Friday, August 21, 2020 — Edition: #6792

Sheet Happens!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ The zoo featured in “Tiger King” has closed permanently, according to former owner Jeff Lowe. The closure of the G.W. Exotic Animal Park in Oklahoma is “effective immediately,” according to his since-deleted Facebook post. Lowe wrote: “The Tiger King phenomenon has definitely changed our lives in many ways. It has brought us more attention than any human deserves, good and bad.” Although he indicated that the facility will guarantee the long-term care of its animals, a USDA report says that his license was suspended on Monday following an inspection that found multiple violations, including several repeat infractions. The park was previously owned by Joseph Maldonado-Passage, better known as “Joe Exotic,” the eccentric star of the Netflix docuseries.
-MSN
★ Clark Gregg has officially filed for divorce from “Dirty Dancing” star Jennifer Grey after 19 years of marriage. The “Avengers” star filed divorce papers in Los Angeles County on Aug. 13th. The pair were married in July 2001 in a ceremony on Martha’s Vineyard beach after dating for about a year. They are parents to an 18-year-old daughter, Stella. (***See “This Day in Show Biz”, below***)
-Yahoo
★ Legendary comedian Carol Burnett is asking the court to allow her to raise her grandson due to her daughter’s substance abuse issues. She’s asking the court to grant her guardianship of 13-year-old Dylan, the son Burnett’s daughter Erin Hamilton. In court documents, the 87-year-old comedian says, “Erin has suffered from severe substance abuse and addiction issues. In the past 19 years, Erin has been in and out of rehabilitation centers and has been institutionalized a total of eight times for a minimum of 30 days each time.” Dylan’s father has also reportedly checked into rehab.
-TheBlast
★ “Modern Family” stars Sarah Hyland and Ty Burrell will reunite for a new comedy at their old network, ABC. Hyland will star in “Yours, Mine & Paul’s,” a project in development, centering on a woman (Hyland) who agrees to be a surrogate for her best friend Paul and his husband, whom she hates. Paul dies in the first episode. Burrell will serve as an executive producer on the project.
-TheWrap

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Jeff Goldblum, Annie Murphy, Sam Jay (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Lena Waithe, Raleigh Ritchie (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Chris Wallace (R)
• “The Talk” (CBS):Jeremy Sisto, Blanco Brown (R)
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Tracee Ellis Ross, Josh Duhamel, Carson Kressley, Michelle Dockery, Dr. Wendy Bazilian (R)
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Charles Barkley (R)
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Pierce Brosnan, Mickey Sumner, Emmanuel Kelly (R)
• “100 Days Wild” (DISCOVERY): Series premiere. Leaving comfortable lives behind, strangers journey to Alaska to chase their dreams of an off-grid community.

SATURDAY-
• “Backyard Takeover” (HGTV): Series premiere. Landscape designer Jamie Durie helps clients transform neglected and out-of-control outdoor spaces.
• “Secrets in the Basement” (LIFETIME): An unsuspecting couple move into a new suburban house where a mysterious, masked figure lives in the basement.

