Wednesday, March 13, 2024 – Edition: #7676

Hey! New Sheets!

 

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Christopher Nolan’s payday for “Oppenheimer” is…well…exploding. The director-producer took home 2 Oscars on Sunday night, and a report by Variety says his final earnings for the film, which traces the life of scientist J. Robert Oppenheimer and his role in creating the atomic bomb, is just south of $100 million. That figure represents a combination of salary, backend compensation, box-office escalators and a bonus for his Academy Awards. The film — which nabbed 7 Oscars total, was made on a budget of $100 million. After its release on July 19, it earned $958 million worldwide, especially impressive considering its R rating and 3-hour running time.
-Variety
★ Kate Beckinsale shared that she was hospitalized, in a UK Mother’s Day tribute to her mom, Judy Loe. The “Serendipity” star posted a slideshow on Instagram that included photos of herself in a hospital bed, though she didn’t offer an explanation. She captioned her post: Happy birthday and UK Mother’s Day…to my incredible mother. Thank you to those that love us and support us when it’s (crap), and try to make sure there are some bits that aren’t.” It went on, but you get the idea. The slideshow also featured photos of her mom with a birthday cake as well as enjoying a glass of Champagne. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yeyjejyd
-PageSix
★ “The First Omen” is nearly here — and 20th Century Studios just released a creepy new trailer. A prequel to the 1976 Richard Donner-directed classic, The First Omen stars Nell Tiger Free as an American in Rome who is working at an orphanage before becoming a nun. It us there that she uncovers a sinister plot to birth the antichrist. The film also stars Sônia Braga, Ralph Ineson, Bill Nighy, Tawfeek Barhom and Charles Dance. Arkasha Stevenson directs the film, which hits theaters on April 5. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mbsz933k
-TheWrap
★ The long-awaited sequel to legendary mockumentary “This Is Spinal Tap” is now in production, almost 40 years to the day that the original film was released in 1984. The feature is shooting in New Orleans, with Rob Reiner directing and Christopher Guest, Michael McKean and Harry Shearer all reprising their iconic roles as the legendary heavy metal band. The production has also confirmed its cameos, with Questlove and Trisha Yearwood joining the already-announced lineup of Elton John, Paul McCartney and Garth Brooks.
-Variety
★ Conan O’Brien’s new streaming series will debut April 18 on Max. The international travel series “Conan O’Brien Must Go” will feature the former late-night host visiting new friends he’s met via his podcast “Conan O’Brien Needs a Fan”. There will be 4 episodes in season 1. The series’ debut comes 3 years after it was announced that O’Brien would leave his post as late-night TV’s elder statesman and resurface on Max with a weekly variety series. LINK: https://youtu.be/0oPDBb-JER4
-TVLine

