The Bull Sheet

August 2 2018

Thursday, August 2, 2018 Edition #6268

Bully For You!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ It looks like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s stunt double will have a sweet ride to his doctor’s appointments in the future. Johnson surprised his stunt double and cousin, Tanoai Reed, for all his hard work and physical suffering, with a new custom truck. The exchange that was shared in a video on Johnson’s Instagram page. Johnson wrote: “SURPRISE! I love handing over keys. I love you brother and enjoy your new truck!” He also mentioned that Reed has suffered multiple broken bones, severed tendons and torn ligaments in achieving several ‘Stuntman of the Year’ honors over the years.
-MSN
★ When it comes to her movie career, UFC legend Ronda Rousey is aiming high — and wants a very specific role if Quentin Tarantino goes forward with a 3rd installment of “Kill Bill.” Rousey says she wants to play a “grown-up B.B. in ‘Kill Bill 3.'” B.B. was Beatrix Kiddo (Uma Thurman)’s daughter in the original movies. Tarantino has talked about possibly making a 3rd “Kill Bill” but there’s nothing in the works…. at least, not yet.
-TMZ
★ Kelsey Grammer has confirmed reports that he’s making plans to return to TV as the quirky psychiatrist “Frasier”. Grammer, who portrayed Dr. Frasier Crane in the hit sitcom from 1993 to 2004, wants to take the character to a new setting. He says: “We have wondered where he might be…he left for Chicago in the last episode of the show. He left to go be with his lady love, who probably didn’t stay with him but, you know, some evolution has taken place.” It’s not yet known if former co-stars Jane Leeves, David Hyde Pierce, and Peri Gilpin will be involved. John Mahoney, who played Frasier’s dad, died in February, at 77.
-Canoe
★ Reports are that “24″ is set to return to the small screen with a new prequel series. The original show ran for eight seasons, before returning for a reboot in 2014 under the name “Live Another Day”. The spin-off, “Legacy”, was cancelled after just one season last year. The new prequel series will feature Jack Bauer as the central character, but it is not believed that Keifer Sutherland will be involved. “24″ creators Joel Surnow and Robert Cochran are on board to helm the new season, which is still in the very early stages of development.
-NME
★ Alan Alda says that he’s been living with Parkinson’s disease, but he wants people to know that he’s doing great and there’s no need to be sad. The “M*A*S*H” star appeared on “CBS This Morning” and said he was diagnosed with the disease three and a half years ago. Alda says that since then, he has lived a full life. The 82-year-old says he’s been extremely active and is in great spirits while dealing with his health.
-TheBlast

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Bret Baier, Courtney Barnett
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Ray Romano, Lauren Miller, Leon Bridges
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Chloe Grace Moretz, Bobcat Goldthwait
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Ewan McGregor, Ann Dowd, Taylor Gordon
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Sean “Diddy” Combs, Ashton Kutcher, BTS ( R )
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Jodie Foster, Flula Borg, Neko Case ( R )
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Reza Farahan, Mercedes Javid
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Ewan McGregor
• “The Talk” (CBS): Brad Garrett, Piers Morgan, guest co-host Kate Jackson
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Kate McKinnon, Jerry O’Connell, guest co-host Lisa Rinna
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Mila Kunis, Kate McKinnon, Jenna Fischer, Oliver Hudson, Camila Cabello ( R )
• “The Four” (FOX): Season 2 finale
• “The Gong Show” (ABC): Celebrity judges Rob Riggle, Ken Jeong, Kristen Schaal praise, critique and gong unusually talented and unique performers.
• “Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team” (CMT): Four hundred nervous and excited ladies flock to AT&T Stadium to try out for the best cheerleading squad in the world.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Jennifer Lopez – will be honored at the 2018 MTV Video Music Awards. She will receive the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award on Aug. 20 at Radio City Music Hall in New York City. Lopez, who last performed at the VMAs in 2001, will also perform at the show.
• Demi Lovato – is still “very, very ill” in hospital following her overdose last week. She is said to be experiencing medical complications, and suffering extreme nausea and a high fever. A source says she is still expected to make a full recovery.
• Def Leppard – is releasing a line of sneakers with designs dedicated to some of their albums along with their logo. The limited-edition footwear features a “chunky sole” which taps into what was fashionable in the 80s and 90s. How much? $275 per pair. ‘Box sets’ with all four designs also available. (When you’re ‘def’, aren’t ALL shoes ‘sneakers’?)
• The Rolling Stones – have curated an album of music that’s inspired them. “Confessin’ the Blues” features some of blues music’s most influential stars, including John Lee Hooker, Chuck Berry, and Keith Richard’s favorite, Muddy Waters. It comes out Nov. 9 and 10% of the money goes to Willie Dixon’s Blues Heaven Foundation.
• Culture Club – Boy George and Co. have released their first new single in almost 20 years. They reformed most recently in 2014, and dropped ‘Let Somebody Love You’ on Tuesday. A new album, “LIFE”, comes out October 26.
• Billy Talent – The Canadian rockers will host a benefit concert Aug. 11in Toronto to support the victims of the city’s deadly shooting. They’ll join City and Colour and others to play the ‘Toronto Together’ fundraiser at Danforth Music Hall, steps away from where the July 22 shooting occurred, which killed 2 and left 13 injured.
• Florida Georgia Line – Their collaboration with Bebe Rexha, ‘Meant to Be’, has set a record for most weeks at number one on the Billboard Hot Country songs chart, with 35. The previous record holder was Sam Hunt’s ‘Body Like a Back Road’.
• Reba McEntire – will be the first recipient of the ‘Career Maker Award’, which she will be presented with at the 2018 Nashville Songwriters Hall of Fame Gala Oct. 28. McEntire will be awarded for her support of the Nashville songwriting community.

