Thursday, November 9, 2023 – Edition: #7593
Good Morning, Sheetheads!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Timbaland has apologized after joking that Justin Timberlake “should have put a muzzle” on Britney Spears during an Oct. 29 interview. When taking a question about the renewed interest toward his Timberlake collab ‘Cry Me a River’ amid the release of Spears’ memoir, Timbaland said, “She goin’ crazy, right? I wanted to call JT, ‘Man, you gotta put a muzzle on that girl.’” After a heavy day of backlash on social media, Timbaland went live on TikTok, saying: “I apologize to the Britney fans and her”. In her autobiography, Spears said she had an abortion while in the relationship with Timberlake.
-Variety
★ The first trailer for the movie adaptation of the “Mean Girls” musical has officially arrived, so “get in loser, we’re going back to Northshore”. The footage not only introduces the new Plastics, it also contains plenty of moments from the original movie — and even an easter egg for the stage production. We also get a look at the performance of ‘Jingle Bell Rock’ — though apparently, it’ll be much more, uh, explicit, this time — along with Tina Fey’s ‘Ms. Norbury’ and Tim Meadows’ ‘Mr. Duvall’ desperately trying to maintain order at Northshore. Jon Hamm also appears as Coach Carr, who is once again preaching abstinence — at least until Spring. Mean Girls will hit theaters on January 12. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mtew9f9h
-TheWrap
★ It sounds like “The Big Bang Theory” universe’s next expansion is still light years away. Warner Bros. Discovery confirmed on April 12 that exec producer Chuck Lorre was developing a new comedy series “derived from” the CBS mega-hit. Beyond it being earmarked for Max, no further details were disclosed. Then, the Writers Guild of America went on strike, which put any further development on hold until Sept. 27. Now, Lorre says the spinoff is “prenatal.” Quote: “You don’t talk about the birth until the second trimester, I believe, is the rule. That’s a long way of saying no, I’ve got nothing to say about it other than it’s something that we are discussing.”
-TVLine
★ Gwyneth Paltrow could be persuaded to act again… but only if the right person calls. The Goop founder revealed to “Entertainment Tonight” that despite being preoccupied as CEO of her lifestyle brand, her “Iron Man” co-star Robert Downey Jr. could convince her to get back on camera. Quote: “It would be very hard for me to do any acting right at the moment, just because of my job. But, I guess Robert Downey Jr. could probably always get me back.” She added, laughing: “You know, to some degree.”
-EW
★ Jeremy Renner is giving fans another glimpse inside his healing journey. Ten months after his snowplow accident, the “Hawkeye” star wrote on Instagram: “I have been exploring EVERY type of therapy since Jan. 14th. Everyday, countless hours of physical therapy, peptide injections, iv drips and pushes, stem cell and exosomes, red light / IR therapy, hyperbaric chamber 2.0 atmospheres, cold plunge, and the list goes on and on….” But the thing that helped him the most? He wrote: “My greatest therapy has been my mind and the will to be here and push to recover and be better…. Be exceptional…” He closed with a thank-you to “all who have empowered” him to endure, and the hashtag #loveandtitanium.”
-E!
★ Andy Cohen is asking CNN to allow him and others to drink during its New Year’s Eve Broadcast. A year after the network decided to reduce alcohol consumption during the annual broadcast, E! News asked the co-host of the festivities about his game plan for sneaking in alcohol this year. His answer: “Hopefully, I will not be sneaking it. I haven’t heard anything yet, but come on, they need to let us drink. It’s New Year’s Eve.” Cohen also said that viewers were unhappy about the mandate last year, and he hopes that CNN “gives the people what they want.” Advocating for himself and his co-host Anderson Cooper, he quipped, “Give the daddies some juice.” (It’s not like it stopped him last year!)
-E!
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” (ABC/Global): Daniel Ricciardo, Lauren Daigle
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): AJR
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Former Rep. Adam Kinzinger, Willie Nelson
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Hilary Duff, Ben Marshall, John Higgins & Martin Herlihy
• “The Daily Show” (COM): Guest Host Sarah Silverman
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): John Legend
• “The Talk” (CBS): Annie Särnblad
• “Live with Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Chelsea Handler, Joan Baez
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Neil DeGrasse Tyson, Bernie Taupin, Alanis Morissette
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Geri Halliwell-Horner
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): John Stamos
• “The Golden Bachelor” (ABC): Followed by a new “Bachelor in Paradise”
• “Big Brother” (CBS): Live. A houseguest is evicted and interviewed; remaining houseguests compete for power in the next head of household.
“After the First 48” (A&E): When a mother of 4 is shot just blocks from her home, detectives look to her loved ones to identify her killer.