SUNDAY-
• “Ruthless Realtor” (LIFETIME): Series premiere. After buying their dream home, a happy couple face repeated warnings from a meddling real-estate agent that their lives are in grave danger.
• “Alaskan Bush People” (DISCOVERY): The Browns begin their ambitious cabin build; Bam and Gabe go on a deer hunt as the family scrambles to pull off the mountain wedding, but things take an unexpected turn.
• “The Vow” (HBO): Docuseries examining the NXIVM cult, whose leader was recently convicted on sex trafficking and other charges.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• American Idol — Katy Perry, Lionel Richie and Luke Bryan have all signed on to return for the new season of “American Idol”. Host Ryan Seacrest will be back as well. Auditions will be held remotely. How? ‘Idol Across America’ will visit all 50 states, using custom Zoom technology to allow hopefuls to try out.
• Ariana Grande — will join Lady Gaga to perform on the MTV VMAS, which is taking place at locations across New York City. The pair will perform ‘Rain on Me’, their hit duet from Gaga’s latest album “Chromatica,” which is nominated for seven awards. The VMAs will air live on August 30.
• Mariah Carey – will release her new album “The Rarities” on Oct. 2. The 32-song collection will drop three days after her memoir “The Meaning of Mariah Carey” hits shelves.
• Shakira – just became one of just 15 artists who have surpassed 30 million subscribers on YouTube. Others include: Justin Bieber (56 million), Marshmello (47.7 million), Ed Sheeran (45.3 million), BLACKPINK (44 million) and Eminem (43.9 million).
• James Blunt – says he contracted scurvy while in university after going on a meat-only diet. He ate only chicken and mince for 2 months – after finding himself “surrounded by vegetarians”.
• Bruce Springsteen – his song ‘The Rising’ surged in U.S. downloads on Monday following its prominent usage in the first night of the 2020 Democratic National Convention. The song, released in 2002, sold 1,000 downloads on Aug. 17, up from a negligible sales figure on Aug. 16.
• America – have released the new song ‘Remembering’, which will appear on their upcoming 8-disc box set “Half Century”, out Aug. 28. LYRIC VIDEO: https://tinyurl.com/y56zqot4
• Ozzy Osbourne – says even he has his limits when it comes to tattoos. According to him, he’d never have artwork ”above the collar” because face tattoos look ”dirty”.
• Gabby Barrett – Her song ‘I Hope’ is #1 on the Billboard Hot Country Songs chart for the fifth consecutive week. It reached the top in its 64th week, which is the longest trek to #1 in the chart’s 76-year history.
• Luke Combs – A deluxe version of his 2019 album “What You See Is What You Get” will arrive on Oct. 23. It will include five new songs. The original release debuted at #1 on the all-genre Billboard 200 chart, as well as Billboard’s Top Country Albums chart.

GETTING TECHNICAL:
☞ If you have a difficult time deciding what to watch next, Netflix has a new feature that just may help. They’ve launched the test of a “Shuffle Play” feature that will allow subscribers to stream random titles it thinks you may like based on your viewing history or items saved to playlists. The button, which appears below a user’s profile and on the home screen, is currently being tested worldwide. The company says the shuffle feature could be especially useful for those who are overwhelmed by choice, or simply bored. (If shuffle play is based on my viewing history and playlists, I’ll still just end up watching “The Office” – again!)
☞ If Mike Tyson can come back, why not the BlackBerry? While even hardcore devotees of the physical smartphone keyboard couldn’t be faulted for writing off the possibility of ever seeing a new BlackBerry after TCL announced they had given up on them, it seems there’s still hope. A new joint announcement from BlackBerry, OnwardMobility, and FIH Mobile lays out the plans for a new 5G BlackBerry Android smartphone (with a physical keyboard!) to be brought to market in the first half of 2021. (OK, Boomer!)
-CNN, Comicbook, Crackberry

NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ A man is facing charges after removing social distancing arrows off the floor in a Shoppers Drug Mart pharmacy. In video posted to YouTube, the man can be heard saying: “I’m here to liberate the people,” as he began pulling the directional arrows off the floor with a scraper. After being confronted by store workers, Sandor Ligetfalvy refused to leave and continued with his mission, saying “This is not destruction, this is the anti-destruction.” After finally leaving, he was approached by police and reportedly charged with mischief and defying a mandatory mask bylaw. (I hope they ‘stick’ it to him!)
➢ Residents of a Swiss town got a shock when it started snowing chocolate. The Lindt & Spruengli company has confirmed local reports in Olten that there was a minor defect in the cooling ventilation for the roasted “cocoa nibs” line, which led to it “snowing cocoa”! The nibs, fragments of crushed cocoa beans, are the basis of chocolate. Combined with strong winds, the powder spread around the vicinity of the factory, leaving a fine cocoa dusting. The ventilation system has now been repaired. (OK…Who had “Chocolate Snow” for their 2020 bingo card?)
-Unilad, FreshDaily

DID YOU KNOW?
A paranormal researcher says haunted house reports are on the rise since the beginning of the pandemic. John E.L. Tenney, the former host of TV’s “Ghost Stalkers,” says he used to receive two to five calls a month from people convinced their homes are haunted, but since COVID-19 restrictions started, he gets five to 10 calls a week. Why? According to him, it’s because more people are at home and taking notice of their environment. Tenney says perhaps some people have had a ghost in their house all along and they’ve just never noticed the “pops and creaks” that may be coming from an otherworldly source. (The new paranormal?)
-CBC

BS CHRONOMETER 08.21.20

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1956 [64] Kim Cattrall, Liverpool England [raised in Courtenay BC], TV actress (‘Samantha Jones’ on “Sex and the City” 1998-2004)

1967 [53] Carrie-Anne Moss, Burnaby BC, movie actress (“The Matrix” franchise)

