Friday, December 17, 2021 — Edition: #7131
Our Sheet Don’t Stink!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Fans are showing their love for Jennifer Garner after her ex, Ben Affleck partially blamed their marriage for his drinking habits. Affleck told Howard Stern that he would “probably still” be drinking if he had stayed married to Garner. Shortly after, number of Twitter users blasted Affleck for seemingly “shifting blame” and “throwing Jennifer Garner under the bus even though she was there for him in his lowest moments.” Many pointed out that Garner was photographed driving Affleck to a treatment center 3 years after they announced plans to divorce. One Twitter user wrote: “Jennifer Garner didn’t drive Ben Affleck to drink, she did however drive him to rehab, probably saving his life”, while another asked: “Which step in AA is blame your ex-wife?”
-Yahoo
★ Kanye West says he expects to be “homeless in a year”. In a new interview, the rapper, who recently changed his name to Ye, said that he believes society is being killed by “capitalist rule”, and “It’s time to change that.” Inspired by this, he claims he is going to, quote: “turn all the homes I own into churches”. He also said he is “making” an orphanage. It was recently reported that West is planning to combat homelessness in Los Angeles by using his own companies to help provide education and housing to those in need.
-TheIndependent
★ Jeff Garlin will not return to ABC’s comedy series “The Goldbergs” following a string of misconduct allegations. Two sources say it was a mutual decision that Garlin would not return to his role as dad ‘Murray’ on the show. Garlin had recently addressed allegations against him, acknowledging that an HR investigation into his on-set behavior had been ongoing for the past 3 years and dismissing a rumor that he had been fired from the series. It’s uncertain how the show will explain the absence of one of its central characters.
-Variety
★ The internet is buzzing over Idris Elba, after he helped out a group of troubled clubgoers in their time of need. A TikTok user shared a video with text reading: “Idris Elba speaks to bouncers for us and gets us in the club after rejected entry”. The video shows Elba speaking to a bouncer, and later shows the user going in for a fist bump to thank the actor, and telling him he’s a big fan, to which Elba replies “Hey, no worries man”. In a comment, the user added that Elba “even offered to buy tables as well — proper nice lad”.
-ETCanada
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Reese Witherspoon, Mike Birbiglia, Robert Plant & Alison Krauss
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Jennifer Lawrence, Nathaniel Rateliff & the Night Sweats (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Andy Samberg, Jesse Plemons, Jon Epcar (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Hailee Steinfeld, Lee Pace, Coldplay (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Darlene Love
• “The Talk” (CBS): Anna Kloots
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Method Man, Shaggy
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Michael Bublé, Pentatonix, guest host Howie Mandel
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): “The Masked Singer” winner, Demi Singleton, Saniyya Sidney, Maddie Poppe
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Chelsea Handler, Eitan Bernath, Gillian Lau (R)
• “The 89th Annual Hollywood Christmas Parade” (CW): Featuring character balloons, celebrity-filled cars and musical performances; hosted by Erik Estrada, Laura McKenzie, Dean Cain, Montel Williams and Elizabeth Stanton.
• “Rolling Like Thunder” (SHOWTIME): Stories of myth-like artists, remarkable romances and competitive battles reveal the risk behind freight train and graffiti culture.
SATURDAY-
• “Out of Stock: Supply Chain Crisis” (DSC): Exploring the world’s complex shipping system and how it has broken down, leaving goods stranded at docks and consumers panic-shopping for the holidays.
• “The Christmas House 2: Deck Those Halls” (HALLMARK): Excited for a calm Christmas, Mike unexpectedly gets roped into a Christmas house-decorating reality TV show, against his brother.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC): Host Paul Rudd, with musical guest Charli XCX.
SUNDAY-
• “Christmas Takes Flight” (CBS): A number-crunching CEO buys a family-owned airline and cancels its annual holiday charitable benefit. A pilot rallies the community to save it, and unexpectedly finds herself falling for the magnate in the process.
