June 15, 2011

Wednesday, June 15, 2011        Edition: #4528

Good Morning, Sheetheads!


BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:

While playing ‘Catwoman’ in the now-shooting “The Dark Knight Rises”, movie star Anne Hathaway has reportedly clawed through a dozen costumes due to ‘throwing herself around’, including blowing the butt out of one figure-hugging cat-suit (we want out-takes during the credits!) . . . During an interview with a UK newspaper Bill Gates has let it slip that Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is now officially engaged to longtime girlfriend Priscilla Chan (time to update your ‘status’) . . . 65-year-old entertainer Liza Minnelli, who recently cleaned out her house in Lake Tahoe CA, has off-loaded many of the mementoes by hosting a yard sale at a friend’s Long Island NY home (you know the gigs are drying up when …) . . . It’s life imitating art as director David Lynch is planning a real nightclub/cinema in Paris based on ‘Club Silencio’, the fictional venue featured in his movie 2001 “Mulholland Drive” (scheduled to open this September) . . . Sorta singer-turned-quasi-fashion designer Victoria Beckham has asked “Desperate Housewives” actress Eva Longoria to be godmother to the daughter she & her soccer star hubby David are expecting in July (that’ll be kid #4) . . . 24-year-old famous felon Lindsay Lohan spent her 18th day under house arrest by throwing a party, a rooftop barbecue bash at her Venice Beach CA home (if she can’t go to the party, the party will come to her!) . . . Apparently Charlie Sheen is still ‘a thing’, reportedly negotiating to star in a new sitcom for one of the  broadcast TV networks (at least that’s the rumor his people have started) . . . If you want to watch Rebecca Black’s viral hit “Friday” on YouTube, the site is now charging a $2.99 fee (who in their right mind would want to watch it again?) . . . Model Elle McPherson will host & Jessica Simpson will serve as mentor on a new NBC-TV show called “Fashion Star”, which will follow 14 unknown designers as they compete to win a multimillion-dollar contract to launch their own brand (a cheesier “Project Runway”?) . . . And it didn’t take long for comedian Tracy Morgan (“30 Rock”) to change his gay-bashing tune as he now not only says he’d ‘love it’ if his son were gay but has agreed to go join GLAAD in a protest against Tennessee’s controversial ‘Don’t Say Gay’ bill (oh-so-obvious quote: “Sometimes I say really stupid sh-t.”).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Meat Loaf (“Hang Cool Teddy Bear”).
• “Happily Divorced” (TV Land) – Debut of a new comedy about a woman (Fran Drescher) whose husband turns out to be gay. It’s based on her own experience: After 21 years of marriage, Drescher’s husband Peter Marc Jacobson came out in the 1990s. She tells “People” her ex is still her best friend.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Hanson (“Shout It Out”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Broken Bells (“Meyrin Fields”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Cory Monteith (“Glee”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni) – Classic rocker Todd Rundgren.
• “Lopez Tonight” (TBS) – Cee-Lo Green (“The Lady Killer”).
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/CTV) – The finalists perform for the judges in pairs.
• “Stanley Cup Final” (CBC/NBC) – Game 7, from Rogers Arena in Vancouver BC.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – Blake Shelton (“Red River Blue”, to be released July 12th); “American Idol” winner Scotty McCreery.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Aerosmith – Guitarist Joe Perry’s wife Billie has refuted recent rumors that he’s suffering from partial deafness, claiming a recent examination shows he does not have tinnitus nor any hearing loss. (He would have answered the question himself … if he’d heard.)
• Black Eyed Peas –  36-year-old Fergie tells “Allure” magazine she maintains her figure with strenuous workouts but still has to wear 2 sports bras in order to keep ‘her assets’ under control during performances. (Ah, the secret of her humps.)
• Def Leppard / Heart – The classic rock acts co-headline a Summer tour beginning tonight in West Palm Beach, Florida.
• Foo Fighters – They’ve expanded their North American tour in support of “Wasting Light”, adding another 10 dates to the western leg which include Vancouver (10/25), Calgary (10/27), and Edmonton (10/28). Cage The Elephant is the support act for all the October concerts.
• Kanye West – A rep for Mary-Kate Olsen has dismissed reports the former child star is dating West. They were said to be spotted kissing as he recently celebrated his birthday at NYC’s Mercer Hotel. The spokesperson tells GossipCop.com: “There is no truth to the story whatsoever”. (BS translation: They’re engaged.)
• Pearl Jam – Tonight in Providence, Rhode Island frontman Eddie Vedder begins a month-long tour in support of his new solo album “Ukulele Songs”.
• Scissor Sisters – Jake Shears is reportedly writing the music for an upcoming movie adaptation of the late Jim Henson’s vintage kids’ TV show “Fraggle Rock” (1983-87).

