Wednesday, April 17, 2024 — Edition: #7700
When You Can’t Dazzle Them with Brilliance, Baffle Them with Bull!
BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
The Bull Sheet staff will be on vacation and will not be publishing Monday, April 22 through Tuesday, April 30. Of course, all subscribers will receive credit for non-service days. The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Wednesday, May 1.
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Prince William is stepping out tomorrow for his first official duty since his wife Kate Middleton announced her cancer diagnosis. The Prince of Wales has been helping look after the couple’s 3 kids while they were on school vacation, and caring for Princess Kate, as she undergoes treatment. With the kids back in school, William will return to duty by highlighting the work of community and environmental organizations in London and Surrey, by visiting a food distribution charity, and later a youth center.
-People
★ Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan are entangled in an ongoing legal battle more than 6 years after announcing their split. The former couple is at odds over a settlement that includes profits from Tatum’s “Magic Mike” franchise, and both included each other on a “preliminary witness list” for a trial, according to documents. The key issues are division of property, and other financial issues. A rep for Dewan said she is looking to close this chapter on her life” with a fair settlement as soon as possible. No word from Tatum so far.
-People
★ “The Golden Bachelor” star Theresa Nist has addressed the feedback she’s received since she and Gerry Turner announced their divorce after just 3 months of marriage. In a lengthy Instagram post, she thanked everyone who offered “love, support and kindness” to her, and encouraged anyone who is “confused” by the split to “please try to find it in your heart to understand and to try a little kindness”. She called recent events “one of the most incredible experiences” of her life, and said it all proved that “even at the age of 70, you don’t know everything. Sometimes things don’t go the way you planned, and that’s okay.”
-NYPost
★ CBS has announced it will rebroadcast its “Billy Joel: The 100th – Live at Madison Square Garden” special in its entirety this Friday at 9pm ET, after Sunday’s presentation cut out in some parts of the country as he sang his signature hit ‘Piano Man’. A statement from CBS says: “A network programming timing error ended…(the) Billy Joel special approximately 2 minutes early…We apologize to Mr. Joel, his fans, our affiliated stations, and our audience whose viewing experience was interrupted during the last song.”
-Deadline
★ Congratulations are in order for Logan Paul and Nina Agdal. The Sports Illustrated model is pregnant with the couple’s first child. They broke the news online, writing: “Another Paul coming this Fall.” They also posted some sonograms of their new bundle of joy. TMZ quotes sources as saying that Agdal is a few months along in the pregnancy, and the 2 couldn’t be happier about the baby on the way. They’ve been dating since 2022, and he popped the question a year later.
-TMZ
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” (ABC/Global): Rob McElhenney, Chris Stapleton
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Julianne Moore, Lindsay Lohan, Joe List (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): John Lithgow, Doris Kearns Goodwin
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Patty Guggenheim, Betsy Sodaro, Utkarsh Ambudkar
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Josh Brolin, David Sedaris, Paloma Faith (R)
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Max Greenfield, Pam Grier
• “The Daily Show” (COM): Host Michael Kosta, Vampire Weekend
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): The cast of “A Different World”, Huey Lewis
• “Live With Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Lily Gladstone, Anderson Cooper
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Michael Douglas, Sunny Choi and Victor Montalvo, ERNEST
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Nicole Richie, The Grill Dads, Kristina Zias
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Sheryl Crow, Sabrina Elba
• “The Conners” (ABC): Feeling the cafeteria staff could use some organization, Darlene seeks to be manager of food services; Dan teaches housewives the basics of DIY.
• “The Masked Singer” (Fox): Group A Finals: Queen Night
• “Survivor” (CBS): After a big blindside, multiple castaways claim credit for the elimination, stirring the pot among their fellow tribemates.
• “NBA Basketball” (Check local listings): Play-in games: Miami @ Philadelphia; Atlanta Hawks @ Chicago
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• The Kid Laroi and Tate McRae – are official. After months of rumors, he confirmed to fans at his Sunday show in Ireland that the 2 are a thing. Between songs, he said: “I need everybody in here to sing this as loud as they can because my girlfriend’s here tonight, and I don’t want to look lame.” Fan cameras panned to stage left, where McRae was spotted giggling in reaction. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/282mycvy
• Benson Boone – His debut album “Fireworks & Rollerblades”, has debuted at #6 on the Billboard 200 album chart. The album’s success can be attributed, in part, to its debut single ‘Beautiful Things’, which spent 9 weeks in the top 5 on the Billboard Hot 100, peaking at #2.
• Ramones – Bandmembers’ relatives are dueling in lawsuits – in a long-simmering feud that threatens to torpedo a planned Netflix movie starring Pete Davidson as singer Joey Ramone. Guitarist Johnny Ramone’s widow is suing Joey’s brother for allegedly trying to cut her out of the film and the band’s merchandising deals. The brother, Mitchel Hyman claims the movie isn’t a band biopic.
