Tuesday, August 30, 2022 – Edition: #7300

100% Grade A Bull!

BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
The Bull Sheet will not be publishing on Monday, September 5 to observe the Labour Day holiday. All subscribers will receive credit for the non-service day. The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Tuesday September 6th.

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ “The Sopranos” actor and Broadway legend Robert “Bob” LuPone has died. The Tony-nominated actor passed following a 3-year battle with pancreatic cancer, according to his rep. The MCC Theater, an off-Broadway space LuPone founded, released a statement, saying he “lived fearlessly and with great curiosity, good humor, a boundless passion for connection, and a whole lot of heart.” Sopranos fans will remember his work as ‘Dr. Bruce Cusamano’ — the family physician and next-door neighbor to ‘Tony’. He also starred in “Sex and the City,” “Guiding Light,” and “All My Children,” for which he got a Daytime Emmy nom. He was 76.
-TMZ
★ With “Bring It On” having celebrated its 22nd anniversary last week, one of the film’s stars is sharing an idea for a potential sequel to the beloved cheerleader comedy. While the film spawned 6 direct-to-video sequels, none of them featured any original castmembers. Gabrielle Union, who played ‘Isis’, head cheerleader for the East Compton Clovers, took to Twitter with her concept, sharing a story about the anniversary for the original film, and writing: “Hmmm so Isis might have a teenager (now)”, alongside a series of “thinking” emojis. If Union’s idea does come to fruition, producers of a new Bring It On movie should have no problem casting it; actresses Chloe Bailey and Ryan Destiny both responded to say they’re ready to sign on. No word yet from Kirsten Dunst.
-ETCanada
★ Get ready to get weird — The first trailer for “Weird: The Al Yankovic Story” dropped yesterday. And in true Weird Al fashion, the Daniel Radcliffe-led film looks to offer a unique take on the biopic genre. In it, Radcliffe’s Yankovic says: “I’m tired of people thinking I’m some kind of joke, before confessing his lifelong dream to his friends: “My whole life, all I’ve wanted, is to make up new words to a song that already exists.” From there, we see the Yankovic begin to craft ‘My Bologna’, his 1983 parody of The Knack’s hit ‘My Sharona’. Soon, crowds are cheering Yankovic on and Madonna (played by Evan Rachel Wood) shows up at his mansion to ask if he plans to do a parody of ‘Like a Virgin’, before telling him the song is autobiographical “except for the fact that I’ve had a lot of sex.” The movie’s tagline? “Discover the icon who changed music — literally.” LINK: https://youtu.be/oCPMK8FUVCk 
-People
★ Is the high cost of movie tickets just not in your budget these days? Well, set up a reminder for this Saturday (if you’re in the US), because for one day, movie tickets will be just $3 in the vast majority of American theaters as part of the newly launched “National Cinema Day”. The Cinema Foundation, a non-profit arm of the National Association of Theater Owners, says that Sept. 3 will be a nationwide discount day in more than 3,000 theaters and on more than 30,000 screens. Major chains and all major film studios are participating.
-AP

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Ashton Kutcher, Amandla Stenberg, Jessie Reyez performs, guest host David Alan Grier (R)
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Megan Thee Stallion, Natalia Dyer, Montell Fish (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Colman Domingo, James Taylor (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Bob Odenkirk, Bobby Moynihan, Derrick Wright (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Guy Fieri, Kirby Howell-Baptiste, Sabrina Carpenter
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Karine Jean-Pierre, Nathan Lane, guest co-host Alyssa Farah Griffin (R)
• “The Talk” (CBS): Jodie Sweetin (R)
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Rainn Wilson, Anika Noni Rose, Max Frost
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Kate McKinnon (R)
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Benedict Cumberbatch, Elizabeth Olsen, Xochitl Gomez, Benedict Wong (R)
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Mason Gooding, Dylan Minnette, Jasmin Savoy Brown, Sonia Ammar, Mikey Madison (R)
• “Celebrity Wheel of Fortune” (ABC): Von Miller, Ali Wentworth and Laverne Cox
• “America’s Got Talent” (NBC): Eleven performers take the stage live from the Pasadena Civic Auditorium
• “Pawn Stars” (HISTORY): Season 21 premiere

