Monday, April 8, 2019        Edition: #6431

Sheet Happens!

BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
“The Bull Sheet” is headed off for a late spring break and will not be publishing Monday April 15 through Monday April 22.  All subscribers will receive credit for missed service days.  The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Tuesday, April 23.

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Serena Williams may have just let the world’s biggest secret slip by accidentally revealing the gender of Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s royal baby. She sat for an interview with E! News and was asked about parenthood. During her answer, Serena said, “My friend is pregnant and she’s like, ‘Oh, my kid’s gonna do this,’ and I just looked at her and I was like, ‘No, she’s not.’” Meghan and Prince Harry have kept their royal due date a secret, but their first child is expected in the next few weeks.
-TheBlast
★ Film editor Barry Malkin, a two-time Oscar nominee best known for his many collaborations with Francis Ford Coppola, died on Thursday. He was 80. Malkin also worked on Coppola’s “Apocalypse Now,” “The Cotton Club,” “Peggy Sue Got Married,” “Rumble Fish” and “Gardens of Stone.” He’s also credited on 1992’s “The Godfather Trilogy,” which extended “The Godfather Saga” by adding “The Godfather Part III” to it.
-TheWrap
★ (***Caution: Contains “hell”***) Longtime friends and producing partners Will Ferrell and Adam McKay have decided to go their separate ways professionally and refocus their creative efforts. In a statement issued on Saturday, the two said: “The last 13 years could not have been more enjoyable and satisfying for the two of us at Sanchez Productions…The two of us will always work together creatively and always be friends. And we recognize we are lucky as hell to end this venture as such.”
-Yahoo
★ Adam Sandler is returning to the show where he launched his career – as guest host. He’ll front “Saturday Night Live” on May 4. Sandler became one of the sketch show’s writers in 1990 and was promoted to a regular performer a year later, playing memorable characters such as ‘Opera Man’, Cajun Man’ and ‘Canteen Boy’. He left the show in 1995. The will be his first SNL hosting gig.
-Canoe

WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Robert Downey Jr., Scarlett Johansson, Paul Rudd, Chris Hemsworth, 2 Chainz
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Hugh Jackman, Chrissy Metz, Juice WRLD
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Zach Galifianakis, Rep. Eric Swalwell, Ellie Goulding
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Kit Harington, Chelsea Clinton, Marina
• ” The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Bill Hader, Anna Chlumsky, Ally Brooke featuring Tyga
• “Conan” (TBS): John Bradley
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Jax Taylor, Brittany Cartwright
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Tracy Morgan
• “The Talk” (CBS): NeNe Leakes, guest co-host Kristine Johnson
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Hugh Jackman, Chrissy Metz
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Chelsea Handler, Jodie Comer
• “NCAA Basketball Tournament” (CBS): The national championship. From U.S. Bank Stadium in Minneapolis.
• “American Idol” (ABC): The remaining 10 contestants of the Top 20 perform duets with all-star celebrity partners from The Wiltern in Los Angeles.
• “The Voice” (NBC): The “Battle Rounds” continue as the coaches enlist music industry powerhouses Charlie Puth, Kelsea Ballerini, Brooks + Dunn and Khalid to prepare their artists to go head-to-head in the hopes of advancing to the next round.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Nipsey Hussle – His memorial service will take place at the Staples Center in Los Angeles on Thursday. The sports and concert venue, with a 21,000 capacity, was chosen by the late rapper’s family. Hussle was shot outside his LA clothing store March 31.
• Ed Sheeran — took to Instagram to ask food company Heinz if they want to collaborate with him. Sheeran says he has an ”idea” for a commercial.  He calls himself Heinz ketchup’s ”biggest fan”, so much so that he has a tattoo of the company’s logo.
• Avicii – His first posthumous track will be released this week. The family of the late Swedish DJ – will release a 16-track album of previously unheard material in June.
• Celine Dion — On Friday, she crashed a Las Vegas wedding with Jimmy Kimmel. Kimmel took over officiating the service, and Dion serenaded the lucky couple with her ballad, ‘Because You Loved Me’. “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” spent last week in Sin City at Planet Hollywood’s Zappos Theatre.
• Sugar Ray – Singer Mark McGrath has revealed that years of rock concerts have damaged his hearing. He’s working with specialists to slow down his hearing loss. Doctors have instructed him to wear in-ear devices to help protect his ears when he is onstage, but he isn’t sold on the idea.
• The Rolling Stones – will release a live album/DVD from their 1997-98 “Bridges to Babylon” tour on June 21. “Bridges to Bremen” features a 2.5-hour Stones concert recorded in the German city, plus bonus tracks from a Chicago show.
• Nirvana – Former manager Danny Goldberg says that frontman Kurt Cobain was envious of drummer Dave Grohl’s singing voice, long before Grohl formed the Foo Fighters. Goldberg has just published his memoir, “Serving the Servant: Remembering Kurt Cobain”.
• Little Big Town — debuted their new single, ‘The Daughters’, on the ACM Awards last night. Singer Phillip Sweet says, “We’re just really proud of this song and what it says.” The song, released on Friday, details the special challenges girls and women face due to societal expectations.
• Miranda Lambert — has revealed plans for her fall tour, and her support acts are some of the most popular women in music. Maren Morris, Elle King, Lambert’s trio Pistol Annies, Tenille Townes, Ashley McBryde and Caylee Hammack will join Lambert at various dates on the “Roadside Bars & Pink Guitars Tour”, which launches Sept. 13 in Uncasville, Conn. and runs through Nov. 23 in Greensboro, N.C.