• “1883” (PAR): Series premiere. The Dutton family embarks on a journey west through the last bastion of untamed America; James arrives in Texas, where he and his family prepare to make their way through The Great Plains in search of a new home and the promise of opportunity.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Travis Scott – His Astroworld stage in Houston is finally being broken down and hauled away after the Nov. 5. Tragedy. Why did it stay up so long? Law enforcement needed everything in place while the investigation continued.
• Ed Sheeran and Elton John – Their ‘Merry Christmas’ has debuted at #4 on Billboard’s Digital Song Sales chart, and at #72 on the Billboard Hot 100. It is John’s 70th career Hot 100 hit.
• The Rolling Stones – are the highest-earning touring act of 2021, according to Pollstar. They only played 12 dates of their rescheduled “No Filter” tour, but still pulled in over $115 million. In second place was Harry Styles, who brought in $86.5 million from 30 sold-out gigs on his “Love On Tour”.
• George Harrison — The 50th anniversary of his “All Things Must Pass “album is being celebrated with a new, cameo-filled video for the late Beatle’s hit ‘My Sweet Lord’. It stars Ringo Starr, Fred Armisen and Mark Hamill, and features musicians Jeff Lynne, Joe Walsh and ‘Weird Al’ Yankovic, Hollywood stars like Darren Criss, Jon Hamm, and Rosanna Arquette, and many more. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2p8b5ws2
• Triumph — has launched the “Triumph Vault”. The new website allows fans to discover artifacts from the band’s career, beginning with a 40th anniversary celebration of the classic 1981 album “Allied Forces”. There is also a selection of newly discovered items personally curated by band members. New collections will be added regularly. LINK: https://triumphvault.com/
• Brad Paisley — will host “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” on Dec. 29. Paisley and DeGeneres are friends, but this will mark his first time hosting the Emmy-winning show. Guests on Paisley’s episode include Cary Elwes and Tori Kelly, plus 11-year-old singer and guitar player Champ Jaxon.
• Morgan Wallen – has been named by Billboard as the top-selling country artist by album sales for 2021. He is followed in the top 5, in order, by Luke Combs, Taylor Swift (!), Chris Stapleton and Carrie Underwood. Numbers 6-10 are Blake Shelton, Kane Brown, Luke Bryan, Jason Aldean & Florida Georgia Line.
• George Jones – “Knives Out” actor Michael Shannon will play the late country music legend in a new Paramount+ show. “George & Tammy” will feature Jessica Chastain (“The Eyes of Tammy Faye”) as fellow country icon Tammy Wynette. Both stars will do their own singing.
SHOOTING THE BULL
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Spider-Man: No Way Home” (PG-13, Action/Adventure): With Spider-Man’s identity now revealed, Peter asks Doctor Strange for help. When a spell goes wrong, dangerous foes from other worlds start to appear. (Benedict Cumberbatch, Zendaya, Marisa Tomei, Tom Holland)
• “Nightmare Alley” (R-Rated, Mystery/Thriller): An ambitious carny with a talent for manipulating people hooks up with a female psychiatrist who is even more dangerous than he is. (Bradley Cooper, Cate Blanchett, Toni Collette, Willem Dafoe)
• “The Lost Daughter” (R-Rated, Drama): A woman’s beach vacation takes a dark turn when she begins to confront the troubles of her past. (Olivia Colman, Jessie Buckley, Dakota Johnson, Ed Harris)
CHEW ON THESE:
⇒ University of Pennsylvania researchers have created a chewing gum laced with a plant-grown protein capable of “trapping” and neutralizing the virus that causes COVID-19. They report the gum can lower viral load in saliva and potentially reduce transmission rates. According to the study leader, “SARS-CoV-2 replicates in the salivary glands, and we know that when someone who is infected sneezes, coughs, or speaks, some of that virus can be expelled and reach others.” The gum neutralizes the virus in the saliva, cutting down on a source of disease transmission. (Yeah, but how does it taste?)