1973 [47] Sergey Brin, Moscow Russia [grew up Adelphi MD], computer wiz (co-founded Google with Larry Page in 1998)/net worth estimated at $66 billion

1979 [41] Kelis (Rogers), New York City NY, pop singer (‘Milkshake’, ‘Bossy’)

1983 [37] Brody Jenner, Los Angeles CA, reality star (“The Hills” 2007-2010, “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” 2007-15)

1986 [34] Usain Bolt, Trelawny Jamaica, retired world’s fastest sprinter (8 Olympic gold medals; 11 World Championship golds)/world 100-meter record (9.58) & 200-meter record (19.19)

1988 [32] Kacey Musgraves, Alba TX, country singer (‘Merry Go ‘Round’, ‘Rainbow’)

1989 [31] Hayden Panettiere, Palisades NY, TV actress (‘Juliette Barnes’ on “Nashville” 2012-18, “Heroes” 2006-09)

SATURDAY- Steve Kroft (“60 Minutes”) is 75; Tori Amos (‘God’) is 57; Ty Burrell (“Modern Family”) is 53; Giada DeLaurentiis (“Giada at Home”) is 50; Paul Doucette (Matchbox Twenty) is 48; Howie Dorough (Backstreet Boys) is 47; Kristen Wiig (“Bridesmaids”) is 47

SUNDAY- Barbara Eden (“I Dream of Jeannie”) is 89; Rick Springfield (‘Jessie’s Girl’) is 71; Shelley Long (“Cheers”) is 71; Jay Mohr (“Jerry Maguire”) is 50; Scott Caan (“Hawaii Five-O”) is 44; Julian Casablancas (The Strokes) is 42; Joanne Froggatt (“Downton Abbey”) is 40

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Men’s Grooming Day”. (What? Once a year? Were you born in a barn?) Participating salons and barbershops today are hosting grooming events for men.

• “Senior Citizens Day”, to recognize and show appreciation for the value and contribution of elders to home, family, and society.  So, make sure you call Grandma and Grandpa today.  Or take them out for dinner…at 4 o’clock!

• “Spumoni Day”, saluting the Italian dessert made from layers of ice cream, whipped cream, candied fruit, and nuts. It is typically made with 3 layers of flavor: Chocolate, Pistachio, Cherry.

• “Poets Day”, poetry is a form of writing that uses the aesthetic and rhythmic qualities of a language, combined with simile and metaphor, to bring out meanings deeper than the mere definition of the words. (And that was a fairly poetic description, don’t you think?)

• “Brazilian Blowout Day”, for those who haven’t tried it, the hair-smoothing process can take it from frizzy and out-of-control to soft and impossibly shiny in just one sitting.

SATURDAY-
• “Eat a Peach Day”, the best way to eat a peach is while standing under a peach tree, immediately after picking it, with the juice running down your arm.
• “Southern Hemisphere Hoodie-Hoo Day”, a time for everyone Down Under to go outdoors at noon and yell ‘Hoodie-Hoo!’ to chase away Winter and make ready for Spring.
• “Tooth Fairy Day”, honoring the tradition of bartering molars for moolah. Where’s it come from? No one knows for sure, but there was a fairy tale in 18th-Century France about a ‘tooth mouse’ who hides under a pillow. The tooth fairy as we now know her didn’t make an appearance until the early 1900s, as a generalized ‘good fairy’ with a professional specialization. So how much is she paying for prime enamel these days?
• “Pecan Torte Day”, Do you know these ‘Pecan Fast Facts’? No peekin’. . .
→ Pecans provide nearly 10 percent of the recommended Daily Value for zinc. If the body does not get enough zinc, it may have difficulty producing testosterone – a key hormone in initiating sexual desire in both men and women.
→ Pecan trees usually range in height from 70 to 100 feet, but some grow as tall as 150 feet or higher.
→ It would take 11,624 pecans, stacked end to end, to reach the top of the Empire State Building.
→ Texas adopted the pecan tree as its state tree in 1919. Texas Governor James Hogg liked pecan trees so much that he asked for one to be planted at his gravesite when he died.
→ Albany, Georgia, which boasts more than 600,000 pecan trees, is the pecan capital of the U.S.  It hosts the annual National Pecan Festival, which includes a race, parade, pecan-cooking contest, and the crowning of the National Pecan Queen.