PICTURE THIS:
A recent Cornell University study sifted through 35 million Flickr pictures using a  supercomputer to determine photographers’ favorite subjects to cache on the online site. The location most posted is NYC, followed by London and San Francisco. Among landmarks, the most pictured are the Eiffel Tower, Trafalgar Square, Tate Modern Art Gallery, Big Ben, Notre Dame, London Eye, and the Empire State Building. 28th on the list? The glass-encased Apple Store on Fifth Avenue in midtown Manhattan … which somehow beats out the Statue of Liberty. (Not making the list … the water tower in Podunk, Saskatchewan.)
– “The Observer”

BS SIGNS A GUY WILL MAKE A GREAT DAD:
• He treats his mother well. Experts say respect for family should be at the top of the ‘what to look for’ list.
• He’s selfless. The #1 thing you learn as a parent … you don’t come first anymore.
• He’s not easily grossed out. Kids fill diapers and spit up … sometimes at the same time.
• He’s a great uncle. Nephews and nieces are the stepping stones to having your own kids.
• He’s fun. You’ve got to have a sense of humor to get through life with kids.
– Match.com

EARLY EDGE:
According to one of the biggest, longest follow-up studies of its kind, kids who attend preschool are less likely to abuse drugs in later life, are involved in fewer arrests, and get better jobs as adults. Researchers tracked more than 1,000 low-income Chicago, Illinois residents for up to 25 years. The kids who went to pre-K were also more likely to finish high school, and more went on to higher education. (Was it really a head start or just a haven from hard life in the projects?)
– HuffingtonPost.com

TOO STUPID FOR US TO MAKE UP:
• 34-year-old Zane Whitmore of Portland, Oregon has been pierced through the flesh on his shoulder blades 4 times, then suspended by those piercings from a hot air balloon 10,000 feet above the ground for 75 minutes. Some sort of sadistic punishment? Nope. It’s a stunt that’s part of a feature-length documentary called “Feet Off the Ground”. Planning for the hot air balloon ride took about 2 years. Production on the doc will wrap by the end of this Summer and it will premiere in 2012. (Pity the poor people who auditioned and didn’t get the gig!)
– KATU.com
• Since 2006 conceptual artist Cherry Tree, who splits her time between Missouri and Spain, has been making perfume from … her own urine. She claims it smells really good after you eat a lot of honey but smells terrible after eating chicken. Don’t get too excited, because she’s not selling the product … yet. So why’s she do it? She’s very much into recycling and thinks urine is something that needs to be recycled as it’s something that gets eliminated. (After 5 years, she’s become a real whiz at it!)
– AOL News

BROWN EYES BLEARIER:
A new Georgia State University study that examined data from 10,000 people has found that those with lighter eye colors consume significantly more alcohol than dark-eyed peers. The research seems to confirm the hypothesis that lighter-eyed people are more resistant to the effects of alcohol. It’s the latest in a series of studies to find an association between dark eyes and greater sensitivity to drugs and alcohol. (Especially dark red.)
– AskMen.com

POLITELY POLLUTED:
According to the book, “How to Live Like a Gentleman”, here’s what to do if you find yourself too tipsy at a social event …
• Talk as little as possible.
• Call a taxi and leave as soon you can.
• No matter how tempted, DON’T give a toast.
• Leave all your clothes on, including your tie.
• When the time comes to walk, set goals for yourself: First get to the next table, and so on.
• Aside from a brief ‘thanks’ as you leave, do NOT attempt to thank your host. Call, e-mail, or write a letter later.
– “Facts & Arguments”

BS BUZZWORDS:
New terms leaking into the lingo …
• ‘Brony’ [‘bro’ + ‘pony’] – An adult male fan of the kids’ cartoon “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic”. These are not rare men, but a legion of dedicated fans with websites and news services devoted to the cartoon, which is intended for a much younger audience.
• ‘Quadding’ – Riding a 4-wheel all-terrain vehicle (aka a ‘quad’ or a ‘quad bike’). While these ATVs can cost upwards of $10,000, quadders often have trouble making use of them as they are banned in many urban areas.
• ‘SoHo Effect’ – When the artists who made a neighborhood cool and exciting are forced to move out because they cannot afford the rents after the area becomes gentrified. Named for the SoHo area of NYC.