⇒ If you need something to look forward to after the holiday season, Oreo says it will usher in 2022 with not one but 2 new flavors. The new “Toffee Crunch” consists of a toffee-flavored creme blended with sugar crystals to create a crunch, between the signature chocolate wafers. The other new Oreo is a limited-edition flavor that might be perfect for the days leading up to Valentine’s Day. Ultimate Chocolate Oreos have 3 layers of white, milk and dark chocolate crème piled between the traditional chocolate wafers. (You had me at “Toffee”. And at “Crunch”. And at “Ultimate Chocolate”…)
-StudyFinds, Today
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ Two Brazilian politicians decided to settle their differences in the ring. While most political issues are debated in parliament, the mayor of Borba, Simão Peixoto, and former councilman, Erineu Alves Da Silva, went toe-to-toe instead. Da Silva called out Peixoto a few months ago, saying that he wasn’t a fan of his leadership, and in a video posted online, the irate ex-council worker demanded the pair go up against one another. The mayor accepted the challenge, and Sunday, they got into the ring together. Footage shows the 2 throwing some wild punches and kicks, with some clearly hurting one another. After the brutal 3-round fight, the mayor was declared the winner, despite Mirico seeming to have the best of it, leading some in the crowd to claim the match was “fixed”. (At least for a half-hour, their hands weren’t in someone else’s pockets!)
➢ A California woman managed to trade a worthless bobby pin for a house. It took 18 months and 28 trades, but Demi Skipper found a creative route to home ownership via social media. She used Insta, TikTok, Craigslist, Facebook and eBay to put up one item for swapping at a time, trading up for better and better items. After saying in her first video: “I’m trading a bobby pin until I get a house”, she exchanged the bobby pin for costume jewelry earrings. After a few more trades she nabbed an Xbox One, traded up to collector’s sneakers, an old car, then a tiny cabin. Eventually, she scored 3 tractors, and traded them for a Chipotle celebrity card, worth a year of free food and a catered party. She swapped that for a $40,000 trailer. Then, a man who flips houses in Tennessee offered to trade her a cute little clapboard house with pink shutters for the trailer. She and her husband to plan to move in soon. (I saw a picture of the couple. She looks happy. But messy hair…)
-LADBible, Canoe
DID YOU KNOW?
According to Mydoh, an app created to teach kids to save money, the average allowance these days is $7 for kids under 10. The software, developed in conjunction with a division of Royal Bank of Canada called RBC Ventures, shows that the 10-14 age group nets, on average, $10 per week, and teens over 14 get $13 per week. (Money for nothing – good work if you can get it!)
-GlobeandMail
BS CHRONOMETER 12.17.21
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1936 [85] Pope Francis [Jorge Mario Bergoglio], Buenos Aires Argentina, religious leader (266th Pope of the Catholic Church, who took over for Benedict XVI in March 2013)
1945 [76] Ernie Hudson, Benton Harbor MI, movie actor (“Ghostbusters”, “The Crow”)/TV actor (Grace and Frankie” since 2015)
1946 [75] Eugene Levy, Hamilton ON, movie actor (“American Pie” movies)/TV actor (“Schitt’s Creek” 2015-20, “SCTV” 1976-84)
1953 [68] Bill Pullman, Hornell NY, movie actor (“Independence Day”, “Spaceballs”)
1969 [52] Chuck Liddell [“The Iceman”], Santa Barbara CA, MMA fighter (former Ultimate Fighting Champion, career record of 21-8, UFC Hall of Fame 2009)/season 9 competitor on “Dancing With the Stars”
1974 [47] Jeffrey “Duff” Goldman, Detroit MI, pastry chef/TV personality (“Ace of Cakes” 2006-11, “Cake Masters” since 2016)/owner of Charm City Cakes
