The Bull Sheet

February 22 2023

Wednesday, February 22, 2023 – Edition: #7423

Get a Load of This Sheet!

 

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★Don’t believe everything you hear about Prince Harry and Meghan Markle. Less than a week after “South Park” poked fun at the royal couple on an episode titled “Worldwide Privacy Tour,” a report surfaced claiming the Duchess of Sussex was “upset and overwhelmed” with the show. A royal commentator even suggested the episode could bring on a lawsuit. But on Tuesday, a spokesperson for Harry and Meghan slammed any speculation that the couple is considering taking legal action against South Park, saying: “It’s all frankly nonsense. Totally baseless, boring reports.” The show revolved around how Meghan and Harry have been vocal about wanting privacy, but have been in the public eye thanks to their Netflix docuseries “Harry & Meghan”, and the episode references Harry’s memoir “Spare”, calling it “Waaaah.”
-E!, PopCulture
★ Move over, Nick Cannon — you may have competition. Jude Law just might now be a father of 7. He has sparked rumors that he secretly welcomed another child with his wife, Phillipa Coan. Photos published Monday show Law and Coan making their way through Heathrow Airport in London. Coan is seen pushing one stroller holding the couple’s first child together, while Law’s buggy has another baby in it, leading to speculation that the Oscar nominee’s family recently grew. The 50-year-old announced in September 2020 that he had welcomed his first kid with Coan — and 6th overall.
-PageSix
★ Alec Baldwin is no longer facing years behind bars in connection to the fatal shooting of “Rust” cinematographer Halyna Hutchins. Prosecutors have dropped the firearms enhancement charge brought against him, according to a spokesperson for the DA. If Baldwin had been convicted of the involuntary manslaughter and firearms enhancement charges, he would have faced a mandatory 5 years in jail. The maximum time he now faces is 18 months.
-Fox
★ Megan Fox is publicly praising Sophie Lloyd after squashing rumors that Machine Gun Kelly cheated with the guitarist. After reactivating her Instagram, Fox commented on the “insanely talented” musician’s latest post, and wrote: “How me making a joke in order to absolve this girl of a hurtful accusation somehow turned into a confirmation of it — I will never understand.” She continued: “You have now been baptized by the flames of fame. It only gets worse from here unfortunately.” Fox sparked speculation last week that she and MGK were on the rocks with some cryptic Instagram posts.
-PageSix
★ Jansen Panettiere, an actor and Hayden Panettiere’s brother, has died at age 28. Sources close to the family said Jansen died Sunday at home in New York. His cause of death is unclear, but police say there was no foul play. Jansen Panettiere worked on early 2000s projects such as “Even Stevens,” “Blue’s Clues,” “Robots” and “Ice Age: The Meltdown.” He was Hayden’s only sibling, and the duo worked together on “Tiger Cruise” in 2004 and “Racing Stripes” in 2005.
-NYPost
★ Dick Van Dyke is set to celebrate his 98th birthday this year, and shows no signs of slowing down. The “Mary Poppins” legend — who recently wowed crowds with a performance on “The Masked Singer” — says there are 4 things that help him maintain his youthful vigor: First, he says he has good genes, secondly, quote: “Having a beautiful young wife half my age to take care of me [helps].” He’s been married to 51-year-old Arlene Silver for 11 years. Van Dyke also said that a “positive attitude” is key to keeping healthy, and lastly, he said exercise is important for people of all ages — but particularly for those in their older years. He goes to the gym 3 times a week.
-NYPost