• “Murder Runs in the Family” (LMN): When a woman’s adoptive mother dies under mysterious circumstances, she begins to question her family’s potential involvement.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Taylor Swift – Swiftmania continues. Songs from “1989 (Taylor’s Version)” took 7 of the Top 10 slots on Billboard‘s Hot 100 in the album’s first week of release. Combined with the “Lover” hit ‘Cruel Summer’, Swift took 8 of the Top 10 on this week’s chart. ‘Is It Over Now?’ dethroned Cruel Summer at #1.
• The Weeknd — has postponed the Australia and New Zealand leg of his “After Hours Til Dawn Tour.” An email to ticket buyers says: “Due to unforeseen circumstances” the dates must be rescheduled, and new dates “will be announced next year.” He was scheduled to play 11 shows in Brisbane, Sydney Melbourne and Auckland, starting Nov. 20.
• Bruce Springsteen — returned to the stage Monday after laying low for several months after postponing his world tour due to a battle with a peptic ulcer disease. He was in fine form at the Lincoln Center for the Performing Arts, where he played a few tunes at the Stand Up For Heroes benefit show. It was also reported that between songs, the Boss served up some “ribald, double-entendre jokes”.
• Bon Jovi – As the band’s 40th anniversary approaches, Richie Sambora is talking about a reunion again. He told People that there is a documentary coming about the band, “and people want to come see us play. It’s going to make everybody happy.” Quote: It’s just a question of when everybody’s ready to go do it…It’s time to do it, though.”
• Hootie and the Blowfish – Darius Rucker and Co. have announced they’ll get together for the first time in 5 years next summer, with Collective Soul and Edwin McCain for 42 shows in the US, and a lone Canadian date, Sept. 9, in Toronto. LINK: https://www.instagram.com/p/CzTqTlYO8lU/
• Kenny Chesney — has announced with 18 full-scale stadium shows as part of the “Sun Goes Down 2024 Tour”. It kicks off April 20 in Tampa FL, running through Aug. 23 in Foxboro MA. Also on the bill are the Zac Brown Band, Megan Moroney and Uncle Kracker. Tickets go on-sale Nov. 17. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yy8cdvar
• Gabby Barrett — has shared that her second album “Chapter & Verse” will arrive Feb. 2. She posted the details alongside a blurred-out photo of the album cover, writing: “Chapter & Verse New album out 2.2.24 [white heart emoji]” Lead single ‘Glory Days’ is currently at #30 and rising. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/4epzxkmt
SHOOTING THE BULL
O CHRISTMAS TREES . . .
Apparently, one Christmas tree just isn’t enough anymore. That’s the word from interior designer Jen Derry, the CEO of Balsam Hill. She says that while we’ve seen examples of what she calls “over the top” holiday decorating become more and more common outside in recent years, well, that trend is moving indoors. She feels that the days of having just one boring old Christmas tree in the living room decorated in cheap lights with a gold star or angel on the top – are gone. Her company is seeing a number of people putting up multiple trees around their homes, in order “to feel the Christmas spirit throughout the whole house.” She also reports a lot of themed trees these days, with “meticulously curated ornaments serving as a focal point for other decorations.” And don’t forget the kids. Some parents are setting up smaller trees in their children’s rooms, sometimes decorated in the theme of their favorite Christmas movie or superhero.
(I just saw Christmas trees advertised for 75 bucks apiece. Guess what? One IS enough!)
(Weird idea. But I do appreciate the fact that having multiple trees creates even MORE room for presents…)
-NYPost
TECH TALK:
❑ They’re always coming up with new features for smart watches, and the 2024 version of the Apple Watch could be a game changer for your health. Reportedly, the newest series of the device will have 3 additional sensors: One that can alert wearers if they are pre-diabetic, one to sense rising blood pressure, and one that can detect sleep disturbances that could mean sleep apnea. Apple is reportedly also creating a digital health coaching service that will create personalized workout and eating plans. (As if it doesn’t already boss me around enough…!)
❑ A study has found that one-third of people around the world may be at a high risk for smartphone addiction, with women and people in parts of Asia most likely to report problematic use. The study, by researchers at University of Toronto, McGIll and Harvard, asked more than 50,000 people, between 18-90 years of age, from 195 countries, to gauge how problematic their smartphone use is. The study found that women generally reported higher problematic smartphone use than men. And problematic smartphone use tends to decline with age. (Especially after 110!)
-NYPost, CTV
TO HAVE AND TO HOLD, TO SKIMP AND TO SAVE:
A savvy, if stingy couple who say they didn’t want to spend too much money “for just one day” say they organized their entire wedding for less than £3,000 (US$3,600). 25-year-old Lauren Vickery-Young and Connor Young, who is 33, both of Southampton England, say they both grew up working-class, and understand “the true value of money, so they planned things accordingly. Among the steps they took to plan an inexpensive-but-memorable day:
• She bought her dress at a thrift shop for £200 ($246), he used a suit he already had.
