Tuesday, July 16, 2019 Edition: #6494
Bully For You!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ After years of speculation over who will take over Daniel Craig’s role as James Bond, reports of a new 007 are surfacing. British star Lashana Lynch is tackling the iconic role in the 25th edition of the spy franchise, which has called everyone from Sean Connery and Pierce Brosnan to Roger Moore and Timothy Dalton its lead. Reports say that while Lynch will snag 007’s famed code name, she is NOT technically the new Bond. Instead, she’ll play a new character who takes over Bond’s secret agent number after he leaves MI6.
-Yahoo
★ The remains of a body that was found in Oregon is likely that of missing actor Charles Levin, according to police. The 70-year-old actor who appeared on hit shows such as “Seinfeld,” “LA Law,” “Alice” and “The Golden Girls,” was reported missing by his son on July 8. Levin had been in the process of moving from his apartment in Grants Pass, Oregon, to a new home when he went missing.
-TheWrap
★ Halle Bailey was recently cast as ‘Ariel’ in the live adaptation of “The Little Mermaid”, and social media has a few other ideas about who should join her in the upcoming film. According to Twitter, Gordon Ramsay would be the perfect choice to play ‘Chef Louis’, the angry French chef who terrorizes Sebastian the crab, mainly because Ramsay is known on television as an angry chef, and he has a habit of terrorizing the contestants on his shows. He also loves seafood, which is important. Ramsay’s casting suggestion follows a Twitter movement to cast fellow chef Guy Fieri in the role of Ursula the sea witch.
-PopCulture
★ As America’s legions of Kennedy fans and foes are no doubt aware, today is the 20th anniversary of the shocking deaths of John F. Kennedy Jr., his wife Carolyn Bessette, and her sister, Lauren Bessette. The light plane they were flying in crashed into the Atlantic in fog off Martha’s Vineyard. Kennedy Jr. was 38, his wife was 33, and her sister was 34. American TV is well aware of the anniversary, so get ready for “specials” devoted to the tragedy, just as TV reacted in 1999 when this latest horror struck the Kennedy family.
-MSN
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Shaquille O’Neal, Fred Savage, Koffee
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Chance the Rapper, Jennifer Lopez, David Crosby, Cameron Crowe
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Awkwafina, Donny Deutsch, the Mountain Goats
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Dax Shepard, Nicolle Wallace, Weyes Blood, Raghav Mehrotra
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Lucy Liu, James Marsden (R)
• “Conan” (TBS): Sam Richardson, Rose Matafeo (R)
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Dorit Kemsley, Ramona Singer
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Joel McHale
• “The Talk” (CBS): Jenna Elfman
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Emily Deschanel, Ally Brooke
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Justin Hartley, Jon Dorenbos (R)
• “The Lion King: Can You Feel The Love Tonight with Robin Roberts” (ABC): Robin Roberts digs deep into the timeless appeal of “The Lion King.” Included: Interviews with cast and crew; behind-the-scenes footage; and an unreleased scene from the new movie.
• “JFK Jr.: The Final Year” (A&E): A look at the final year of John F. Kennedy, Jr.’s life, including never-before-seen footage and interviews with former President Bill Clinton, David Pecker, Gary Ginsberg, and Sasha Chermayeff.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Jennifer Lopez – Had to cancel her Madison Square Garden show on Saturday night. The concert had just started when a massive power outage swept across New York City, spelling an early end to her show as the theater was evacuated. Lopez took to Instagram to explain that the show had been canceled due to the unforeseeable circumstances.
• Kelly Clarkson – Her advice for Taylor Swift? She tweeted: “@taylorswift13 just a thought, U should go in & re-record all the songs that U don’t own the masters on exactly how U did them, but put brand new art & some kind of incentive so fans will no longer buy the old versions.” Clarkson went on to say that she would purchase Swift’s re-released music if only “to prove a point.”
• The Beatles — The two surviving members of the group reunited Saturday night. Paul McCartney brought Ringo Starr onstage during his show at LA’s Dodger Stadium for renditions of ‘Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band’ and ‘Helter Skelter’. Reports are that the crowd of 58,000 “went nuts”.
