Friday, May 27, 2005                 Edition: #3043
Don’t You Just Love the Smell of BS in the Morning?  

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
SATURDAY never-before-seen paintings by boxing legend Muhammad Ali will go on exhibit at NYC’s Chelsea Art Museum in a show called “Icons” . . . SATURDAY aging pop star Tom Jones returns to his hometown of Pontypridd, Wales for a one-off outdoor concert for 25,000 fans to mark his 65th birthday . . . SUNDAY CTV airs the made-for-TV movie “Plague City”, about the 2003 SARS crisis in Toronto (there’s something really tacky about the hard-sell promotion of this) . . . Tupac Shakur’s mother Afeni is opening the $4-million ‘Tupac Amaru Shakur Center for the Arts’ in Atlanta GA . . . London, England’s much-criticized, billion-dollar ‘white elephant’ may finally find a useful purpose – ‘The Millennium Dome’ will become a full-time concert venue when it’s reopened in 2007 as ‘The O2’ . . . Quentin Tarantino & Robert Rodriguez will each write and direct a 60-minute horror film, then the 2 movies will be packaged together under the title “Grind House” for the new Weinstein Company (the directors have shared work on each other’s projects before, including “Sin City” and “Kill Bill: Vol 2″) . . . Building buff Brad Pitt is reportedly teaming up with LA-based architect Frank Gehry to help design a $450-million residential & leisure complex in the English seaside town of Hove (Angelina Jolie lives not far off – coincidence?) . . . And “People” magazine is reporting these celebs are coupling up: movie actors Keanu Reeves & Lynn Collins, who’ll co-star in the upcoming film “Il Mare”; “The Ring” actress Naomi Watts & “Manchurian Candidate” actor Liev Schreiber; and Katherine Hiegl of TV’s “Grey’s Anatomy” with “Survivor: Palau” contestant Gregg Carey.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Barenaked Ladies – They’re helping to write the score for the Stratford ON Shakespearean Festival’s 2005 production of “As You Like It”.
• Justin Timberlake – “Us Weekly” reports that he’ll play the ‘bad-boy boyfriend’ of Sean Hayes’ character during a 3-episode guest run on “Will & Grace” THIS FALL.
• Keane – TONIGHT they’re on NBC-TV’s “Last Call With Carson Daly”.
• Nelly – TODAY he’s busy promoting his movie “The Longest Yard” on both the “Ellen DeGeneres Show” and “Jimmy Kimmel Live”.
• Rod Stewart – His 34-year-old fiancée Penny Lancaster is pregnant with their first child, setting the stage for the wrinkly rocker to become a father for the 7th time … at age 60.
•  Spice Girls – Word has it their threatened reunion is going to occur at the “Live 8″ concert set for JULY in London’s Hyde Park.
• Sum 41 – They’ll be subject of a ‘half reality/half mockumentary’ show for MTV2 called “Road To Ruin”. The project is being filmed during their current North American tour.
• System of a Down – Their 4th album, “Mezmerize”, has sold 800,000 copies worldwide in its debut week.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “The Longest Yard” (PG-13 Comedy): Adam Sandler leads a crew that includes Nelly, Chris Rock, former Dallas Cowboy Michael Irvin & wrassler Stone Cold Steve Austin in a remake of the 1974 Burt Reynolds comedy about a former NFL star who leads inmates in a gridiron battle against prison guards. Reynolds is back as the team’s coach (his spokesman says Burt was just ‘being playful’ when he slapped a TV producer’s face at the movie’s premiere earlier THIS WEEK). Filmed at New Mexico State Penitentiary.
• “Madagascar” (PG Family Animation): The “Shrek” and “Shark Tale” ‘toon team has lined up Ben Stiller (‘Alex the Lion’), David Schwimmer (‘Melman the Giraffe‘) & Chris Rock (‘Marty the Zebra’) to play animals who escape from a zoo only to find themselves stuck on an Africa-bound ship with a bunch of psycho penguins. Madonna, Jennifer Lopez & Gwen Stefani were all considered for the voice of ‘Gloria the Hippo’ before Jada Pinkett-Smith signed on.

