The Bull Sheet

June 22, 2006

Thursday, June 22, 2006          Edition: #3311
Ahhhh, Your Daily Bovine Colonic!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY a Christie’s auction of film & entertainment memorabilia in NYC includes one of avant garde artist Andy Warhol’s signature silver wigs, items formerly belonging to actors Marlon Brando & Clark Gable, and Marilyn Monroe’s personal ‘little black book’, circa 1960-62 (hey, what’s this listing under JFK?) . . . TONIGHT through July 2 is the 2006 “Los Angeles Film Festival”, with “Star Wars” mastermind George Lucas serving as the honorary ‘Guest Director’ (what filmmakers do when they’re finished making films) . . . Though no induction ceremony has yet been scheduled, new members joining the “Academy of Television Art & Sciences Hall of Fame” will include actor William Shatner (“Boston Legal”, “Star Trek”), retired NBC-TV news anchor Tom Brokaw & TV personality Regis Philbin (“America’s Got Talent”, “Live with Regis and Kelly”) . . . 33-year-old model-turned-TV host Heidi Klum (“Project Runway”) and her 43-year-old singer-husband Seal have confirmed they’re expecting their 2nd child together (give mommy a break – little ‘Henry’ is just 8-months-old!) . . . If you feel like you’re waiting longer for a movie to start you‘re absolutely right – new figures show that revenue from advertising shown on movie-theater screens is up about 21% in the past year . . . And word has it Jessica Simpson is devastated that estranged hubby Nick Lachey is dating MTV host Vanessa Minnillo, because they used to be buddies and Minnillo was one who reportedly urged Jessica to leave Nick (alas, why do women fight over losers?).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• The Game – TONIGHT he’s on “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC).
• Jay-Z – He’s banned Cristal from his NYC nightclub 40/40 after the company’s boss made what he considers racist comments about the champagne’s association with hip-hop. He’s also threatened to omit all mention of Cristal in lyrics during his show this SUNDAY at NYC’s Radio City Music Hall, marking the 10th anniversary of his album “Reasonable Doubt”.
• Michael Bublé – TONIGHT he kicks off a month-long summer tour in Madison WI.
• Nelly Furtado – TODAY she guests on “The View” (ABC/CTV).
• Taylor Hicks – TONIGHT the “American Idol” winner appears on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC).
• Tim McGraw & Faith Hill – TONIGHT they perform at the 5th annual “Samsung Four Seasons of Hope” gala in NYC, a fundraiser for their newly-established Neighbor’s Keeper Foundation.
• Yellowcard – TONIGHT they perform on “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS).

MOVIES IN THE MAKING:
• “Drillbit Taylor” – In this comedy due NEXT SUMMER, a pair of high school freshmen hire a guy they (wrongly) think is a soldier of fortune (Owen Wilson) to protect them from a bully. The script is being written by Kris Brown & Seth Rogen (“The 40-Year-Old Virgin”).
• “The Game Plan” – During football practice in preparation for his role as a pro quarterback, star Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson has ruptured an Achilles tendon. He’s slated to undergo surgery FRIDAY in Miami FL. Production, which was scheduled to start next MONDAY in Boston, has been put on hiatus. However, Disney Pictures says it will continue whenever The Rock is able to return.
• “Superman Returns” – Director Brian Singer may add footage to the IMAX version to take advantage of the 20-minutes-worth of 3-D effects created digitally in post-production for the giant-screen prints. He’s considering restoring an entire scene at the beginning of the film showing ‘Superman’ on the gutted planet ‘Krypton’. The movie opens in regular theaters with special 10 pm showings TUESDAY. “Superman Returns: An IMAX 3D Experience” opens WEDNESDAY.
• “Tinker Bell” – Actress Brittany Murphy (“Little Black Book”, “8 Mile”) will provide the voice of the famous fairy from “Peter Pan” in a new Disney production due in 2007. She’s no stranger to animation voice-work – she’s the voice of ‘Luanne’ on FOX-TV’s “King of the Hill”.