• The Beatles — “Let It Be,” the film that documented their final performance before spending 5 decades in the vault, is getting a new life on Disney+, after a restoration job by Peter Jackson. It’ll debut on May 8. It follows Jackson’s Emmy-winning 2021 docuseries “The Beatles: Get Back,” which used footage originally shot for “Let It Be.”
• Billy Idol – Fresh off his announcement of a 13-city Canadian tour with Platinum Blonde this summer, he has put the word out that he has a new album coming. He wrote on X: “Did a photo shoot yesterday some of which will be used for the new Idol album coming in October…” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mrx3f9rx
• Conner Smith — The ‘Creek Will Rise’ singer tied the knot with Leah Thompson, in Wilmington NC on Friday. She captioned an Instagram carousel featuring pics from their big day with the words: ““Mr & Mrs Smith/4/12/24 [ring emoji].” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3fzbbj4f
• Jelly Roll – is being sued over his name. Kurt L. Titchenell, the leader of a Pennsylvania-based dance band called Jellyroll, has filed suit for trademark infringement, stating his band has used that name since 1980, and received a trademark in August, 2010. (So, you’re telling me that’s not his REAL NAME?)
• Lainey Wilson — will be the subject of a documentary produced by Robin Roberts’ production unit at ABC News, which will premiere on Hulu on May 29. It is one of several specials that Roberts is putting together, with a focus on telling the stories of empowered women.
SHOOTING THE BULL
SLEEP AID:
There’s nothing worse that having a young child who just can’t seem to fall asleep. I mean, there probably are worse things, but in the moment, when you’ve got to be up early for something? Nothing worse. So, good news here: Washington State University researchers say they’ve found the best way to put your child to sleep. Passive methods like cuddling and reading (or even singing) will not only help kids fall asleep faster, they also contribute to a positive temperament as they grow up. In their study, they also determined that some bedtime methods could do more harm than good. Like what? They say that walking, car rides, playing, and other active tactics to make kids fall asleep are associated with worsening attitudes in kids as they age. These children were more likely to have fussy or difficult temperaments.
(And funny enough, after unsuccessfully trying to get their kids to fall asleep for 15 years, so were their parents!)
[***Caution***] (Oh. That’s not what I thought at first when I heard “put kids to sleep”. Never mind. Carry on…)
-StudyFinds
INTEL ON AI:
❑ Some people are getting around the requirement of actually being present at their video meetings by digitally “cloning” themselves. Delphi, the world’s first digital cloning platform, uses data from podcasts, videos, PDFs and other content to develop an AI clone that can mimic the user’s thoughts and speech – and it all takes as little as one hour. According to company CEO Dara Ladjevardian, the clone can “learn how they think about the world”, and replicate those thoughts and the person’s mannerisms when participating in a call. While there is a free version for “beginners and casual users,” most users will pay a monthly fee of either $29, $99 or $399. (All I know is that if this catches on, you can expect ratings for “The View” to skyrocket!)
❑ The world’s first AI beauty pageant is getting set to award the hottest bot a grand prize of $13,000. Fanvue has announced its search for the sexiest chatbot babe, calling it the “first beauty pageant for AI-generated models.” The subscription-based social media platform says that contestants will be judged on their beauty, tech, and clout, for the chance to earn the Miss AI crown in May. Surprisingly, a panel of human judges will determine the sexiest pixelated pinups, which must be “100% AI-generated”. By the way, it’s their real-life makers who will actually pocket the winnings. (Just when you thought AI was propelling us into the future, these guys have taken us back about 50 years!) LINK: https://www.waicas.com/
-NYPost
ARACHNO-SOMNIA:
No one likes to have to stumble around the bedroom and hallway on the way to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Maybe that’s why a Japanese IT engineer has designed a night lamp that walks right along with you, lighting the way as it goes. Or, rather, it crawls right along with you – because it looks exactly like a spider. And of course, if you need to visit to loo in the wee hours, and this thing is turned on, it’ll seem as if a creepy creature is right behind you. The idea for the spider-legged lamp came to its inventor when he was trying to think of a way to put his 3D-printed robotic legs to good use. As a father, he was reminded of his own childhood, when he was terrified of going to the bathroom in the middle of the night, and the idea of a guiding night lamp was born. He calls his invention something that can “contribute to a sense of security as a reliable partner who walks with me in the dark.”
(I’m pretty sure his kids feel differently!)
(And just imagine the shadows it can make)
LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3mh28k6x
-OddityCentral
FIVE THINGS YOUR GROCERY STORE ISN’T TELLING YOU:
⇒ There’s more behind the store’s layout than you think: Fresh flowers at the entrance make it seem inviting. Produce and bakery – same thing, providing a sense of freshness. And the sweets and gum at the cash register? Very handy. (Same as the 13 magazines with Taylor Swift on the cover!)
