Monday, June 1, 2020 Edition: #6709
Sheeters Always Prosper!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Forbes magazine, which once called Kylie Jenner the “youngest-ever self-made billionaire,” has stripped her of the title. The magazine now claims the youngest member of the Kardashian-Jenner crew was “inflating the size and success of her business” and has been doing so “for years.” Forbes is slamming Kylie and her family, including momager Kris Jenner, who they say perpetuated the lie. Jenner responded on Twitter, saying, “’I’ve never asked for any title or tried to lie my way there EVER” and there are “100 things more important right now than fixating on how much money I have.” (Then she put her phone down and resumed counting her money…)
-Yahoo
★ “Duck Dynasty” star Phil Robertson has admitted to cheating on his wife after discovering he has an adult daughter from a past affair. He married Kay Robertson 54 years ago and his daughter, Phyliss, is now 45. He had no idea of her existence until she wrote the reality star’s sons – Jase and Alan – and revealed who she is. Phil ended up having a DNA test, which was determined to be a 99.9% match. They met up and she has since been introduced to the Duck Dynasty family. Phil remains married to Kay.
-Metro
★ Julianne Hough and her husband, former NHL’er Brooks Laich, have officially split after 2 years of marriage. The couple issued a joint statement reading: “We have lovingly and carefully taken the time we have needed to arrive at our decision to separate. We share an abundance of love and respect for one another and will continue to lead with our hearts from that place…” In December, Laich revealed on Instagram that one of his goals for this year was to explore his own sexuality.
-Yahoo
★ Ryan Gosling is getting set to sink his teeth into ‘The Wolfman’. He’s attached to star in a remake of the classic monster movie. It’s unknown what the new take on “Wolfman” will look like, though it is believed to be set in present times and in the vein of Jake Gyllenhaal’s thriller “Nightcrawler,” with an obvious supernatural twist.
-Variety
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Lady Gaga, Little Big Town
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Chris Hayes, Brian Wilson
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Anna Kendrick, Action Bronson
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Keegan-Michael Key, Todrick Hall, Doja Cat
• “Conan” (TBS): Lisa Kudrow
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): “Below Deck Sailing Yacht” reunion
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Sen. Tammy Duckworth, Magic Johnson (R)
• “The Talk” (CBS): Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Kristin Chenoweth
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Amanda Peet, Dr. Jennifer Ashton
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Jennifer Garner, the Killers
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Derek Hough, Dr. Terry Dubrow, Dr. Paul Nassif
• “Celebrity Family Feud” (ABC): Celebrity contestants include Victoria’s Secret Angels; past “The Bachelorette” suitors Gaten Matarazzo, Maddie Ziegler and Mackenzie Ziegler
• “Iconic: TLC” (CW): Musicians LOCASH, Ceraadi, MAX and Ally Brooke perform covers of TLC’s biggest hits; TLC selects one to collaborate with in a final, show-stopping performance.
• “90 Day Fiancé: Self-Quarantined” (TLC): Season 1 finale
• “The Baker and the Beauty” (ABC): Season 1 finale
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Ed Sheeran – is brewing his own beer. He is now making craft beer for friends and family to enjoy at his pub “The Lancaster Lock”, which is situated on the grounds of his compound in Suffolk, England. Sheeran has also been enjoying beekeeping and gardening amid the Covid-19 lockdown.
• Lady Gaga — pulled the plug on a planned virtual album playback party on Friday because of the violence in Minnesota. She had planned to host a listening session for her new release, “Chromatica”, but postponed the online fan get together in light of current events.
• Mariah Carey — took to social media on Saturday to sing a snippet of her 1990 song ‘There’s Got to Be a Way’ while demanding justice for George Floyd, the black man who was recently killed by a white police officer in Minneapolis.
• Def Leppard – An official statement will be issued today regarding the status of their scheduled “The Stadium Tour” with Mötley Crüe, Poison and Joan Jett. The tour is scheduled to kick off June 18 in Jacksonville, Florida. Most concerts and festivals have been canceled or rescheduled due to the pandemic. • KISS – Collaborator Bob Kulick has died at 70. The guitarist-producer, who also recorded with Lou Reed and Meat Loaf, initially tried out for the then-unknown KISS in 1972, but Ace Frehley beat him for the job. Over the years, he was used as a hired gun when Frehley could not or would not show up for recording sessions. A cause of death hasn’t been revealed.
