Friday, August 13, 2021 — Edition: #7045

Have a Sheety Weekend!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ “Friends” fans had a reason to freak out Tuesday night when a tabloid reported that co-stars Jennifer Aniston and David Schwimmer, who are currently both single, and spoke about having crushes on each other during the show, are dating. But since that report came out, Schwimmer’s reps have denied it, telling a UK news outlet that “there are no truths to the rumors of a romance.” And next, Us Weekly broke its new issue, featuring a story devoted to Aniston’s dating life, saying she is looking outside of the entertainment world for her next beau, because she is “way more impressed by guys who are unaffected and have their heads screwed on straight than the flashy, braggy types who are all over Hollywood.”
-Yahoo
★ The judge overseeing Britney Spears’ conservatorship case isn’t just unpopular with Britney’s fans, she’s being threatened with her life — a scary development that’s now on law enforcement’s radar. The #freebritney crowd’s outrage started bubbling over after Judge Brenda Penny’s ruling last week, when she decided against immediately suspending Jamie Spears from the conservatorship, and denied Britney’s request for an emergency hearing on the matter. Reportedly, scores of death threats against Judge Penny were posted online, with many calling for her to lose her life and “die.”
-TMZ
★ Chet Hanks has two words for anyone worried about catching COVID-19: “Stay inside.” The son of Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson — who became the first celebrities to be stricken with the virus last year — went on an anti-vaccine rant, which he posted to his Instagram. He told followers he won’t be getting a shot because he “never had Covid,” and said those who suffer from the disease should “get over it . . . Why we working around y’all?”
-CNN
★ Dustin Diamond’s presence will be felt over and over and over this weekend — because a NASCAR sponsor is set to unveil a special stock car honoring the late actor. Dan Block, the president of Insurance King, has chosen this Sunday’s NASCAR Cup Series Verizon 200 at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway as the race where he’ll unveil a tribute to his late friend. The #52 car, driven by Josh Bilicki, is wrapped to pay homage to Diamond and his ‘Screech Powers’ character from “Saved by the Bell.” Block and Diamond were close friends, and Diamond starred in several Insurance King commercials. He died in February after battling stage 4 lung cancer.
-TMZ

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Lorde, Taku Hirano (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Gov. Gavin Newsom, Migos (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Giada De Laurentiis, guest co-host Rachel Lindsay (R)
• “The Talk” (CBS): James Brolin, Gina Yashere, guest co-hosts Marcela Valladolid & Akbar Gbajabiamila (R)
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Julianne Moore, Holly Robinson Peete, Meaghan Murphy, guest co-host Ali Wentworth
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Jane Fonda, Toni Breidinger (R)
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Sara Bareilles, Renée Elise Goldsberry, Busy Philipps, Paula Pell, Ariana Madix, Tom Sandoval (R)
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Chelsea Clinton, Danny Seo (R)
• “Secret Celebrity Renovation” (CBS): Jesse Tyler Ferguson travels to tiny Dobbin, Texas, to help renovate a dilapidated family farmhouse belonging to a long-time friend.

SATURDAY-
• “Sealed With a Kiss: Wedding March 6” (HALLMARK): Wedding plans escalate for a celebrity and his fiancée, and Mick gets an enticing opportunity that Olivia won’t let him refuse.
• “Pawn Stars” (HISTORY): Season 19 premiere
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC): Host Adele, with musical guest H.E.R.

