The Bull Sheet

June 20, 2008

Friday, June 20, 2008        Edition: #3802
Sweet Sheet!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Britney Spears has arrived in Kentwood LA to be by 16-year-old sister Jamie Lynn’s side as she prepares to give birth (Brit knows how to have ‘em, just not how to keep ‘em)  . . . A Los Angeles hotel is suing music producer Phil Spector for allegedly dodging the $100,000-bill for a block of rooms reserved for his legal team & defense witnesses during his 1st murder trial LAST YEAR (maybe they’ll go double or nothing on the next?) . . . A FEBRUARY trial date has been set for a lawsuit by Sonja Norwood (mother of singer Brandy) against reality-TV’s Kardashian siblings, which accuses them of racking up over $120,000 in unauthorized credit card charges while Kim Kardashian was working as Brandy’s stylist in 2006-07 (she was also boinking brother Ray J, so likely figures she was owed) . . . In Australia, a Senate committee has rejected proposed regulations to ban certain swear words on Australian TV following an inquiry prompted by foul-mouthed TV chef Gordon Ramsay (who reacted by saying, “F-ing idiots, haven’t they heard of f-ing free speech?”) . . . The pilot episode of “Fringe”, producer JJ Abrams’s new action/sci-fi TV series coming to FOX-TV this SEPTEMBER has been leaked online (the de rigeur new way of generating buzz – an ‘accidental’ leak) . . . Former “Friends” actor Matthew Perry is developing a pilot for Showtime in which he’d play ‘a talk show host who’s an egomaniac in need of redemption’ (as opposed to the failed “Studio 60” in which he played a TV writer who’s an egomaniac in need of facial expressions) . . . Actress Jorja Fox is heading back to “CSI” (CBS/CTV) to reprise her role as ‘Sara Sidle’, at least for the 3rd episode of the new FALL season (then they’ll have ‘Warrick Brown ’ cruelly kill her off) . . . Just as actor Charlie Sheen has issued a public apology for an expletive-laden voicemail he left ex-wife Denise Richards 2 years ago, the actress turned ninja-divorcée has announced ‘the gloves are off’ in the tacky ongoing feud over child custody (we must have missed the part when they were on) . . . And among the just-announced recipients who’ll get stars on Hollywood’s Walk of Fame in 2009 are – the Village People (wow, they’re running out of people – who’s next, Andy Dick?).

WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Air India 182“ (CBC) – SUNDAY this docu-drama recreates the tragic 1985 bombing of an Air India flight, which remains the worst mass murder in Canada’s history.
• “Daytime Emmy Awards” (ABC) – TONIGHT the 35th annual honors are handed out in  in Los Angeles. A few highlights …
– “Ellen DeGeneres Show”, “Rachael Ray”, and “The View” are up for ‘Best Talk Show’.
– “Dr Phil”, “Tyra Banks Show”, and “A Place of Our Own” compete in the new category ‘Best Informative Talk Show’.
– “General Hospital”, “Guiding Light”, “One Life to Live”, and “Young & the Restless” are nominated for ‘Best Daytime Serial’.
• “F’n MTV Premieres” (MTV) – TONIGHT Lil Wayne performs “A Mille” and “Lollipop”; Duffy performs “Mercy”.
• “Once Upon a Prom” (MTV) – SATURDAY a 1-hour special has country music ‘it’ girl Taylor Swift deciding which dateless teen she will accompany to a high school prom in Tuscaloosa AL.
• Stars Down – SATURDAY Toronto’s Lukas Rossi (“Rock Star: Supernova”) debuts his new alt-rock band at the Viper Room in West Hollywood CA.
• Virgin Festival – SATURDAY-SUNDAY Calgary’s version of the ubiquitous rock event includes performances by City & Colour, the Fratellis, Stone Temple Pilots, Three Days Grace, and the Tragically Hip at Fort Calgary.
NET: http://www.virginfestival.ca/calgary/

