Friday, January 3, 2025 – Edition: #7865

Subscribe Today – Don’t Be Scared Sheetless!

 

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ The stars will be out for the Golden Globes. The list of presenters for Sunday’s award show has been revealed, and it includes a mix of actors, comedians and some of the year’s most celebrated performers. Those include: Andrew Garfield, Anthony Mackie, Anya Taylor-Joy, Aubrey Plaza, Brandi Carlile, Catherine O’Hara, Colin Farrell, Colman Domingo, Demi Moore, Dwayne Johnson, Elton John, Gal Gadot, Glenn Close, Jeff Goldblum, Jennifer Coolidge, and Kaley Cuoco. Expect to also see Kate Hudson, Kathy Bates, Kerry Washington, Melissa McCarthy, Michael Keaton, Michelle Yeoh, Miles Teller, Mindy Kaling, Nicolas Cage, Salma Hayek Pinault, Sarah Paulson, Seth Rogen, Sharon Stone, Vin Diesel, Viola Davis, Zoë Kravitz, and more. The 82nd Golden Globes will air live on CBS, and stream on Paramount+. Nikki Glaser will host, the first woman to handle the proceedings solo.
-Variety
★ Talent agency William Morris Endeavor has denied it was pressured by Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds to drop Justin Baldoni, a day after Baldoni filed a $250 million lawsuit against The New York Times, which includes an allegation that the superstar couple attempted to have his agency drop him. In the suit, filed Dec 31, Baldoni claims that Reynolds demanded that his WME agent drop him at the “Deadpool & Wolverine” premiere. But in a statement, WME said: “This is not true. Baldoni’s former representative was not at the Deadpool & Wolverine premiere nor was there any pressure from Reynolds or Lively at any time to drop Baldoni as a client.” He was dropped by the agency on Dec. 21.
-People
★ Movie ticket sales took a bit of a hit in 2024. The annual domestic box office is expected to end up at around $8.75 billion, down more than 3% from 2023, according to estimates from Comscore. It’s not as bad as it was in the pandemic years, but it’s also not even close to the pre-pandemic era when the annual box office regularly surpassed $11 billion. The top domestic movie last year was “Inside Out 2”, with a total of $653 million, followed by “Deadpool & Wolverine” and “Wicked”. Estimates for 2025 predict a domestic haul of about $9 billion, an increase of about $300 million over 2024.
-Deadline, AP, BoxOfficePro
★ Meghan Markle is back on Instagram. Jan. 1, the Duchess of Sussex kicked off the new year with a new account on the social media platform. It had long been rumored that the handle @meghan belonged to her, and her first post under that account featured her in a video, wearing all white and running on the beach, writing “2025” in the sand before running back off camera. The clip was reportedly shot by her husband Prince Harry at a public beach near their Montecito, California home. Before she married Prince Harry, the “Suits” star had 3 million followers on an Instagram account under her own name, but shut it down in early 2019. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/9e9z7mcw
-People
★ Former “Dancing With the Stars” pro Cheryl Burke has announced that she’s suspending her DWTS podcast “Sex, Lies and Spray Tans.” Burke used the podcast as a way to comment on news surrounding the world of “DWTS,” including the arrest of former pro Artem Chigvinstev and the many backstage relationships that developed between celebs and partners. In an IG video, she thanked listeners, and stressed that she never intended to use Sex, Lies, and Spray Tans to spread negative perceptions of the show.
-Variety