MY SAFER SPACE:
Mega-popular online teen site MySpace.com currently has some 87 million users, about a quarter registered as minors. Starting NEXT WEEK, it is initiating some new restrictions to address concerns about the safety of younger users. Among them …
• All users will have the option to prevent contact from people outside their age group.
• All users will have the option to make only partial profiles available to those not on their ‘friends list’.
• Users over 18 can no longer get on a 14- or 15-year-old’s ‘friends list’ unless they already know either the e-mail address or full name.
• Ad-targeting technology will be upgraded so that gambling and other adult-oriented sites will not be advertised on minors’ profile pages.
– AP

RULES FOR SUMMER WORK WEAR:
When the temp rises, inhibitions plummet. But women’s summer wear can either be too revealing or send the message that comfort is more important than business. Experts offer a few simple tips on summer dress codes for women in the workplace …
• Follow the Leader … Whatever the boss wears is okay for you to wear.
• Be Polished … Casual may be cool but your clothes should be clean and pressed.
• Don’t Flash the Flesh … Mini-skirts, tank tops and sheer blouses may get you attention, but likely not the raise or promotion you want.
• Layer Light Fabrics … It’s a classy way to stay cool when summer temperatures soar.
• Have a Cover-Up Ready … Keep a lightweight neutral blazer handy in case the CEO or an important client drops by and you need to look more ‘professional’.
– CareerBuilder.com

BS AMAZING FACT:
Men can read smaller print than women, but women can hear better.

INKED WELL:
Highlights of a new study on body art in the “Journal of the American Academy of Dermatology” …
• 48% of people aged 18-to-29 have either a tattoo or piercing.
• 24% of people aged 18-to-50 (36% of those 18-to-29) now have at least 1 tattoo.
• 14% of people (33% of those 18-to-29) have a body piercing somewhere other than the earlobe.
• 75% of the pierced and 65% of the tattooed had their work done before age 24.
• Nearly 1 in 4 of those with piercings have had medical problems, including skin infections.
• 13% of people with tattoos experienced problems with healing.
And finally, it seems mom was right – people who drink, do drugs or have been jailed are, in fact, more likely to have body art.
– AP

ANTICIPATION:
A recent study from Oxford University finds that anticipation of an event actually heightens the sensation of whatever’s being anticipated. For instance, when a dentist drills your teeth it’s not just the actual pain but the fear of it that hurts. Researchers say this phenomenon also explains why a first kiss can make you light-headed. (Unless you’re kissing a dentist.)
– Reuters

YOU CAN’T MAKE THIS STUFF UP:
• A love-hungry peacock in Gloucestershire, England has been romancing the gas pumps at a service station in the mistaken belief that they’re pea-hens. Whenever a customer uses one of the pumps, the clicking sounds – which apparently resemble the mating cries of a pea-hen – set him off, and he starts displaying his flamboyant plumage.(Guess this bird heard we’re all getting screwed at the pumps these days.)
• Indians by the thousands are descending on a remote village in West Bengal to worship a man who scampers up trees, gobbles up bananas and reportedly has – a tail. It seems they believe he’s a reincarnation of the Hindu monkey god Hanuman and that his 13-inch tail has healing powers. According to local officials, the freak is not a god at all and his ‘tail’ is likely just a congenital defect. (Hey, don’t laugh. These aren’t the first people to lose their head over a piece of tail.)

THE BULL SHEET 06.22.2K6

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1936 [70] Kris Kristofferson, Brownsville TX, sometime movie actor (“Blade: Trinity”)/legendary singer/songwriter (“Me & Bobby McGee”, “Sunday Morning Coming Down”)/Country Music Hall of Fame (2004)

1941 [65] Ed Bradley, Philadelphia PA, CBS news correspondent (“60 Minutes” since 1981)

1948 [58] Todd Rundgren, Upper Darby PA, oldies singer/songwriter/producer (“Hello It’s Me”) now touring with the New Cars (“Not Tonight”)

1949 [57] Meryl (Mary Louise) Streep, Summit NJ, movie actress (“A Prairie Home Companion”, 13 Oscar nominations, 2 wins-“Sophie’s Choice”, “Kramer vs Kramer”)

1952 [54] Graham Greene, Six Nations Reserve ON, movie actor (Oscar nomination-“Dances With Wolves”, “The Green Mile”)/sometime TV actor (“The Red Green Show”)

1957 [49] Garry Beers, Sydney, Australia, rock bassist (INXS-“Pretty Vegas”, “Need You Tonight”)/TV personality (“Rock Star: INXS” 2005)

1964 [42] Dan Brown, Exeter NH, really rich author (“The Da Vinci Code”, which has now sold over 60.5 million copies worldwide)  UP NEXT: A new novel called “The Solomon Key”, about the secret society of Freemasons, expected in 2007.