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Aerosmith – Frontman Steven Tyler has been spotted sitting courtside at a Boston Celtics’ basketball game, suggesting his rehab in Pasadena CA, allegedly due to a foot injury, has been successful.
• Bette Midler – TONIGHT she performs on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel).
• Carrie Underwood – She’s the musical guest on a rerun of “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global), hosted by Tina Fey (“30 Rock”).
• Guns ‘N Roses – Axl Rose’s lawyers have quickly forced a website to remove what it alleged were streams of 9 finished tracks from the “Chinese Democracy” album, which still has no release date after 10-years-in-the-making. (Hmm, smell a publicity stunt?)
• Kid Rock – He’s been whining that iTunes is just a reincarnation of the old record company system, whereby artists aren’t properly compensated for their music.
• Neil Diamond – THIS MORNING he guests on “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV).
• Poison – The classic rockers are suing their record company for unpaid royalties. (They just noticed, like 20 years later?)
• Rihanna – THIS MORNING she performs on the “Today Show” (NBC).
• Young Jeezy – The “Soul Survivor” rapper is due in court JULY 17th after being popped in Atlanta GA for DUI, speeding, reckless driving, no tags, driving with an open container, and no proof of insurance. (On the upside, he apparently avoided charges for shoplifting.)

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Get Smart” ( PG-13 Action Comedy ): Steve Carell stars as ‘Maxwell Smart’, Agent 86 for CONTROL, who battles the forces of KAOS with the more-competent Agent 99 (Anne Hathaway) at his side. Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson & Alan Arkin co-star. Cameos by James Caan (‘The President’) & Bill Murray (‘Agent 13′). Based on Mel Brooks’ classic TV series which starred Don Adams & Barbara Feldon (1965-70). Partially shot in Montréal & Harrington QC.
NET: http://getsmartmovie.warnerbros.com/
• “The Love Guru” ( PG-13 Comedy ): Mike Myers stars as ‘Pitka’, an American raised outside the country by gurus, who returns home to break into the self-help biz. His first challenge is to settle the romantic & professional troubles a star NHL hockey player. Co-stars Jessica Alba, Romany Malco (“Weeds”), and Justin Timberlake. Verne Troyer (“Austin Powers”), Stephen Colbert (“The Colbert Report”), Ben Kingsley (“Ghandi”), and Rob Blake (LA Kings) have small roles. Shot entirely in Toronto, including scenes in the Air Canada Centre and Casa Loma.
NET: http://www.lovegurumovie.com/

THE CUTTING EDGE OF EGO:
If you like your gadgets then you’re probably also assertive and a strong leader, according to a new survey. A Mindset Media online poll of some 25,000 consumers finds that technology lovers rank high in personality traits such as ‘leadership’ and ‘dynamism’ but low on ‘modesty’ … but then that’s to be expected if you insist on buying the latest and greatest. Researchers suggest there’s an element of pride in being able to say you’re onto the next big thing. (We say it’s cooler – and far cheaper – to be onto the 5th-last big thing. Wanna burnt CD?)
– Reuters

LATEST OIL BUZZ:
LS9 Inc, a company formed by Silicon Valley executives in California, is attempting to produce a new fuel made from … bug poop. Its so-called ‘Oil 2.0′ is composed of excrement from altered industrial yeast or safe strains of E coli bacteria. So far, the company’s lab has only managed to produce the biofuel in small amounts, enough to fill a beaker. The production process involves feeding wheat straw to the single-celled bugs to make them excrete oil. (Scientists were overheard yelling, “We’re rich, we’re rich, they’re crappin’ crude!”)
– AHN

LIFE FOR SALE:
SUNDAY through June 29th a Perth, Australia man is auctioning off … his entire life. 44-year-old Ian Usher is putting up everything he owns, including his 3-bedroom house, his car, his motorcycle, his wardrobe, even his job (rug store assistant). He recently split from his 5-year wife and is looking to make a fresh start, as well as about $400,000. Bidding begins at noon Australian WST at $1 AUD. (How much would your ‘life’ be worth?)
NET: http://www.alife4sale.com/
– “Telegraph”

TELETUBBIES:
According to a new Stats-Canada study, Canadian adults who spend hours a day in front of TV and/or computer screens are more likely to be obese. In fact, the odds of obesity among people who watch 21-or-more hours of TV per week are about twice that of people who watch 5 hours or less. The link between obesity and ‘screen time’ is consistent no matter the age, education, household income, or location of viewers. Interestingly, the ‘fat factor’ does not seem to apply to another seemingly sedentary activity … reading. (Due to all that exercise you get turning pages.)
– CBC News

REALITY LEADS TO FANTASY:
A new University of Buffalo study has found that people who watch a lot of reality TV are more likely to collect a large ‘friend’ list on social network sites, sharing photos and personal info with people they’ve never met. Lead researcher Michael Stefanone suggests that’s because reality TV stars gain celebrity and are rewarded for being the center of attention. That communicates to the idea to viewers that these behaviors are admirable and something to be mimicked. (To refute this, let’s review the big reality stars from 5 years back … oops, can’t remember any.)
– “The Spectrum“

