Friday, January 14, 2011        Edition: #4425
You’re Up to Your Eyeballs in Sheet!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
“Jersey Shore” star ‘Snooki’ Polizzi says she’s tired of her nickname and wants to go back to being called Nicole (that’s about as likely as getting your virginity back, hon’) . . . In other reality TV news, the Kardashian sisters (Kim, Khloe, Kourtney) are set to debut a new clothing line for Sears called – of course – ‘The Kardashian Kollection’ (the name ‘KKK’ was already taken) . . . “The Big Bang Theory” (CBS) has been renewed for another 3 seasons in a deal reportedly worth $260 million (making Jim Parsons the richest geeks since Mark Zuckerberg) . . . “Us Weekly” is reporting actor Jake Gyllenhaal broke up with country star Taylor Swift just before New Year’s – over the phone (how to man-up, dude) . . . 43-year-old actress Nicole Kidman has admitted in a German magazine that she used Botox but claims she didn’t like it so she stopped (uh, can you unring a bell?) . . . Kelsey Grammar’s divorce from estranged wife Camille was already pretty messy, but now she’s implying he has a thing for cross-dressing (can you picture ‘Frasier’ in a pencil skirt?) . . . And after appearing on “Dr Phil” this week, 53-year-old Ted Williams, that homeless guy with the golden radio voice, has reportedly been convinced to enter rehab to get treatment for drug & alcohol abuse (wow, his 15 minutes only lasted 7).

WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “George Stroumboulopoulos Tonight” (CBC) – Tonight MIA (“Maya”); Zeus (“Say Us”).
• “Golden Globe Awards” (NBC/CTV) – Sunday the 68th Hollywood Foreign Press Association honors are led by “The King’s Speech” for movies (7 nominations), and “Glee” for TV (5). Ricky Gervais hosts.
NET: http://www.goldenglobes.org
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Lloyd Banks (“Hunger For More 2”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Two Door Cinema Club (“London 2010”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni) – Tonight Wintersleep (“New Inheritors”).
• “Miss America Pageant” (ABC) – Saturday the 90th edition airs live from Planet Hollywood Resort in Las Vegas and features no less than 7 judges, including country singer Mark Wills, “The View” co-host Joy Behar, “Desperate Housewives” creator Marc Cherry, and ballroom dancer Tony Dovolani.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Host Gwyneth Paltrow (“Country Strong”); musical guest Cee-Lo Green (“The Lady Killer”). They perform a cleaned-up duet of Cee-Lo’s “F— You”.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – Tonight Randy Rogers Band (“Randy Rogers Band”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• George Strait – Tonight his co-headlining tour with Reba McEntire starts up again in Austin TX. Lee Ann Womack returns as opening act.
• Justin Bieber – He’s said to be reading the self-help manual “Rich Dad, Poor Dad” while aboard his tour bus … because Will Smith told him to.
• Kid Rock – Saturday he kicks off his “Born Free Tour 2011” by celebrating his 40th birthday (Monday) with a massive show at Detroit’s Ford Field. Jamey Johnson opens all tour dates.
• Rascal Flatts – Tonight they relaunch their “Nothing Like This” tour in Sioux Falls SD. This leg includes 21 shows and features opening acts Luke Bryan and Chris Young.
• Sara Evans – Tonight  in Nashville she sings at the inauguration concert for new Tennessee governor Bill Haslam. Diamond Rio and Bo Bice are also performing.
• Sugarland – Jennifer Nettles is going solo … for one show anyway. Saturday she performs a charity concert in Denton TX to benefit a non-profit performing arts organization.
• Tony Bennett – He’s confirmed he’s been in contact with troubled British singer Amy Winehouse and they’re hoping to head into the studio to record a duet together.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “The Dilemma” ( PG-13 Comedy ): Vince Vaughn plays a guy struggling to decide whether or not to tell his best friend (Kevin James) that his wife (Winona Ryder) is having an affair. Directed by Ron Howard. Co-stars Channing Tatum, Jennifer Connelly, Queen Latifah. Shot in Chicago IL.
NET: http://www.thedilemmamovie.com/
• “The Green Hornet” ( PG-13 Crime Thriller ): Seth Rogen as a superhero? No – seriously … sort of. He plays a newspaper publisher by day and masked crime-fighter by night who is assisted by his martial arts expert sidekick ‘Kato’ (Jay Chou). Co-stars Cameron Diaz, Christoph Waltz.
NET: http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/thegreenhornet/

COMPUTERS THAT CARE:
Cambridge University professor Peter Robinson says GPS navigation devices of the future may be smart enough to know when they’ve upset a motorist and react accordingly. His ‘Emotional Robotics Department’ is working on smart computers capable of detecting and reacting to users’ moods by tracking facial expressions, hand gestures, even tone of voice. When it detects stress, the system will stop giving instructions until the driver has recovered composure. (And entered a freeway going the wrong way.)
– “Daily Telegraph”