1974 [47] Giovanni Ribisi, LA CA, movie actor (“Selma”, “Avatar”)/TV actor (“Dads” 2013-14)
1974 [47] Sarah Paulson, Tampa FL, movie actress (“Carol”, “12 Years a Slave”)/TV actress (“American Horror Story” since 2012)
1975 [46] Milla Jovovich, Kiev Ukraine, movie actress (“Resident Evil” films, “The Fifth Element”)
1978 [43] Manny “Pac-Man” Pacquiao, Kibawe Philippines, former pro boxer (the first 8-division world champion)/politician (a Senator of the Philippines since 2016)
SATURDAY- Keith Richards (Rolling Stones) is 78; Steven Spielberg (“Indiana Jones”) is 75; Ray Liotta (“Goodfellas”) is 67; Brad Pitt (“Fight Club”) is 58; Sia (‘Chandelier’) is 46; Randy Houser (‘How Country Feels’) is 46; Katie Holmes (Dawson’s Creek”) is 43; Christina Aguilera (‘Genie In a Bottle’) is 41; Ashley Benson (“Pretty Little Liars”) is 32; Billie Eilish (‘Bad Guy’) is 20
SUNDAY- Jennifer Beals (“Flashdance”) is 58; Criss Angel (“Criss Angel: Mindfreak”) is 54; Tyson Beckford (“Make Me a Supermodel”) is 51; Alyssa Milano (“Who’s the Boss?”) is 49; Jake Gyllenhaal (“Brokeback Mountain”) is 41
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Maple Syrup Day”, the opportunity to enjoy and appreciate this delicious North American treat. Canada makes more than 80% of the world’s supply, most of it in the province of Québec. The state of Vermont is the biggest producer in the USA.
• “Ugly Christmas Sweater Day”, an annual event on the 3rd Friday of December, celebrating the seasonal fad that’s become so commercialized that thrift stores are charging top prices for them. Ugly Christmas sweaters started as a trend in the 1950s, when holiday-themed motifs on sweaters began appearing in ads, then known as “Jingle Bell Sweaters.”
• “Pan American Aviation Day”, celebrates and stimulates interest in aviation in the western hemisphere as a way to develop more rapid communications and cultural development. It is observed on the same day as ‘Wright Brothers Day’. . .
• “Wright Brothers Day”, honoring their flight at Kitty Hawk NC December 17th, 1903. The first sustained motorized aircraft flight travelled a total of 850 ft. Orville Wright was the pilot, winning the honors in a coin toss. Wilbur got to run alongside. (Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two Wrights did make an airplane…)
• “Underdog Day”, saluting the underdogs and the unsung heroes, the ‘Number Twos’ who contribute so much to the ‘Number Ones’ that we always hear about: Sherlock Holmes’ Dr Watson, Captain Kirk’s Mr. Spock, Batman’s Robin, Simon’s Garfunkel, etc.
SATURDAY-
• “Answer the Telephone Like Buddy the Elf Day”. The idea is to answer: “Buddy the Elf, what’s your favorite color?”, a quote from the 2003 Will Ferrell movie “Elf”.
• “Bake Cookies Day”. What’s the best kind of homemade cookie: Chocolate Chip, Oatmeal-Raisin, or Peanut Butter? (And why is it Peanut Butter?)
• “Roast Suckling Pig Day”, “Here [co-host], put this apple in your mouth!”
• “Flake Appreciation Day”, a fun day to encourage us to take notice of snowflakes and to be mesmerized by each one that falls (And keep your “Everybody’s a snowflake these days” jokes to yourself!”)
• “International Migrants Day”, a day of solidarity for migrant workers, on the anniversary of the UN’s 1990 adoption of the International Convention on the Protection of the Rights of All Migrants Workers & Members of Their Families. (Catchy name.)
• “National Twin Day”, celebrates the siblings who enjoy the unique connection because they share a birthday (as well as DNA…).
• “Wear a Plunger on Your Head Day”, We’re not exactly what you are supposed to do to observe this “special” day…
• “Super Saturday”, the last Saturday before Christmas, a major day of revenue for retailers, marking the end of the shopping season that they, and many customers, believe begins on Black Friday.