A PRETTY MICE DEVELOPMENT:
Scientists say that they have come one step closer to creating a drug that can reverse signs of aging, including hair loss. Researchers at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine used an experimental compound to undo damage in mice linked to a diet high in fat and cholesterol. That’s right, they figure that a lot of the things that we associate with aging, think baldness, grey hair and wrinkles, actually have a lot to do with poor diet. In an experiment, mice given a diet high in fat and cholesterol were more likely to see their hair turn from black to white and experience hair loss. The diet also appeared to cause inflammation of the skin. After consuming the new compound, their skin and hair returned to its previous state. That’s right. Hair returned, grey hair turned black again, and wrinkles and skin lesions disappeared! Will gray hair soon be a thing of the past? Not just yet, but the research brings us a step closer to drugs that treat hair loss and skin wounds.
(How does that stuff work on chest hair? Asking for a friend…)
(Might as well start adding that stuff to cheeseburgers right now!)
(I’m not totally clear on how this works. If I get my hair back, will my shower drain also unclog?)
-Newsweek

KIDZILLA:
From the department of what Mom’s already knew, comes this startling revelation: Children are most misbehaved when they are with their Mothers. And you’ve seen it. Strangers compliment you on what a well-behaved little boy you have. The company cannot believe that your little angel can sit through a three-course meal and behave like a proper lady. Then you are alone with him or her and it’s demon time! Child psychologist Dr. Heather Wittenberg agrees. She says that children are their ‘true selves’ with parents, specifically Moms. It takes energy to ‘be good’ and follow the rules—especially for young children—so when they get home, they let it all hang out. The good news is that they also save their deepest love and affection for Mom as well.
(And based on history, they save their worst diaper incidents for Mom too!)
(Let’s see…act all nice and polite in public, then blow off steam at home…where could they possibly have learned that?)
-Homemaking

DIRTY TRICKS:
There’s a new scam going around the internet…or at least an old scam with a new twist. People have been receiving emails from someone claiming to be a hacker who broke into their computer. The sender of the email claims to have video taken from the recipient’s computer showing that person either viewing inappropriate content, or actually participating in activity that most people would prefer never be seen by others. The threat is that either the person pays a bribe, or the video will be sent to all of their contacts. This sort of extortion attempt isn’t really new, but a wave of messages that began popping up in mid-July has stepped things up by showing passwords in the subject headers as attention-grabbing “proof” that someone has accessed their computer and has personal information. So where did the crooks get the passwords? After years of database breaches from sites like Yahoo, eBay, Sony PlayStation and more, there is lots of data like that floating around the internet, often for sale on the black market. That data is now being melded into traditional phishing scams. In many cases, recipients are reporting that the ‘passwords’ included as part of the scam are several years old and no longer in use.
(So in this case, a better password than “Password” wouldn’t have helped?)
(C’mon! It’s not a good scam until someone comes up with a cool name for it!)
(And if you have that kind of content…oh never mind. I’d better not say it…)
-NYTimes

THE HIGHEST-PAYING JOBS IN CANADA:
1. Specialist physicians – Hourly wages: $70.00 (But they do have to interrupt their golf games sometimes…)
2. Financial managers – $65.15 (is it weird that a financial manager couldn’t manage himself to the top of the list?)
3. Chemical engineers – $59.00 (What is it these guys do again?)
4. Lawyers – $57.05 (So how is it that mine charges $250 per hour?)
5. Statistical officers – $46.80 (Of course, they could tell you whatever they want!)
6. Mining supervisors – $46.70
7. Petroleum supervisors – $44.35
8. Pipefitting contractors and supervisors – $44.20
9. Producers, directors and choreographers – $37.05 (Not radio producers!)
10. Real estate agents – $35.00 (Judging by the car he drives, my real estate agent must have scored an INCREDIBLE inheritance….)
(Moral of the story? Become a CEO!)
-StatsCan, MTLBlog