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• The interjection ‘hey’ did not exist prior to the 13th century.
– Merriam-Webster.com
• An estimated 15 million ballpoint pens are sold worldwide each day.
– “Social Studies”
• There’s more gold in a single asteroid, Eros, than has ever been mined on Earth.
– “Discover Magazine”
• The average power drill is switched on for a total of only about 12 minutes during its lifetime.
– “Globe & Mail”

BS CHRONOMETER 06.20.08

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1942 [66] Brian Wilson, Inglewood CA, oldies singer/songwriter (Beach Boys-“Good Vibrations”, “I Get Around”)/Songwriter’s Hall Of Fame (2000)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1988)

1945 [63] Anne Murray, Springhill NS, oldies singer (“Snowbird”, “You Needed Me”)/Songwriters Hall of Fame Hitmaker Award (2008)/Canadian Songwriters Hall of Fame Legacy Award (2006)/Canadian Country Music Association Hall of Fame (2002)/Canada’s Walk of Fame (1998)/Canadian Music Hall of Fame (1993)/Order of Canada (1984)/Hollywood Walk of Fame (1980)

1949 [59] Lionel Richie, Tuskegee AL, oldies singer (“All Night Long”, Commodores-“Easy”)/father of Nicole Richie (“The Simple Life”)

1952 [56] John Goodman, Afton MO, movie actor (“Speed Racer”, “Evan Almighty”)/TV actor (“Roseanne” 1988-97)

1967 [41] Nicole Kidman, Honolulu HI, movie actress (“The Interpreter”, 2003 Oscar-“The Hours”)/Mrs Keith Urban since 2006/Mrs Tom Cruise 1990-2001  COMING UP: Plays ‘Lady Sarah Ashley’ in the historical epic “Australia”, opening NOVEMBER 14.

1968 [40] Robert Rodriguez, San Antonio TX, movie director/producer/screenwriter (“Grindhouse”, “Sin City”)

1989 [19] Christopher Mintz-Plasse, LA CA, movie actor (“Superbad”)

SATURDAY –
Comedian Joe Flaherty (“SCTV”) is 67; Oldies singer Ray Davies (The Kinks) is 64; Rock drummer Joey Kramer (Aerosmith) is 58; Rock guitarist Nils Lofgren (E Street Band) is 57; TV actor Doug Savant (“Desperate Housewives”) is 44; Country musician Porter Howell (Little Texas) is 44; Rock guitarist Mike Einziger (Incubus) is 32; Rock singer Brandon Flowers (The Killers) is 27; Britain’s Prince William is 26.

SUNDAY –
Country singer/actor Kris Kristofferson is 72; Movie actress Meryl Streep (“The Devil Wears Prada”) is 59; Canadian movie actor Graham Greene (“Dances With Wolves”) is 56; Oldies singer Cyndi Lauper (“True Colors”) is 55; Author Dan Brown (“Da Vinci Code”) is 44; TV actress Amy Brenneman (“Private Practice”) is 44; Pop singer Steven Page (Barenaked Ladies) is 38; TV host Carson Daly (“Last Call With Carson Daly”) is 35.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Canadian North Midnight Classic”, the 60th anniversary all-night golf tournament in Yellowknife NT celebrating the Summer Solstice.
NET: http://tinyurl.com/52upzs
 • “Last Day of Spring” as TONIGHT the “Summer Solstice” occurs at 7:59 pm EDT. ‘Solstice’ comes from the Latin words ‘sol’ (sun) and ‘sistit’ (stands).
• “Pride Week” in Toronto through JUNE 29th, Canada’s largest gay & lesbian pride event, which features hundreds of performances, artisans, the annual ‘Dyke March’ (JUNE 28th) and the famous ‘Pride Parade’ (JUNE 29th). Sandra Bernhard headlines SUNDAY’s signature comedy event at Massey Hall.
NET: http://www.pridetoronto.com/
• “Take Your Dog to Work Day”, created by Pet Sitters International in 1999 to give dog owners the opportunity to invite their ‘best friend’ into participating workplaces. The occasion has grown big enough to warrant its own theme song, found here …
NET: http://takeyourdog.com/
• “World Refugee Day”, first declared by the UN in 2001 as an expression of solidarity with Africa, which hosts the most refugees.
NET: http://www.un.org/depts/dhl/refugee/