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Lady Gaga – has gotten in on the latest TikTok trend, the “Teenage Dirtbag Challenge”. Playing a sped-up version of ‘Teenage Dirtbag’ by Wheatus, users post pics of them from when they were their most “dirtbag-y” selves, usually from their teens or early 20s. Her version of the challenge features photos from her days on the New York City club scene. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2p9836px
• Halsey – Following her headlining appearance at The Leeds Festival, they revealed they were dealing with a bout of “terrible food poisoning.” In an Instagram Story shared moments after their performance, Halsey said: “I have no idea how I’m still alive after my Leeds set. I have terrible food poisoning STILL!” LINK:  https://tinyurl.com/4vsj3v4b
• Pink Floyd – are rumored to be considering selling their music catalogue – and it could go for a pretty penny. Reportedly, a number of potential buyers have expressed interest, and experts say a deal could be coming soon for as much as $500 million.
• Ozzy Osbourne – has opened up about his decision to relocate from LA to the UK. The 73-year-old says he was “fed up” with the number of mass shootings in the USA. He also said he doesn’t want to die in the US, and be among the many stars buried at LA’s Forest Lawn Memorial Park.
• David Bowie – A new “Moonage Daydream” remix of ‘Modern Love’ has been released. It comes from the soundtrack to the documentary of the same name, which drops Sept. 16. The album will be released digitally Sept. 16, with a 2-CD edition out Nov. 18 and a 3-LP set in 2023. LINK: https://youtu.be/7O5bAAkJ0vU
• Kendell Marvel and Chris Stapleton – Friday, the longtime friends and collaborators dropped their new song ‘Don’t Tell Me How to Drink’. The barroom anthem will appear on Marvel’s album “Come on Sunshine”, out Sept. 23. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/tf4udb7e
• Zac Brown – Friday, he kicked a disruptive fan out of his show in Camden NJ. The Zac Brown Band frontman halted the show during a performance of ‘Chicken Fried’ to call for a concertgoer in the front row to be removed due to some poor behavior towards another fan. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/49pmvxuw
• Alan Jackson – was forced to cancel his scheduled Sat. night concert in Kansas City, Missouri, after testing positive for COVID-19. Organizers say the date will be rescheduled. Jackson’s next scheduled concert is on Sept. 9 in Lexington, Kentucky.

SHOOTING THE BULL

THE GRASS IS NOT ALWAYS GREENER:
I love this idea. Residents of Sweden’s largest island have been competing to determine who has the ugliest lawn. The contest is an effort by the municipality of Gotland to promote water conservation. After the island, saw a record-breaking number of visitors last summer, local politicians realized drastic changes were needed to save its water supplies, so the ugliest lawn contest was created to remind islanders not to waste water, and to talk about ways they can adapt their yards. The winner? Marcus Norström, whose yard was playfully described by the judges as “a really lousy lawn that lives up to all our expectations of Gotland’s ugliest lawn.” They pointed out that the prize-winning yard demonstrates “meritorious laziness” and “great care for our common groundwater.” Norström’s reward for his lack of effort is a visit from gardener and judge Sara Gistedt, who will offer personalized advice on what plants to grow in place of grass in the future.
(However, a group of local dogs is said to be organizing a protest…)
(Have you ever heard about something, and felt as though you’ve finally found your true calling? This!)
-Guardian

THE EAT BEAT:
➢ Oscar Mayer, famous for hot dogs, has introduced the “Cold Dog”, a foray into the land of frozen pops — that is flavored like an Oscar Mayer wiener. Yes, you heard that right — it’s a hot dog ice pop. The company describes it as the “first-of-its kind”, and we’re pretty sure they’re right. For the Cold Dogs, Oscar Mayer has teamed up with Popbar, a frozen desserts company that boasts innovations such as the waffle bar and hot chocolate on a stick. They say the Cold Dog is refreshing and boasts the trademark smoky umami notes of Oscar Mayer’s iconic wiener, and is topped with a signature squiggle of “mustard.” The new product is part of Oscar Mayer’s “Stupid or Genius” campaign, focusing on “the wonderfully odd ways to enjoy the iconic wiener beyond grilling.” (Yeah, there’s probably a reason this is a “first of its kind”!) LINK: https://www.instagram.com/p/CfXCmo3lmwy/
➢ Lays, the world’s bestselling potato chip brand, has launched a limited-edition mini washing machine…for oily fingertips. All you have to do is press the on button, put your oily fingertip into the machine through the laundry door and wait for the magic. Although not as advanced as a full-sized washing machine, it features a clever induction system that sprays atomized alcohol when it detects your fingertip. The alcohol comes from a refillable tank at the bottom of the mini washing machine. The Lays fingertip washing machine measures 15x11cm, and is charged using a USB port. (I was gonna say we have no need for this, but there was no need for me to eat that entire bag of Lay’s, either!) LINK: https://tinyurl.com/5dnd7t22
-Today, OddityCentral