• They tied the knot on September 23 and had the ceremony at their local registry office — and the reception at a cocktail bar – costing £1,350 ($1660).
• They made the wedding invites and decorations themselves, and sought out bargains for the big day.
• They asked friends and family to take pictures on their phones, skipping a pro photographer.
• All these steps resulted in a fine looking, discount wedding with a total tab of £2,721 ($3345).
Stats show the average cost of a wedding in the UK is over £18,400 ($22,600), so the couple potentially saved over £15,000 ($18,440). The pair say they felt even more at ease with their choices after Lauren read some horror stories on Facebook, including DJs cancelling and photographers losing memory cards.
(They plan to take all that money they saved and throw a HUGE PARTY! Wait…what?)
(It sounds great, but I just wonder if they ever split, if they’ll both still be as uninterested in money during the divorce…!)
-SWNS
FUNNIEST TWEETS OF THE WEEK FROM WOMEN:
⇒ I sure have a lot of opinions about cooking shows for someone who’s eating a paw patrol string cheese for breakfast – meghan
⇒ Moms be like, “Your cousin’s neighbor’s husband’s aunt died. Just thought you should know.” — Jessie
⇒ My neighbors had their entire house decorated for Christmas by the time I got home from work tonight so I have to move – mean things I say to myself
⇒ I have to move my car and parallel park it into a spot opposite some workmen and honestly I would rather drive it directly into the sea – Mollie Goodfellow
⇒ i love when people are able to introduce me to their grandparents using their insane made-up name in a 100% serious tone: “this is peeps and lolly.” – Emily
⇒ I’m “remembers when a 32-in TV weighed 450lbs” yrs. old. – Linda
⇒ Every healthy marriage requires compromise. I want to decorate for the holidays this weekend and my husband wants to decorate after Thanksgiving so we compromised and are decorating this Saturday. – sixfootcandy
⇒ bill nye’s full name is william new years eve – Kim
⇒ Some random lady took down our outside decorations because “Halloween is over,” and now I want to invite her inside because Dinner is over, and I don’t want to clean up from dinner any more than I wanted to clean up after Halloween. – Krista Pacion
⇒ When someone asks me why I’m leaving the party early, I say “I’m late for an appointment with my pajamas.” – Lindsay
-HuffPost
DID YOU KNOW?
The Canadian government paid a consultancy firm $670,000 to provide advice on . . . how to save money on consultants. The new details, which were tabled in parliament, show the Department of Natural Resources approved the expenditure to KPMG, a global professional services company, to “provide managing consulting service”, including developing “recommendations…to ensure that Canadians’ tax dollars are being used efficiently…” Treasury board President Anita Anand is currently leading a government effort to save about $15 billion. (I have an idea on where they could start…!)
-GlobeandMail
BS CHRONOMETER 11.09.23
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY:
• “Chaos Never Dies Day”, the one day of the year to acknowledge that chaos is essential to a harmonious universe (and if you don’t believe that chaos never dies, visit a daycare center sometime!)
• “Go to an Art Museum Day”, a day to enjoy wonderful sculptures and beautiful paintings. Many art museums have days when admission reduced or free, so if you’ve never been to one … try it!
• “World Freedom Day”, begun in 2001 to commemorate the 1989 fall of the Berlin Wall and the end of Communist rule in Central and Eastern Europe. One year later, Germany became a single territory again.
• “Carl Sagan Day”, on the renowned astronomer and scientist’s birth date (1934). No other person has ever been able to reach and teach so many non-scientists in such a meaningful way.
• “National Scrapple Day”. Similar in both composition and taste to British white pudding, its name comes from the fact that it is composed of “scraps” of pork combined with cornmeal and spices. The mixture is formed into a mostly solid loaf, and then it is sliced and pan-fried before serving.
• “Greek Yogurt Day”. Also known as strained yogurt, yogurt cheese, sack yogurt, or kerned yogurt, it is yogurt that has been strained to remove most of its whey, resulting in a thicker consistency than normal yogurt, while still preserving the distinctive sour taste. (Basically, it’s the kind that kids won’t eat!)