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” (ABC/Global): Nikki Glaser, Nicholas Hoult, a performance from Broadway’s “The Outsiders” (R)
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Richard Gere, Bowen Yang, Jin (R)
• “The Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Kate McKinnon, Peter Sarsgaard (R)
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Kerry Washington, Darren Criss, Helen J Shen (R)
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Langston Kerman, David Gborie, Megan Gailey (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Day of Hot Topics, 12 Days of Holidays (R)
• “GMA3” (ABC): Celebrity chefs Alex Guarnaschelli, Caroline Choe, Frances Tariga, and Danny Lee; Caroline Manzo
• “Live With Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Glen Powell, Shaquille O’Neal
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Kaley Cuoco, Xolo Maridueña (R)
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Keke Palmer, Andrew Rannells, Damona Hoffman (R)
• “The Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Ken Jeong, Rita Ora, Robin Thicke, Jenny McCarthy (R)
• “The Greatest @Home Videos: Cedy Awards” (CBS): Honoring the cutest, craziest and most cheerful in viral video gold. Cedric the Entertainer hosts.
• “Happy’s Place” (NBC): When Bobbie tries to claim her rightful role as emcee for the Tavern’s anniversary party, she ignites a fierce showdown with Gabby; Isabella and Steve bet on who will come out on top, adding fuel to the fire.
• “20/20” (ABC): When a teen vanishes while home on college break, his sister sifts through texts and social media to help crack the case.
SATURDAY:
• “NFL Football” (ESPN, ABC, TSN): St. Louis Browns @ Baltimore Ravens; Cincinnati Bengals @ Pittsburgh Steelers
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC): Host Michael Keaton; Billie Eilish performs (R)
• “2025 World Junior Hockey Championship” (TSN, NHL): 2 semifinal games, teams TBD.
SUNDAY:
• “82nd Golden Globes” (CBS): Nikki Glaser hosts the annual award show honoring achievements in film and TV.
• “NFL Football” (CBS, Fox, TSN): Minnesota Vikings @ Detroit Lions; Miami Dolphins @ NY Jets
• “2025 World Junior Hockey Championship” (TSN, NHL): Gold and Bronze medal games, teams TBD.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Rihanna — surprised fans with a visit to a karaoke bar – where she sang her own songs. Saturday, she made an unexpected stop at Manhattan’s Girls Love Karaoke, where she took the stage to perform ‘Needed Me’ and ‘Sex With Me’. Footage shows RiRi also playfully teasing fans who have been eagerly awaiting new music, nearly 9 years after the release of “Anti”. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3upb99h4
• SZA — plans to add even more unheard songs to her latest album “LANA”. Several days after the “SOS Deluxe: LANA” LP dropped in Dec., she posted on X: “Just got word all updated mixes and new songs will be added Jan 6th when the label comes back from holiday.”
• Celine Dion — shared an inspirational message to her Instagram in which she reflected on her comeback year, and seemed to tease that we’ll be seeing more of her. She posted a pic of herself holding her hands up in prayer, and wrote, in part: “Your love and energy inspire me every day…Here’s to endless possibilities in the coming year.” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/8cwenk8e
• Phil Collins – Despite the fact that he has never even been nominated for induction to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame as a solo artist, hall chairman John Sykes recently said that even though he was enshrined as a member of Genesis in 2010, “that’s no excuse for not putting Phil Collins in, because he’s a great artist.”
• Neil Young – has pulled out of UK’s biggest music festival, citing interference by the BBC. He posted that he has decided not to play Glastonbury in June because the British Broadcasting Corporation, which has been named as a partner for the event, “wanted us to do a lot of things in a way we were not interested in”, and “because it is a corporate turn-off”.
• Thomas Rhett – wants to collaborate with Bruno Mars this year. Rhett, a longtime fan of the pop superstar, recorded a cover of Mars’ ‘When I Was Your Man’ in 2015, and in a recent interview, he said: “Is there an artist I’d love to collaborate with in the new year? It was and forever always will be Bruno Mars. I’m just going to keep saying it in interviews until it happens.”
• Cody Johnson – His goals for 2025, and include some diet changes and professional endeavors. When asked about it, he said: “Go back to my carnivore diet, get in better shape and ride more horses.” He also wants to record a collaboration with his “good buddy” Luke Combs, and would “really like to record something with…Lainey Wilson. I’m a big fan.”
• Lainey Wilson – Fans are buzzing that she may get married to her boyfriend, former NFL QB Devlin “Duck” Hodges, this year. When Bunnie Xo interviewed Wilson, Bunnie confessed that she’s “manifesting” a wedding for her in 2025. Wilson looked at the camera, and seemingly speaking to her boyfriend, remarked: “No pressure, brother!” Wilson later joked: “I might have to propose to him.”