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” (ABC/Global): Michael Keaton, Ramy Youssef, Briston Maroney
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Angela Bassett, Noel Fielding, Mitch Rowland, Ben Harper
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Paul Rudd, Cecilia Vega
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Caroline Rhea, Matt Rogers, James Davis
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Kristen Stewart, Walton Goggins, Aric Improta
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Carrie Coon, Patton Oswalt
• “The Daily Show” (COM): TBA
• “The View” (ABC/CTV):  Gov. Kathy Hochul (D-N.Y.)
• “The Talk” (CBS): Chris Hardwick, Malika Andrews
• “Live With Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV):  Angela Bassett, Tig Notaro
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Melissa Benoist, MAX featuring Huh Yunjin
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson , Jeremy Ford
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Jesse Palmer, Shaun Robinson
• “The Amazing Race” (CBS): Season 36 premiere. Teams participate in a rodeo in Mexico; racers go paragliding in Colombia and rally car racing in Argentina.
• “The Masked Singer” (Fox): The Wizard of Oz Night, LeAnn Rimes performs
• “Abbott Elementary” (ABC): Janine spearheads a pilot program that brings a librarian to Abbott; Melissa and Jacob deal with some big changes at home.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Beyoncé – Dolly Parton has let it slip that Bey has recorded a cover of her 1974 hit ‘Jolene’, which could appear on her upcoming country album. “Renaissance Act II”, out March 29, has already yielded the hit singles ‘Texas Hold ’Em’ and ’16 Carriages’.
• Olivia Rodrigo – welcomed Sheryl Crow to the stage during her “Guts World Tour” stop in Nashville on Saturday. The 2 performed a duet version of Crow’s 1996 hit ‘If It Makes You Happy’. Before bringing her guest to the stage, Rodrigo called Crow “one of the most talented, most wonderful, kindest human beings I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting.” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/5aed4u29
• Ozzy Osbourne – has a collab with Billy Idol guitarists Billy Morrison and Steve Stevens coming. ‘Crack Cocaine’ arrives on March 21, as does a video featuring appearances by Paris Jackson, RISK, and Jeff Hilliard. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/4539fkf2
• Gordon Lightfoot – 11,000 fans have signed a Change.org petition to name the 400 highway north of Toronto ON, or a part of it, “The Gordon Lightfoot Memorial Highway.” The 400 leads toward his hometown of Orillia ON. (How about “The Gordon Lightfoot Carefree Highway”???)  LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3p8zk94y
• Jon Bon Jovi and the Eagles – are 2 of the artists confirmed to play at the upcoming Jimmy Buffet tribute concert at the Hollywood Bowl on April 11. “Keep The Party Going: A Tribute to Jimmy Buffett” will also feature performances by Paul McCartney, Brando Carlile, Eric Church, Kenny Chesney, and many more.
• Brantley Gilbert – lets his country-rock roots shine in his new single ‘Off the Rails’. Upcoming tour dates include Canton OH, Saginaw MI, and La Crosse WI, all next week. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3u6udcv2
• Lainey Wilson and Keith Urban – are featured in a tongue-in-cheek Instagram video, where he takes her to the airport for her tour of his native Australia. When she asks about the spiders, he tells her to beware of the “little ones”, because they are deadly – and “love toilet seats”. She also mentions that she has “all her thongs” packed, before realizing that they are referred to as “flip-flops” down under. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/53j5zn6w
• Jelly Roll – is featured in a new Uber Eats commercial, and this time, as a part of the company’s “Don’t Forget” campaign, he’s forgotten how to eat a banana properly. You have to see it. It’s kind of gross. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/4hbvzad4

SHOOTING THE BULL

A TIP ABOUT TIPPING:
You know how when you get your bill after eating at a restaurant, the server sometimes writes a little “Thank you” at the bottom, and maybe draws a little smiley-face? Well, get used to seeing a lot more smiley faces – only these ones will be visible on the payment terminal. Why? Well, a new study has found that including positive emojis makes customers tip more. The research, published in the International Journal of Hospitality Management, determined that a payment terminal’s inclusion of a happy face emoji can boost service tips by up to 30%. In a series of tests, full-service restaurants experienced a tipping average increase of 2% with the presence of emojis on the payment terminal. But a food delivery app saw tips jump by 9.9%, and, most significantly, take-out services saw their tips skyrocket by 30%. Experts say that, just like being smiled at by an actual person, virtual smiles activate a region of the brain closely associated with facial perception.
(…so can I get a discount by selecting the “frown emoji” option?)
(Can you imagine the tips they’d get if they used one of the more “questionable” emojis instead?)
-BNN