SPENDER’S REMORSE:
Supposedly, you should never keep a secret from your partner, but a surprising new bit of research says that hiding a few small purchases from your significant other may actually benefit the relationship. The research team, including scientists from a number of American universities, found that guilt stemming from “secret consumer behavior” often prompts people to invest more in their relationship to compensate. While they definitely aren’t suggesting you go out and secretly buy a new car or timeshare condo, it may not be a bad idea to have a stash of candy hidden away, or order up a few new items for your fall wardrobe if you notice they are on sale. The researchers found that 90% of people have recently kept some consumer behaviors a secret from someone close to them — like a friend or spouse. The most common secretly purchased products? Food or drink (40%), followed by clothing, jewelry, or a hobby (10%), a gift or donation (8%), and a health, beauty, or wellness product (6.3%).
(They should have also asked if people know EXACTLY where their partner hides their secret candy. ‘Cause we do!)
(The only spending I’ve ever kept secret from my wife involved a radar gun and a cop who wouldn’t let me off the hook!)
-StudyFinds

WACKY WEATHER WORDS:
Tired of your typical weather terms, like “scattered showers” or “hot and humid”? Try working one of these into your next weather conversation (or forecast!)…
☞ Frog strangler:  This goes back to the 1870s, and refers to a heavy downpour…apparently capable of drowning frogs. Also acceptable: ‘frog choker’, ‘frog drowner’, or substitute the word ‘toad’ for extra oomph.
☞ Gorilla hail:  Coined by Extreme Meteorologist Reed Timmer during a Texas storm in 2020. It means just what you think it means – huge hail.
☞ Monkey’s wedding: Also known as a sunshower. Legends vary, but rats, bears, jackals and tigers have also been accused of arranging nuptials in this type of conditions.
☞ Turkey Towers: Storm chaser slang for clouds that rapidly build upwards, exhibiting a turkeylike “neck.”
☞ Microburst:  When a surge of rain falls out of a thunderstorm and hits the ground, and pushes outward into a foot shape.
☞ Sting jet:  A small area of intense winds that can cause extensive wind damage. The formation looks like a bee’s stinger or scorpion’s tail on weather maps. (What? No bees? No airplanes?)
☞ Bear’s cage:  The area of a tornado where the view is literally blocked from view by rotating walls of rain or hail.
☞ Suck zone:  The point basically when a twister literally sucks you up. (That’s not the technical term for it, obviously…)
-UPI

DID YOU KNOW?
Arizona State University recently announced the name of the new multi-purpose facility that will temporarily host the NHL’s Phoenix Coyotes, and it sounds like the type of place that could host a real party – in the back. The “Mullett Arena” is named in recognition of Donald and Barbara Mullett, who have been strong advocates for the growth of hockey in the state. The Coyotes are set to play their first game at Mullett Arena on October 28, when they host the Winnipeg Jets. (It’s either the coolest – or UNcoolest arena name in the league!)
-Yahoo

BS CHRONOMETER 08.30.22

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Slinky Day”, the Slinky was designed in the 1940s. The inventor had accidentally knocked a spring off the shelf, and watched it ‘walk’ down a series of books, to a tabletop, and then to the floor where it neatly coiled itself. (After all that, there really wasn’t much left to invent, was there?)
• “Holistic Pet Day”, initiated by the Animal Miracle Foundation to encourage pet owners to develop a healthy lifestyle for their pets through diet, exercise, and environment.
• “Touch-A-Heart Tuesday”, take the opportunity to show your love toward others. Just like the old 60’s tune goes “Put a little love in your heart”. After all, love is eternal and a little bit of love goes a long way. It’s a part of “Be Kind to Humankind Week”. LINK: https://bk2hk.org/week/
• “International Day of the Disappeared”, to draw attention to the fate of those imprisoned under poor conditions and at places unknown to their relatives and/or legal representatives.
• “Frankenstein Day”, honoring Mary Shelley, the author of “Frankenstein”. She was born on this day in 1797. The novel was first published anonymously in 1818. (By the way, in the book, ‘Frankenstein’ is the guy who created the monster, not the actual monster…)
• “Beach Day”, celebrating everything BEACH…parties, family, friends, great food, photography, beach must-haves and most importantly, encouraging clean-up of beaches today to help save the lives of sea birds & ocean mammals.
• “Toasted Marshmallow Day”, celebrating that great Summer treat on a stick. So, how do you like yours done? LINK: https://tinyurl.com/w8f35un4
WHAT YOUR TOASTED MARSHMALLOW SAYS ABOUT YOU:
➠ Perfectly Browned On All Sides – You are an anal-retentive perfectionist, a nit-picker who will devote unreasonable amounts of time to ensure that every project is done ‘just so’.
➠ Blackened – You are a creative and high-strung latent pyromaniac who is seldom punctual, easily distracted, and has difficulty paying attention to detail.
➠ Crusty Outside, Gooey Inside – You are an overly-sensitive individual who detests any form of criticism and has trouble expressing innermost feelings. Rather than facing problems head-on, you waste time brooding about them.
➠ Slightly Tanned on One Side – You are a shy introvert who tends to underestimate the effort and time required to accomplish a task. You have an unreasonable fear of everyday things … fire, for instance.
➠ Raw – You are a lusty and likely overweight thrill-seeker who refuses to even consider the concept of delayed gratification. Rather than plan ahead, you want immediate satisfaction.