⇒ End-of-aisle displays aren’t just a way to show off new stuff: Known as “endcaps” in the biz, they aren’t just to help you save money. They are used to highlight new products and get rid of discontinued items, and sometimes stores group together similar items, enticing you to purchase complementary products. (Ah! Like ketchup and eggs!)
⇒ Companies pay big bucks to display their products at eye-level: In addition to paying to show their stuff off in places like the ‘endcaps’, companies buy their way into the spots where your eyeballs are most likely to go—eye-level. (This is where being short comes in handy. You spot all the cheap stuff down near the floor!)
⇒ That mist might be as much for you as it is for the produce: Yes, the produce needs to stay hydrated, but it also makes it look fresher and more appetizing. Not only that, waterworks have been shown to add as much as 5% to the weight of the produce you buy. Cha-ching!
⇒ The music may make you buy more: We’ve all been there, when you notice that your supermarket is playing your fav jams. But it’s not that simple. One study found that the slower the songs played, the longer you shop. And vice-versa for fast songs. (So, listen and observe how often you hear slow-tempo music between “Clean up on aisle 5” announcements!)
(They’re also not telling you this: Half of those tangerines in your cart will be rotten before you get home!)
-TheBoot
DID YOU KNOW?
THIS is different. McDonald’s restaurants in the Netherlands have debuted a revolutionary way to attract business — by launching the world’s first billboard that smells like the food they serve. At first glance, the aromatic advertising initiative, which are logo-free, red and yellow billboards, remind you of sculptures from a minimalist modern art movement. But when pedestrians come within about 15 feet of them, they are greeted by the distinctive scent of McDonald’s fries. And how is the complex aroma of McD’s legendary French fries captured in a giant rectangle? Simple. An employee installs a tray of fries into the billboard, which relies on ventilators to “suck and diffuse” the scent. (Do you want fries with that billboard?) LINK: https://tinyurl.com/4wv5vyux
-NYPost
BS CHRONOMETER 04.17.24
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Bat Appreciation Day”, to generate positive awareness about bats ahead of possible negative interactions with people after their Winter-long hibernation (…plus some bad press in the past few years!) LINK: http://www.batcon.org
• “Nosy Neighbor Appreciation Day”, a day to salute with a laugh, the prying nature of those who continually insist on peeking-a-boo to find out what’s cooking in the neighborhood. (Why not give them something to talk about today?)
• “Blah Blah Blah Day”, a day to do all the things that people have been nagging you to do. This might include quitting a habit, losing weight, working on home projects, blah blah blah…
• “Cheese Ball Day”, saluting the hors d’oeuvre made with cream cheese, seasonings, and chopped nuts. (Also, apparently to celebrate the sense of humor displayed on this radio show…)
• “Banana Day”, celebrating…well, you know. The banana is the most popular fruit in the world. The average person eats about 100 each year. And why not? They are the cheapest fruit, and are high in fiber and potassium, which can help with high blood pressure, ulcers, calcium loss, and some cancers. (You had me at cheap!)
• “World Hemophilia Day”, a day of awareness of the genetic disorder that impairs the body’s ability to control bleeding through clotting or coagulation. LINK: https://wfh.org/world-hemophilia-day/
• “Haiku Poetry Day”, a celebration of the genre of poetry whose origins date back a millennium in Japan. To create one of these short poems, stick to a syllable pattern of 5-7-5. For example:
Haikus are easy,
But sometimes they don’t make sense
Refrigerator.