SHOOTING THE BULL

GENERATION NEXT:
We’ve heard all about the names given to different generations, and the great (and not-so-great) characteristics that they bring to the table. There are, of course, the Boomers, Generation X, Millennials, Gen Z, Generation Alpha (born 2013-24) – and new for 2025: “Generation Beta”. Those born between now and 2039 are expected to be tech-savvy (of course) and socially conscious, and may prioritize adaptability, individuality, and sustainability. They’ll only know a post-pandemic world (unless another one comes along…). Someday, Taylor Swift will be the golden oldies their parents listen to in the car. And words like “rizz” and “skibidi” will be passé by the time they’re tempted to use them. They’ll use AI for everyday tasks without even thinking about it. And, according to experts, they’ll probably live to see past the beginning of the 22nd century – and may very well someday consider moving from areas of the world that are becoming uninhabitable. And while this might sound like a lot to digest, those involved in the study of this type of thing say that just like others born toward the beginning and end of a new generation, the first crop of Beta babies likely won’t be much different from younger Gen Alphas.
(Which, of course, means that they’ll be holding their breath for the next ‘Deadpool’ movie, too!)
(They’re also expected to never actually see someone smoking a cigarette, but witness people smoking weed everywhere but at daycare!)
-TorStar

GYM TIME:
With many attempting to “get serious” about their fitness at this time of year, you might be surprised at the results of a recent investigation into the average gym-goer’s fitness routine. A survey found that the typical workout takes a total of 47 minutes, on average. Fine. But it was also discovered that among those who regularly exercise, their pre- and post-workout routine takes nearly 4 hours! The poll, taken in the US, found that people are spending 101 minutes on pre-workout prep and 133 minutes recovering, on average. And what exactly is going on before and after we exercise? Beforehand, fitness enthusiasts report spending time programming their workouts, drinking or eating protein concoctions, and creating workout playlists. Afterward, exercisers tend to stretch, shower, eat a full meal, and log their workouts in an app or journal.
(And don’t forget that essential “gym-selfie”, or it never happened!)
(And THIS time of year, you can expect to spend another 45 minutes just waiting for the rowing machine!)
-NYPost

NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ Emergency teams responded to a panic alarm coming from a South African home – only to find that the call had been sent out as a result of some literal monkey business. Security company Mi7 National Group said on social media that its control room received multiple panic alarm signals from a home on Dec. 26, and after several units arrived, “the client informed them that a monkey had gotten into the home and nabbed a remote containing the panic button.” The monkey took off with it, and the company continued to receive panic signals until the primate was out of range of the receiver. Officials wrote: “the client opted not to have our teams chase down the culprit, and let him get away with the loot.” (Sounds like the monkey is handier with a remote than my grandmother is!)
➢ A hard candy lived up to its name when a Canadian woman bit into it – and broke her jaw. Javeria Wasim had seen videos of people biting into small jawbreaker candies, but had never seen anyone manage to bite through a big 3-inch jawbreaker, so she gave it a try. The 19-year-old only managed to dent the outer layer of the candy when she felt a piercing pain in her jaw. Her friend then pointed out that one of her teeth was chipped. After noticing that another tooth was loose, she then realized she could barely open her mouth without screaming in pain. After a trip to hospital by ambulance, and X-ray showed she had fractured her mandible in 2 places trying to bite into the jawbreaker. (We’re just thankful she didn’t try to wash it down with a “Paralyzer”!)

WORDS AND PHRASES BANNED FOR 2025:
Michigan’s Lake Superior State University has released its 2025 “List of Words Banished From the Queen’s English for Misuse, Overuse & General Uselessness”. Here is this year’s crop — and why they are no longer to be used, effective immediately…
✗ Cringe: While “cringe” once packed a punch, it has overstayed its welcome. Overuse has dulled its impact, and ironically, using it might now cause the very reaction it describes. (Hey! I was “cringe” before “Cringe” was cool!)
✗ Game Changer: This phrase, often used to describe anything remotely innovative, is as tired as a well-worn cliché. To put it bluntly: “Nothing is a game changer if everything is (called) a game changer.”
✗ Era: Taylor Swift might be to blame for the term’s overuse, which has made every fleeting moment feel like it demands a historical marker. Now, it seems there is an ‘era’ for everything! (I know! My wife just told me she’s in her “talk to the hand” era!)
✗ Dropped: It was once an edgy and cool way to describe the release of a new album, a trend, or a product. But with all kinds of unnecessary things currently being ‘dropped’ rather than introduced, released, or offered for sale, it has become overused, misused, and abused. (I feel like all that “dropped” stuff is landing on me!)
✗ IYKYK (If You Know, You Know): This internet slang phrase offers little clarity or substance. If you know, you might agree it is time to let this one go. (Plus, why is it that I NEVER know?)
✗ Sorry Not Sorry: A tired and lame apology masquerading as bold honesty, Banished Word enthusiasts recommend just saying what you mean, and perhaps showing a little kindness. (I’m just sorry that this one wasn’t banished about 8 years ago!)
✗ Skibidi: While this word, a nonsense term that can mean “cool” or “dumb”, or be used as a filler word, tends to resonate with a younger crowd, for many it is just noise. At this point, nobody even knows for sure WHAT it means, and it’s just annoying. (Although I’ve gotta admit, I did get a pretty skibidi belt for Christmas…)
✗ 100%: Banished for overuse, you’ve also got to wonder: “Since when should a percentage be used to describe your agreement in a conversation?” (And does the word “absolutely” not mean the exact same thing?)
✗ Utilize: This is one of those times when a longer word is not necessarily better. Why complicate things when “use” works just fine? After all, experts suggest you “write like you talk”. (Indubitably!)
✗ Period: Please stop using this word at the end of sentences as a way of punctuating your point. Overuse has turned this into a ‘period’ that needs to end. (…exclamation point!) 
(What word or phrase would you like to see “dropped”? Sorry ‘bout that…)
-LSSU