SUNDAY-
• “Love Island” (CBS): Season 3 finale
• “Celebrity Family Feud” (ABC): Deon Cole vs. Tisha Campbell and Kevin Smith & Jason Mewes vs. Justin Long
• “Invisible Monsters: Serial Killers in America” (A&E): Series premiere. In the 1970s, Bundy, Gacy and BTK begin claiming victims, while Dahmer and the Green River Killer inch ever closer to realizing their grim fantasies.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Billie Eilish – is one of 3 teens at the top of the Billboard 200 albums chart. The 19-year-old’s “Happier Than Ever” debuts at #1 this week, followed by 17-year-old The Kid LAROI at #2 with “F Love” and 18-year-old Olivia Rodrigo at #3 with “Sour”.
• Justin Bieber and Megan Thee Stallion – lead the nominees list for this year’s MTV Video Music Awards with 7 and 6 nods, respectively. Seven artists have 5 noms each: Billie Eilish, BTS, Doja Cat, Drake, Lil Nas X, Giveon and Olivia Rodrigo. The MTV VMAs are set to air Sept. 12.
• Eminem – His ex-wife, Kim Scott, was hospitalized last month following a suicide attempt, according to multiple reports. Following evaluation, she returned home to recover. Eminem and Scott, who have a daughter together, were married from 1999-2001 and briefly remarried for a few months in 2006.
• Beyoncé – told Harper’s Bazaar about her health struggles as a musician and public figure. Quote: “I’ve …struggled with insomnia from touring for more than half of my life, years of wear and tear on my muscles from dancing in heels.” She also spoke of spending “too much time on diets” and said she used to have the “misconception that self-care meant exercising and being overly conscious of my body.”
• Ann Wilson – The Heart singer has released the new EP “Howlen Live”, featuring 4 songs recorded at her first post-pandemic shows last month in Florida. It includes 2 Heart songs, ‘Crazy on You’ and ‘Barracuda’, the newly released solo song ‘Black Wing’, plus a cover of Queen’s ‘Love of My Life’.
• Billy Idol – will release the new EP “The Roadside”, his first new release in nearly 7 years, on September 17. The lead single ‘Bitter Taste’ premiered Wednesday. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2xmt2weu
• Triumph – will be among the 2021 inductees to the Metal Hall of Fame, along with Stryper, Megadeth guitarist Marty Friedman and legacy members of Kiss and Iron Maiden. The ceremony will happen September 12 via a free world premiere livestream video.
• Stevie Nicks – Citing coronavirus concerns, she has canceled 5 upcoming performances at US music festivals, her only scheduled concerts this year. While the 73-year-old is vaccinated, she says she is being “extremely cautious”. Most of the festivals are moving forward with replacement headliners, including Chris Stapleton at BottleRock in California.
• Kane Brown – continues his run of success with his “Video For Good” nomination for the fan-voted honor at the forthcoming MTV Video Music Awards, for ‘Worldwide Beautiful’. Brown is the lone country artist nominated in this year’s MTV VMAs, which air on Sept. 12.
• Garth Brooks – will be the guest for the Aug. 25 season premiere of Midland’s podcast “Set it Straight: Myths and Legends”. Brooks will discuss his now-legendary appearance at 1996’s Fan Fair in Nashville, which turned into a marathon meet-and-greet with fans.
• Dolly Parton – says she couldn’t be more excited about the release of her first novel “Run, Rose, Run,” cowritten with author James Patterson. Like many of her iconic songs, the story is about breaking free of convention and trauma. It follows Rose, a young woman who moves to Nashville to pursue her dream of making music. The book is available for pre-order now ahead of its March 7 release date.
-NYPost

SHOOTING THE BULL

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Free Guy” (PG-13, Comedy):  A bank teller who discovers he is actually a background player in an open-world video game, decides to become the hero of his own story. (Ryan Reynolds, Jodie Comer)
• “Respect” (PG-13, Biography):  Biopic following the rise of Aretha Franklin’s career from a child singing in her father’s church’s choir to her international superstardom. (Jennifer Hudson, Forest Whitaker)
• “Don’t Breathe 2” (R-Rated, Mystery/Thriller):  The sequel is set in the years following the initial deadly home invasion, where Norman Nordstrom lives in quiet solace until his past sins catch up to him. (Stephen Lang, Brendan Sexton III)

SEARCHING FOR SAVINGS:
Lots of employers are welcoming their workers back to the office these days, but at the same time, many people who have been working remotely for the past 17 month are wishing they could continue working from home. The good news? Some employers are happy to accommodate them. The bad news? It’ll cost you – at least if you work for Google. Google has rolled out a new internal calculator to explain potential pay cuts to employees who choose to continue working from home. Reportedly, those who previously commuted an hour to the company’s offices in Manhattan would see their salaries slashed by 15% if they continue to telecommute. Others with shorter commutes would see their pay cut by 5 or 10%, and those with relatively brief commutes wouldn’t see their wages affected at all. Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn have all warned employees who plan to leave expensive cities like New York and San Francisco to permanently work remotely from further afield, that their pay will be slashed. A Google spokesperson said: “Our compensation packages have always been determined by location, and we always pay at the top of the local market based on where an employee works from.”
(So, if you work for Google, I guess the thing to do is to move somewhere MORE expensive!)
(15% sounds like a lot, but when you consider the fact that you’ll never have to see ‘Jerry the Jerk’ in person again, it’s probably worth it…)
(Well, maybe their commute would be less than an hour if they didn’t use Google Maps!)
-NYPost

NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ A Russian woman is suing McDonald’s over an ad featuring cheeseburgers and chicken nuggets, which she said caused her to break her fast during Lent. Ksenia Ovchinnikova said she was trying to stay away from meat and other animal products during the 6-week period leading up to Easter in 2019. She abstained from eating meat for a month when she saw the enticing McDonald’s advertising banner, and, according to her statement, “I could not help myself. I visited McDonald’s and bought a cheeseburger.” She is asking for $14 (1,000 rubles) as compensation for sustained moral damage. (So, really, all she’s looking for is 10 more cheeseburgers…)
➢ Ontario Provincial Police issued a warning after stopping a driver north of Toronto whose car was piled so high with empty beer cans that he (or she!) was literally unable to use the rear-view mirror. The vehicle was stopped in cottage country during a RIDE check, where officers specifically look for signs that someone was drinking before hitting the road. The signs were certainly there, filling the back of the Toyota from the floor nearly all the way up to the roof, but the driver wasn’t found to be impaired. They were charged for having an “insecure load” and for driving with a licence under suspension. (He wasn’t impaired…but his sightlines were!)
-Yahoo, BlogTO