• Alice Cooper — has been learning to tap-dance during quarantine. He’s been in quarantine with his wife, children and grandchildren, and he says: ”We have a friend who’s a great tap dancer, and every Wednesday night, he has an hour-long online class. So the whole family goes in the backyard where we have all this plywood on the ground, and everybody’s got tap shoes on…”
• Neil Young – has announced plans to release official versions of some commonly bootlegged live albums. He says his releases will be of higher quality because they will be “coming from our original master tapes”. Planned releases include “I’m Happy That Y’All Came Down” and “Rubber Dubber”, both recorded about 50 years ago.
• Carrie Underwood – scared herself while experimenting with TikTok’s “reality ripple.” It’s a type of thermal scan that creates an infrared trail when picking up a person’s body heat. In a video shot at her cabin, she explains that she is “looking for ghosts”, when suddenly, a shape can be seen in the corner of the room, reappearing each time she pans over to it. In a second vid, Underwood admits, “I’m super freaked out right now — super freaked out.”
• Maren Morris – Her song ‘The Bones’ has set a record by spending 12 weeks at No. 1 on Billboard’s Hot Country Songs chart. That’s the most by a female artist, surpassing Taylor Swift’s ‘We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together’, which spent 10 weeks at the top in 2012.
DRIVING YOUR SPELL-CHECK CRAZY:
How do you change the meaning of a word? Strrrrettttch it out, according to researchers who analyzed 100 billion tweets. The study, by University of Vermont’s department of Mathematics & Statistics, determined that Twitter users stretch words such as “yes”, “dude” and “hey” to modify their meaning. The linguist experts say stretched words that convey a different meaning than the original are common in social media, but rare in formal writing. For instance, “suuuuure” can imply sarcasm, “duuuuude” can be a sign of incredulity, “yeeessss” may indicate excitement and “heellllp” may be a sign of desperation. Despite being an important part of spoken language, such as a soccer commentator drawing out the word “gooooooooooaaaallll!” – stretched words are rarely found in normal spoken word. But with the rise of social media, stretched words have finally found their way into large-scale written text, according to the researchers. Other “stretched” words highlighted in the study include “heyyyy” to signify relaxation, overconfidence or flirtation and “arrrrggggggghhhhhh” to mean immense pain.
(If you’ve never seen the word “arrrrrggggghhhh” in print before, you just haven’t read enough Spider-Man comics!)
(Now could someone explain why some people put a bunch of ‘E’s at the end of the word “love”?)
(100 billion tweets? Isn’t that strrretttching it just a bit?)
-DailyMail
HEEL THE MASSES:
Today is “Go Barefoot Day”. And maybe this is a good chance to remind you of a study that found that wearing shoes indoors is a straight-up bad idea. That’s unless your shoes are strictly “indoors”, as they say in kindergarten. Why? Bacteria. Lots of it. A University of Arizona study found an average of 421,000 different bacteria growing on shoes – with 96% of them harboring fecal matter. (How’s your breakfast so far?) The study also indicated that bacteria can be tracked by shoes over long distances inside your home. Kelly Reynolds, Ph.D., a microbiologist who was involved in the study, said: “We walk through things like bird droppings, dog waste and germs on public restroom floors, all of which are sources for E. coli.” The study went on to see how much of this nastiness was spread onto our floors at home when we fail to take off our shoes, and the answer is between 90%-99%.
(At least that means you’ll be leaving the house the next morning with clean shoes!)
(No problem. Just like my pants, my shoes haven’t left the house in months…)
(Also a little food-for-thought for those who like to walk around outside with no shoes on…)
-DidYouKnowFacts
RE-STORED:
Costco is bringing back the free samples, but it won’t be the same as it was. After temporarily discontinuing the practice in early March due to the pandemic, CFO Richard Galanti has revealed Costco is planning to once again offer free samples at its warehouses — but only on a “slow rollout basis.” The company will resume offering the treats in mid-June, but pointed out that people will not be invited to pick up open samples with their fingers, as they once could.
(How can I eat a free sample with this mask on?)
(I’m glad to hear that. It just didn’t feel right to be shopping there without a tiny napkin in my hand!)