• David Bowie – Just in time for the 50th anniversary of his ‘Space Oddity’ single, Mattel has unveiled its Barbie David Bowie doll, which transforms into his iconic Ziggy Stardust stage persona. The limited-edition doll comes with a stand, a Certificate of Authenticity, and an image collage of Bowie’s early career. Ziggy Stardust Barbie sells for $50.
• Gregg Allman — Two years after his death, his 1973 solo debut “Laid Back”, and his 1974 live album “The Gregg Allman Tour” will be reissued on August 30th. The “Laid Back” reissue will come in a deluxe edition 2CD-set, with early mixes, demos and outtakes, including an unreleased demo of ‘These Days’. Both will also be available on vinyl.
• Granger Smith – His wife Amber Smith revealed on Instagram Saturday the family’s decision to donate their late son’s organs after his tragic passing, adding that the donation saved the lives of two people. River died at the age of 3 last month in a drowning accident at home.
• Miranda Lambert – Her new single ‘It All Comes Out In the Wash’ comes out on Thursday, but she gave fans an early listen. In a short snippet posted to Instagram, she picked up an old rotary phone and sang the feel-good chorus.
THIS WEEK’S VIDEO RELEASES: (Streaming and/or DVD)
• “Shazam!” (PG-13, Action/Adventure): We all have a superhero inside us, it just takes a bit of magic to bring it out. In Billy Batson’s case, by shouting out one word – SHAZAM – this streetwise fourteen-year-old foster kid can turn into the grown-up superhero Shazam. (Zachary Levi, Mark Strong)
• “Breakthrough” (PG, Drama): When her 14-year-old son drowns in a lake, a faithful mother prays for him to come back from the brink of death and be healed. (Topher Grace, Josh Lucas, Chrissy Metz)
• “Teen Spirit” (PG-13, Drama): In a spin on the Cinderella story, Violet is a shy teenager who dreams of escaping her small town and pursuing her passion to sing. With the help of an unlikely mentor, she enters a local singing competition that will test her integrity, talent and ambition. (Elle Fanning, Agnieszka Grochowska)
• “Little Woods” (R-Rated, Drama): Ollie is trying to survive the last few days of her probation in a fracking boomtown well beyond its prime. But when her mother dies, she is thrust back into the life of her estranged sister Deb, who is facing her own crisis with an unplanned pregnancy and a deadbeat ex. (Lily James, Tessa Thompson)
WORKIN’ HARD…OR HARDLY WORKIN’?
We all say that we’d have a lot less stress if only we worked less. But how much less? A University of Cambridge study claims to have found the work pattern that would be best for employees’ mental health. It took into account links between how much people work, their mental health and life satisfaction, and found that it is best for mental well-being to work just one day per week. Or eight hours in the course of a week. That’s correct…the study found that those who work eight hours per week can expect to enjoy better boosts to mental health than either those who work full-time, or those who do not work at all. While the study’s authors are quite aware that most of us can’t even imagine being able to survive on an eight-hour workweek, they suggest looking at other options, such as five-day weekends, limiting work to just a couple of hours per day, or increasing vacations and time off to months rather than weeks.
(OK, you’ve convinced me! Now could you talk to my boss?)
(Working 8 hour a week is the secret to mental health? Maybe (***afternoon guy***) is on to something…)
(I know I couldn’t afford it, but on the plus side, I WOULD save a lot on gas…)
-AskMen
SINGLE FAULT:
Wimbledon watchers this year might not have noticed a small but important change to how female tennis players are referred to by umpires. Before, the umpire calling results would say “game Miss… “or game Mrs…” throughout each set, rather than referring to players by their last name, as they do with men, for example, “game, Federer”. Because many women are keeping their last name after marriage, or prefer “Ms.”, or just generally don’t want to have their marital status referred to at work, it’s clear Wimbledon needed to move with the times. The issue was highlighted last year after Serena Williams got married but kept her last name. That meant she was slightly awkwardly referred to as “Mrs. Williams” on the court. So, for this year’s tournament, which wrapped up on Sunday, organizers decided to leave out making marital status a thing during games. The decision brings the competition in line with the French Open which also dropped “Madam and Mademoiselle” when addressing female players this year.
(But Wimbledon players still have to dress in all-white?)
