Friday, April 17, 2020 — Edition: #6678
Ah, the Sweet Smell of BS!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Leonardo DiCaprio is giving a lucky fan the chance to be in a movie with him, to help raise money for coronavirus relief efforts and his “Feeding America” charity. He’s asking people to donate to the “All-In Challenge”, with one lucky winner winning a cameo in the new film “Killers of the Flower Moon”, directed by Martin Scorsese and starring Robert De Niro alongside DiCaprio. The winner also gets to spend the day on set and attend the premiere.
-ContactMusic
★ Dr. Paul Nassif is used to spending time in hospitals, but he’ll be spending a little more time there in a matter of months because his wife, Brittany Pattakos, will be welcoming a baby! The “Botched” star excitedly shared the news on Instagram on Wednesday by posting a picture of the sonogram. The big news comes after the two tied the knot six months ago in a lavish ceremony on the Greek island of Santorini.
-TheBlast
★ Despite being given clearance resume live shows in Florida, the WWE says it will furlough staff and cut executive pay in an attempt to weather the economic storm brought on by the coronavirus pandemic. The Vince McMahon-led wrestling business will also defer spending on its new headquarters for at least six months. The WWE expects to save around $4 million per month and improve cash flow by $140 million.
-TheWrap
★ Amy Schumer has changed her son Gene’s name after realizing she and her husband, Chris Fischer, had inadvertently given him an unfortunate handle. The 11-month-old was named Gene Attell Fischer at birth, but on her podcast, she said: “It’s now Gene David Fischer. It was ‘Gene Attell’ Fischer but we realized that we by accident named our son, ‘genital’.”
-Canoe
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Hugh Jackman, Rose Byrne, Kesha
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Larry David, Caitlin Kalafus (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Usher, Alison Pill, Javier Hernández (R)
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Mercedes Javid, Nema Vand
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Bob Saget, Leslie Jordan
• “The Talk” (CBS): Drew Carey
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Julia Stiles, Scott Wolf (R)
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): A new Message from Montana, repeat segments with Darci Lynne Farmer, Hoda Kotb (R)
• “Friday Night in With the Morgans” (AMC): Series premiere. Jensen and Danneel Ackles (“Supernatural”); Christian Serratos (“The Walking Dead”); the Morgans’ family physician, Dr. Sharagrim Kemp
SATURDAY-
• “One World: Together at Home” (ABC/CBS/NBC): Jimmy Kimmel, Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Fallon host a celebration in support of frontline healthcare workers in the fight against the COVID-19 pandemic.
• “Crikey! It’s the Irwins: Bindi’s Wedding” (ANIMAL PLANET): Bindi and Chandler prepare for the happiest day of their lives; the coronavirus pandemic causes them to make difficult and drastic changes to the wedding of their dreams.
• “Nature of Love” (HALLMARK): City girl Katie is writing a magazine feature on a glamping resort. Far from sporty, she faces her fears trying the camp’s activities with Will, a rugged outdoorsman and nature guide.
SUNDAY-
• “American Idol” (ABC): This Is Me (part #2): A deeper look into the lives of the top 21 contestants, featuring never-before-seen performances.
• “Dragnificent!” (TLC): Series premiere. Corinne is a tough wrestler who hides her insecurities behind her wrestling persona; the Queens give her a bridal transformation with the confidence to be her true self on her wedding day.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Miley Cyrus – Her collaboration with Blink-182 ‘I Really Wish I Hated You’ has leaked online. The song was originally intended for the band’s “Nine” album last year, but was released without her featured vocals. This week, it was rumored that it will appear on Cyrus’ upcoming rock album.
• Demi Lovato – although she is currently believed to be dating Max Ehrich, she told an interviewer this week: “I think it could be so much fun to share children with a woman … So, I don’t know what my future will look like, and I’m open to anything.”
• Michael Bublé – His wife Luisana Lopilato has defended her marriage following Twitter speculation that she might be in trouble. Fans attacked Bublé after he appeared to interrupt and grab her during a video message, which went viral. The responses prompted her to jump on Twitter and assure everyone that her marriage is in great shape and she loves her husband.
• Queen – Guitarist Brian May has emulated his iconic 2002 guitar solo of ‘God Save The Queen’ which he played during Queen Elizabeth II’s Golden Jubilee as part of a new charity single with Kings Daughters. ‘Get Up’ is designed to help people get through the coronavirus pandemic.