LEARNING FROM MOM HOW TO FAKE-BAKE:
Like mother, like daughter. So says a new study about the habits of female college students who use tanning beds. A new report published in the “Archives of Dermatology” finds that nearly 40% of respondents used a tanning bed for the first time while accompanied by their moms. And students whose mothers introduced them to tanning began at an average age of 14, two years younger than other students. (Hmm, seems skin cancer can be inherited.)
– Stylelist.com

TOO STUPID FOR US TO MAKE UP:
• Gatineau, Québec – A homeowner wants gun-wielding cops to apologize for wrongly busting into his house, believing that an out-of-control pot party was blazing inside. Officers told the terrified and innocent resident it was all a mistake as they’d erroneously identified what they thought was the aroma of marijuana. It turned out to actually be … a skunk.
– AHN
• Naples, Italy – A 28-year-old man who was shot in the head by a stray bullet during New Year’s Eve celebrations is now recovering after … sneezing it out through his nose. While sitting in a waiting room awaiting a doctor’s appointment, he sneezed and the bullet shot out of his right nostril.
– Telegraph.co.uk
• Sundsvall, Sweden – The local  Communal Landlords Association is now offering a reward for reports of people who are smoking in buildings where it is banned. Ratting on neighbors who light up on the sly can be very lucrative … 5,000 kronor ($740) per puffer.
– AFP

IF YOU SERVE IT, THEY WILL COME:
Under pressure from moviegoers as well as the movie industry, theater chains are trying to win back patrons … with food. Audiences at a growing number of theaters can now order such exotic dishes as Chinois Chicken Salad Rolls or Limoncello-Tossed Shrimp. Simpler fare is also available, such as cheeseburgers and chicken Caesar salads. Seats in these so-called ‘in-theater dining’ cinemas are big & plush; lobbies are luxurious; popcorn is often complimentary; and a full bar is de rigueur. (And we’re guessing a ticket is like $189.95)
– “Wall Street Journal”

FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BUGGY:
What? The old order Amish and Mennonites are into rollerblading? Yep, over the last few years hundreds of them, mostly the younger generation, have taken up in-line skating to run errands, play hockey, or just zigzag around for pleasure. Among the 150,000 or so who live in 230 settlements in 22 US states and Canada, in-line skating is justified as an efficient, sensible means of locomotion, another example of how the modern can square with the traditional. (As long as your skates are black.)
– “New York Times”

FOR THE RECORD:
A baby girl named Lylah Lynne was born in a Las Vegas NV hospital at 1:11 pm on Tuesday, which just happened to be 1/11/11. (Get this kid to a craps table – fast!)
– NYPost.com

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• A total of 79 mass shootings occurred in the USA between 2007 and 2009. Criminologists consider an incident a ‘mass shooting’ when there are 4 or more victims.
– TTP
• Feel a cold coming on? To relieve symptoms, natural medicine experts recommend that, in addition to vitamin C, you also take regular doses of garlic.
– “Natural Health”

BS CHRONOMETER 01.14.11

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1919 [92] Andy Rooney, Albany NY, TV curmudgeon/commentator (“60 Minutes” since 1978)

1963 [48] Steven Soderbergh, Atlanta GA, movie director (“Oceans 11-13”, Oscar-“Traffic”)

1968 [43] LL Cool J (James Todd Smith), Bay Shore NY, rap artist (“Luv U Better”, “All I Have”)/movie actor (“Last Holiday”, “Charlie’s Angels”)

1969 [42] Dave Grohl, Warren OH, rock singer/guitarist (Foo Fighters-“The Pretender”, Them Crooked Vultures-“New Fang”, Nirvana-“Smells Like Teen Spirit”)

1969 [42] Jason Bateman, Rye NY, movie actor (“Up In the Air”, Juno”)/TV actor (“Arrested Development” 2003-06, “Silver Spoons” 1982-84, “Little House On the Prairie” 1981-82)

1982 [29] Caleb Followill, Mount Juliet TN, rock singer/guitarist (Kings of Leon-“Use Somebody”, “Sex on Fire”)

SATURDAY –
Movie actress Andrea Martin  (“My Big Fat Greek Wedding”) is 64; TV/movie actor Chad Lowe (“Unfaithful”) is 43; TV actor Eddie Cahill (“CSI: New York”) is 33; NFL quarterback Drew Brees (New Orleans Saints) is 32; Rapper Pitbull (“I Know You Want Me”) is 30.

SUNDAY –
Pop/jazz singer Sade (“Soldier of Love”) is 52; Pop singer Maxine Jones (En Vogue) is 45; Fashion model Kate Moss is 37; Rock guitarist Nick Valensi (The Strokes) is 30; NFL quarterback Joe Flacco (Baltimore Ravens) is 26.

