Friday, December 1, 2006 Edition: #3421
Bully For You!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TONIGHT on “1 Versus 100″, hosted by Bob Saget (NBC), contestants will take on a ‘Mob’ that includes the cast of “Las Vegas” (NBC), plus Kevin Federline (who may be attacked by the mob) . . . SATURDAY the 29th annual “Kennedy Center Honors” for lifetime contribution to culture will be presented during a dinner hosted by US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice in Washington DC; then SUNDAY a gala salutes the 2006 honorees, including Dolly Parton, Smokey Robinson, Andrew Lloyd Webber, and Steven Spielberg (airs on CBS later THIS MONTH) . . . D-listers Erik Estrada, La Toya Jackson & Jack Osbourne are among the ‘celebs’ currently training as police officers in Muncie IN for an upcoming CBS-TV reality show (what, Rob & Amber weren’t available?) . . . Hollywood party girl Lindsay Lohan is reportedly attending AA meetings in Los Angeles in an attempt to turn her life around (maybe she should try ‘Bad Drivers Anonymous’ too) . . . After making a drunken appearance on “The View” WEDNESDAY, Danny DeVito (promoting his new movie “Deck the Halls”) is attempting to reach Barbara Walters to apologize (he slurred, swore, and even sat on Rosie O’Donnell’s lap) . . . “Numb3rs” (CBS) and “Everybody Hates Chris” (CW) have been named the best drama and best comedy at the annual “Family Television Awards”, which honors ‘family-friendly’ prime-time programs (hm, nothing for f-ing “Entourage” eh?) . . . Jessica Simpson-reject Nick Lachey is set to become part-owner of the Tacoma Rainiers, the Triple-A affiliate of the American League’s Seattle Mariners (because ball players still get groupies) . . . And, oops!, it seems “GQ” magazine’s holiday edition went off to the printing press just a little bit too early as it names the ‘Newlyweds of the Year’ as – Pamela Anderson & Kid Rock.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Buddy Jewell – The 1st winner of “Nashville Star” has pulled out of the 20-city “Great American Country Christmas Tour” after breaking his wrist while … hanging Christmas lights on his Nashville home. Ironic, no?
• Celine Dion – She’s cancelled 5 performances of her Las Vegas show “A New Day” and backed out of MONDAY’s “Billboard Music Awards” due to a ‘highly contagious respiratory infection’. You mean, she’s got a sore throat?
• George Strait – His album “It Just Comes Natural” has just received platinum certification for shipments of 1 million copies. That’s his 32nd album to do so!
• Gnarls Barkley – Their tour rider has several “Crazy” backstage demands written into it, including baked goods, a pack of white athletic socks, and a box of super-sized condoms.
• Sarah McLachlan – TONIGHT she guests on “Late Night With Conan O’ Brien” (NBC).
• Taylor Hicks – TONIGHT he performs on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel).
• Tenacious D – TOMORROW they’re the musical guest on “Saturday Night Live” (NBC), hosted by Matthew Fox (“Lost”).
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “The Nativity Story” ( PG Religious Drama ): Keisha Castle-Hughes (pregnant in real life and not yet 17), Shohreh Aghdashloo & Oscar Isaac star in this Biblical story of Mary and Joseph’s love, faith, and beliefs that are tested by her miraculous pregnancy and the birth of their son. Shot in Italy and Morocco.
NET: http://www.thenativitystory.com/
• “10 Items or Less” ( R-Rated Dramedy ): In this small indie film, Morgan Freeman stars as a fading actor who goes to Carson CA to research a potential role. There he meets a grocery store clerk (Paz Vega) whom he ends up needing to ask for a ride back home. Along the way a tentative friendship begins to develop.
NET: http://movies.go.com/10-items-or-less/d853382/drama
• “Turistas” ( R-Rated Horror Thriller ): Josh Duhamel (“Las Vegas”), Melissa George & Olivia Wilde play a group of backpackers stranded in a Brazilian beach town who are trapped by a military group and used to implement their mysterious agenda. Shot on location in Brazil (maybe explaining why Duhamel would take on a 3rd-rate horror flick.)
NET: http://movies.go.com/turistas/d844498/drama
• “Van Wilder 2: The Rise of Taj” ( R-Rated Comedy ): In this low-budget, filmed-in-Romania sequel to the 2002 film, ‘Taj Mahal Badalandabad’ (Kal Penn) leaves ‘Coolidge College’ behind for the halls of ‘Camford University’, where he looks to continue his education and teach an uptight student how to make the most out of his academic career. Co-stars Lauren Cohan and Daniel Percival. Not back from the original movie: Ryan Reynolds and Tara Reid.