-NYPost
CELEBS’ ORIGINAL LAST NAMES:
➢ Blake Lively – Blake Brown
➢ Joaquín Phoenix — Joaquín Bottom
➢ Guy Fieri – Guy Ferry
➢ Olivia Wilde – Olivia Cockburn
➢ Aaron Paul — Aaron Sturtevant (Paul is his middle name)
➢ Tom Cruise – Tom Mapother IV (Cruise is his middle name)
➢ Lea Michele – Lea Sarfati (Michele is her middle name)
➢ Michael Keaton – Michael Douglas
➢ Natalie Portman – Natalie Hershlag
➢ Ralph Lauren – Ralph Lishitz
BS FAST ‘NAME’ FACT: Weezer’s Rivers Cuomo has a brother named ‘Leaves’. For a time, Joaquín Phoenix was known as ‘Leaf’ and had a famous brother named ‘River’.
(OK, radio people…’fess up – what’s yours?)
-Buzzfeed
DID YOU KNOW?
A gang of monkeys attacked a laboratory assistant and escaped with a batch of coronavirus test samples in India. The bizarre incident saw the troop of primates launch their assault near Meerut Medical College in Delhi. According to local media, the animals then snatched COVID-19 test samples from three patients and fled. One of the monkeys was later spotted in a tree chewing one of the sample collection kits.
-YahooNews
BS CHRONOMETER 06.01.20
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1937 [83] Morgan Freeman, Memphis TN, movie actor (“The Shawshank Redemption” “Dark Knight Trilogy”, Academy Award-“Million Dollar Baby”)/COMING UP…”The Comeback Trail”
1947 [73] Ronnie Wood, Hillingdon UK, classic rock guitarist (Rolling Stones since 1975 [‘Start Me Up’], The Faces 1970-73, Jeff Beck Group 1968-70)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1989)
1953 [67] Ronnie Dunn, Coleman TX, country singer (Brooks & Dunn-‘Boot Scootin’ Boogie’)
1973 [47] Heidi Klum [‘kloom’], Bergisch-Gladbach Germany, fashion model/TV personality (“America’s Got Talent” since 2013, “Project Runway” 2004-17)
1974 [46] Alanis Morissette, Ottawa ON, pop singer (‘You Oughta Know’, ‘Ironic’)/her “Jagged Little Pill” album (1995) sold over 33 million worldwide
1981 [39] Brandi Carlile, Ravensdale WA, alt-country singer-songwriter (‘The Joke’, ‘The Story’, w/The Highwomen-‘Redesigning Women’)
1981 [39] Amy Schumer, New York NY, comedian-actress (“Trainwreck, “Snatched”)
1996 [24] Tom Holland, Kingston England, movie actor (“Spider-Man: Homecoming” “Spider-Man: Far From Home”)/stage actor (“Billy Elliot the Musical”) COMING UP…”The Devil All the Time”
2000 [20] Willow Shields, Albuquerque NM, movie actress (‘Primrose Everdeen’ in “The Hunger Games” movies)
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Dare Day”, a day to do something that you have been wanting to do but couldn’t get up the courage to try. (Once I dared a woman to ask me out. So she asked me to leave!)
• “Flip a Coin Day”, a day of easy decision making. Just flip and follow the results. (Or ask Siri to do it for you…)
• “Global Day of Parents”, a UN observance since 2012 to honor all parents and appreciate their selfless commitment to their children.
• “International Children’s Day”, first proclaimed in 1925 by the World Conference For the Well-Being of Children in Geneva, Switzerland. The day is designed to draw attention to any and all children’s issues. (If it’s both Parents Day and Children’s Day, we just might have a problem…)
• “Go Barefoot Day”, a day to enjoy the comforts and pleasant sensations of shedding footwear. Why? Because it feels great! The members of the ‘Society For Barefoot Living’ believe you should go barefoot all the time.
• “Heimlich Maneuver Day”, honoring the ‘abdominal thrust’ method of stopping choking, first described by Dr Henry Heimlich in a June 1974 article in the journal “Emergency Medicine”. BS FACTOID: In 2016, 96-year-old Heimlich used the technique himself for the first time when a female resident at his retirement home in Cincinnati OH was choking. Heimlich died in December, 2016. (Of a heart attack, in case you were wondering.)
• “Say Something Nice Day”, a day to thank someone, encourage someone, compliment everyone. Remember, if you can’t say something nice … mum’s the word!
