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BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
California’s Court of Appeal has denied 76-year-old director Roman Polanski’s bid to dismiss the 32-year-old underage sex case against him and now awaits a decision by the Swiss courts on his extradition to Los Angeles (bets he lives long enough for this to ever happen?) . . . Sports image consultants tell “Boston Herald” Tiger Woods could win public sympathy if his wife Elin Nordegren demands half of his $600-million-plus fortune, as it might be seen as ‘money-grubbing’ (maybe to guys, but to women it would be ‘payback’) . . . 31-year-old actress Rachel McAdams (“Sherlock Holmes”) is said to be hooking up with co-star Jude Law’s personal assistant, former model Ben Jackson (oh hon’, that’s dating ‘below the line’) . . . TMZ claims notes written by investigators who searched late actress Brittany Murphy’s home show they found large amounts of the anti-seizure medication Topamax, antidepressant Fluoxetine, anti-anxiety medication Ativan, pain-reliever Vicoprofen, and Propranolol, used to treat hypertension (we’re guessing some or all contributed to her death by ‘natural causes’) . . . “Entourage” co-stars Jamie-Lynn Sigler & Jerry Ferrara have reportedly ended their relationship after dating discreetly since earlier this year, according to “NY Daily News” (seems she no longer has a pet ‘Turtle’) . . . “Desperate Housewives” star Eva Longoria Parker has landed a deal to launch her own fragrance with Falic Fashion Group, ‘Eva by Eva Longoria’, which will launch in the Spring . . . And 28-year-old Paris Hilton tells “Hello!” magazine that she and boyfriend Doug Reinhardt are now regularly sharing their bed with a pig by the name of ‘Princess Pigelette’, a miniature teacup porker that’s ‘incredibly smart, lovable, really clean and litter-trained’ (actually, Reinhardt’s now sharing the sack with TWO pigs).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Colbert Report” (Comedy Central/CTV) – Snoop Dogg (“Malice N Wonderland”).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Carrie Underwood (“Play On”).
• “The 11th Annual A Home for the Holidays With Faith Hill” (CBS) – Celebrities present inspirational stories of adoption; Faith Hill performs.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Passion Pit (“Manners”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Darlene Love’s  annual bring-down-the-house performance of “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)”.
• “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Jonas Bros (“Lines, Vines & Trying Times”).
• “Oprah Winfrey Show” (syndicated/CTV) – Andrea Bocelli, Alicia Keys, Jennifer Hudson, Mary J Blige, Sugarland, and Tim McGraw perform and reveal their holiday traditions.
• “Tavis Smiley” (TBS) – Harry Connick Jr (“Your Songs”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Mary J Blige (“Stronger With Each Tear”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Carrie Underwood – Her publicist has confirmed that she & 29-year-old hockey player Mike Fisher (Ottawa Senators) are engaged. No wedding date has yet been set. The couple met in March 2008 when he went backstage at her Ottawa concert at Scotiabank Place.
• Radiohead – They’re heading back into the studio to record the follow-up to “In Rainbows” in January.
• Rolling Stones – Word has it they’re planning a tour in 2010 but may leave one member at home who’s reportedly been drinking a bit as of late. 62-year-old Ronnie Wood’s recent issues mean it would be difficult to get insurance for the tour.
• Sean Kingston – He’s appearing in PETA’s new anti-chaining dog awareness campaign, to discourage pet-owners from leaving their pets tethered outside. Kingston has a pup of his own, named ‘Sunshine’.
• Taylor Swift – She’s been named ‘Entertainer Of the Year’ by Associated Press.
• Toby Keith – He’s been selected as “Billboard” magazine’s ‘Top Country Artist Of the Decade’.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENING:
“Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Squeakuel” ( PG Animated Comedy ): In this follow-up to the 2007 film, ‘Alvin, Simon & Theodore’ put aside music superstardom to return to school, and are tasked with saving the school’s music program by winning the $25,000 prize in a battle of the bands. Voice cast includes Amy Poehler, Anna Faris, Christina Applegate, Jason Lee, Jesse McCartney, and Justin Long.
NET: http://www.munkyourself.com