• David Bowie – The first clip has been released from his upcoming unauthorized biopic “Starman”. The film is set in 1971, when Bowie heads out on his first trip to America. It also traces how he built his ‘Ziggy Stardust’ persona a few years later.
• Florida Georgia Line — Tyler Hubbard and Brian Kelley shared a special at-home performance of their current single ‘I Love My Country’ via Facebook. The duo sings while their backup band contributes instrumentation from the comfort of their own homes. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/t2whcdl
• Miranda Lambert – says that like many of us, she can’t see her friends and family in person due to the pandemic, so she is taking things virtual. She posted: “I have come to realize just how important connection with home is, I have relied on virtual happy hours and calls to family and friends so much.” She followed that up with a plug for her family’s business “Red 55 Winery”.
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
***Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, and the fact that most theatres are closed, all major movie releases have been put on hold.***
THEY DON’T CALL IT “THE GREAT OUTDOORS” FOR NOTHING:
If my social media feeds are any indication, people who are practicing isolation these days are not only dealing with boredom, but also anxiousness, uncertainty and good old-fashioned stress as we come to the end of another week of near-lockdown. If you feel that your mental health could use a boost, the results of a study from 2019 could help. It determined that taking at least twenty minutes out of your day to stroll or sit in a place that makes you feel in contact with nature will significantly lower your stress hormone levels. The researchers urged healthcare practitioners to use the conclusions of the study to prescribe “nature-pills” as a low-cost solution to reduce the negative health impacts from growing urbanization and indoor lifestyles. They found that while a 20-minute nature experience was enough to significantly reduce cortisol levels, when test subjects spent as much as 30 minutes immersed in a nature experience, cortisol levels dropped at an even greater rate.
(Of course if you have a dog that’s anything like mine, you don’t have a choice!)
(With my luck, after about 10 minutes, it’ll start hailing!)
(That explains why my wife keeps driving me out to the middle of nowhere?)
-GoodNewsNetwork
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ A bakery in Finland has saved itself from financial ruin due to the pandemic by creating a cake that looks like a toilet roll. Staff at the Ronttosrouva bakery in Helsinki found all their orders cancelled last month, at the same time panicked consumers began to hoard toilet roll. This sparked the idea of a toilet roll cake made of oat batter, passion fruit mousse and covered with white fondant. The first five sold within an hour, and the cake became a social media hit. The bakery now has hundreds of orders and its owner has been able to hire two extra people. (My kids would go through a roll of this in a half-day too!)
➢ Fifty million pints of beer are expected to go to waste if British pubs are forced to remain closed into the summer because of coronavirus. Tom Stainer, chief executive of the Campaign for Real Ale, estimates that the UK’s 39,000 pubs have, on average, 15 barrels in their cellar. Most are kegs contain 11 gallons (88 pints) each. The best-before dates on pasteurised beer are usually three to four months after delivery, meaning most would go to waste if social distancing measures remain in place that long. The good news? Many breweries and distributors have offered to take back barrels at no charge once the lockdown is over. (Plus, think of all the “A priest walks into a bar” jokes that will never be told!)
➢ Early this month, news surfaced of an Indian couple naming their twins ‘Corona’ and ‘Covid’. Not to be outdone, a mom in the Philippines was inspired to name her baby boy after TWO major world events that took place around the same time. Welcome to the world, ‘Covid Bryant’. (‘Novel’ names, no?)
-Canoe, BBC, Cafemom
DID YOU KNOW?
In a new survey of 1,500 adults currently working at home due to the coronavirus pandemic, nearly half admitted that they had no idea what their significant other’s job involved until now.
-StudyFinds
BS CHRONOMETER 04.17.20
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1959 [61] Sean Bean, Handsworth UK, TV actor (‘Ned Stark’ on “Game of Thrones” 2011-19)/movie actor (“Lord of the Rings”)
1961 [59] Boomer (Norman) Esiason, West Islip NY, sports commentator (“The NFL Today on CBS” since 2002, “ABC Monday Night Football” 1998-99)/former NFL QB (Cincinnati Bengals, New York Jets, Arizona Cardinals)/NFL MVP 1988
1972 [48] Jennifer Garner, Houston TX, movie actress (“Dallas Buyers Club”, “Elektra”)/former TV actress (“Alias” 2001-06)
1974 [46] Victoria Beckham (Adams), Harlow UK, fashion maven (dVb)/former pop singer (as ‘Posh Spice’– Spice Girls-‘Wannabe’)/wed to English soccer star David Beckham since 1999.