OFFICE PROS:
With more and more workers heading back into the office these days, as risks from the pandemic ease, employers are having to address a new issue: Some people have forgotten how to behave. And that’s why in-office etiquette training is becoming a thing. It would seem that some workers have brought their at-home habits back to the office with them, and others – well, let’s just say they never behaved very professionally in the first place. One US survey found that more than 60% of companies plan to implement etiquette courses for staff this year. Some of the most common workplace faux-pas that etiquette experts are reminding workers about include:
• Not being mindful of their volume while on the phone
• Leaving a mess around the office
• Inappropriate office conversations
• Inappropriate attire
• Novel-length emails, and
• “People sending emojis and acronyms that might have double (or) triple meanings”
(I’m not sure why they need professionals to teach us what we all should already know. It all boils down to this: Treat everyone with the respect they deserve. And don’t touch my freaking stapler!)
(Nothing about TikTok or Amazon there? Perfect. I’m all good!)
-CNN

FELINE FEE FORGIVENESS:
A library in Massachusetts says it will forgive overdue book charges – if you bring in a picture of your cat. During March, the Worcester Public Library is offering to “scratch” fees off a book borrower’s record, as a way of encouraging people to read – and to visit the library, even if they owe money for a lost or damaged book. It’s called the “Feline Fee Forgiveness” program — part of the library’s month-long “March Meowness” event. Pictures contributed will be added to an in-branch display. And the cat pic you bring doesn’t even have to specifically feature ‘your’ cat.
(This is great news. Because there are a whole bunch of them in that book of cat photos that I forgot to return!)
(So, it’s kinda like they’re making a card-cat-alogue?)
-Fox

ACTUAL LAW FIRMS:
It would seem that sometimes, when lawyers decide to go into business together, they either don’t realize – or they don’t care what their names sound like together . . . (***Caution: preview***)
☞ Payne & Fears (California)
☞ Low, Ball & Lynch (California)
☞ Smart & Biggar (Ontario)
☞ Bickers & Bickers (Pennsylvania)
☞ Boring & Coy (Indiana)
☞ Slappy & Sad (Georgia)
☞ Sexter & Warmflash (New York)
☞ Titsworth & Grabbe (Georgia)
☞ Walkup & Downing (California)
☞ Butts & Butts (Virginia)
☞ Rush, Rush & Delay (Arkansas)
☞ Lawless & Lawless (California)
☞ Weiner & Cox (Michigan)
☞ Lies & Bullis (North Dakota)
-BathroomReadersInstitute

STUPIDLY SPECIFIC ENGLISH WORDS:
➠ Defenestration (v): The action of throwing someone out the window.
➠ Rhotacism (n): Excessive use of the letter “R”.
➠ Lingible (adj): Meant to be licked.
➠ Whipjack (n): A beggar, specifically one who is pretending to be shipwrecked.
➠ Yerd (v): To beat an object with a stick.
➠ Roddikin (n): The fourth stomach of a cow or deer.
➠ Balbriggan (n): A type of fine cotton, most often used in underwear.
➠ Cornobble (v): To slap or beat another person with a fish.
-CollinsDictionary, Phrontistery

DID YOU KNOW?
A mysterious signal that for a decade was widely believed to be a sign of alien life – was probably noise from a loud truck, researchers from Johns Hopkins University say. Initially believed to be from a meteor fireball that shot out near Papua New Guinea, the new information also throws cold water on speculation by a Harvard physicist that ocean-recovered materials were of extraterrestrial origin. As the leader of the Hopkins team, who is a seismologist, pointed out: “The signal changed directions over time, exactly matching a road that runs past the seismometer.”
-NYPost

