Bull Works!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Despite no discernible talent Tori Spelling keeps landing reality shows, the next being “Tori & Dean: Weddings”, in which she & hubby Dean McDermott plan dream weddings for couples (they’re more qualified for a show called “Tori & Dean: Homewreckers”) . . . Jessica Simpson is on the cover of the May edition of “Marie Claire” with absolutely no makeup or Photoshop touch-up, to promote her MTV show “Jessica Simpson’s The Price of Beauty” (this could help magazine sales – no one will recognize her!) . . . Actor Chris Meloni says rumors that he’s leaving “Law & Order: SVU” (NBC) are quote: “Lies, all lies” (BS translation: We’re still in contract negotiations) . . . This week 3 more of actor Nicolas Cage’s properties have been repossessed by a bank after they failed to reach the minimum bid of $10 million at auction (he’s now liquidated 6 – how many freakin’ houses does this guy have?) . . . 23-year-old “Twilight Saga” star Robert Pattison has been immortalized in an 18-kg (40-lb) bust made of solid Belgian chocolate which one fan will win in an online promotion (NET: http://bit.ly/aNvJk6) . . . Because we really need to know, “Us Weekly” quotes a source as saying Tiger & Elin Woods ‘definitely have not been intimate’ since his scandal broke (thanks for sharing) . . . On the other hand, singer-turned-fashion designer Victoria Beckham has devised a ‘timetable’ for intimate relations with her soccer star-hubby David Beckham in a bid to have another baby, an insider claiming he’s ‘exhausted’ after doing it up to 5 times a day (Jesse James isn’t busy – need help?).
WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Hour” (CBC) – Tonight Nickelback (“Dark Horse”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight All-American Rejects (“When the World Comes Down”).
• “Kenny Rogers: The First 50 Years” – Saturday a TV special honoring the singing career of Kenny Rogers is being taped at the MGM Grand at Foxwoods in Connecticut. Scheduled to appear: Alison Krauss, Chris Isaak, Dolly Parton, Oak Ridge Boys, Sheena Easton, Smokey Robinson, and Wynonna; and, via remote hook-up, Billy Currington, Darius Rucker, and Tim McGraw. The show has yet to find a TV network. (If you make it, they will come?)
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Never Shout Never (“What Is Love?”).
• “Oprah Winfrey Show” (syndicated/CTV) – Today Kenny Chesney (“Summer in 3D”, opening April 21st).
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – “SNL” alum Tina Fey hosts; musical guest Justin Bieber.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Beyoncé – Jay-Z is reportedly teaching his wife how to drive and she’s doing so well he’s planning to get her a car of her own. True stardom: She’s 28 and never had to drive herself anywhere.
• The Doors – The new documentary “When You’re Strange: A Film About the Doors” features snippets of “HWY: An American Pastoral”, an experimental film shot by Jim Morrison in 1969. This allows the creation of a surreal scene showing Morrison driving down a highway while his death is announced on the radio.
• Keith Urban – It’s been announced he’ll receive the ‘Jim Reeves International Award’ for outstanding contributions to worldwide acceptance of country music at the “ACM Awards” April 18th in Las Vegas.
• Pat Green – Tonight the “Wave On Wave” country singer who left BNA Records last year will record a live album at the Nutty Brown Café in Austin, Texas for his own label.
• Rolling Stones – Their 1966 hit “19th Nervous Breakdown” serves as the main title theme for “Miami Medical”, the new CBS-TV action-drama series airing tonight.
• Shania Twain – She’s signed to star in the reality TV show “Why Not? With Shania Twain” on OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network). The show will follow her as she attempts a career comeback. A broadcast date for the series has yet to be announced.
• 30 Seconds To Mars – Tonight in Las Vegas they kick off the North American leg of their “Into the Wild” world tour. MuteMath and Neon Trees are opening all dates.
• Usher – His chart-topping new album “Raymond v Raymond” is his 3rd consecutive #1 debut on the “Billboard” album chart.
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Date Night” ( PG-13 Action Comedy ): Two of TV’s biggest stars, Steve Carell (“The Office”) & Tina Fey (“30 Rock”) play a bored NYC married couple whose attempt at a glamorous, romantic evening turns into something more thrilling and dangerous thanks to a case of mistaken identity. Co-stars Mark Wahlberg (“The Lovely Bones”), rapper Common, Leighton Meester (“Gossip Girl”), Mark Ruffalo (“Shutter Island”).
NET: http://www.datenight-movie.com
• “Letters to God” ( PG Family Drama ): Tanner Maguire, Jeffrey Johnson, and Robyn Lively star in this story of a young boy who writes letters to God as he fights cancer, inspiring, among many other people, a postal worker who is tasked with ‘delivering’ the boy’s mail. An inspirational film shot by Possibility Pictures in Orlando and Winter Garden, Florida.