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Matchmaker Day
[Wed] Lend a Hand Wednesday
[Thurs] Pink Cadillac Day
[Fri] Bring Your Manners to Work Day
This Month is…Crayon Collection Month
This Month is…Professional Speakers Month

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1930 [92] Warren Buffett, Omaha NE, business magnate-investor (Chairman and CEO of Berkshire Hathaway)/one of the richest people in the world [net worth: $104 billion]/pledged to leave 99% of his fortune to philanthropic causes, primarily the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation

1948 [74] Lewis Black, Silver Spring MD, standup comedian/TV comedian (“The Daily Show” 1996-2020)

1963 [59] Michael Chiklis, Lowell MA, movie actor (“Rise of the Silver Surfer”, “Fantastic Four”)/TV actor (“No Ordinary Family” 2010-11, “The Shield” 2002-08)

1972 [50] Cameron Diaz, San Diego CA, movie actress (“There’s Something About Mary”, “Charlie’s Angels”, “Shrek” movies)

1982 [40] Andy Roddick, Austin TX, retired tennis pro (2003 US Open winner, formerly ranked #1 in the world)/married to model Brooklyn Decker since 2009

1989 [33] Bebe Rexha, Brooklyn NY, pop singer (w/ Florida Georgia Line -‘Meant to Be’, w/G-Easy -‘Me, Myself and I’)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2003 [19] Charles Bronson (“The Dirty Dozen”, “Death Wish”), dies at 81

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2015 [07] At the MTV Video Music Awards, Kanye West announces he will run for President in 2020. (He does.)

2020 [02] Lady Gaga is the big winner at MTV Video Music Awards, taking Artist of the Year, Song of the Year (her Ariana Grande collaboration ‘Rain On Me’) and the Tricon Award, formerly the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1999 [23] Oklahoma State University introduces ‘Super Fan-nies’, disposable diapers adorned with the football team’s logo

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1988 [34] Vicki Keith of Kingston, Ontario becomes first swimmer to conquer all 5 of North America’s Great Lakes

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ It’s estimated that the common housefly can have as many as half a billion bacteria on its body.
✓ When cut in half, a hailstone has rings like an onion.
✓ Lettuce is a member of the sunflower family.
✓ It is estimated that it takes 39,000 gallons (147,000 liters) of water to produce the average car.
✓ Fewer than 1% of all Google searches use the “I’m feeling lucky” button.
✓ When Montenegro became independent from Yugoslavia, its Internet domain name went from .yu to .me.
-BathroomReadersInstitute, FactSlides

Best of BS . . .
BS WAYS TO MAKE SCHOOL MORE APPEALING TO TEENS:
• In biology class, dissect the least popular student.
• Automatic ‘A’ in Spanish if you’ve ever eaten at Taco Bell.
• When handing out condoms, throw in a free motel room.
• Every day at 2pm . . . school-wide happy hour.
• 10 points extra credit for each body piercing.
• New curriculum: Reading, Writing, and Wrecking Stuff.
• Pass a test, win a dirt bike!
-First published in BS in 2013

BS BAD NAMES FOR CHEESES:
• Gouda ’Nuff
• Udderly Curdled
• Rat Bait
• Kraft Singles in Your Area
• Carl
• Holey Moldy
• Chocolate Ripple
• Roquefort Files
• Feta Up With You
• Who Cut The
• Chuck E
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019

BS WEB GOODIE:
Nice timing:  https://tinyurl.com/3x9k8fwh

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Drunk people, children and leggings always tell the truth.

BS PHONE STARTER:
What word or saying from the past do you think should come back?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  In a survey, adults were asked about their childhood dream job, and THIS career came in at #1. What is it?
Answer:  Teacher

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
The best way to love someone is not to change them, but to help them reveal the greatest version of themselves.