COMING ATTRACTIONS:
A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “Cedar Rapids” – In this comedy debuting in 2011, 60-year-old Sigourney Weaver (“Avatar”) portrays a veteran teacher who consummates a relationship with a 35-year-old former student (Ed Helms of “The Office, “The Happening”) who was always ‘hot for teacher’ in elementary school. The teacher breaks it off when her former pupil gets too serious.
• “Toy Story 3” – The 2nd sequel to the animated blockbuster will be released on Imax 3D screens as part of its wide release next June 18th. Tom Hanks & Tim Allen return to voice the film’s stars, ‘Woody’ & ‘Buzz Lightyear’. The film’s screenplay is by “Little Miss Sunshine” writer Michael Arndt.
• “Unleaded” – This upcoming indie comedy centers around a guy who’s looking for a woman to reproduce since he’s facing a declining sperm count. For once it’s the male biological clock that’s ticking, ticking, ticking. Filming begins in April though no cast has yet been announced.
• “Vision Quest” – 17-year-old Taylor Lautner, who bulked up to play a werewolf in “The Twilight Saga: New Moon”, is in talks to star in a remake of this 1985 drama. He’d be playing a high school wrestling star striving for greatness. Taylor’s reportedly read the script and is stoked about it.

TOP GROSSING MOVIES OF 2009:
Ranked by worldwide box office, rounded off to the nearest million …
5. “Up” ($683 million).
4. “2012” ($714 million).
3. “Transformers: Revenge Of the Fallen” ($835 million).
2. “Ice Age: Dawn Of the Dinosaurs” ($884 million).
1. “Harry Potter & The Half-Blood Prince” ($929 million).
– “Box Office Mojo”

MOST REVERED SPORTS STREAKS:
A new listing of some of the athletic benchmarks that may never be topped …
• Quarterback Brett Favre’s 284 consecutive NFL starts, dating back to 1992.
• Byron Nelson’s 11 consecutive PGA Tour wins in 1947.
• Lance Armstrong’s 7 consecutive Tour de France victories, the final one in 2005.
• Joe DiMaggio’s 56-game MLB hitting streak in 1941.
• Cal Ripken’s 2,632 consecutive MLB games-played, stretching from 1982-1998.
• Wayne Gretzky’s 51 consecutive NHL games of scoring at least 1 point, beginning on opening night of the 1983-84 season.
• Jerry Rice’s 274 straight NFL games with at least 1 catch, from 1985-2004.
• The Philadelphia Flyers 35-game unbeaten streak during the 1979-80 NHL season.
• The LA Lakers’ 33 consecutive NBA wins in 1971-72.
• New Jersey Devil Martin Brodeur’s 1,032 games played by an NHL goaltender, including a record 104 career shutouts (as of this week).
– Adapted from “Sports Illustrated”.

BS BUZZWORDS:
New terms leaking into the lingo …
• ‘The Book-Off’ – To avoid unwanted conversation in public places by producing a paperback and reading intently or at least pretending to. (A similar move is to pretend to be texting.)
• ‘Manther’ – An older man who preys on younger women. (Formerly known as a ‘perv’.)
• ‘People Voice’ – The tone of voice used when talking to people other than friends. It is usually more high-pitched and cheerful than normal, and is often used by retail workers and those in the health-care industry. (“And how are we doing today? Can I help you with anything?”)

THUMBS DOWN:
A new University of Utah study finds that people who send text messages while driving are fully 6 times more likely to have an accident. The research adds to a mountain of evidence showing that texting or talking on the phone while driving is dangerous. The new study, done in a driving simulator, shows that drivers’ median reaction time increased by 30% when texting and by 9% when talking on the phone. (If you’re propelling 2 tons of machinery at speed – is it asking too much that you pay attention?)
– MSNBC

TOO STUPID FOR US TO MAKE UP:
• England – Tourist attraction York Dungeon is celebrating Christmas the old-fashioned way … outlawing it. Oliver Cromwell’s 1647 ban on the holiday is being reenacted with the burning of Christmas trees, the smashing of decorations, and the display of severed heads (not real ones) choking on mince pies. A dungeon spokesman explains that the traditions have been outlawed by Oliver Cromwell as ‘illegal demons of Catholic decadence’. (Merry bloody Christmas!)
– YorkPress.co.uk
• Florida – “Merry Christmas. You’re under arrest!” That’s the holiday greeting Boynton Beach cops had for a woman busted for obstructing an investigation. And the officers weren’t talking about the upcoming holiday … that’s actually the suspect’s name. ‘Merry Christmas’, who turns 45 on December 28th, has been given a ticket and ordered to return after Christmas. (When she’ll meet ‘Happy New Year’ … her new cell mate.)
– NYPost.com
• Germany – Air Berlin is allowing passengers to transport their Christmas trees for free this year. The airline is accepting trees up to 6-and-a-half feet (2-m) until Thursday, as long as customers notify the airline’s call center in advance. An airline rep says most of the demand comes from Germans who prefer not to be parted from their trees. (“I just can’t bear to leave fir!”)
– DailyTelegraph.com