SATURDAY –
• “Aimless Wandering Day”. Finally, someone’s taken an interest in my career!
• “Baby Boomers Recognition Day”, a special day to commemorate the accomplishments of ol’ farts everywhere.
• “Cancer the Crab” zodiac sign begins.
• “Dragon Boat Festival”, the 20th annual in Vancouver, North America’s largest version of the event which is expected to attract upwards of 200 dragon boat teams from around-the-world.
NET: http://www.adbf.com/
• “National Aboriginal Day” in Canada, established in 1996 by Indian & Northern Affairs Canada as a special day to celebrate the unique heritage, cultures and contributions of First Nations, Inuit & Metis people in Canada. It’s part of the “Celebrate Canada Celebrations”, which also include “Saint-Jean-Baptiste Day” (JUNE 24), “Canadian Multiculturalism Day” (JUNE 27) and “Canada Day” (JULY 1).
NET: http://www.ainc-inac.gc.ca/nad/index-eng.asp
• “Summer Solstice” in the Northwest Territories, Canada’s land of the Midnight Sun, celebrated variously as “Midnight Madness” in Inuvik, “Raven Mad Daze” in Yellowknife and “Longest Day Celebrations” in Fort Simpson. All will feature music, dance, food, sports … and sunburns.
• “Midnight Sun Baseball Classic”, the 103rd in Fairbanks AK which begins at 10:30 pm WITHOUT artificial lights, because these days Alaskans are enjoying 22 hours of sunlight daily.
NET: http://www.goldpanners.com/MSG/media-kit.html
• “National Hollerin’ Contest”, the 40th annual screams into Spivey’s Corner NC, the ‘Hollerin’ Capital of the Universe’. Hollerin’ was the original form of communication in them thar’ hills.
NET: http://www.ibiblio.org/hollerin/
• “Pick Up Some Litter Day”. Great idea, but make sure it’s not the kitty’s!

SUNDAY –
• “Midsummer Eve” in Northern Europe, celebrating summer with maypoles, music, dancing and bonfires. In Sweden and Finland it’s considered one of the year’s greatest festivals, comparable to Christmas and New Year’s Eve. The tradition goes back to ancient times.
• “Mirthday”, a day to celebrate individualism and appreciate your own uniqueness. This is the day to make choices that are for your own good. It’s also a good excuse for a ‘Mirthday Party’ … although it kinda sounds like a speech impediment.
• “Stupid Guy Thing Day”. Women are always talking about it (“Oh that’s just another stupid guy thing …”), so here’s the day to commemorate it! Women everywhere are encouraged to make a list of ‘Stupid Guy Things’ and pass it on (TV sports, power tools, souped-up cars, etc).

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1997 [11] “Batman & Robin” opens in movie theaters, starring George Clooney, Chris O’Donnell, Alicia Silverstone (‘Batgirl’), Arnold Schwarzeneggar (‘Mr Freeze’), and Uma Thurman (‘Poison Ivy’)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1987 [21] Whitney Houston’s “Whitney” becomes the 1st album by a female artist to debut at #1

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1877 [131] 1st ‘Commercial Telephone Service’ in Canada is offered in Hamilton ON

1909 [99] 1st ‘Hot Air Balloon Wedding’, in Cape Cod MA (“If the airship’s rockin’ …”)

1914 [94] ‘Noxema’ skin cream is introduced (named because it ‘knocks eczema’ out)

COMING UP . . .
[Mon] Pink Day
[Mon] Let It Go Day
[Mon] Discovery Day (NL)
[Mon] Coldplay free concert (NYC)
[Mon] PC-Turnoff Week begins
[Tues] St-Jean-Baptiste Day (QC)
[Tues] 2008 BET Awards (Los Angeles)
[Tues] 34th Saturn Awards (Los Angeles)
This Week Is … Fish Are Friends, Not Food! Week
This Month Is … Celibacy Awareness Month

BULL’S BITS

HOTTEST BACHELORS 2008:
A new ranking of the studliest single celebs …
5. Bryan Spears (TV/film producer, Britney’s older brother)
4. Terrence Howard (“Iron Man”)
3. David Cook (“American Idol”)
2. [tie] Brody Jenner & Frankie Delgado (“The Hills”)
1. Mario Lopez (“Dancing With the Stars“)
NET: http://tinyurl.com/56sksl
– “People Magazine”

BS PHONE STARTER:
If you had to sell your soul for one thing, what would it be?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
You know you’re screwed when you can’t afford the stamps to mail the payment.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: New research suggests that men who possess THIS desirable ability are actually less committed and less likely to be happy in relationships.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Well-spoken and articulate.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
I think; therefore … I think I am.

 

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