1970 [36] Steven Page, Toronto ON, pop singer (Barenaked Ladies-“Another Postcard “, “One Week”)

1971 [35] Mary Lynn Rajskub, Detroit MI, TV actress (Chloe O’Brian’ on “24“ since 2004)

1973 [33] Carson Daly, Santa Monica CA, TV host (NBC-“Last Call With Carson Daly” since 2002)

1974 [32] Donald Faison, NYC, TV actor (‘Dr. Christopher Turk’ on “Scrubs” since 2001)

1977 [29] Jai Rodriguez, Brentwood NY, TV personality (“Queer Eye For The Straight Guy” since 2003)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Mirthday”, a day to celebrate individualism and appreciate your own uniqueness. This is the day to make choices that are for your own good. It’s also a good excuse for a ‘Mirthday Party’ … although it kinda sounds like a speech impediment.

• “Stupid Guy Thing Day”. Women are always talking about it (“Oh that’s just another stupid guy thing …”), so here’s the day to commemorate it! Women everywhere are encouraged to make a list of ‘Stupid Guy Things’ and pass it on.

• “Watermelon Thump”, the 53rd annual through Sunday in Luling TX, home of the ‘World Champion Seed-Spitting Contest’ in which the Guinness Record was established at 68-ft, 9 ins. Thanks to their accent, Texans always seem to make a great interview.
PHONER: 830.875.3214 x2 (Susan Ward)
NET: http://www.watermelonthump.com

FRIDAY –
• “Take Your Dog to Work Day”, created by Pet Sitters International in 1999 to give dog owners the opportunity to invite their ‘best friend’ into participating workplaces. Are there jobs where you SHOULDN’T take your dog to work? Neurosurgery, perhaps? (Fortunately, thanks to your SFX library, you can take your dog to work whether you’re allowed to or not.)
PHONER: 336.983.9222 (Pet Sitters International, King NC)
NET: http://www.petsit.com/dogday
NET: http://www.thepoop.com/pooppourri/takedogtowork.asp

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1989 [17] “Batman” opens in movie theaters, starring Michael Keaton as the ‘Caped Crusader’,
Jack Nicholson is as ‘The Joker’, and Kim Basinger as ‘Vicky Vale’

2003 [03] Movie actor Adam Sandler weds Jackie Titone in an outdoor ceremony attended by celebrity friends … and his pet bulldog dressed in a tux

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1847 [159] 1st ‘Doughnut’ (according to legend, doughnuts with a hole in the center were developed for sailors, so they could hook them over the spokes of a ship’s wheel while steering)

1873 [133] PEI joins Canada (adding a few folks and a whole bunch of spuds)

1979 [27] NHL absorbs Winnipeg, Québec, Hartford & Edmonton teams from defunct World Hockey Association (Winnipeg is now in Phoenix, Québec in Colorado, and Hartford in Carolina, leaving Edmonton Oilers as the only original WHA team still in existence)

COMING UP . . .
[Fri] Let It Go Day
[Fri] Pink Day
[Fri] “Click” and “Waist Deep” open in movie theaters
[Sat] St-Jean-Baptiste Day (QC)
[Sun] Grand Prix du Canada (Montréal)
[Sun] Log Cabin Day
[Sun] Gay Pride Day (varies in some cities)
[Tues] 2006 BET Awards
This Week Is … Cheese Week
This Month Is … Perennial Gardening Month

BULL’S BITS

MORE BS QUESTIONS PLAGUING HUMANITY:
• Is ‘tired old cliché’ one of them?
• When you open a new bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?
• If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
• Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
• Is it time to have a telethon FOR Jerry Lewis?

BS PHONE STARTER:
A new Senate report is recommending that CBC-TV become completely commercial-free by boosting its federal funding to make up for the loss of ad revenue. Do you want to give CBC more of your tax money just so it won’t run ads?

Seems like every couple has ‘our song’, the one that reminds them of their first date or a special moment in their relationship. Ask listeners for the strangest ‘our song’.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
My entire family are workaholics. I’m the only relaxaholic.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: 1 in 5 of us is incapable of performing this common physical gesture.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Winking.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
The best vacations are spent near the budget.

BULLSEYE:
Are you getting all of your e-mail? Thanks to out-of-control spam, Internet Service Providers are using ever more aggressive e-mail filters that may sometimes block mail that you want. Here are 2 quick tips to rectify that …
1. Add the sender’s address to your address book (in the case of “BS”, our sending server address is bullmail@cogeco.ca) even if you never intend to send mail to it. Why? In many of today’s e-mail programs, the ‘default setting’ is to reject mail from anyone other than those listed in your address book.
2. Check your e-mail program settings for the option of ‘Safe List’ (aka ‘White List’). This is where you list the senders’ addresses of bulk mailings you wish to receive – newsletters, company memos, etc (again, in our case, that means listing bullmail@cogeco.ca).
If you perform both these functions, you should never miss an issue of “BS” … or any other important mail you count on getting.

Exit mobile version