-Good
ISSUES THAT SCIENTISTS ARE STILL BATTLING OVER:
➠ Is Pluto a Planet? You might be sick of this question, but planetary scientists aren’t. According to a May 2018 op-ed by two astronomers in the Washington Post, the 2005 redefinition of the word “planet” that left Pluto with “dwarf-planet” status, should be reconsidered. Here’s one of their points: Under the current definition, a planet must have “cleared its neighborhood,” meaning it must have either deflected or accumulated all of the space debris in its orbit. By that reasoning, Earth was not a planet for the first 500 million years of its existence.
➠ What Is Death? There are a lot of different ways to define death, and they don’t always line up with each other. Is it when your heart stops beating? But there are “beating heart cadavers” who are completely brain dead, but whose organs still function. (Well, if your heart stops beating, it certainly can’t be a GOOD sign!)
➠ Are Viruses Alive? Over time, they’ve been classified as poisons, life forms, biological chemicals, and life forms again. Scientists can’t quite decide if they’re alive or not, since they’re capable of reproduction but only by hijacking the processes of living cells.
➠ Is It Brontosaurus or Apatosaurus? For many years, everyone’s favorite childhood dinosaur, the Brontosaurus, was persona non-grata. A paleontologist dug up one set of bones in 1877 and called the animal “Apatosaurus,” then dug up another set two years later and named that animal “Brontosaurus.” Later, it was determined that these were, in fact, two versions of the same animal, so the older name won out. But another analysis in 2015 revealed a number of differences between the two specimens, making the Brontosaurus a thing again. (So, the Brontosaurus went extinct…twice?)
➠ What Happened Before the Big Bang? The answer is unlikely to ever be proven definitively. Perhaps our universe sprung out of another, older one. Perhaps our Big Bang was just one of several similar spatial expansions, each one exploding into its own universe-in-a-bubble. (I’m pretty sure I know what happened before the Big Bang: “Young Sheldon.”)
-Curiosity
DID YOU KNOW?
A 2017 study showed that citronella — such as that used in outdoor candles — does nothing to deter mosquitoes. In fact, the experiment showed that citronella candles actually attracted them.
-Curiosity
BS CHRONOMETER 07.16.18
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1943 [76] Jimmy Johnson, Port Arthur TX, sports analyst (“Fox NFL Sunday”)/former NFL coach (Miami Dolphins, 2 Super Bowls-Dallas Cowboys)
1952 [69] Stewart Copeland, Alexandria, Egypt, rock drummer (Police-‘Every Breath You Take’, ‘King of Pain’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2003)
1963 [56] Phoebe Cates, New York City NY, movie actress (“Fast Times at Ridgemont High”, “Gremlins”)
1967 [52] Will Ferrell, Irvine CA, movie actor (“Anchorman” movies, “Elf”)/TV comic (“Saturday Night Live” 1995-2002) COMING UP…”Zeroville”, 2019
1971 [48] Corey Feldman, Los Angeles CA, movie actor (“Goonies”, “The Lost Boys”, “Stand By Me”)
1979 [40] Jayma Mays, Bristol TN, TV actress (‘Debbie’ on “The Millers” 2013-15, “Glee” 2009-15)/movie actress (“Paul Blart: Mall Cop” films, “The Smurfs” movies) COMING UP…”Bill & Ted Face the Music”, 2020
1987 [32] AnnaLynne McCord, Atlanta GA, TV actress (“90210” 2008-13, “Nip/Tuck” 2007-09)
1996 [23] Luke Hemmings, Sydney, Australia, pop singer (5 Seconds of Summer- ‘She Looks So Perfect’)
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Fresh Spinach Day”, an occasion to make use of some healthful leafy greens in your favorite recipes. Spinach & sharp cheese omelet, anyone?
• “World Snake Day”, an annual celebration by wildlife enthusiasts of the age-old fascination with these beautiful but misunderstood creatures. (Snakes are so creepy that even snakes are afraid of snakes…)
• “Personal Chefs Day”, an annual reminder to consider hiring a private chef for a day, a unique way to entertain friends and business guests in your home. It’s not as costly as you might think. (Funny enough, there is also a Personal Chef Day is February. Was this part of the contract?)
• “Guinea Pig Appreciation Day”, as far as small fuzzies go, the Guinea Pig is certainly one of the world’s favorites. Having been domesticated in South America for thousands of years, they’re one of the longest-serving companions to humans and today are the pet of choice for many children and adults alike.