SUNDAY-
• “Day for the Remembrance of the Slave Trade & Its Abolition”, designated by UNESCO in 1998 as an annual observance to memorialize the transatlantic slave trade.
• “Hug Your Sweetheart Day”, an annual excuse to let your beloved know that he or she is always there in your fondest thoughts. (Gag.)
• “Sponge Cake Day”, celebrating the fat-free dessert that’s based on flour, sugar, and eggs. It has a firm yet well-aerated structure, similar to a sea sponge. (And is no good until it is covered with icing, whip cream, ice cream, or all 3!)
• “Buttered Corn Day”, are you a butter spreader or full cob roller? (Depends on who’s looking?)
• “Ride the Wind Day”, a day to soar above the earth or catch a ride with the breeze. Here are some great ways to enjoy Ride the Wind Day:
-Fly in an airplane
-Fly a kite
-Parachute
-Bungee jump
-Hang glide
-Ride a motorcycle
-Hop in a sailboat
(forget to do up your zipper?)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1987 [33] “Dirty Dancing,” starring Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey, opens in theaters (First film to sell more than a million copies for home video)

2019 [01] Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is named the highest paid actor for a second year in a row, earning $89.4m (Last week, he took the honor for the third year in a row, with $87.5m)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2015 [05] When the Westboro Baptist Church, famous for their anti-gay demonstrations, stage a protest before a Foo Fighters concert in Kansas City, the band responds by driving a truck in front of the demonstrators and “Rickrolling” them by blasting Rick Astley’s ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’

2017 [03] During the historic solar eclipse, Bonnie Tyler sings ‘Total Eclipse of The Heart’ on a cruise ship, while Ozzy Osbourne performs ‘Bark at The Moon’ in Carterville, IL

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
2004 [16] American swimmer Michael Phelps wins his 8th medal of the 2004 Athens Olympics, tying him with Soviet gymnast Aleksandr Dityatin for most medals in a single Olympics (he eventually becomes the most decorated athlete in Olympic history with a total of 28 medals, including 23 golds)

2015 [05] Oldest “message in a bottle” announced: More than 108 years after it was put in the sea by UK Marine Biological Association, it was found on beach in Amrum, Germany

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ “Hello” didn’t become a greeting until the telephone arrived.
✓ Technically, a boulder is a rock that’s 10 inches or more in diameter.
✓ Green olives and black olives are not different species. The distinction reflects whether they were picked before or after ripening.
✓ The higher a plane flies, the less fuel it uses.
✓ X-rays of the Mona Lisa shows that there are at least three different versions underneath.
✓ A typical banana travels 4,000 miles (644km) before being eaten.
-WhattheFFacts, BathroomReadersInstitute

Best of BS . . .
BS THINGS NEVER SAID IN A QUENTIN TARANTINO MOVIE:
• “It’s just a flesh wound.”
• “We can’t include that because it would be historically inaccurate.”
• “I wonder if Tarantino is gonna do a cameo?”
• “Thank God no one got hurt.”
• “We can chit chat anytime! Let’s just enjoy the ride in silence.”
• “Hakuna Matata.”
• “What if we just had a rational conversation with Bill?”
• “We don’t need Samuel L. Jackson.”
• “And they all lived happily ever after.”
• “Frig.”
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019

TODAY’S SLICE OF BS:
➠ Police in South Carolina seized 23 pounds of marijuana from a vehicle. (After an EXTREMELY low-speed chase…)
➠ Adam Levine shaved his head bald. (That or his hair chose to no longer be associated with him. Either way, it’s gone.
➠ As time goes by, humans are becoming less and less empathetic. According to a report, today, we care about others 40% less than people in the 1980s did. (But don’t forget, those are the same people who cared for Ralph Macchio…)
➠ There’s an Australian man who has 203 “Simpsons” characters tattooed on his back, which is a world record. He calls the tattoos a good conversation-starter with “Simpsons” fans. (And a good conversation-ender with women!)
➠ I just read that about 33 in 100 people leave the TV on while having sex. (The other 77 are married and leave the TV on while NOT having sex!)

BS WEB GOODIE:
Skidding into the weekend like:  https://tinyurl.com/y3vztrs8

BS RANDOM JOKE:
If by “clubbing” you mean eating club sandwiches, then yes, I enjoy clubbing.

BS PHONE STARTER:
Describe your ex using a movie title.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  Less than 10% of people have tried THIS on a hamburger. What is it?
Answer:  Pepperoni

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
We’re not here to see through each other — We’re here to see each other through.