DID YOU KNOW?
You can buy coffee in all sorts of weird ways these days, including coffee butter, espresso tonics, and whiskey-flavored beans. So why not clear coffee? Slovakian brothers David and Adam Nagy invented “CLR CFF” because as heavy coffee drinkers, they were tired of stained teeth. CLR CFF, sold in bottles, is made from “high quality Arabica coffee beans and pure water,” and doesn’t contain “preservatives, artificial flavours, stabilizers, sugar or any other sweetener.” It took them 3 months to come up with their recipe, which they are keeping secret. A British newspaper reported that despite it’s look, the coffee is strong, similar to a “potent cold brew,” and that one bottle should last an entire day. (Coming soon – clear gravy!)
-Food&Wine

BS CHRONOMETER 01.03.25

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “J.R.R. Tolkien Day” (***Pron: Toll-KEEN***), recognizing the birth date of the author of “The Lord of the Rings” and “The Hobbit”. The Tolkien Society asks fans to honor his 1892 birth with a toast.
• “Women Rock! Day”. When it comes to rock and roll, it is usually male performers who are first remembered. Today, remember that women have made an immense contribution to rock and roll too. It takes place on the anniversary of the date in 1987 when Aretha Franklin became the first woman to be inducted into the Rock Hall of Fame.
• “Chocolate Covered Cherry Day”, celebrating the traditional dessert. Variations include cherry cordials with liquid fillings, often including cherry liqueur, chocolate-covered candied cherries and chocolate-covered dried cherries. (Go ahead…wasn’t one of your resolutions to eat more fruit??)
• “Drinking Straw Day”, celebrating the patent of the first artificial straw on this date in 1888. Drinking straws were hand-rolled until 1905. (How on earth were kids able to enjoy juice in their minivans before the invention of the straw?)
• “Festival of Sleep Day”, as declared by some anonymous walking zombie somewhere. Thanks to a combination of late hours, alcohol, rich foods, exposure to unfamiliar surroundings, and artificial light deep into the night over the holiday season, experts say most of us build up ‘sleep debt’, a condition which can affect how well we sleep for weeks afterward.
• “Memento Mori”, also known as “Remember You Die Day”, when we are to focus on our mortality, and how much time we have left to live. (I already did this – on New Year’s morning, when I was pretty sure I was gonna die!)
• “Humiliation Day” No, it is NOT a day to humiliate someone! Today, we recognize the negative effects that humiliation can have on people or groups of people (And dogs forced to wear onesies…)