• “Corn Fritter Day”, a celebration of comfort food and simple cooking. With some corn, egg, flour, milk, and melted butter, anyone can throw together a batch of these side dish favorites. With some creativity, you can add your own favorite ingredients to spice them up or create your very own fritter monstrosity. Sardines and chocolate chips, anyone?
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Hot Dog Day
[Wed] National Tattoo Day
[Thurs] World Listening Day
[Thurs] National Caviar Day
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2004 [15] Martha Stewart is sentenced to five months in prison plus five months in home confinement for lying to federal investigators
2017 [02] BBC announces the first-ever female ‘Doctor Who’ will be played by Jodie Whittaker
THIS DAY IN SPORTS . . .
1988 [31] Hockey superstar Wayne Gretzky and actress Janet Jones (“Police Academy 5″) wed in Edmonton
2017 [02] Roger Federer beats Marin Cilic for a record 8th Wimbledon men’s title
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2014 [05] Bluesman Johnny Winter dies at age 70 near Zurich, Switzerland
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1935 [84] World’s 1st parking meter, the ‘Park-O-Meter #1’, is installed in Oklahoma City OK
1969 [50] Apollo 11 is launched, carrying the first men to land on the Moon (July 20)
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2003 [16] A drink sold at the Ritz Hotel in Paris, France is recognized as ‘Most Expensive Commercially Available Cocktail In the World’ by Guinness World Records (‘The Sidecar’, containing hundred-year-old Champagne Cognac, costs $440.88 a glass … plus tip)
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ From “Dr. No” to “Quantum of Solace”, James Bond has killed 352 people and slept with 52 women.
✓ Cleopatra lived closer to the invention of the iPhone than she did to the building of the Great Pyramid.
✓ Andre Agassi, who won 8 grand slams, once said he hates tennis “with a dark and secret passion.”
✓ Mosquitos can not only smell your blood type, they prefer type O.
✓ Bees know when it’s going to rain, so they put in extra work the day before.
✓ In 2007, a man named Jeremy Harper counted to one million. He did not leave his apartment or shave until he finished, and it was all broadcast live on a webcam. It took him 3 months.
-WhattheFFacts
BS SIGNS THAT YOU’RE LIVING IN THE PAST:
• Every time you go to a concert, it’s a “farewell tour”.
• You find yourself making frequent use of the word “newfangled”.
• Landline.
• You have a VCR, and aren’t afraid to use it.
• You still call “hashtags” “poundsigns”.
• You’re still trying to text her, even though she unfriended you on Facebook and blocked you on Twitter.
• All your calendars are B.C.
• Aladdin, Lion King and Dumbo are all in your local theater.
• Every once in a while, you still call 867-5309 to see if someone answers.
• Like me, your paycheque is the same as it was 20 years ago…
-Twitter
Best of BS . . .
BS TEXTS FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE:
• I should’ve cut the blue wire.
• Delete my search history!
• Would it be too literal if I started ghosting you now?
• I guess I should’ve forwarded that message to 10 people.
• Sorry. I guess I’ve left the toilet seat up forever.
• Apparently her cheesecake WAS to die for!
• Thanks for holding my beer while I tried that.
• Hey, it could be worse. I could be alive with Donald Trump as president. Sucks to be you!
• New astral plane who dis?
• So, clearly, I’m not dead. Could you maybe get me out, or at least get me Wi-Fi?
-Twitter, first published in ‘BS’ in 2018
BS PHONE STARTER:
What did you think was cool when you were young, but isn’t cool now?
BS TOUGH TRUE OR FALSE TRIVIA:
• Shanghai, China is the largest city in the world by population.
A: False (Tokyo, Japan, 38 million, Shanghai, 26 million)
• The South Pole is colder than the North Pole.
A: True (because it sits on a thick sheet of ice)
• The liquid inside a volcano is called ‘magma’.
A: True (once it’s outside the volcano, it’s called ‘lava’)
-TrueorFalse
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I’ve decided to sell all my chiropractic magazines. I have tons of back issues.
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: The average lifespan of THIS household item is 10 years. What is it?
Answer: Vacuum cleaner
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Those who have no vices also have no virtues.