1985 [35] Rooney Mara, Bedford NY, movie actress (“The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo”, “The Social Network”)
SATURDAY- Rick Moranis (“Honey, I Shrunk the Kids”) is 67; Ventriloquist Jeff Dunham is 58; Conan O’Brien (“Conan”) is 57; David Tennant (“Doctor Who”) is 49; Mark Tremonti (Creed) is 46; Melissa Joan Hart (“Sabrina the Teenage Witch”) is 44; Kourtney Kardashian (“Keeping Up With the Kardashians”) is 41
SUNDAY- Tim Curry (“Rocky Horror Picture Show”) is 74; Ashley Judd (“Double Jeopardy”) is 52; James Franco (“127 Hours”) is 42; Kate Hudson (“Almost Famous”) is 40; Hayden Christensen (“Star Wars: Episode II”) is 39; Tennis player Maria Sharapova is 33
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Bat Appreciation Day”, a day to generate positive awareness about bats ahead of possible negative interactions with people after their Winter-long hibernation (…plus some recent bad press!)
NET: http://www.batcon.org
• “Nosy Neighbor Appreciation Day”, a day to salute with a laugh the prying nature of those who continually insist on peeking-a-boo to find out what’s cooking in the neighborhood. (But remember – they can also let you know what your teenagers are up to when you’re not home!)
• “Blah Blah Blah Day”, a day to do all the things that people have been nagging you to do. This might include quitting a habit, losing weight, working on home projects, blah blah blah…
• “Cheese Ball Day”, saluting the hors d’oeuvre made with cream cheese, seasonings, and chopped nuts. (Also, apparently to celebrate the sense of humor displayed on this radio show…)
• “Haiku Poetry Day”, a celebration of the genre of poetry whose origins date back a millennium in Japan; and of English-language haiku, which has now been written for more than a century. To create one of these short poems, stick to a syllable pattern of 5-7-5. For example:
Haikus are easy,
But sometimes they don’t make sense
Refrigerator.
• “World Hemophilia Day”, a day of awareness of the genetic disorder that impairs the body’s ability to control bleeding through clotting or coagulation.
SATURDAY-
• “Adult Autism Awareness Day”, to create awareness of the Adult Autism Community, demonstrate the importance of transition planning, promote inclusiveness through education, and improve social and employment outcomes for adults with autism.
• “Newspaper Columnists Day”, initiated in 1995 by the National Society of Newspaper Columnists to increase awareness of the importance and contribution made by columnists and journalists worldwide. (Without whom, talk radio wouldn’t know where to go to find employees!)
• “National Animal Crackers Day”, bringing us back to our childhood and the many boxes of Animal Crackers we shared with our friends. Animal Crackers are a type of small cookie baked in the shape of circus or zoo animals, such as a lion, tiger, bear or elephant.
• “Pet Owners Independence Day”, for all of those who have pets. If you are a pet owner, be proud and celebrate yourself! You should do this by taking the day off work and sending your pet in your place. Then enjoy life from the perspective of your furry friend by sleeping and eating all day long.
• “World Amateur Radio Day”, honoring the worldwide hobby of ‘ham radio’. It’s observed on the anniversary of the 1925 founding of the International Amateur Radio Union.
(Amateur? Radio? Are you pointing at me?)
SUNDAY-
• “Amaretto Day”, Amaretto in Italian means “a little bitter” and is made from bitter almonds or apricot kernels, or both. The nuts are infused in pure alcohol or brandy, resulting in a strong almond flavor.
• “Garlic Day”, saluting the ‘stinking rose’ that has been cultivated as long as history has been recorded. It’s been said that if you rub a clove of garlic on your partner’s feet at night, you’ll taste it on their breath the next morning. Why you’d actually want to do this, no one knows. (Wearing 5 cloves on a necklace is also said to assist greatly with “social distancing…)
• “Hanging Out Day”, an initiative of Project Laundry List, promoting energy conservation by using a clothesline instead of an electric dryer. NET: http://www.laundrylist.org
(And while you’re at it, hang those garlic-y feet outside for a while, willya?)
• “Bicycle Day”, commemorating the date in 1943 that Dr. Albert Hofmann first tripped on LSD and bicycled home from his lab in Basel, Switzerland. During the ride, he experienced the psychedelic effects of LSD, making this the date of the first acid trip in history, propelling the West into the Psychedelic Age. (Who knew that the first acid trip was also a bicycle trip??)