NET: http://www.letterstogodthemovie.com
THE GENESIS OF ‘THE YIPS’:
University of Chicago psychology professor Sian Beilock has found that when experienced golfers are asked to pay attention to a particular part of their swing, they almost all inevitably screw up. Why? All those conscious thoughts erase years of practice and the ingrained talent disappears. Beilock says this proves that when you are at a high level, your skills become somewhat automated, and you don’t need to pay attention to every step of what you’re doing. (Like Miley Cyrus acting … or maybe not.)
– “Wall Street Journal”
SO LONG, CONSOLE:
Hideo Kojima, one of the world’s most famous videogame creators, sees a future for digital entertainment outside the box … in fact, outside any box. Kojima, whose “Metal Gear Solid” games have sold more than 27 million copies, says the future of videogaming is on networks that will free players from consoles supplied by the likes of his long-time partner Sony Corp. In the near future, he predicts, we’ll have games that don’t depend on any platform. (Aren’t you glad you dropped 400 bucks on that Xbox 360?)
– Reuters.com
BS QUICKIES:
• The sheriff of Maricopa County, Arizona has started a program he calls ‘Pedal Vision’, in which inmates at Phoenix’s Tent City Jail have to pedal stationary bikes to power TV sets for viewing.
– Associated Press
• A Chinese woman has become the world’s oldest primary school pupil after going back to school in the city of Jinan at the age of … 102.
– “Qilu Evening Post”
• A 12-year-old boy has spent more than $950 on his mother’s credit card and $440 of his own savings on the popular Facebook game “FarmVille”. He must have one killer farm!
– Guardian.co.uk
• An airline passenger on a Qantas flight from Sydney to Singapore has had to be restrained by flight stewards after he threatened to bring down the plane with … the power of his mind.
– ABC.net.au
• A British woman has lost nearly 70 lbs in 5 months after being hypnotized into believing … she has undergone gastric bypass surgery and her stomach is only the size of a golf ball.
– NYPost.com
‘SPENDING A PENNY’ TO COST MORE:
Irish budget airline Ryanair has announced it will boost the charge for checking in luggage from £15 ($23) to £20 ($30) during July and August. A spokesman says the charge is to encourage passengers to travel light. The airline has also made it official it will be introducing a charge for using airliner restrooms after the Summer vacation rush is over. It’ll cost you either £1 or 1 euro to use the coin-operated facilities. (Likely only a matter of time till this catches on elsewhere.)
– “Financial Times”
ONLINE CARPING:
A new website allows you to trash your boss … anonymously. ‘Unvarnished’ creates an open forum to rate professionals in the workplace, for better or worse. You can even dish about your co-worker’s job performance. The concept is a tad controversial because it allows employees to be reviewed anonymously and with no way of removing a negative review. The site’s creators think there’s a market for honest, unfiltered feedback about how individuals perform on-the-job.
NET: http://www.getunvarnished.com/beta
– “TIME”
FOR THE RECORD:
41-year-old John McAllister of Portland, Oregon has set a new record by playing the vintage arcade videogame “Asteroids” for 58 hours straight to rack up 41,338,740 points. That beats the previous high score of 41,336,440 set by a 15-year-old … in 1982. (Next he’ll try “Pong”?)
– Ananova News
BS AMAZING FACT:
Pro wrestlers average 300 days per year on the road.
– TheToiletPaper.com
BS CHRONOMETER 04.09.10
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1926 [84] Hugh Hefner, Chicago IL, “Playboy” magazine founder BS FACTOID: He says it’s possible he may wed his current girlfriend, 23-year-old ‘Playmate’ Crystal Harris. (Creepy!)
1954 [56] Dennis Quaid, Houston TX, movie actor (“GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra”, “Flight Of the Phoenix”)/brother of actor Randy Quaid
1966 [44] Cynthia Nixon, NYC, movie actress (“Sex & the City: The Movie”)/TV actress (‘Miranda Hobbes’ on “Sex & the City” 1998-2004)
1977 [33] Gerard Way, Summit NJ, alt-rock singer (My Chemical Romance-“Famous Last Words”, “Welcome to the Black Parade”)
1986 [24] Leighton Meester, Ft Worth TX, TV actress (‘Blair Waldorf’ on “Gossip Girl” since 2007)/movie actress (“Date Night”)/pop singer (w/Cobra Starship-“Good Girls Go Bad”)
1987 [23] Jesse McCartney, Ardsley NY, pop singer (“Leavin’”)/songwriter (“Bleeding Love”)/movie actor (“Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Squeakuel”)
1990 [20] Kristen Stewart, LA CA, movie actress (“The Runaways”, Twilight Saga” films)
SATURDAY –
Retired sportscaster John Madden (“Sunday Night Football”) is 74; Producer/pop singer Babyface is 52; Rock guitarist Mike Mushok (Staind) is 40; NHL player Sean Avery (NY Rangers) is 30; Rock bassist Bryce Soderberg (Lifehouse) is 30; TV actress Chyler Leigh (“Grey’s Anatomy”) is 28; Movie actress/pop singer Mandy Moore (“License to Wed”) is 26; NHL player Dion Phaneuf (Toronto Maple Leafs) is 25.