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] Animal Crackers Day
[Thurs] Piñata Day
[Fri] Rice Ball Day
[Sat] Husband Appreciation Day
This Week is…Animal Cruelty/Human Violence Awareness Week
This Month is…Move More Month
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1948 [76] Jan Hammer, Prague Czechoslovakia, rock keyboardist (‘Miami Vice Theme’, work with Jeff Beck, Mick Jagger, Carlos Santana…)
1959 [65] Sean Bean, Handsworth England, TV actor (‘Ned Stark’ on “Game of Thrones” 2011-19), “Snowpiercer” 2020-21)/movie actor (“Lord of the Rings”, “The Martian”)
1961 [63] (Norman) “Boomer” Esiason, West Islip NY, sports commentator (“The NFL Today on CBS” since 2002, “ABC Monday Night Football” 1998-99)/radio host (WFAN New York)/former NFL QB (Cincinnati Bengals, New York Jets, Arizona Cardinals)/NFL MVP 1988
1964 [60] Maynard James Keenan, Ravenna OH, alt-metal singer/songwriter (Tool-Sober’, Schism’)/Vineyard owner
1967 [57] Liz Phair, New Haven CT, indie-rock singer-songwriter (‘Why Can’t I’, ‘Extraordinary’)
1972 [52] Jennifer Garner, Houston TX, movie actress (“Dallas Buyers Club”, “Elektra”, “Daredevil” films)/TV actress (“Alias” 2001-06)/married to Ben Affleck 2005-18. COMING UP… “Deadpool & Wolverine” 2024
1974 [50] Victoria Beckham, Harlow England, pop singer (‘Posh Spice’ of Spice Girls-‘Wannabe’)/fashion maven (dVb, Victoria Beckham)/married to David Beckham since 1999
1985 [39] Rooney Mara, Bedford NY, movie actress (“The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo”, “Women Talking”)
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1937 [87] Cartoon character ‘Daffy Duck’ debuts in “Porky’s Duck Hunt”
2011 [13] “Game of Thrones”, based on the fantasy novels by George R. R. Martin, premieres on HBO
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1983 [41] Joe Strummer of The Clash runs the London Marathon, finishing with a time of 4 hours 13 minutes. He claims his training included 10 pints of beer the night before
2019 [05] Beyoncé releases a live album of her 2018 Coachella performance on the same day as the debut of her Netflix documentary “Homecoming”
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1964 [60] The Ford Mustang debuts at the World’s Fair in NYC (base price: $2,368)
TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1979 [45] It’s the smallest crowd in MLB history as just 653 fans show up for an Oakland A’s game. (…until in 2015, at least, when due to civil unrest, no spectators are admitted to a Camden Yards game between Baltimore and the White Sox)
2012 [12] Europe’s oldest intact book, the 8th century “St. Cuthbert Gospel”, is purchased by the British Library for 9 million pounds
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ A kimono literally translates to “thing to wear.”
✓ Tic Tacs got their name from the sound they make.
✓ Being ignored causes the same chemical reaction in the brain as experiencing a physical injury.
✓ Men and women who listen to similar music tend to be better communicators and have longer- lasting relationships.
✓ Mosquitoes have killed more humans than all the wars in history.
✓ Herring fish communicate by passing gas.
-WhattheFFacts, Facts
Best of BS . . .
MURPHY’S (OTHER) LAWS:
We all know that “if something can go wrong, it will.” Here are some more…
• Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
• If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
• Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.
• The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
• The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.
• Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.
•The opulence of the front office decor varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm.
• Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it, and he’ll touch it to be sure.
• The first myth of management is that it exists.
-First published in BS in 2017
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ The average tax refund for Americans this year is $3,207. (…Just enough to pay off a few credit cards, plan a vacation, buy some Facebook political ads under a fake name, etc. You know… the usual!)
➠ WrestleMania 40 happened last weekend. (I haven’t watched it yet, so don’t tell me who pretended to win!)
➠ The New York area has experienced multiple small earthquakes this month. If you’ve ever been through an earthquake, the worst thing is not that it is happening. It’s that when it starts, you don’t know how long it will last, or how bad it will be. (Kinda like a J-Lo marriage…)
➠ Did you know? Ducks can catch the Flu. It’s true! (That explains why the poor guy always felt “down”.)
➠ Fact of the Day: People who feel an urge to correct other people’s grammar are actually suffering from a form of OCD called Grammar Pedantry Syndrome. (I would have put that last part in quotes…)
BS WEB GOODIE:
Yup: https://tinyurl.com/4kvr4zm3
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I’ve found that if you tuck part of your pant leg inside your sock, people expect so much less of you…
BS WHICH CAME FIRST?
• Cellphones or GPS? [A Motorola researcher made the first cellphone in 1973. The first GPS satellite launched in 1978]
• The piano or the guitar? [The earliest guitar goes back to the 16th century. The piano was invented around 1700]
• Sudoku or the Crossword puzzle? [The first crossword puzzle appeared in 1913. The first modern game of Sudoku was published in 1979]
• Netflix or Google? [Netflix was founded in 1997. Google started searching in 1998]
• Contact lenses or the Escalator? [Contact lenses (made entirely of glass) were invented in 1897. Four years later, the Escalator debuted]
• Matches or Lighters? [Surprise! The first lighter was invented in 1823. Matches showed up in 1826]
• The Toothbrush or Toothpaste? [Egyptians used paste to clean their teeth in 5000 BC. Toothbrushing tools date back to about 3500 BC]
• Barbie or G.I. Joe? [Barbie debuted in 1959, while GI Joe reported for duty in 1964]
-HubPages, ReadersDigest
BS PHONE STARTER:
You’ve got 30 minutes to spend $10,000 in one store. Where are you going?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
57% of men have had the same one of THESE since childhood. What is it?
Answer: A best friend
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Look to the future – because that’s where you’ll spend the rest of your life.