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2011 [09] “Game of Thrones”, based on the fantasy novels by George R. R. Martin, premieres on HBO
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1983 [37] Joe Strummer of The Clash runs the London Marathon, finishing with a time of 4 hours 13 minutes. He claims that his training included 10 pints of beer the night before
2008 [12] Danny Federici, long-time organist with Bruce Springsteen’s E-Street Band, dies of melanoma at age 58 (Springsteen’s “Working on a Dream” album is dedicated to him)
2019 [01] Beyoncé releases a live album of her 2018 Coachella performance on the same day as the debut of her Netflix documentary “Homecoming”
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1964 [56] The Ford Mustang debuts at the World’s Fair in NYC (base price: $2,368)
TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1979 [41] ‘Smallest Crowd’ in Major League Baseball history as just 653 fans show up for an Oakland A’s baseball game (Until in 2015, when due to civil unrest, no spectators were admitted to a Camden Yards game between Baltimore and the White Sox)
[2012] Europe’s oldest intact book, the 8th century “St. Cuthbert Gospel”, is purchased by the British Library for 9 million pounds
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ Jim pranked Dwight 114 times throughout the entirety of the U.S. version of “The Office.”
✓ Post-it notes should be peeled horizontally, not in an upward motion, which causes the paper to curl.
✓ Men and women who listen to similar music tend to be better communicators and have longer- lasting relationships.
✓ When Montenegro became independent from Yugoslavia, its Internet domain name went from .yu to .me.
✓ 2.6 million Kenyans practice the “sport” of naked night-running.
✓ In 2011, a woman bought a “non-visible” piece of art for $10,000.
-WhattheFFacts, FactSlides
Best of BS . . .
BS UNAIRED TV SHOW EPISODES:
• Seinfeld: The one that was about something.
• Gilligan’s Island: The one where it turned out to be a peninsula.
• Leave it to Beaver: The one where June vacuums the living room while wearing sweats and smoking a cigarette.
• A “Co-pilot” episode. We often see “Pilot” episodes, but we never see the “Co-pilot”.
• Jersey Shore: The one where someone reads a book.
• The Dukes of Hazzard: The one where Bo and Luke finally realize Daisy is their SECOND cousin.
• Friends: The one where Angelina Jolie replaces Jennifer Aniston.
• Dick Van Dyke: The one where he finally decides to throw out that ottoman that he keeps tripping over.
• Sopranos: The one where we get to see what the heck happened.
• Maury: The one where Maury Povich finds out he’s the father.
-Twitter
BS ILL-CONCEIVED ADVICE:
• If it burns, just put some gasoline on it.
• No really, wear socks with them, totally hip.
• You should tweet drunk
• If you have an ant problem, buy some lizards.
• Tell your wife she’s not allowed to.
• Poke it and see if it’s dead.
• Just put it on the credit card
• Yes, ABSOLUTELY air your marital problems on Facebook. It’s like free therapy.
• If you’re sad, just keep drinking more.
• Don’t vote. It doesn’t matter.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2018
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ Good old McDonald’s is selling a new Big Mac with four patties. (Another great idea from their C-I-E-I-O!)
➠ A New Jersey man broke into a funeral home, stripped naked, then left a cold beer in a casket before being apprehended. (He was charged with two counts of burglary, criminal trespass and one count of impersonating #FloridaMan!)
➠ South America (Mexico, Peru, Argentina, et al) has seen 4 earthquakes this week, and 17 in the past 8 days. And Peru had an 8.0 earlier this year. (Let’s put it this way, those quakes were so powerful, the country split open and candy fell out…)
➠ We’ve known for a while that Katy Perry is pregnant, but she and Orlando Bloom recently announced they will be having a girl. (You know she’ll automatically possess striking feminine beauty. And she’ll probably get some good qualities from her mom, too.)
➠ Fact of the Day: People who feel an urge to correct other people’s grammar are actually suffering from a form of OCD called Grammar Pedantry Syndrome. (I would have put that last part in quotes. ..)
BS WEB GOODIE:
Great until it rains: https://tinyurl.com/t8954y6
BS PHONE STARTER:
What did you think would be easy, but turned out to be extremely difficult once you attempted it?
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I don’t think there needs to be two ‘S’s in “excessive”.
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 1/3 of women say they would love to change THIS about their man. What is it?
Answer: Table manners
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.