SUNDAY –
Country singer Steve Azar (“I Don’t Have To Be Me [‘Til Monday]”) is 46; Rock drummer Chris Gaylor (All-American Rejects) is 31; NHL player Alex Burrows (Vancouver Canucks) is 29; Soul singer Joss Stone (“You Had Me”) is 23.
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Astronauts Day”, celebrating the dedication and courage of those who dare to dream and reach for the stars … while wearing adult diapers.
• “Cherish an Antique Day”, one of the few things that increases in value the older it gets.
• “Former Prisoner of War Recognition Day”, observed annually to commemorate the outstanding sacrifices made by members of the armed forces who’ve been held captive.
• “Name Yourself Day”, a day for anybody with a name they hate to tag themselves with a brand new label. Help re-name people using the online ‘Random Name Generator’ …
NET: http://www.kleimo.com/random/name.cfm
• “Vimy Ridge Day” in Canada, commemorating the 4-day WW1 ‘Battle of Vimy Ridge’ (1917) in France, during which close to 3,600 members of the Canadian Corps lost their lives. A 250-acre portion of the battleground now serves as site of the Canadian National Vimy Memorial.
NET: http://bit.ly/aaSuRi
SATURDAY –
• “Baby Massage Day”, observed annually on the 2nd Saturday in April to salute the growing practice that is said to soothe, relax, and stimulate babies.
NET: http://www.babymassage.net
• “Canadian Wildlife Week”, first declared in 1947 to honor the birth date of Jack Miner (April 10), a founder of Canada’s conservation movement and namesake of the world famous waterfowl sanctuary in Kingsville ON which he established in 1904. He’s credited as a key player in saving Canada Geese from extinction.
• “Siblings Day”, honoring brothers & sisters who are living, those who aren’t … and perhaps those who shouldn’t be.
SUNDAY –
• “Barbershop Quartet Day”, honoring the 1938 founding of SPEBSQSA (‘Society for the Preservation & Encouragement of Barber Shop Quartet Singing in America’) in Tulsa OK. (Altogether now … hummmm.)
• “World Parkinson’s Disease Day”, observed annually on the birth date of Sir James Parkinson (1755-1824), the English physician who first studied the disorder. The red tulip, official flower of “World PD Day”, is worn to create awareness and encourage new research and treatments.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2005 [05] Britain’s Prince Charles & Camilla Parker Bowles wed in Windsor, England
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1977 [33] Abba’s “Dancing Queen” reaches #1 on pop charts
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1945 [65] NFL makes socks mandatory for all football players (the next season … pants!)
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1992 [18] ‘Heaviest Chocolate Easter Egg’ weighs 10,483 lbs and measures over 23-ft-high (Ringwood, Australia)
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Mon] Licorice Day
[Mon] Walk on Your Wild Side Day
[Tues] International Moment of Laughter Day
[Wed] Be Kind to Lawyers Day
[Thurs] Equal Pay Day
This Week Is … Work Zone Safety Awareness Week
This Month Is … Sea Cadet Month
BULL’S BITS
YOU MIGHT BE ANAL-RETENTIVE IF …
• You eat M&Ms in color order.
• You fold your dirty clothes before putting them in the hamper.
• All your canned goods are facing forward on the kitchen shelf.
• Your sock drawer is in alphabetical order.
• You’ve organized your closet by color, season, and fabric.
• You flame anyone who posts items on your Facebook wall that aren’t grammatically correct.
• You fold up take-out food wrappers and neatly place them in the package before … throwing it in the trash.
– Adapted from YouMightBe.com
BS RANDOM JOKE:
Sorry, I don’t date outside my species.
BS PHONE STARTER:
Are CCTV (closed-circuit television) security cameras in public areas a good idea or an invasion of privacy? (London is widely considered the world’s most closely watched city with an estimated 500,000 cameras. Chicago has linked thousands of both public and private cameras in a network covering most of the city.)
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: Women do THIS 3 times more often at work than men do.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Make coffee.
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Crises bring out the best in the best of us, and the worst in the worst of us.