NO THANKS:
How do you end your work-related emails?  Your name, sure, but how do you sign-off immediately before that?  Cheers?  Regards? Thanks? Email etiquette experts say that although using “Thanks” (or a variation of “Thank you”) as your sign off elicits by far the highest percentage of responses compared to other ways of closing an email, it can backfire.  William Schwalbe, co-author of “Send: Why People Email So Badly And How To Do It Better”, says that using a word of gratitude in your closer is not appropriate if the body of your email is a request. He says that thanking someone before they have agreed to do something is “presumptuous and kind of passive-aggressive.” He suggests using the word “sincerely” if your relationship with the recipient is a formal one. “Cheers” is appropriate for emails to colleagues to whom you are close. But for an all-purpose closer, experts agree that the best choice is…“best”.
(I always use “Thanks”, which, now that I think about it, doesn’t really make sense if I’m agreeing to do something for THEM…)
(I’m good with however someone wants to sign-off…as long as it isn’t “warmly”!)
(I’m thinking that from now on, I’ll go with “Seacrest…out!”)
-HuffingtonPost

A ‘COOLER’ TYPE OF YOGA:
Yoga is known for being quiet and peaceful and…Zen. But if that’s a little slow and…well, quiet and peaceful for you, maybe you’d like to try “rage yoga”. Just like traditional yoga, the idea behind rage yoga is to release tension and practice mindfulness.  The difference is in the way in which that is accomplished. Rage yoga involves loud music, middle fingers, and lots of yelling and swearing. And maybe the best thing: You get to drink beer instead of water! Rage yoga studios have popped up in numerous North American locations, and one operator in Houston calls her spot, “a safe space to let go of your frustration and rage in a healthy way and wash it all away with some ice-cold beer.”
(Or just call is what it is: A bar with no tables…)
(Between the beer and the yoga, I’m just afraid that I’ll overdose on Zen!)
(They serve beer?  And you thought you were worried about passing gas at a regular yoga class?)
-Relieved

GREAT QUOTES FROM MUSICIANS:
• “The first rule of drumming is that if you make a mistake, turn round and look angrily at the bass player.” – Nick Mason (Pink Floyd)
• “Is Ringo the best drummer in the world? He’s not even the best drummer in the Beatles” – John Lennon
• “Money can’t buy you happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it.” – David Lee Roth
• “That was a great time, the summer of ’71 – I can’t remember it, but I’ll never forget it!” – Lemmy Kilmister (Motorhead)
• “I’ve been all over the world and I’ve never seen a statue of a critic.”  – Leonard Bernstein.
• “I’ve never had a problem with drugs. I’ve had problems with the police” – Keith Richards
• “When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.” – Jimi Hendrix
-ClassicRockMagazine

THE 10 STAGES OF DINNERTIME WITH TODDLERS:
Getting young children to eat can be a long and frustrating process. Here are the steps …
1. Play it cool. (“This is fun isn’t it, eating a meal?”)
2. Ask politely. (“Please eat your dinner for Mommy.”)
3. Bribery. (“If you eat your dinner you can have ice cream.”)
4. Scare tactics. (“If you don’t eat your dinner you will not grow big and strong.”)
5. Emotional blackmail. (“You don’t want me to feel sad, do you?”)
6. Encourage them to feel fortunate. (Mention kids in Africa, Pago Pago, etc.)
7. Get firm. (“If you do not eat your dinner there is nothing else for you to have.”)
8. Beg. (“Please, please just half of your dinner?”)
9. Desperation. (“Eat one single pea and we’ll call it a day.”)
10. Wine. (You have lost … again. Give the kid a yoghurt and pour yourself a glass.)
– Adapted from “Metro”

DID YOU KNOW?
You shouldn’t make big decisions while a baby’s crying. According to Research, we’re hard-wired to want to help babies, and even if that baby’s not ours, and hearing them cry distracts us – and disrupts areas of our brain involved with decision-making.
(Is “changing the baby” considered a big decision?)
-UniversityofToronto

BS CHRONOMETER 04.08.19

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1960 [59] John Schneider, Mount Kisco NY, TV actor (“Dukes of Hazzard” 1979-85, “Smallville” 2001-11)/country singer (‘You’re the Last Thing I Needed Tonight’)

1962 [57] Izzy Stradlin (Jeffrey Isbell), Lafayette IN, rock guitarist-singer [co-founder of Guns N’ Roses (‘Sweet Child O’ Mine’), not part of the band’s current reunion]/ Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2012)