SATURDAY:
• “Spaghetti Day”, celebrating the Italian pasta dish that almost everyone loves. Marco Polo brought the recipe for pasta back to Europe with him after his famous trip to China in the 13th century.
• “Trivia Day”, honoring those with ‘doctorates in uselessology’.
BS TRIVIA DAY QUIZ, COURTESY OF “TRIVIA CRACK”:
⇒ Who uttered the famous salute “Live Long and Prosper”? (“Star Trek’s” ‘Spock’)
⇒ Who wrote the French romantic novel “The Hunchback of Notre Dame”? (Victor Hugo)
⇒ What famous phrase is Marie Antoinette known for? (“Let them eat cake”)
⇒ In the sport of bull riding, which hand do you ride with? (Either)
⇒ A group of porcupines is known as what? (A ‘prickle’)
• “World Braille Day”, observed on the anniversary of the 1809 birth of Louis Braille in France. In 1829, he published “Method of Writing Words, Music & Plain Song by Means of Dots, for Use by the Blind”. Today, the ‘Braille method’ is used in virtually every language as the standard form of reading and writing by those with vision-loss.
• “World Hypnotism Day”, to correct the myths and misconceptions about hypnotism, and promote the truth and benefits of the process that helps many put aside fears, and change what they believed was unchangeable. (Not to mention bark like a dog…) LINK: http://www.worldhypnotismday.com
• “Tom Thumb Day”, commemorating the legacy of Charles Sherwood Stratton, the greatest actor of his time. Under his stage name “Tom Thumb”, he achieved global acclaim under the patronage of his mentor and adoptee, circus pioneer P. T. Barnum. Stratton, a dwarf, evaded the stigma that came with his condition and took his talent all the way to the courtyard of Queen Victoria.
• “Pop Music Chart Day”, celebrated on the anniversary of Billboard magazine publishing its first music hit parade on this date in 1936. Billboard is considered by many to be the “bible” of the music industry.
• “Fruitcake Toss Day”. It’s not like you were ever going to eat it…

SUNDAY:
• “Bird Day”, an annual observance where adherents celebrate through birdwatching, studying birds, and bird adoption. Part of the idea is to educate wannabe bird owners about the special issues involved with taking care of our fine feathered friends.
• “Whipped Cream Day” (aka Crème Chantilly), celebrating the sweet fluff used to top off desserts. (What’s the weirdest thing you put it on?)
• “Twelfth Night”, the “Eve of Epiphany”. Tomorrow is the “Twelfth Day of Christmas” when, according to the carol, your true love should give to you ‘12 drummers drumming’. Different traditions mark the date of “Twelfth Night” on either the 5th or 6th of January.
• “Screenwriters Day”. Most people think that the director creates the vision for the things they watch. They’d be surprised to discover that almost every movie or TV show was originally created, written, and rewritten long before the director ever heard of the project…by a screenwriter! Today, we honor the great screenwriters. (Quick – name one!)
• “National Keto Day”, an observance of the popular high-fat, low carb ketogenic diet that “has been shown to offer a number of health benefits, including weight loss, blood sugar maintenance, and cognitive support”, according to the Vitamin Shoppe, which originated the observance. (Fun “fact”: The keto diet won’t work unless you tell everyone you see that you’re on it!)

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1945 [80] Stephen Stills, Dallas TX, folk-rock singer/guitarist (Crosby, Stills & Nash-‘Suite: Judy Blue Eyes’, Buffalo Springfield-‘For What It’s Worth’)

1946 [79] John Paul Jones, Kent England, rock bassist/multi-instrumentalist/producer (Led Zeppelin-‘Stairway to Heaven’, ‘Whole Lotta Love’, Them Crooked Vultures-‘New Fang’)

1950 [75] Victoria Principal, Fukuoka Japan, TV actress (“Dallas” 1978-1991, “Titans” 2000-2001)

1956 [69] Mel Gibson, Peekskill NY, movie producer/director (“Braveheart”, “The Passion of the Christ”)/movie actor (“Lethal Weapon” series, “Mad Max” series)

1969 [56] Michael Schumacher, Hürth West Germany, retired Formula One driver (7-time F1 champion who continues to receive private rehab after a 2013 brain injury suffered in a skiing accident)

1975 [50] Thomas Bangalter, Paris France, electronica musician (Daft Punk ft. Pharrell Williams-‘Get Lucky’, The Weeknd ft. Daft Punk-‘Starboy’)

1975 [50] Danica McKeller, San Diego CA, TV actress (“The Wonder Years” 1988-1993, “Inspector Mom” 2006-2007)

1981 [44] Eli Manning, New Orleans LA, retired NFL quarterback (2X Super Bowl Champ and MVP-NY Giants)/brother of Peyton Manning/son of NFL veteran Archie Manning

1996 [29] Florence Pugh, Oxford England, movie actress (“Don’t Worry Darling”, “Little Women”, “Oppenheimer”) COMING UP… “East of Eden” miniseries