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Keri Russell, Ms. Pat, Logic
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Michael B. Jordan, Hugh Dancy, Måneskin, Tom Morello (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Eugene Levy, Nas
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Colin Quinn, Gabrielle Union, Danny Carey (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Bryan Cranston, Sigourney Weaver, Quinn XCII (R)
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Iggy Azalea, James Kennedy
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Guy Fieri
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Daymond John, Alex Guarnaschelli
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Niall Horan, Kimberly Williams-Paisley, Mika Brzezinski
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Penn Badgley, John Oliver
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Janelle James, Capt. Sandy Yawn
• “Tough as Nails” (CBS): Season 4 finale. Savage Crew and Dirty Hands go head-to-head in the final battle; Plus, an individual race to demo and stack their way over shipping containers.
• “The Masked Singer” (Fox): Abba night
• “The Goldbergs” (ABC): After a month of seeing one another, Adam and Carmen discuss the status of their relationship; an old friend of Erica’s visits town.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Jonas Brothers — Kevin Jonas hilariously warned Joe Jonas to “chill out” after he revealed a sneak peek of the music video for ‘Wings’, and that it features “The White Lotus” star Haley Lu Richardson. Shortly after Joe posted the reel on Instagram, Kevin reacted: “What’s going on, man? You gotta, like, calm down. You’re, like, giving everything away again. We talked about this.” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yckvft9d
• BTS – Next month, LEGO stores in Singapore will be selling the “BTS Dynamite set”, featuring the K-poppers on the video set of their hit song ‘Dynamite’. The 749-piece kit will sell for the equivalent of US $120.
• Theory of a Deadman – It’s one of those “ironic” cover versions that makes you say: “Who thought of that?” The post-grunge outfit has dropped a preview song from its upcoming album “Dinosaur”, out March 17. It’s a cover of the classic 1981 Bill Withers/Grover Washington Jr. song ‘Just the Two of Us’, which was famously sampled by Will Smith in 1997. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/m7xz4jzh
• Ozzy Osbourne – Legendary former Whitesnake guitarist Steve Vai has revealed that he recorded an entire album with Ozzy in the 1990s, and it’s never been released. He was brought in to co-write one song during the making of “Ozzmosis”, and says “Ozzy and I got carried away.” Osbourne’s camp retains the rights to the recordings.
• Guns N’ Roses – has announced a massive 2023 world tour, headlining stadiums, festivals, and arenas throughout the summer and fall. It launches June 5 in Israel, and will continue across Europe, before hitting North America Aug. 5 in Moncton NB, and ending Oct. 16 in Vancouver. Pre-sales begin today, with general on-sales starting Friday.
• Jimmie Allen and Lainey Wilson – are among the artists partnering with Tractor Supply Co. for its “Emerging Artists Program”. Ashley McBryde, Dustin Lynch and Kat & Alex are also involved in the initiative, to discover and support up-and-coming country artists. Emerging artists can submit an original song to www.tractorsupply.com/emergingartists . Five will be selected to collab with a mentor.
• Jelly Roll – has announced the 44-date “Backroad Baptism Tour”. He unveiled the news via a comical Instagram post showing him contacting his new tourmates (Ashley McBride, Chase Rice and more) via FaceTime. The clip is a play on “Scary Movie” and the iconic “Wazzup” phone calls. LINK:  https://tinyurl.com/4s5v8wfs
• Wynonna Judd – Her next album could feature some of her touring companions. According to rumors, Trisha Yearwood and Brandi Carlile will appear on Judd’s upcoming solo project. She told Billboard: “We are working on a song and we don’t know if it will be on the record or not yet.”

SHOOTING THE BULL

FIVE SECOND RULE:
Scientists from New York University say it takes less than 5 seconds for people know if they really like a new song. And people’s opinions of a new tune didn’t change, whether they listen to a small snippet or the entire thing. The NYU team also discovered that people like a song more if they hear the whole thing before listening to just the excerpt (as opposed to the other way around). The researchers say their findings indicate that people respond more to the “general vibe” of a tune, rather than its musical notes, and, in general, “We can determine within five seconds or less whether or not we will like it.” That sort-of defeats the purpose of music services such as Apple and Amazon providing teasers in hopes that we’ll buy the song.
(Yeah, why buy the song, if we only need 5 seconds?)
(Don’t tell our Program Director – if he hears about this, it could change the way we do things around here immensely!)
(I can tell in 5 seconds if a song’s going to be a hit. If I hate it…it’s going to #1 with a bullet!)
-StudyFinds

ZUCK SUCKS:

Now that the Twitterverse is all freaked out about Elon Musk deciding to charge for a blue check mark, now Mark Zuckerberg has decided to get in on the action. The Meta CEO has announced a new paid subscription service for Facebook and Instagram, granting users a hallowed blue tick for a monthly fee. “Meta Verified” will cost you $11.99 a month on web and $14.99 a month on iOS. It’s launching in Australia and New Zealand this week, ahead of a wider rollout. Meta says the subscription will allow you to “verify your account with a government ID, get a blue badge, get extra impersonation protection against accounts claiming to be you, and get direct access to customer support.” The social media giant has laid off about 11,000 workers in recent months, part of a wider downturn among big tech companies.
(When you treat your users like this, it’s little wonder!)
(…by the way, all those “extra benefits” that come with Meta Verified are things that a social media site should provide to users, as a bare minimum!)
-Fox

EATING IN, AND OUT:

⇒ The secret to eating less may be all in how you plate it. Chinese scientists believe a hack to reduce food consumption, and thus lose weight, is to spread your food out on the plate. Their study found that cutting food into small pieces and scattering them across a dish can actually trick your brain into thinking you’re eating much more. Study participants were shown multiple photos of a chocolate bar, with the candy split between 9-16 pieces. The participants thought 16 pieces of chocolate was a larger portion than the 9-piece sample, leading the scientists to conclude that “More overall portion size is perceived when the units are separated than gathered.” (So, there’s no advantage to asking that my pizza be cut into 16 pieces, either?)
⇒ A restaurant in Tinton Falls NJ recently divided social media by announcing it will no longer be welcoming diners under 10 years old, beginning next month. Nettie’s House of Spaghetti detailed its plan in a Facebook post, saying that although “We love kids…Between noise levels, lack of space for high chairs, cleaning up crazy messes, and the liability of kids running around the restaurant, we have decided that it’s time to take control of the situation.” The social media post has been shared more than 10,000 times, and stirred quite an outcry from locals. But some were also supportive of the decision. One commenter wrote: “They need to change their name to something more pretentious, like…’Il Bistro di Netti.’ People were bringing kids because it’s named like a family place.” (Might want to get rid of the “play area”, too!)
-NYPost, Yahoo

BORING SPORTS:
I absolutely cannot understand how anyone could watch others playing golf…for fun. Or bowling, for that matter. The question “What is the most boring sport to watch?” was posed on AskReddit. Here’s what people said…
✗ “The first year when kids pitch in baseball. An entire game of strikeouts and walks. 100%.”
✗ “Rowing. I have been rowing competitively for years and I understand the nuances, yet it’s still the dullest thing in the world.”
✗ “Pro fencing is actually not very entertaining. They’re so fast that you have no idea what happened. It’s a couple of people with swords bouncing back and forth for about 30 seconds, SOMETHING happens, and then it’s over.”
✗ “Microsoft Excel World Championship. Not a joke, this (stuff) is real.”
✗ “Surfing. Hours of contestants just bobbing around the ocean and commentators trying their best to fill the gaps in action.”
✗ “Fishing. Just imagine having to sit through ALL of the filmed footage to put together what will be aired.”
✗ “A boxing or MMA fight with 2 defensive fighters. Nothing more boring than watching 2 people circle one another and actively avoid doing the one thing that everyone is paying to see them do.”
✗ “As a cyclist, cycling. It’s really cool to learn the technical parts and strategy…but I get bored watching people pedal for hours only for the real action to start a few miles from the finish line.”
✗ “As a huge Formula One fan, depending on where the race is, it’s even more boring than Nascar.”
✗ “Golf. I love it and love going in the weekends to play a round but for the life of me can’t stand watching it.”
✗ “Water polo. You can’t see what’s going on, just a lot of splashing and pretending to be dragged underwater.”
(Sorry, baseball, you didn’t make the cut…THIS time!)
-Wimp

DID YOU KNOW?
A recent study suggests that our human ancestors may have been able to hibernate. Looking at the fossils of humanlike ancestors found in Spain, archaeologists found weakened skeletal systems that are typically caused by wasting disease – only periodically, though, not consistently – and think the trade-off might have been seasonal survival. Modern humans don’t have the capability to either store enough nutrition, to burn enough fuel over time to keep our bodies working, or to expel waste safely while asleep to be able to hibernate. (…although I’m working on the part about “storing enough nutrition…!)
-DidYouKnowFacts