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Fri] Area Code Day
[Fri] Accounting Day
[Sat] Remembrance Day/Veterans Day
[Sun] Pizza With the Works Except Anchovies Day
This Week is…Drowsy Driving Prevention Week
This Month is…Movember
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1951 [72] Lou Ferrigno, Brooklyn NY, TV actor (“The Incredible Hulk” 1977-1982, “The King of Queens” 2000-07)/movie actor (“I Love You, Man”)/bodybuilder (“Mr. America”)
1955 [58] Ryan Murphy, Indianapolis IN, TV producer (“Dahmer – Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story”, “American Horror Story” since 2011, “Glee” 2009-15)
1970 [53] Chris Jericho (Irvine), Manhasset NY, pro wrestler (6-time WWF/WWE world champion)/rock singer (Fozzy-‘Lights Go Out’, ‘Judas’)
1972 [51] Eric Dane, San Francisco CA, TV actor (“Euphoria” since 2019, “Grey’s Anatomy” 2006-12)/movie actor (“X-Men: The Last Stand”, “Burlesque”) COMING UP… untitled 4th “Bad Boys” film, 2024
1973 [50] Nick Lachey, Harlan KY, former boy-band singer (98 Degrees-‘I Do [Cherish You]’)/TV personality (“The Sing-Off” 2009-14, “Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica” 2003-05)/married to Vanessa Lachey since 2011
1978 [45] Sisqó (Mark Andrews), Baltimore MD, hip-hop singer (‘Thong Song’, ‘Incomplete’, Dru Hill-‘How Deep is Your Love’ ft. Redman)
1980 [43] Vanessa Lachey, Angeles City Philippines, TV actress (“Dads” 2013-2014, “NCIS: Hawaiʻi” since 2021/TV host (“Love is Blind” since 2020)/married to Nick Lachey since 2011
1988 [35] Nikki Blonsky, Great Neck NY, movie actress (“Hairspray”)
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2001 [22] The 3,400-seat, $94-million Kodak Theatre, designed to be the permanent home of the Academy Awards, opens in Hollywood (now known as the Dolby Theatre)
2019 [04] The last segment of “Coach’s Corner” with Don Cherry and Ron MacLean airs on “Hockey Night in Canada” after 37 years. Cherry is fired 2 days later
2021 [02] Paul Rudd is named People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2004 [19] Kenny Chesney is the big winner at the Country Music Association Awards. Chesney, who had never won a CMA award, scores both the ‘Entertainer of the Year’ and ‘Album of the Year’ trophies (The latter for “No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problems”)
2014 [09] One Direction are the big winners at the 2014 MTV Europe Music Awards, picking up 3 awards, including ‘Best Pop Act’
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2004 [19] Roger Clemens of the Houston Astros wins a record 7th Cy Young Award as his league’s best pitcher
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ Breathing in helium before playing the clarinet will raise its pitch.
✓ Quotation marks are the youngest punctuation in the English language; they’ve only been around for about 300 years.
✓ In Thailand, it is customary to GIVE presents on your birthday.
✓ Children grow faster in the springtime.
✓ On average, there are 178 sesame seeds on each McDonald’s Big Mac bun.
✓ Tigers can be taught to use litter boxes. (BIG litter boxes…)
-CarnegieMellon, BathroomReadersInstitute
Best of BS:
BS WAYS YOUR LAST RELATIONSHIP RESEMBLED A SLASHER FILM:
• The budget wasn’t very big — and that’s why most of it took place in the basement.
• There was some sex, but, honestly, not as much as you were expecting.
• Your friends tried to warn you, but you didn’t listen and they mysteriously disappeared halfway through.
• That scenic drive through the middle of nowhere seemed like a good idea until the car broke down.
• At some point one of you said, “Why is this happening to us?”
• There’s probably going to be a sequel and it’s going to be the exact same thing, but hopefully this time they cast hotter people.
-First published in BS in 2016
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ Marijuana-based dating sites are growing in popularity. (They have an amazing success rate, too. That’s right, 100% of the couples wind up walking down the aisle . . . of Taco Bell . . . at 4am!)
➠ One in 5 women dreams their man is cheating on them. (Or, in other words . . . Tiger Woods: Making women’s dreams come true since 2005!)
➠ Mary Hart turned 73 yesterday. (Friends threw her a surprise party, but nobody could tell if it worked — because that’s how she always looks.)
➠ A study shows being tortured changes the way you feel pain forever. (It’s true. Just ask anyone who’s attempted to sit through a Dallas Cowboys game…!)
➠ Apparently, there’s a glow-in-the-dark ice cream. (It’s perfect for those nights when I want a snack . . . but I’m too lazy to even turn on the light!)
BS WEB GOODIE:
Baseball on the brain (sound up): https://tinyurl.com/3bdhw4t5
BS RANDOM JOKE:
The early worm gets the bird.
BS PHONE STARTER:
If you were given one thousand acres of land that you didn’t need to pay taxes on, but couldn’t sell, what would you do with it?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: In a survey, 35% of people said they would not return to a restaurant because of THIS. What is it?
Answer: The rest room soap dispenser was empty
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Never apologize for showing your feelings. When you do, you are apologizing for the truth.