BS CHRONOMETER 03.13.24

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Good Samaritan Day”, on this date in 1964, Queens NY bar manager Kitty Genovese was stabbed to death while 38 people looked the other way, not wanting to get involved. Since then, every US state and many other countries have enacted Good Samaritan laws in some form or another.
• “Donald Duck Day”, marking the cartoon character’s debut on this day in 1934 as a bit player in the Walt Disney cartoon “The Little Wise Hen”. Donald Duck is the most published comic book character in the world, outside of the superhero genre. (For some reason, there is also A “Donald Duck Day” in June.)
• “Chicken Noodle Soup Day”, one of the best-smelling holidays I can think of!
• “Open an Umbrella Indoors Day”, when celebrants are encouraged to challenge the old superstition and note whether any bad luck befalls them. The superstition can be traced to the 11th century BC.
• “Registered Dietitian Nutritionist Day”, a part of Nutrition Month, to increase awareness about registered dietitian nutritionists (RDNs) as “indispensable providers of food and nutrition services.”
• “Earmuffs Day”, celebrating the first ‘Earmuffs’ patent by Chester Greenwood of Farmington, Maine on this day in 1877.
• “Ken Day”, celebrating the Ken doll, whose full name is Kenneth Carson. He was named after Ken Handler, the son of Ruth and Elliot Handler. They were 2 of the founders of Mattel, and it was Ruth who invented the Barbie Doll.
• “K-9 Veterans Day”, honoring all dogs who have served in the military. The US Army launched its ‘K-9 Corps’ 81 years ago today (1942).
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] Pi Day
[Thurs] Potato Chip Day
[Fri] Peanut Lovers Day
[Sat] Maple Syrup Saturday
This Week is…Sunshine Week
This Month is…Play the Recorder Month

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1939 [85] Neil Sedaka, Brooklyn NY, pop singer (‘Breaking Up is Hard to Do’, Calendar Girl’)/songwriter (‘Love Will Keep Us Together’, ‘Stupid Cupid’)

1950 [74] William H Macy, Miami FL, movie actor (“Fargo”, “Boogie Nights”)/TV actor (“Shameless” 2011-21)/married to Felicity Huffman since 1997. COMING UP… “Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes”, 2024

1956 [68] Dana Delaney, NYC, TV actress (“Hand of God” 2014-17, “Desperate Housewives” 2007-12,“Tulsa King” since 2022)/movie actress (“Tombstone”)/COMING UP… “The Union”

1960 [64] Adam Clayton, Chinnor England, rock bassist (U2-‘With or Without You’, ‘Beautiful Day’)

1972 [52] Common (Lonnie Lynn Jr), Chicago IL, rapper (an Oscar for the song ‘Glory’)/TV actor (“Hell on Wheels” 2011-14)/movie actor (“John Wick: Chapter 2”, “American Gangster”) COMING UP… “Breathe”

1973 [51] David Draiman, Brooklyn NY, rock singer (Disturbed-‘Down With the Sickness’, ‘The Sound of Silence’)

1976 [48] Danny Masterson, Albertson NY, TV actor (“The Ranch” 2016-2018, “That 70’s Show” 1998-2006)/(***currently serving 30 years to life in prison for 2 counts of forcible rape***)

1985 [39] Emile Hirsch, Topanga CA, movie actor (“Milk”, “Into the Wild”) COMING UP… “Prey”, 2024

1998 [26] Jack Harlow, Louisville KY, rapper, (‘Whats Poppin’, ‘First Class’)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2006 [18] Isaac Hayes (‘Chef’) quits the TV series “South Park” after an episode mocks his religion, Scientology

2022 [02] William Hurt, Oscar-winning star of “Kiss of the Spider Woman”, “The Big Chill” and “Broadcast News”, dies of prostate cancer at age 71

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1987 [37] Bryan Adams’ ‘Heat of the Night’ becomes the first-ever “cassette single” (Also the last?)

2006 [18] Black Sabbath, Blondie, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Miles Davis and The Sex Pistols are inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. The Pistols refuse to attend the ceremony and turn down enshrinement (…a totally punk-rock thing to do).