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• Wearing high heels can increase the risk of arthritis.
• Parrots are good at teamwork.
– BBC News

BS CHRONOMETER 06.15.11


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1954 [57] Jim Belushi, Chicago IL, TV actor (“The Defenders” 2010-11, “According to Jim” 2001-09)/movie actor (“The Ghost Writer”, “K-9”)/brother of late actor-comedian John Belushi

1963 [48] Helen Hunt, LA CA, movie actress (“Soul Surfer”, Oscar-“As Good As It Gets”)/TV actress (“Mad About You” 1992-99)

1964 [47] Courteney Cox, Birmingham AL, TV actress (“Cougar Town” since 2009, “Dirt” 2007, “Friends” 1994-2004)/movie actress (“Scream” movies)/estranged Mrs David Arquette

1966 [45] Michael Britt, Fort Worth TX, country singer/guitarist (Lonestar-“You’re Like Comin’ Home”, “Mr Mom”)

1969 [42] Ice Cube (O’Shea Jackson), LA CA, movie actor (“Are We There Yet?”, “Barbershop”)/rapper (“Pushin’ Weight”)

1973 [38] Neil Patrick Harris, Albuquerque NM, TV actor (‘Barney Stinson on “How I Met Your Mother” since 2005)/2011 Tony Awards host

1975 [36] Elizabeth Reaser, Bloomfield MI, movie actress (‘Esme Cullen’ in the “Twilight” films)/TV actress (“The Ex-List” 2008-09, “Grey’s Anatomy” 2007-08)

1976 [35] Gary Lightbody, Bangor, Northern Ireland, alt-rock singer (Snow Patrol-“Signal Fire”, “Chasing Cars”)

1981 [30] Billy Martin, Naptown MD, pop-rock guitarist (Good Charlotte-“The River”, “Hold On”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Global Wind Day”, a worldwide event that occurs annually on June 15th. It’s a day for promoting wind, its power, and the possibilities it holds to change our world.
NET: http://www.globalwindday.org

• “National Man Day”, begun by a pair of Indiana guys in 2008 and popularized via Facebook and their website. (Similar to ‘Stupid Guy Thing Day’, coming up June 22nd.)
NET: www.thereturnofman.com

• “Nature Photography Day”, saluting a favorite hobby of camera buffs. (Please, show us those 8,200 photos of squirrels again?)

• “Power Of a Smile Day”, recognizing the 2nd-best thing you can do with your lips.

• “Strawberry Moon”, the Full Moon of June, named for the relatively short season for harvesting strawberries.

• “World Elder Abuse Awareness Day”, the 6th annual when we’re encouraged to show the world we care about ending elder abuse and neglect by wearing something purple for the day.
NET: http://www.inpea.net/images/weaad_Press_Release.pdf

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1994 [17] Disney’s “The Lion King” opens in movie theaters (a landmark event for today’s 20-somethings)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1956 [55] 15-year-old John Lennon meets 13-year-old Paul McCartney (The Beatles ensue)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1995 [16] Canadian Richard Weber & Russian Mikhail Malakhov become 1st to ski to the North Pole and return to land without support teams or outside help (an achievement yet to be repeated)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2004 [07] Detroit Pistons humiliate LA Lakers 100-87 in Game 5 of the NBA Finals for their first title in 14 years (one of the biggest surprises in NBA finals history … until this year)

COMING UP . . .
[Thurs] Recess At Work Day
[Fri] “Green Lantern”; “Mr Popper’s Penguins” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Work@Home Fathers Day
[Sat] International Sushi Day
[Sat] World Juggling Day
[Sun] 2011 MuchMusic Video Awards
[Sun] Fathers Day
This Week Is … Meet a Mate Week
This Month Is … Adopt a Shelter Cat Month

BULL’S BITS


BS PROBLEMS WITH DRIVING AN ELECTRIC CAR:
• Turning on the headlights drops the top speed to 15 mph.
• Can’t drive it in the bathtub.
• Go over 60 for even a minute and you have to pull over so the car can use an asthma inhaler.
• Gasoline bills were nothing compared to what you’re now spending on extension cords.
• If you’re hit by lightning, the car accelerates to the speed of light.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
The secret of returning from Las Vegas with a small fortune is to take a large fortune with you.

BS ‘TITLE BOUT’:
Have 2 contestants play off against each other to come up with the most titles in each category. Let them alternate back and forth until one is stumped, then move on to the next category. Keep a running score. A few suggested categories …
• Titles of Lady Gaga songs.
• Names of videogames.
• Things you call your father.
• Titles awarded to royalty.
• Superhero movie titles.
• Titles awarded in sports championships.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: The average parent spends a total of 6-and-a-half days a year doing THIS.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Driving the kids around.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Live now … procrastinate tomorrow.

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