at 91

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2014 [05] Kate Bush makes her stage comeback at London’s Hammersmith Apollo to an ecstatic response from fans at her first live concert in 35 years (a series of 22 shows are completely sold out in less than 15 minutes)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2014 [05] It’s announced that Brazil’s 3G Capital, owners of Burger King Worldwide, is purchasing Canada’s Tim Hortons restaurant chain and merging the two companies to create the 3rd-largest global fast-food company (now fifth)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2013 [06] All 25,000 applicants to the University of Liberia fail their university entrance examination

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ The term “junkie” comes from the fact that recreational heroin users in the early 1900s would collect and sell scrap metal to pay for their heroin.
✓ Babies remain calm twice as long when listening to a song as they do when listening to speech, according to a study.
✓ A reservoir of water 3 times the volume of all the oceans is located deep beneath the Earth’s surface.
✓ Wedding rings are placed on the left ring finger because in ancient times people believed it was the only finger where a vein connected straight to the heart.
✓ The Titanic crew had no binoculars , which may have helped them see the iceberg. They were inside a locker and the key was lost.
✓ An episode of the British kids’ show “Peppa Pig” was banned in Australia because it informed children that spiders “can’t hurt you” in a country plagued with the deadliest creepy-crawlies on Earth.
-WhattheFFacts

BS NOT-GREAT MOVIE SEQUELS:
• Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Behind
• Taken 4: Granted
• Ironing Man
• Flushing Dory
• A Few Good Manbuns
• There’s Nothing About Mary
• RowBoatCop
• Driving Miss Daisy’s Hearse
• Titanic 2: Rose Moves On
• All the President’s Women
-Twitter

Best of BS . . .
BS ODD THINGS TO SAY IN A LOCKER ROOM:
• Can I pop that zit on your back?
• Nice work with the manscaping.
• Does this look like hemorrhoids to you?
• Twister, anyone?
• Can I use your towel?
• Can I borrow some underwear?
• I’m sorry. I thought that was my leg.
• I need everyone to close their eyes while I get undressed.
• I know a doctor who can help you with that…
• Your wife wasn’t lying…
• By the way, they’re real, and they’re spectacular.
–Twitter, first published in ‘BS’ in 2018

BS PHONE STARTER:
What is the most surprising thing that you have ever overheard at a bar?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Any stairway is a stairway to heaven if you’re clumsy enough.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  1-in-5 husbands say they’d rather have their wives do THIS at night than them.
Answer:  Investigate a suspicious noise.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
In prosperity, our friends know us; in adversity we know our friends.