BS CHRONOMETER 02.22.23

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Ash Wednesday”, marking the first day of Lent in the Western Christian liturgical year. For the devout, it’s a season of spiritual discipline, cleansing, and fasting which occurs in the 40 days (excluding Sundays) before Easter. (So, what are you giving up for Lent? Cod liver oil?)
• “Be Humble Day”, Just for one day, try not to brag or to boast; and try not to talk about your success or accomplishments. Why? Because humility is a good thing. (Then tomorrow, you can brag about how humble you were!)
• “Pink Shirt Day” in Canada, a semi-annual event in which participants sign and wear a pink shirt to take a visible stance against bullying. The color is based on a campaign started by Travis Price and David Shepherd, who took a stand for a fellow student who was bullied for wearing a pink shirt to school. LINK: www.pinkshirtday.ca
• “Cook a Sweet Potato Day”, And the best way to do that? Sweet badayda fries. Mmm!
• “Margarita Day”, Tequila, triple sec, lime juice, and ice are everything you’ll need to celebrate … well, that and some good friends. And a tropical beach wouldn’t hurt.
• “Walking the Dog Day”, to encourage exercise for both dogs and their parents. Walking your dog helps build strong bonds through quality time spent together. Even if you walk your dog every day, today, explore a new area on your walk. (So, we’re not talking about the yo-yo trick here?)
• “Inconvenience Yourself Day”, not merely about inconveniencing oneself, it is about acknowledging others, putting them first, and having a positive effect on their lives. (There’s a meme that says: “There are 2 types of people: Those who believe in doing what’s best for everyone even if it means personal sacrifice, and those who see their own inconvenience as unacceptable, no matter what.” Perfect!)
• “World Thinking Day”, an annual celebration of Girl Scouts/Girl Guides founders Lord & Lady Baden-Powell’s joint birthday. Scouts & Guides are encouraged to “think” of good deeds.
• “National Wildlife Day”, to bring awareness to the number of endangered animals that need to be preserved and rescued. This day, formally observed on Sept. 4, has added the date of Feb. 22, to honor the memory and birthday of Wildlife Warrior, Steve Irwin. LINK: http://www.nationalwildlifeday.com/

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] Chili Day
[Thurs] Digital Learning Day
[Fri] Trading Card Day
[Sat] Open That Bottle Night
This Week is…Pancake Week
This Month is…Hot Breakfast Month

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1959 [64] Kyle MacLachlan, Yakima WA, TV actor (“Twin Peaks” 1990-91, plus the 2017 reboot, “Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.” 2014-15, “Desperate Housewives” 2006–2012)

1963 [60] Vijay Singh, Lautoka Fiji, PGA golfer (winner of The Masters in 2000, PGA Championship in 1998, 2004, Golf Hall of Fame, 2006)

1966 [57] Rachel Dratch, Lexington MA, TV actress (“Saturday Night Live” 1999-2006)/movie actress (“I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry”)

1967 [56] Paul Lieberstein, Westport CT, TV actor (‘Toby Flenderson’ in “The Office” 2005-2013)

1968 [55] Jeri Ryan, Munich Germany, TV actress (“Star Trek: Picard” since 2020, “Star Trek: Voyager” 1997-2001, “Boston Public” 2001-04)

1969 [54] Clinton Kelly, Panama City Panama, TV host (“The Chew” 2011-18, “What Not to Wear” 2003-13)

1974 [49] James Blunt (Blount), Tidworth England, pop singer (‘You’re Beautiful’, ‘Bonfire Heart’)

1975 [48] Drew Barrymore, Culver City CA, TV actress (“Santa Clarita Diet” 2017-19, “Grey Gardens” 2009)/movie actress (“50 First Dates”, “E.T.”)/TV host (“The Drew Barrymore Show” since 2020)

1979 [44] Tom Higgenson, Villa Park IL, pop singer (Plain White T’s-‘1234′, ‘Hey There Delilah’)