2003 [22] Greta Thunberg (***Pron: GRAY-tah TOON-bairyeh***), Stockholm Sweden, environmental activist/Time’s youngest-ever Person of the Year, 2019

SATURDAY- Tina Knowles (Miss Tina by Tina Knowles fashion brand) is 71; Patty Loveless (‘Blame it on Your Heart’) is 68; Michael Stipe (R.E.M.) is 65; Dave Foley (“The Kids In The Hall”) is 62; Julia Ormond (“Legends of the Fall”) is 60; Deana Carter (‘Strawberry Wine’) is 59; Michelle Mylett (“Letterkenny”) is 36; Charles Melton (“Riverdale”) is 34;

SUNDAY- Robert Duvall (“The Godfather”) is 94; Charlie Rose (“CBS This Morning”) is 83; Diane Keaton (“Annie Hall”) is 79; Clancy Brown (“The Shawshank Redemption”) is 66; Carrie Ann Inaba (“Dancing With the Stars”) is 57; Marilyn Manson (‘The Dope Show’) is 56; Rick Campanelli (“ET Canada”) is 55; Bradley Cooper (“A Star is Born” [2018]) is 50; January Jones (“Mad Men”) is 47; Deadmau5 (w/Kaskade-‘Move For Me’) is 44; Kristin Cavallari (“The Hills”) is 38

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2013 [12] Actor Gerard Depardieu is granted citizenship by Russian president Vladimir Putin after renouncing his French citizenship due to the country’s high taxes.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1987 [38] The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame inducts its first female artist, Aretha Franklin. Also among those inducted: Roy Orbison, Smokey Robinson, Marvin Gaye and Carl Perkins.

2002 [23] Liam & Noel Gallagher of Oasis top a poll on the celebrities that people would least like to live next to, with 40% of the vote.

2004 [21] Britney Spears marries childhood friend Jason Alexander at the Little White Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas, and 55 hours later, has the union annulled.

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1977 [48] Steve Wozniak and Steve Jobs incorporate Apple Computer, Inc. On this date in 2022, Apple becomes the first US company to be worth $3 trillion.

2009 [16] The Bitcoin network is created, as the first block of the digital currency is mined by a person or group of people using the name Satoshi Nakamoto.

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1992 [33] Bernard Moeller of Pennsylvania gets his 14,000th tattoo, leading to a Guinness record as the “Person with the Most Individual Tattoo Designs”.

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ More couples separate or divorce in January than any other month of the year.
✓ The term “OK” comes from the 1830s, when people jokingly spelled abbreviations incorrectly. As a result, “All correct” was turned into “orl korrekt”, which eventually became “OK”.
✓ Bleach expires after about 6 months.
✓ Millionaires who earned their wealth are happier than those who inherited it, according to a study.
✓ As odd as it sounds, most people have an above-average number of arms. (Google it!)
✓ Queen Elizabeth’s cows slept on waterbeds.
-RandomFactGenerator, ReadersDigest

Best of BS . . .
BS SIGNS YOU’VE JOINED A BAD GYM:
More people sign up at fitness clubs this week than any other time of the year. Beware if …
• The door to the front desk has a slot in it that slides open to verify your membership.
• There’s a KFC between the aerobics area and the free weights.
• The personal trainer claims that carrying his groceries up 30 flights is much better than a Stair-Master.
• It’s not actually carpet in the locker room, it’s really thick shower mould.
• On the way to the workout area, you pass several members’ memorial plaques.
-First Published in BS in 2017

MORE BS QUESTIONS PLAGUING HUMANITY:
• Why do we always ask babies and pets the same question twice?
• Why does someone recite at a play, but play at a recital?
• Why is it that people will buy anything that’s ‘one per customer’?
• Is cheese the plural of choose?
• Why is it that if you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you’ll always have a flat tire?
• When looking at a group picture, has anyone ever looked at anyone besides themselves when they said “I love it!”?
-First published in BS in 2017

BS WEB GOODIE:
If emojis had sound:  https://tinyurl.com/4s74e28v

BS RANDOM JOKE:
There is no “we” in chocolate.

☎ BS PHONE STARTER:
Quick! What caused your last face-palm?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Stats show that in a successful marriage, men should never do THIS first. What is it?
Answer:  Retire

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
A smart person knows what to say. A wise person knows whether to say it or not.