• “Oscar The Grouch Day”, celebrating Oscar the Grouch’s birthday, the day on which he is the grouchiest. Episode 3,866 of Sesame Street revealed that Oscar’s birthday is on June 1st.
COMING UP . . .
[Tues] National Bubba Day
[Tues] National Rotisserie Chicken Day
[Wed] National Egg Day
[Wed] Global Running Day
This Week Is…National Gardening Week
This Month Is…National Camping Month
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2008 [12] Fashion designer Yves Saint Laurent dies in Paris, France at age 71
2009 [11] Conan O’Brien debuts as host of NBC-TV’s “Tonight Show” (steps down after 7 months due to a dispute with the network … and a $33-million payoff)
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2005 [15] White Stripes singer Jack White marries his girlfriend, British model Karen Elson, in a canoe on the Amazon River in Brazil
2017 [03] Thanks to the song by Eminem, the word “stan” is added to the Oxford American Dictionary, defined as “an overzealous or obsessive fan of a particular celebrity.”
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1980 [40] CNN, the Cable News Network, is launched
TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
2002 [18] 16 skydivers set a new world record by jumping simultaneously from a hot-air balloon 10,000 ft (3,048 m) over Peterborough, England and landing safely on 6,000 rolls of bathroom tissue (a publicity stunt)
2009 [11] General Motors files for Chapter 11 bankruptcy in the 4th-largest bankruptcy in US history
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ If aircraft carriers ran on gasoline, they’d get about 6 inches to the gallon.
✓ The first Harley-Davidson motorcycle, built in 1903, used a tomato can for a carburetor.
✓ The wad of cotton on the end of a Q-tip is called the bud.
✓ Cats make about 100 different sounds. Dogs make about 10.
✓ Harry Houdini was buried in the coffin he used in his magic act.
✓ (***Caution: “fart”***) Astronauts cannot burp in zero gravity, but they can fart.
-FactRetriever, BathroomReadersInstitute
BS HOME-SCHOOL BUMPER STICKERS:
• Honk if you’re not going anywhere but needed to get away from the kids
• Nobody really cares what time the train left Chicago
• My Kid can Quote more Tiger King than Yours
• I just let my kid skip seven grades. Happy Graduation to us!
• My homeschooled student didn’t make the baseball team, but DID take second in towel folding.
• We Googled everything
• My drinking team has a math problem
-Twitter
TODAY’S SLICE OF BS:
➠ According to research, going out alone is just as enjoyable as going out with friends. (The results of the study may be skewed, however, because it was conducted exclusively among cat owners…)
➠ Khloé Kardashian is selling her luxury Calabasas estate for $18,900,000. (You can tell it’s the a “Kardashian house” because it looks nice on the outside, but there’s nothing going on upstairs!)
➠ I saw a study that found handsome guys don’t get as many job offers because they intimidate potential bosses. (Thank you, science, for my new response to the often-asked question, “Why don’t you have a job?”)
➠ A study shows that over 50% of people don’t trust their neighbors . . . and 25% don’t know who their neighbors are. (Both of these are true for me. Which is really weird. . . because normally I trust people I’ve seen naked…)
➠ According to a study, people who wear formal business clothes to work produce better results. (Except for strippers!)
BS WEB GOODIE:
Just cats being cats: https://tinyurl.com/yb39uugt
BS PHONE STARTER:
What is one thing you should NOT do if you win the lottery?
BS RANDOM JOKE:
When someone asks what I did over the weekend, I squint and ask, “Why, what did you hear?”
BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
• Which name for a collective group is incorrect?
a) Islands: a chain
b) Onions: a tear [INCORRECT]
c) Jewels: a cache
d) Guns: a battery
(A group of onions is referred to as a ‘rope’)
• What is the name of the company that developed the “Mario Kart” video game?
a) Nintendo [CORRECT]
b) Electronic Arts (EA)
c) SEGA
d) Intellivision
• Johnny Depp is famously afraid of what?
a) Spiders
b) Clowns [CORRECT]
c) Heights
d) Eyeliner
-TinyOnline, ThoughtCatalog
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: According to a new study, men are 4 times more likely to lose THIS than women. What is it?
Answer: Their hearing
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
If you change nothing, nothing will change.