DID YOU KNOW?
Ikea, famous for the Swedish meatballs served at its stores’ cafeterias, is turning those meatballs that customers love into . . . scented candles. The home goods store is offering meatball-scented candles as a prize in a sweepstakes event for “Ikea Family” loyalty club members to celebrate the 10-year anniversary of the program. 1,925 lucky winners will get to claim one of the Huvudroll meatball candles and let the sweet smell of meatballs waft through their homes. The event runs through August 22. (And the smell will run through your living room for years…)
-CNN

BS CHRONOMETER 08.13.21

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1949 [72] Bobby Clarke, Flin Flon MB, retired NHL player (Philadelphia Flyers captain, 2 Stanley Cups)/hockey executive (Flyers’ GM for 19 seasons, currently Senior Vice President)/Hockey Hall of Fame, 1987

1955 [66] Paul Greengrass, Cheam UK, movie director (“Captain Phillips”, “The Bourne Ultimatum”)

1959 [62] Danny Bonaduce, Broomal PA, TV actor (“The Partridge Family” 1970-74)

1962 [59] John Slattery, Boston MA, TV actor (‘Roger Sterling’ on “Mad Men” 2007-15)/movie actor (“Iron Man 2”, “Captain America: Civil War)

1964 [57] Debi Mazar, New York City NY, TV actress (‘Shauna’ on “Entourage” 2004-11)/movie actress “Empire Records”

1973 [47] Andy Griggs, West Monroe LA, country singer (‘If Heaven’, ‘She’s More’)

1978 [42] Mike Melancon, Mount Laurier QC, country drummer (Emerson Drive-‘Who We Are’, ‘Fall Into Me’)

1982 [38] Sebastian Stan, movie actor (“Captain America” franchise) COMING UP…”355″ (2022)

1984 [36] James Morrison (Catchpole), Rugby UK, pop singer-songwriter-guitarist (‘I Won’t Let You Go’, f/Nelly Furtado-‘Broken Strings’)

SATURDAY- Steve Martin (“Planes, Trains and Automobiles”) is 76; Retired pro basketball player “Magic” Johnson is 62; Marcia Gay Harden (“Code Black”) is 62; Pro football player Tim Tebow is 34; Halle Berry (“Monster’s Ball”) is 55; Mila Kunis (“That ’70s Show”) is 38

SUNDAY- Melinda French Gates (ex-wife of Bill Gates) is 57; Debra Messing (“Will & Grace”) is 53; Ben Affleck (“Argo”) is 49; Joe Jonas (Jonas Brothers) is 32; Jennifer Lawrence (“The Hunger Games”) is 31

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Friday the 13th”, a bad day for those who suffer ‘triskaidekaphobia’ – fear of number 13, or ‘paraskevidekatriaphobia’ — fear of Friday the 13th. Every year has at least 1, but never more than 3.
• “Filet Mignon Day” (French for ‘cute fillet’ or ‘dainty fillet’), celebrating the beef steak cut from the tenderloin. The fillet is considered to be the most tender cut, and the most expensive. Filet is the alternative French spelling of fillet.
• “International Lefthanders Day”, first celebrated in 1976 to salute that forgotten visible minority … lefties. Only about 10% of us are left-handed. If you’re one of them, shake off the oppression and stand up for your lefts! Things that are awkward for lefties … NET: https://tinyurl.com/yya4lxue
• “Prosecco Day”, which is the most popular sparkling wine in the United States, and also the most popular wine in Italy, the country where it originated. Some people compare it to champagne, but it is made with a different type of grape and is made in a different way.
• “Kool-Aid Day”, the annual weekend celebration of the soft drink mix originally made in Hastings, Nebraska. Edwin E. Perkins first marketed the stuff in 1927 in 6 flavors (raspberry, cherry, grape, lemon, orange, and root-beer).