BS CHRONOMETER 08.02.18

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1964 [54] Mary-Louise Parker, Fort Jackson SC, movie actress (“RED” films, “Fried Green Tomatoes”)/TV actress (“Weeds” 2005-12, “The West Wing” 2001-06)

1970 [48] Kevin Smith, Red Bank NJ, filmmaker/actor (“Clerks”, “Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back”), TV producer (“Comic Book Men” 2012-2017)

1976 [42] Sam Worthington, Godalming UK [raised Perth, Australia], movie actor (“Avatar”, “Clash Of the Titans”) COMING UP…”Avatar 2″ 2020

1977 [41] Edward Furlong, Glendale, CA, movie actor (“Terminator 2: Judgement Day”, “Pet Sematary Two”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Ice Cream Sandwich Day”, celebrating the chilly goodness of stuffing ice cream between a couple of wafers. Stone cold brilliant!

• “Dinosaurs Day”, enthusiasts dig up bones and dig through drawings of prehistoric creatures on this historical holiday. Here are a few dinosaur films to unearth on Dinosaurs Day: “Baby: Secret of the Lost Legend”, “Dinosaur”, “The Flintstones”, “Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs”, “Journey to the Center of the Earth”, “Jurassic Park”, “King Kong, The Land Before Time”, “Land of the Lost”, “The Land That Time Forgot” and “We’re Back – A Dinosaur’s Story”.

• “Coloring Book Day”, spend some time coloring with your friends, children or grandchildren or by yourself…try to stay inside the lines!

• “Take A Penny/Leave A Penny Day”, unless you’re in Canada.

• “IPA Day”, India Pale Ale beers date back to the late 18th century, when these ales were brewed for British sailors making long sea voyages to India. Most beers didn’t keep well on board ship, but London brewer George Hodgson was one of the first to develop a pale ale with a high hop content, which kept its taste better.

COMING UP . . .
[Fri] Airplane Crop Duster Day
[Fri] Watermelon Day
[Sat] Chocolate Chip Cookie Day
[Sat] U.S. Coast Guard Day

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1993 [25] the single “I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles)” by The Proclaimers is certified Gold

1998 [20] The Beatles top a poll by UK music magazine “Mojo” on ‘Favorite Recording Artist Of All-Time’, beating out Elvis Presley, Frank Sinatra, Queen, and Elton John, in that order

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1938 [80] Brooklyn introduces the 1st (and last) yellow baseball used in an official MLB game (Johnny Mize becomes only player to hit a home run with the off-color ball as the Dodgers beat St. Louis 6-2)

TODAY’S LAST . . .
2017 [01] At age 96, Great Britain’s Prince Philip makes his final solo public appearance before retiring from public engagements

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1975 [43] Distance record for ‘Champagne Cork Popping’ of 103 feet (31.4 m) is set by Gary Mahan of La Habra Heights, California

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
✓ Statistically, you are most likely to die in January, least likely in August.
✓ Sitting for more than three hours a day can cut two years off a person’s life expectancy.
✓ People who read books live an average of almost 2 years longer than those who do not read at all.
✓ Joggers live, on average, six years longer than non-joggers.
✓ The lifespan of a rock star is 25 years shorter than average.
✓ Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.
-FactSlides

BS THINGS THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN USEFUL TO LEARN IN SCHOOL:
✓ How to cancel plans and shake off friends.
✓ How to leave group messages politely.
✓ How to interrupt people smoothly.
✓ How to tell when someone has a massive crush on you.
✓ How to send the perfect flirty text.
✓ How to fill awkward silences.
✓ How to dress ‘smart casual’.
✓ How to network.
✓ How to be tired at the time you’re meant to go to sleep.
✓ How to craft the perfect comeback.
✓ How to get cats you meet on the street to like you.
✓ How to adult.
– Adapted from BuzzFeed.com

BS THINGS NOT TO SAY AT THE GYM:
• Could someone lift these weights for me? They’re heavy.
• I got my stomach by doing as many crunches as I can everyday. Usually either Nestle or Captain.
• Does this treadmill make me look fat?
• Can you point me to the Kegel machine please?
• Where is the ashtray?
• Wow. I just did 30 minutes on the escalator.
• Your butt looks amazing through these binoculars!
• You don’t sweat much for a fat guy.
• If they are immediately available to use, why do they call them weights?
• How YOU doin’?
-Twitter
(First published in BS in 2017)

BS PHONE STARTER:
What was ruined for you when it became popular? Fortnite? Vans? Social Media? A band?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
The only time the word ‘incorrectly’ isn’t spelled incorrectly is when it is spelled incorrectly.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: In a survey, more than 25% of women say they have tried to lose weight by doing THIS. What is it?
Answer: Eating baby food!

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Things you can measure don’t always count and things you can’t measure often do.

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