EATING WEED:
Gourmet chefs are taking the art of cooking with marijuana to a … higher level. Marijuana leaves and/or buds are being placed in food processors and ground into green flour, which is then added to oil or butter and cooked slowly for a couple of days while the THC binds to the fat. After green flakes are strained out, the result is what’s called ‘cannabutter’. Just 2 teaspoons of the stuff can contain the amount of THC in an entire ounce of weed. While the pot-infused oils and butters have a bit of an earthy taste, the flavor can easily be masked with garlic or other herbs and spices. (After you eat something made from cannabutter, do you get the munchies?)
– Associated Press

HOW TO KEEP NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS:
• Ask yourself, “Why do I want to do this?” Understanding your motivation is one key to sticking with your goal.
• Create an environment that is conducive to success. For instance, you don’t have to workout in a gym. Home exercise or physical activities that are fun can be an option.
• Don’t pick things you can’t or are not willing to do. If you hate jogging, odds are you’ll eventually quit.
• Concentrate on one or two important things. Don’t take on too many challenges or you’ll just get frustrated.
• Encourage your partner or a friend to join in the challenge. It’ll provide encouragement for each of you to continue.
• Don’t forget to reward yourself for reaching each milestone.
– Adapted from “China Daily”.

DID YOU KNOW?
• Want to have a wild time at your Christmas party? Invite ‘Sarah’, ‘Becky’ and ‘Emma’. Those are the names of the ‘Wildest Christmas-Party Girls’, according to a survey of 4,000 male office employees by a vodka manufacturer.
– UPI
• Some 23 US states still permit drive-through liquor stores.
– Slate.com

BS CHRONOMETER 12.23.09

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TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1943 [66] Harry Shearer, LA CA, comedian/TV voice-over actor (numerous voices on “The Simpsons”)/movie actor (“This Is Spinal Tap”)

1964 [45] Eddie Vedder (Edward Louis Severson III), Evanston IL, alt-rock singer (“Hard Sun”, Pearl Jam- “Last Kiss”)

1967 [42] Carla Bruni-Sarkozy, Turin, Italy, singer/songwriter/former fashion model who became First Lady of France in 2008 by marrying French president Nicolas Sarkozy

1970 [39] Catriona LeMay-Doan, Saskatoon SK, Vancouver 2010 Winter Games analyst (CTV)/former speedskater (1998, 2002 Olympic champion-500 meters)/Order of Canada (2005)/Canadian Sports Hall of Fame (2005)

1978 [31] Estella Warren, Peterborough ON, movie actress (“Planet Of the Apes”, “The Cooler”)/fashion model (“Sports Illustrated”, “Vogue”, “Vanity Fair”)

TODAY’S BS REASON TO PARTY . . .
• “Noche de Rabano” (“Night Of the Radishes”) in Oaxaca (wah-HAH-kah), Mexico, when figurines are cleverly carved … from radishes. How festive!
NET: http://www.christmas-in-oaxaca.com/night-of-radish.htm

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2007 [02] Canadian jazz great Oscar Peterson dies in Mississauga ON at age 82

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1823 [186] “Account Of a Visit from St Nicholas” (better known as “Twas the Night Before Christmas”) by Clement C Moore is first published in the “Troy (NY) Sentinel”

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1986 [23] Dick Rutan & Jeana Yeager complete 24,986-mile ‘Non-Stop Around-the-World Flight’ (“Are we there yet? I gotta pee!”)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] Christmas Eve
[Fri] “It’s Complicated”; “Nine”; “Sherlock Holmes” open in movie theaters
[Sat] Kwanzaa begins
[Sat] Boxing Day (Australia, Canada, Germany, New Zealand, UK)
[Sat] Day of Goodwill (South Africa)
[Sat] Thank-You Note Day
[Sat] Whiner’s Day
This Week Is … Gluten-free Baking Week
This Month Is … Winter Month

BULL’S BITS

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MALL SANTA PET PEEVES:
• Kids who refuse to believe that’s fruitcake on your breath, not gin.
• When the last guy to use the beard leaves bits of his lunch in it.
• Even with the costume, people recognize you from “America’s Most Wanted”.
• Parents who get all uptight when you offer their kids a pinch of Skoal.
• Enduring the taunts of your old buddies from drama school.
• Two words … lap rash.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Before they made him they broke the mold.

BS PHONE STARTER:
How long should you be left on the tarmac in a stationary airplane before being allowed to disembark? (The US Transportation Department, responding to travelers’ horror stories, has just ordered airlines to let passengers stuck in stranded airplanes to deplane after 3 hours.)

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: Every year 2 billion of THESE are sold, mostly in December.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Candy canes.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.