SATURDAY-
• “Navajo Code Talkers Day”, ‘code talkers’, as they became known, used English code words that they translated into their language to send messages during World War II. The Japanese military could hear them, but couldn’t understand them because the Navajo language was not well known. They saved many lives and helped the Allies win the war.
• “Creamsicle Day”, celebrating those ooey-gooey, orange or raspberry-flavored Popsicles with ice cream inside, an invention of Swedish-born entrepreneur Alexander Frehse in 1923.
• “Financial Awareness Day”, a day to add up all your assets and all your debts in order to get a clear picture of where you stand . . . just before declaring bankruptcy.
• “Wiffle Ball Day”, the famous 8-holed plastic ball commonly used in the game was invented by David Mullany in 1953 when he designed a ball that curved easily for his 12-year-old son. It was named when his son and his friends would refer to a strikeout as a “whiff”.
• “Bowling Day”, while it’s possible that bowling style games originated in ancient civilizations, credit for the modern game of bowling goes to Germany. Kegels were placed at the end of an alley and Germans would roll a stone, attempting to knock them down. The motivation was that by knocking down the kegel, a person’s sins would be reconciled.

SUNDAY-
• “Acadian Day”, celebrating the French who settled areas of Canada now called Nova Scotia, New Brunswick, and Prince Edward Island in the early 17th century. Many Acadians were later banished by the British to Louisiana, where the name became contracted to ‘Cajun’.
• “Lemon Meringue Pie Day”, OK, we’re in! Just a small piece this time. NET: http://tinyurl.com/3osh9j9
• “Relaxation Day”, a day to think about and encourage new forms of relaxation. Meditation? Yoga? Beer?
• “I Love Cowboys and Cowgirls Day”, saluting cowpokes everywhere, whether they roam the range or ride the rodeo, pardner.
• “Failures Day”, to encourage the celebration of mistakes. But if you fail on purpose, it is a failure or a success?
• “Check the Chip Day”, a reminder to pet owners to check and update their pets’ microchip registration information.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1997 [24] The first episode of Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s controversial cartoon “South Park” airs

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2011 [10] Before a Sugarland concert, the main stage at the Indiana State Fair in Indianapolis collapses during a hurricane-force wind gust, killing 7 and injuring 45

2014 [07] Celine Dion announces she will not be performing for the indefinite future as she’ll be focusing on taking care of her husband as he recovers from throat cancer surgery (René Angélil would die in 2016)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2008 [13] At the London Olympics, USA swimmer Michael Phelps wins 3 gold medals and becomes the most decorated Olympian of all-time (retires with a total of 28 Olympic medals, 23 gold)

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ Ancient Egyptians slept on pillows made of stone.
✓ Elephants have only 4 teeth, which they can lose and replace up to 6 times.
✓ Marshmallows can be used as alligator bait.
✓ Almost all varieties of breakfast cereals are made of grass.
✓ If you shake a can of mixed nuts, the larger ones will rise to the top.
✓ If you buy a lottery ticket on a Monday, you are 100 times more likely to die before the draw is held on Wednesday, than win the jackpot.
-RandomFactGenerator, BathroomReadersInstitute

Best of BS . . .
BS POINTLESS ACTIVITIES:
• Drinking decaffeinated coffee.
• Taking a shower before swimming.
• Cleaning up after a toddler.
• Arguing politics.
• Smiling at someone while wearing a mask.
• Anything that requires you to put pants on.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2020

BS LEAST POPULAR NEW CAR OPTIONS:
• Rear window fogger.
• Passenger airbag in trunk.
• Drifter in the backseat who says, “Hey, your door is open.”
• Hydraulic roadkill scoop.
• Intermittent steering.
• Pre-filled ashtrays.
• Ceiling fan.
• 37 smelly circus clowns.
-First published in BS in 2009

TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ New York Governor Andrew Cuomo has stepped down after repeat-sexual harassment claims. (Finally, Chris is no longer the Cuomo family’s biggest embarrassment!)
➠ Armin Laschet, the front-runner to succeed German Chancellor Angela Merkel, has apologized for plagiarizing passages in a book he wrote. (When asked if he’s now afraid of losing the election, Laschet said, “The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.”)
➠ The L.A. Lakers have acquired all-stars Russell Westbrook, Carmelo Anthony and Dwight Howard to accompany superstars LeBron James and Anthony Davis. (Westbrook is happy, because he has 4 new teammates to NOT pass to…)
➠ A study claimed that Facebook users are more likely to divorce. (. . . and then way more likely to share every annoying detail of it on Facebook…)
➠ (***Caution***) The average person watches 6 minutes of online porn at a time. (Which brings up an interesting question: What are they doing during those last five minutes and 32 seconds?)

BS WEB GOODIE:
Sliiiiiding into the weekend like:  https://tinyurl.com/4959hnt6

BS RANDOM JOKE:
I bought my kid an elephant for his room. He said “Thanks!” I said “Don’t mention it.”

BS PHONE STARTER:
Age yourself with a clothing brand that was popular when you were in high school.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  It’s estimated that 15% of kids will get THIS before going back to school. What is it?
Answer:  New glasses

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
It takes a long time to grow an old friend.