WHERE TO GET BEST ‘SALARY VALUE’:
Here are the best and worst places to work based on the ‘Salary Value Index’, which takes into account several factors including average local paychecks, cost of living, and unemployment relative to the national average.
BEST CITIES TO WORK IN:
1. New London CT
2. Huntsville AL
3. Baltimore MD
4. Harrisburg PA
5. Tulsa OK
WORST CITIES TO WORK IN:
1. New York NY
2. San Francisco CA
3. Stamford CT
4. San Jose CA
5. San Diego CA
– Salary.com

HELL’S FURY:
According to the book “Women & Anger” by Sandra Thomas . . .
• Unmarried women suppress anger more than married women.
• The younger the woman, the more likely she is to express anger.
• Women get angry frequently but normally get over it in less than an hour.
• Most married women express anger to their husbands, even when angry with someone else. (No, really?)

NEW GIZMOS & GADGETS:
• The Stanislaus County Sheriff’s Department in California has a new hi-tech van that can detect vapors from methamphetamines while parked miles away. It’s the first non-military agency to get access to the technology. (“Modesto Bee”)
• Vancouver entrepreneur Brad Abram has developed the adult sex simulator “Virtually Jenna: The Official Video Game of Jenna Jameson”. Using the same technique that allows PC users to have star athletes play in sports video games, XStream3D Multimedia has created the ability to bring Jenna Jameson and other XXX stars to life on your PC. (Canada.com)

THE COOLEST CARS EVER ON TV:
5. “Magnum PI’s” Ferrari 308 GTS.
4. ‘The Batmobile’ on “Batman”.
3. ‘KITT’ from “Knight Rider”.
2. “Starsky & Hutch’s” Ford Gran Torino.
1. The ‘General Lee’ on “The Dukes of Hazzard”.
– AskMen.com

GRIN AND BARE IT:
The 11-year-old ‘Society for Barefoot Living’ has over 750 members worldwide. Members of this ‘dirty sole society’ are anti-shoe, believing it’s more natural to go barefoot. Here’s a few of their barefoot facts …
• It is healthy for your feet to go barefoot.
• It is not against the law to go barefoot into any kind of establishment INCLUDING restaurants.
• It is also not against any health department regulation.
• It is not against the law to drive barefoot.
NET: http://www.barefooters.org

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• The UN forecasts that within a few months more than half the world’s population will be living in cities. A century ago, only 14% of people lived in cities.
• New freckles generally stop appearing after age 19 or 20.
• For highway driving, it is more efficient to run your air conditioner than rolling down the windows. The aerodynamic drag caused by open windows takes more energy to overcome than operating your vehicle’s AC compressor.

THE BULL SHEET 05.27.2K5

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1936 [69] Louis Gossett Jr, Brooklyn NY, movie/TV actor (Academy Award-“An Officer & a Gentleman”/Emmy Award-“Roots”)

1945 [60] Bruce Cockburn, Pembroke ON, pop/folk singer (“Lovers in a Dangerous Time”, “Rumours of Glory”)

1955 [50] Richard Schiff, Bethesda MD, TV actor (‘Communications Director Toby Ziegler’ on “The West Wing” since 1999)

1957 [48] Eddie Harsch (Hawrysch), Toronto ON, rock musician (Black Crowes–“Hard to Handle”)  FACTOID: TONIGHT the Black Crowes play the Indianapolis Motor Speedway on “Indy 500″ weekend.

1971 [34] Paul Bettany, London UK, movie actor (“Master & Commander: The Far Side of the World”, “A Beautiful Mind”)/married to actress Jennifer Connelly since 2003

1975 [30] André 3000 (Benjamin), Atlanta GA, hip-hop artist (OutKast-“Hey Ya!”, “The Way You Move”)/movie actor (“Be Cool”, “Hollywood Homicide”)  UP NEXT: Stars in the drama “Four Brothers” (opening AUGUST 12th) and provides the voice of ‘Elwyn’ in “Charlotte’s Web” (JUNE 2006).

SATURDAY’S BIRTHDAYS . . .
Oldies singer Gladys Knight (“Midnight Train to Georgia”) is 61; Former NYC Mayor Rudolph Giuliani is 61; Classic rocker John Fogerty (CCR) is 60; Country singer Phil Vassar (“I’ll Take That as a Yes”) is 43; Pop singer Kylie Minogue (“Can’t Get You Out of My Head”) is 37.

SUNDAY’S BIRTHDAYS . . .
Movie actress Annette Bening (“Being Julia”) is 47; Movie actor Rupert Everett (“Shrek 2″) is 46; Classic rocker Melissa Etheridge (“I’m the Only One”) is 44; Rocker Noel Gallagher (Oasis) is 38; Faded pop star Melanie Brown (‘Scary Spice’ of the Spice Girls) is 30.