2007 [17] Amy Winehouse’s second album, “Back to Black”, is released (it goes on to win 5 Grammy Awards)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2013 [11] Pope Francis is elected in the papal conclave to succeed Pope Benedict XVI

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2012 [12] 25-year-old Dallas Seavey becomes the youngest-ever winner of the Iditarod sled dog race in Alaska (He also wins in 2014, 2015, 2016 and 2021)

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ Blowing out birthday candles on a cake increases bacteria by more than 1,400%.
✓ If a potato is exposed to light while growing, it will turn green and become poisonous.
✓ Temperature affects your attitude toward others. For example, if you hold a warm coffee as opposed to a cold drink, you are likely to be more selfless towards others.
✓ Astronauts don’t snore in space.
✓ Bill Gates’s house was designed using a Mac Computer.
✓ Martha Stewart’s prison nickname was “M. Diddy.”
-Buzzfeed, WhattheFFacts

Best of BS . . .
BS BEFORE AND AFTER MARRIAGE:
• BEFORE: You take my breath away / AFTER: I feel like I’m suffocating
• BEFORE: Victoria’s Secret / AFTER: Fruit-of-the-Loom
• BEFORE: She loves the way I take control of a situation / AFTER: She says I’m a controlling, manipulative egomaniac
• BEFORE: Saturday Night Fever / AFTER: Monday Night Football
• BEFORE: Don’t stop / AFTER: Don’t start
• BEFORE: Is that all you’re having? / AFTER: Maybe you should have just a salad, Honey
• BEFORE: $60/dozen / AFTER: $1.50/stem
• BEFORE: He’s completely lost without me / AFTER: Why won’t he ever ask for directions?
• BEFORE: Time stood still / AFTER: This relationship is going nowhere
• BEFORE: Oysters / AFTER: Fish sticks
• BEFORE: I can hardly believe we found each other / AFTER: I can’t believe I ended up with someone like you
• BEFORE: Passion / AFTER: Ration
• BEFORE: Once upon a time / AFTER  – The end
-Poddy’s, first published in BS in 2019

TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ Facebook estimates that 5% of its users are fake. (Sorry to have to tell you, but your parents’ accounts are real…!)
➠ Sunday, we lost an hour of our lives. (Five or six, if you sat through the Oscars!)
➠ The First Cannabis Church of Georgia is now open, and welcoming an inclusive community dedicated to the spiritual and healing properties of cannabis. (Apparently, the collection basket isn’t the only thing these guys will be passing around…)
➠ The Pentagon just released a new UFO report that claims there is no evidence that authorities covered up extraterrestrial life. (Which raises the question…if an Alien said: “Take Me to Your Leader”, would you choose Taylor Swift … or Oprah?)
➠ 50% of women say they would dump a guy if he hadn’t proposed after 5 years of dating. (So, if you’re on year 5, fellas, hold tight. You’re almost home free!)

BS WEB GOODIE: 
Truth?  https://tinyurl.com/mseyzm48

BS RANDOM JOKE:
If your parents didn’t use the word “galivanting”, did you REALLY run the streets, though?

BS WOULD YOU RATHER?
(***You run down the list while your caller decides which choice is more palatable …***)
• Would you rather live in a nice house in a boring town, or a rough house in an exciting town?
• Would you rather have everything in your house perfectly organized by a professional, or have a professional event company throw the best party you’ve ever been to, in your honor?
• Would you rather adopt a British accent every time you’re having a serious conversation, or laugh every time someone cries?
• Would you rather it be impossible for you to be awakened for 11 straight hours every day, but you wake up feeling amazing, wake up normally but never feel totally rested?
• Would you rather travel the world for a year all expenses paid, or have $40,000 to spend on whatever you want?
• Would you rather have to wear a bib every time you go out to eat, or drink from a sippy cup every time you’re at a bar?
• Would you rather be able to speed-read, or speak incredibly fast?
• Would you rather give up social media, or eat the same dinner for the rest of your life?
• Would you rather be the absolute best at something that no one takes seriously, or be slightly above average at something well-respected?
• Would you rather go on a double date with your parents, or your ex?
• Would you rather be in a real-life version of “The Walking Dead”, or “Jurassic Park”?

BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s your best “and then it got worse!” story?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Women were asked about the most immature thing guys do. Passing gas came first, burping came second. What was third?
Answer:  Always wanting to eat fast food

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
In a day where you don’t run into any problems — you can be sure that you are traveling in a wrong path.