NET: http://www.riseoftaj.com/
$2,500-A-DAY CALENDAR:
TODAY’s the day many kids kick off their Advent calendars, opening one compartment each day through DECEMBER 24th. Perhaps the most expensive Advent calendar ever has gone on sale at the UK’s upscale Harrods department store in London. Made from expensive walnut and burr elm wood and shaped like a Christmas tree, the keepsake’s 24 compartments each contain a treat fashioned from Green & Black’s gourmet chocolate. The price? Just under $60,000. In the spirit of the season, all proceeds from its sale go to a charity supporting cocoa farmers in Belize. (Where the Gross Domestic Product is also just slightly under $60,000.)
– “GQ”
USER UNFRIENDLY:
Some highlights from Stanford University research on Internet usage …
• Internet users average about 3-and-a-half hours online each day.
• 9% of regular users admit they attempt to conceal ‘non-essential Internet use’.
• 6% of respondents report that their relationships have suffered as a result of excessive use.
• 4% report they feel ‘preoccupied by the Internet’ … even when they aren’t online. (Whoa, you know you’re addicted when …)
– “Detroit News”
STEROIDS ON THE HOOF:
The 2008 Beijing Olympics are still 2 years away and already they’re coming up with excuses. The former head of the China Doping Control Center says so many steroids are pumped into the country’s farm animals that they could show up in drugs tests taken by Olympic athletes. Yang Shumin says the practice, which boosts the size of animals, could skew testing of all athletes, not just China’s. Earlier THIS YEAR, hundreds of people in Shanghai fell ill because of the quantities of anabolic steroids in pork they had eaten. (As a rule of thumb, if the steak you’re served has a ‘6-pack’ and shotputs the baked potato off your plate, it’s likely not safe to eat.)
– “China Daily”
BEST SCOTCH:
Who’s the most famous Scot of all-time? According to a new UK poll, these are the most notable …
3. Sean Connery
2. Robbie Burns
1. The Loch Ness Monster
– “Scottish Daily Record”
GAME PLAN:
Playing video games can improve hand-eye coordination, reaction time and brain speed, as well as help hospital patients forget about their pain, according to professor Mark Griffiths of Nottingham Trent University in England. Griffiths argues that if video games can be used to teach and improve skills such as driving and flying, it’s logical that they can be used to also help people learn coping and recovery skills. (“Here’s your prescription for antibiotics and an Xbox 360 …”)
– PA News
QUEENS OF THE CINEMA:
Hollywood’s highest-paid actresses of the past year, according to the 5th annual ‘Women in Entertainment Power 100′ to be published next TUESDAY …
5. Cameron Diaz (circa $15 million per movie)
4. Drew Barrymore (circa $15 million)
3. Renee Zellweger (circa $15 million)
2. Reese Witherspoon ($15 million-plus)
1. Nicole Kidman ($17 million)
– “Hollywood Reporter”
CANADIAN HOS:
About 10,000 Canada Post workers donate their time each year to answer Santa Claus letters from kids around-the-world. Last year, the postal elves received more than a million wish lists! The guy in the red suit’s address is: Santa Claus, North Pole, Canada H0H 0H0. And, of course, he’s also online to answer email …
NET: http://www.canadapost.ca/personal/dec/santa/writesanta/
INDOOR ENTHUSIASTS:
Overnight stays in America’s national parks have declined by 20% over the past 10 years. During that same time period, campground camping and back-country camping are down by 24%. The Outdoor Industry Association thinks that may be because many from the Baby Boomer generation love to paddle and rock-climb during the day, but they also want their Cabernet and almond-crusted salmon with asparagus by night … not to mention a comfortable bed. (When it comes to outdoor adventure these days, most of us want to be done before dinner.)
– UPI
SAVING UP SPACE:
Cornell University nutritional scientist Brian Wansink, author of the book “Mindless Eating: Why We Eat More Than We Think”, says the holiday season only comes around once a year so the last thing a person wants to do is adhere to a diet during the festivities. So how to avoid ballooning up by 10 lbs or more? Wansink suggests ‘banking’ calories by being especially vigilant about what you eat a week or two before any holiday. (For instance, to make up for mom’s plum pudding, you should have started ‘saving’ last February.)
– “Globe & Mail”
DID YOU KNOW?
Women born in DECEMBER live an average of 3 years longer than women born in AUGUST.