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Assembly Line Workers Day”, observed on the anniversary of the 1st ‘Automobile Assembly Line’, created by Henry Ford 97 years ago (1914).
• “Caesarean Section Day”, commemorating the first successful procedure of the kind, performed in 1794 by Dr Jesse Bennet in Edom VA on his wife. (To celebrate, leave your house this morning by going out through a window.)
• “Dress Up Your Pet Day”, a day to assert our dominance over the dumb creatures of the animal kingdom by humiliating them in human attire … then laughing at them.
• “Makar Sankranti”, the mid-Winter festival of India & Nepal that marks the transition of the Sun beginning it’s northward journey, what’s called the ‘Uttarayan’. The event is marked by flying kites. (Hey, if it means Spring is getting a bit closer … we’re all for it!)
• “Work at Home With Your Spouse Day”, to encourage couples to make the most of their relationship & skills by starting a business together. Here’s a list of 5 ways to do it without killing each other …
NET: http://bit.ly/9tMkrV

SATURDAY –
• “Fresh Squeezed Juice Day”. So what’s your preference: Orange? Grapefruit? Potato?
• “Hat Day”, a day to dispel the boredom of mid-Winter by wearing the goofiest hat you can find. (Always hilarious on radio.)
• “Humanitarian Day”, a day of respect observed on Dr Martin Luther King Jr’s (real) birthday.
• “International Fetish Day”, celebrating the various kinds of kink that the kinky get off on.
• “North American International Auto Show”, one of the world’s largest, opens to the public through January 23rd in Detroit MI. Over 700,000 visitors are expected.
NET: http://www.naias.com

SUNDAY –
• “International Hot & Spicy Food Day”, encouraging us to spice up our lives in order to add some zest to a winter’s day. What’s the absolute hottest thing you’ve ever put in your mouth?
NET: http://bit.ly/f1jcPY
• “Religious Freedom Day”, when you all have the right to believe the same stuff I do.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1990 [21] “The Simpsons” debuts as a series on FOX-TV after being a regular feature on the “Tracy Ullman Show” since 1987

1993 [18] Upset that Jay Leno has been awarded hosting duties on the “Tonight Show”, David Letterman agrees to leave NBC-TV for a $16-million late-night contract with CBS-TV

2000 [11] “Late Show” host David Letterman undergoes emergency quintuple bypass surgery after a test determines one of his arteries is seriously constricted

2000 [11] “Girl, Interrupted”, a drama starring Winona Ryder as a troubled detainee in a psychiatric ward opens in movie theaters, introducing most of us to up & coming actress Angelina Jolie (who eventually wins an Oscar for ‘Best Actress in a Supporting Role’)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1966 [45] British rocker David Jones changes his name to ‘David Bowie’

1970 [41] Diana Ross & The Supremes perform their final concert together, at the Frontier Hotel in Las Vegas

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1734 [277] ‘Coldest Temperature’ in Northern Hemisphere recorded in Siberia at -120 F (ever since, weather lore has labelled today the ‘Coldest Day Of the Year’)

1943 [68] ‘World’s Largest Office Building’ is completed, the Pentagon, headquarters for the US Department of Defense

1973 [38] Last ‘Perfect NFL Season’ as Miami Dolphins beat Washington Redskins 14-7 at Super Bowl VII in Los Angeles to finish with a 17-0 record (members of that Dolphin team still gather to celebrate when the last undefeated NFL team finally loses each season)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Mon] Customer Service Day
[Mon] Kid Inventors Day
[Mon] Martin Luther King Day (USA)
[Tues] Winnie the Pooh Day
[Tues] Rid the World of Fad Diets & Gimmicks Day
This Week Is … Cuckoo Dancing Week
This Month Is … Mail-Order Gardening Month

BULL’S BITS

Just in time for another weekend-full of NFL playoffs …
BS REASONS FOOTBALL IS BETTER THAN SEX :
• You have a coach on the sidelines
• There is instant replay.
• People cheer when you score.
• You can take a timeout if you’re tired.
• Protective equipment is reusable.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
You know you’re getting old when ‘getting lucky’ means you find your car in the parking lot.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
What was NBC-TV’s original name for the “Today” show, which debuted on this date in 1952?
a. “The Wake Up Show”
b. “The Rise & Shine Revue” [CORRECT]
c. “Good Morning, America”
– Halife.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
What do you notice first about someone of the opposite sex? (An “American Woman” magazine poll finds that women check out a man’s looks first, then concentrate on honesty and a sense of humor. Men, on the other hand, lingeringly look at a woman’s overall beauty, then ogle her body in particular, and THEN notice her personality.)

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: When going out together, men are 4 times more likely to do THIS than women.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Take the wheel of the vehicle.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
In the race for quality, there is no finish line.