1963 [56] Dean Norris, South Bend IN, TV actor (“Breaking Bad” 2008-13, “Under the Dome” 2013-15) COMING UP…”Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark”, 2019

1966 [53] Robin Wright, Dallas TX, TV actress (‘Claire Underwood’ on “House of Cards” 2013-18)/movie actress (“Forrest Gump”) COMING UP…”Wonder Woman 1984″, 2020

1968 [51] Patricia Arquette, Chicago IL, movie actress (2015 Oscar-“Boyhood”)/TV actress (“CSI: Cyber” 2015-16, “Medium” 2005-11) COMING UP…”Toy Story 4″, 2019

1981 [38] Taylor Kitsch, Kelowna BC, movie actor (“X-Men Origins: Wolverine”)/TV actor (“True Detective” 2015, “Friday Night Lights” 2006-11)

1984 [35] Ezra Koenig, NYC, indie rock singer-guitarist (Vampire Weekend-‘Unbelievers’, ‘A-Punk’)

1997 [22] Sadie Calvano, LA CA, TV actress (‘Violet’ on “Mom” since 2013)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Dog Fighting Awareness Day”, initiated by the SPCA to increase awareness and encourage animal-lovers to take action against this brutal form of cruelty.

• “Dog Farting Awareness Day”, I’m not kidding. And if you have a dog, you are probably already aware!

• “International Day Of the Roma”, begun in 1990 to celebrate Romani culture and raise awareness of the issues facing Romani people, commonly misnamed ‘gypsies’.

• “International Feng Shui Awareness Day” [fung schway], celebrating the oriental ‘art of placement’ in which architecture and interiors are situated to blend with their surroundings.
NET: http://bit.ly/alpvPG

• “Trading Cards For Grown-ups Day”. After all, why should adults have to give up their precious trading cards just because they get older?

• “Zoo Lovers Day”,  a perfect day to visit a zoo and be one of the millions of people who visit them each year.
A few zoo facts:
-The Vienna Zoo is the oldest existing zoo and was opened to the public in 1765.
-The United States’ first public zoo, Central Park Zoo, opened in 1874 in New York.
-There are 350 zoos in the United States
-Approximately 175 million people visit a zoo each year.
-More than 4 million people visited the San Diego Zoo in 2018.
-Disney’s Animal Kingdom has had more than 20 million annual visitors.

COMING UP . . .
[Tues] Be Kind To Lawyers Day
[Tues] Name Yourself Day
[Wed] Golfer’s Day
[Wed] Farm Animals Day
This Week Is…National Library Week
This Month Is…Lawn and Garden Month

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2014 [05] WWE Hall of Fame wrestler ‘Ultimate Warrior’ (James Hellwig) dies of a heart attack at age 54 in Scottsdale AZ

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1994 [25] The body of Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain is found, the victim of a self-inflicted shotgun blast (it’s later determined the event occurred several days earlier, likely April 5th)

2006 [13] Rolling Stones make their China debut, performing a 2-hour show in front of 8,000 fans at the Shanghai Grand Stage

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2000 [19] In a “Saturday Night Live” skit where Blue Öyster Cult is recording ‘(Don’t Fear) The Reaper’, Christopher Walken demands more cowbell from Will Ferrell, who complies. A catch phrase is born.

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
✓ The International Space Station is the most expensive object ever built, at US$150 billion.
✓ Most diamonds on the Earth’s surface are between 1 and 3 billion years old.
✓ It takes 4-5 hours for your body to return to its normal temperature after doing exercise.
✓ Before fridges were invented, Russians and Finns kept their milk fresh by putting live frogs in it.
✓ If you bought $100 worth of Bitcoin in 2010, you would have had $75 million by May, 2017.
✓ The bailiff on “Judge Judy” makes $1 million per year.
-WhattheFFacts

BS REJECTED PEEPS FLAVORS:
• Salt and Vinegar
• Prune Juice
• Earwax
• Chicken
• Eggs Benedict
• Sonic the Hedgehog tongue kiss
• Sour Cream and Chives
• Hot Garbage
• Tuna Melt
• Urinal cake
-Twitter

Best of BS . . .
MORE BS THINGS EVERYONE DOES BUT WILL NEVER EVER ADMIT:
✓ Watch cartoons after a scary movie so you don’t have nightmares.
✓ Panicking while trying to find change in your wallet while holding up the next person in a lineup.
✓ Eating the wrapping paper stuck to frozen meat because you can’t get it off.
✓ Trying to act ‘natural’ when leaving a store without buying anything.
✓ Fake laughing when you have no idea what the other person just said.
✓ Pretending you might actually buy something after being given a free sample.
✓ Sounding out ‘Wed-nes-day’ in your head so you spell it correctly.
✓ Passing on buying the $250-worth of stuff in your online cart due to a $5.99 shipping charge.
✓ That face you make when walking by someone you know but not well enough to say hello to.
– Condensed from BuzzFeed.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Long ago when people cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it’s called golf.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  A survey asked women to name the professions that would make a man unattractive to date. What was #1?
Answer:  Mortician (Funeral Director)

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
A long life may not be good enough, but a good life is long enough.