THE BULL SHEET 12.01.06
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1935 [71] Woody Allen (Allen Stewart Konigsberg), Brooklyn NY, film director/writer/actor (“Scoop”, “Match Point”)/2 Oscars (“Hannah & Her Sisters” 1987, “Annie Hall” 1978)
1945 [61] Bette Midler, Honolulu HI, pop singer (“Wind Beneath My Wings”)/movie actress (“The Stepford Wives”)
1977 [29] Brad Delson, Agoura CA, rock guitarist (Linkin Park-“Numb/Encore”, “In The End”)
SATURDAY –
TV anchor Stone Phillips (“Dateline: NBC”) is 52; Rock bassist Rick Savage (Def Leppard) is 46; Rock bassist Nate Mendel (Foo Fighters) is 38; Movie actress Lucy Liu (“Lucky Number Slevin”) is 38; Pop singer Nelly Furtado (“Say It Right”) is 28; Pop singer Britney Spears (K-Fed ex) is 25.
SUNDAY –
Rocker Ozzy Osbourne (Black Sabbath) is 58; Country bassist Paul Gregg (Restless Heart) is 52; TV actor Steven Culp (“Desperate Housewives”) is 51; Movie actress Daryl Hannah (“Kill Bill”) is 46; Movie actress Julianne Moore (“The Hours”) is 46; Movie actor Brendan Fraser (“The Mummy”) is 38; TV actress Holly Marie Combs (“Charmed”) is 33.
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Bifocals at the Monitor Day”, a day of lamentation for all those forced to tip their heads back open-mouthed in order to use a computer, thanks to their need for bifocal lenses. Gradually more and more of Canada’s 10 million Baby Boomers are suffering ‘presbyopia’ (Greek word for ‘aging eye’).
• “Let’s See What We Find In the Fridge Day”, a day to be brave and eat something from the back of the refrigerator. So what did you find?
• “Pie Day”, honoring the popular culinary creation as an ‘art form’.
• “St Eligius Day,” patron saint of farmers, miners, taxi drivers, veterinarians, jockeys and locksmiths.
• “World AIDS Day”, the 18th annual day of AIDS awareness and education, first declared by the UN’s World Health Organization in 1988. The UN estimates that 5 people worldwide die of AIDS every minute of every day. HIV has hit every corner of the globe, infecting more than 42 million men, women and children. The official symbol of “World AIDS Day” is the red ribbon. In some places, the occasion is observed as “Day Without Art”.
NET: http://www.worldaidsday.org
SATURDAY –
• “Fritters Day”, honoring the yummy treat made by frying up small cakes of dough in butter or oil.
• “Pan American Health Day”, saluting the Pan American Health Organization which works to improve health and living standards in all the countries of the Americas.
• “Play Basketball Day”, honoring the game invented in 1891 as a YMCA pastime that’s evolved into big biz where players get a bazillion bucks a bucket.
SUNDAY –
• “Coats for Kids Day”, a day to check your closets for unwanted outerwear and donate it to a local charity.
• “International Day of Disabled Persons”, sponsored by the United Nations.
• “Roof Over Your Head Day”, to draw attention to the plight of the homeless.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2003 [03] World premiere of the 3rd and final “Lord Of The Rings” movie, “The Return of the King”, in Wellington NZ
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1971 [35] John & Yoko Lennon’s “Happy Xmas (War is Over)” is released
1982 [24] Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” is released (now #2 all-time selling album at 26 million-plus copies)
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1913 [93] 1st ‘Drive-In Auto Service Station’ (Pittsburgh PA)
1929 [77] Game of ‘Bingo’ invented by Edwin Lowe (nowadays it’s a $5-billion-a-year charitable fundraiser)
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Mon] 2006 Billboard Music Awards (Las Vegas)
[Mon] Extraordinary Work Team Recognition Day
[Mon] Wear Brown Shoes Day
[Tues] Bathtub Party Day
[Tues] “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest” released on DVD
[Thurs] Grammy Awards nominees announced
This Week Is … Cookie Cutter Week
This month Is … Universal Human Rights Month
BULL’S BITS
BS BAND NAMES:
Before starting up a band, you should know that the following names are taken … honest!
• Mary Kay & the Cosmetics
• Phlegm Fatale
• Results of Inbreeding
• The Sphinctones
• Albino Toilet Boys
• Biff Hitler & the Violent Mood Swings
• The Boxing Ghandis
• Cottage Cheese From the Lips of Death
• Electric Prostates
• The Well Hungarians
BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s the all-time best sports movie? (According to an ESPN ranking, it’s “Bull Durham”, followed by “Rocky”, “Raging Bull”, “Hoosiers”, and “Slap Shot”.)
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I lost 20 pounds! Unfortunately, I was in England at the time.
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: THIS ranked #5 on an employee survey asking the ‘Most Embarrassing Things You Do at the Holiday Office Party’.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Participate in a line dance.
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
The bad news is time flies. The good news is … you’re the pilot.