SUNDAY-
• “Look for an Evergreen Day”, saluting people for whom only a fresh-cut real tree will do for Christmas. For them, the scent of fresh pine helps to capture the feeling of the holidays. (But remember…just because you find one, it doesn’t mean it’s yours!)
• “Oatmeal Muffin Day”, a day to enjoy the cholesterol-lowering benefit of oatmeal in your muffins … then slather on a ton of butter and enjoy!
• “Holly Day”, while the prickly leaves and berries make lovely additions to holiday décor, eating holly is a bad idea. The leaves and berries can cause nausea, diarrhea, vomiting and other issues. Holly is toxic to dogs, cats and horses, and consuming the berries can actually be fatal to children. (Happy Holly-days, here’s a deadly plant for you!)
• “Hard Candy Day”, a celebration of all types of hard candies—everything from lollipops to candy canes to caramels. (If you don’t have one, just ask any older lady carrying a purse. She has at least 30 in there…usually unwrapped!)
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1989 [32] “The Simpsons” debuts on Fox with the episode “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire”
2017 [04] “Star Wars: The Last Jedi” takes more than $450 million worldwide in its opening weekend. It’s the second largest North American opening, grossing $220 million (“Star Wars: The Force Awakens” is first)
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2004 [17] A guitar played by George Harrison while recording The Beatles’ “Revolver” album sells for just shy of $568,000 at a Christie’s auction in NYC
1994 [27] Two musical wedding take place: Bon Jovi’s Richie Sambora marries Heather Locklear, and Celine Dion weds her manager, Rene Angelil
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1900 [121] A prize of 100,000 francs is offered for proven communication with extraterrestrials. Martians were excluded because contacting them was considered too easy.
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2000 [21] San Francisco 49ers wide receiver Terrell Owens sets a new NFL record of 20 catches in a single game in a 17-0 victory over Chicago Bears
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ There are no muscles in your fingers: Their function is controlled by muscles in your palms and arms.
✓ Good news is more likely to be shared through social media than bad news.
✓ Polar bears have black skin.
✓ Even Antarctica has an area code. It’s 672.
✓ The first footprints on the moon will remain there for a million years.
✓ Netflix was conceived after its co-founder racked up $40 in late fees for a VHS rental.
-AllThatIsInteresting, Parade
Best of BS . . .
BS FAKE ‘12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS’ FACTS:
• The Lords were only leaping to get out of the way of the pipers.
• It’s actually now ‘4 texting birds’. No one calls anymore.
• If you see 12 drummers drumming, that’s the fault of a bad public school music teacher who couldn’t convince anyone to pick up a different instrument.
• Partridges are allergic to pears.
• The five golden rings turned my fingers green.
• Singing the song backwards in front of the mirror at midnight will bring forth the Christmas Golem.
• Prince made the turtle doves cry.
• If you give that many birds to your true love, expect to get dumped. Nobody wants that much clean up.
• It was originally ‘The 13 Days of Christmas’, but cutbacks.
• Now that song won’t be stuck in your head.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ Google has made a change to its search engine that makes it harder to find porn. (Which means if you want to find porn on the internet, your search may now take up to 0.8 millionths of a second…)
➠ A survey says you can improve your relationship by going on a road trip. (Just don’t forget to call her every once in a while, and let her know where you are!)
➠ I just read that the average person changes their Facebook relationship status within 20 hours of a breakup. (Amateurs! Taylor Swift has a song on the radio in under 13!)
➠ I just read a study that claimed “Men with big feet tend to cheat more.” (A case study obviously performed completely on NBA players…)
➠ Boxer Manny Pacquiao turns 43 today. (He wanted a piñata, but his family was afraid it might hit back and knock him out…)
BS WEB GOODIE:
How well I’m holding things together: https://tinyurl.com/f8buxxys
BS RANDOM JOKE:
What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What is your worst-ever Christmas shopping fail?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 1/3 of us plan to buy a gift for our pet, but only 13% will buy a gift for THIS person. Who is it?
Answer: A co-worker
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Happiness is an inside job.