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
TODAY is “Ancestor Honor Day”, a day to reflect on the contributions of those who’ve gone before us.

SATURDAY is –
• “International Jazz Day”. The average jazz fan is a college-educated, 40-plus male. You know … your dad.
NET: http://www.geocities.com/BourbonStreet/4270/main.html
• “National Hamburger Day”, honoring the world’s favorite sandwich whose origins can be traced back as far as the Middle Ages. These days, close to 6 billion burgers are served annually by restaurants. Hamburger meat from a single steer will make about 720 quarter-pound hamburger patties.

SUNDAY is –
• “Indianapolis 500″, the 89th running of the ‘Greatest Spectacle in Racing’. NBA legend Reggie Miller will serve as the honorary starter; former US Secretary of State General Colin Powell will drive the pace car. This year’s race starts an hour earlier, at noon local time and features Danica Patrick, just the 4th woman to race in the “Indy 500″. Canadian drivers Patrick Carpentier and Marty Roth are also in the mix.
NET: http://www.indy500.com
• “Oak-Apple Day” or “Shick-Shack Day” in England, the anniversary of the restoration of Charles II to the British throne in 1660, traditionally marked by wearing an oak leaf or twig. The current Prince Charles has let it be known that, if and when he becomes king, he’d rather be called ‘King George VII’ rather than ‘Charles III’ because the previous Charlies were lousy leaders – Charles I was beheaded, and Charles II fathered a slew of illegitimate children.

MONDAY, the last Monday in May, is “Memorial Day” in America, a day of remembrance for those who have died in the nation’s service. It was originally called “Decoration Day” 137 years ago (1868) when General John Logan declared a day to decorate Civil War soldiers’ graves with flowers at Gettysburg PA. Nowadays its more often observed as ‘Beach Day’ or BBQ Day’.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1995 [10] “Superman” actor Christopher Reeve is thrown from a horse and sustains injuries that cause paralysis (dies of heart failure in 2004)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1919 [86] 1st ‘Pop-Up Toaster’ (and the 1st person to try and pry out a stuck piece of toast with a knife is electrocuted)

1930 [75] 1st ‘Masking Tape’ (and the 1st dweeb uses it to repair his eyeglasses)

1961 [44] 1st ‘Black Light’ is sold in a novelty shop (the kind that makes your white shirt glow)

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1884 [121] 22-inch-tall ‘General Mite’ marries 19.5-inch Millie Edwards (just lookin’ for a little nookie)

1994 [11] ‘Highest Temperature Ever Produced’ in a lab (920 million degrees F at Princeton University)

COMING UP . . .
[Mon] Memorial Day (USA)
[Mon] “Canadian Idol” season debut
[Tues] Macaroon Day
[Tues] Save Your Hearing Day
[Tues] World No-Tobacco Day
This Week Is . . . Backyard Games Week
This Month Is . . . Better Hearing & Speech Month

BULL’S BITS . . .
BS RULES FOR NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT & COMPLAIN ABOUT PETS:
• They live here. You don’t.
• If you don’t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture … that’s why it’s called FURniture.
• We like pets a lot better than most people.
• To you, it’s an animal. To us, it’s an adopted baby who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn’t speak clearly.
• Cats are better than kids. They eat less, don’t ask for money all the time, are easier to train, usually come when called, never drive your car, don’t smoke, do drugs or drink, don’t worry about buying the latest fashions, don’t wear your clothes, don’t need a gazillion dollars for college, and won’t get pregnant because they’ve been ‘fixed’.

TOP SWAPS:
The week’s most requested music files online …
1. Akon – “Lonely”
2. 50 Cent – “Just A Lil Bit”
3. Ciara – “Oh”
4. Destiny’s Child – “Girl”
5. Green Day – “Holiday”
– Big Champagne online music measurement.

BS BLATANT JOKES:
• As I said before, I never repeat myself …
• Forget the Joneses, I keep up with “The Simpsons”.

BS PHONE STARTERS:
• Dayton OH has begun a new program that pressures property owners into cleaning up their act by posting large signs on rundown houses identifying the owners and how to contact them. Is ‘shaming’ a good idea or an invasion of privacy?
• What is the creepiest creature? (In a Zogby poll 34% say snakes, 20% pick spiders, and 17% rats [just ahead of Michael Jackson].)

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: 1 in 3 single guys is looking for a woman with THIS quality.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: More money than they have.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.