1985 [38] Zach Roerig, Montpelier OH, TV actor (“The Vampire Diaries” 2009-2017, “As the World Turns” 2005-07)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2008 [15] Serial bride and “Baywatch” actress Pamela Anderson files for marriage annulment from Rick Salomon, 4 months after getting married

2009 [14] Heath Ledger posthumously wins the ‘Best Supporting Actor’ Oscar for his performance as the ‘Joker’ in “The Dark Knight”

2019 [04] Jussie Smollett is suspended from the TV show “Empire” after it is revealed he made false claims about a racist and homophobic attack

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1989 [34] The very ‘unheavy’ Jethro Tull win the first Grammy for “Best Hard Rock/Metal Performance”, beating Metallica

2012 [11] 5 months after debuting ‘Call Me Maybe’ in her native Canada, Carly Rae Jepsen releases it in America, where it hits #1 and becomes the unofficial “Song of the Summer”

2017 [06] Jay-Z becomes first rapper inducted into Songwriters Hall of Fame, alongside Max Martin, Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1997 [26] Scientists in Scotland announce the first successful cloning of an adult mammal, ‘Dolly’ the sheep

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2014 [09] With a gold medal at Sochi, Norwegian cross-country skier Marit Bjoergen sets the record for most Winter Olympics medals won by a female, with 10 (retired with 15, more than any Olympic athlete, male or female)

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ Some cats are allergic to humans.
✓ Men get hiccups more often than women.
✓ Women tend to have a more acute sense of smell than men.
✓ Oranges were originally grown in Asia, and were green until they were grown in warmer climates.
✓ The sound of Darth Vader’s breathing in “Star Wars” was made with a scuba regulator.
✓ The majority of your brain is fat.
-UberFacts

Best of BS . . .
BS TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE YOUR KID CAN TEACH YOU:
• You can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
• No matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize a cat.
• When your mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.
• If your sister hits you, don’t hit her back. They always catch the second person.
• You can’t trust dogs to watch your food.
• Don’t sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
• Puppies still have bad breath, even after eating a Tic Tac.
• The best place to be when you are sad is in Grandma’s lap.
-Frist published in BS in 2010

TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ A report says that global warming could be drastically slowed if we all worked less. (Does this mean Meghan Markle is the “Greenest” person on earth?)
➠ Apparently, Antidepressant use among pets is on the rise. Vets say pets need meds when they start acting distant, lazy, and disobedient. (Which, of course, begs the question: how do you know when your cat needs ‘em?)
➠ The Daytona 500 took place over the weekend. (Don’t you find it strange that a sport with so many fans who can’t read features cars with so many words on them?)
➠ If you sneeze while driving at 60mph, you’ll travel 50 feet with your eyes closed, says a report. (OK, but what does sneezing while driving do to your Farmville Crops?)
➠ Fact of the Day:  Seahorses mate for life, and when they travel, they hold each others’ tails. (“That’s Just Amazing,” said no married man ever…)

BS WEB GOODIE:
Long-jumpers at home:  https://tinyurl.com/345s8zu9

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Anything can be a UFO if you’re not very curious…

BS WOULD YOU RATHER?
(***You run down the list while your caller decides which choice is more palatable …***)
• Would you rather have free Wi-Fi wherever you go, or unlimited free coffee at any coffee shop?
• Would you rather take amazing selfies, but all of your other pictures are horrible, or take breathtaking photographs of anything but yourself?
• Would you rather never have a toilet clog on you again, or never have the power go out again?
• Would you rather never get a paper cut again, or never get something stuck in your teeth again?
• Would you rather lose your best friend, or lose all of your friends EXCEPT for your best friend?
• Would you rather never have to clean a bathroom again or never have to do dishes again?
• Would you rather never be able to leave your own country, or never be able to fly in an airplane?
• Would you rather your earbuds and headphones never sit right on your ears, or have all music either slightly too quiet or slightly too loud?
• Would you rather never have another embarrassing fall in public or never feel the need to pass gas in public again?

BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s your best “Back in my day” story?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  The average person will do THIS 2 million times in their life. What is it?
Answer:  Swear

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is about.

 

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