The Bull Sheet

May 5 2021

Wednesday, May 5, 2021 — Edition: #6980

Bullseye!


BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:

★ Conan O’Brien has announced that after 11 years, he will be “winding down” his TBS late night show, with the final episode airing June 24. O’Brien said he is leaving to launch a “fourth iteration” of his program with HBO Max later this year, and that his final two months on TBS will be dedicated to clips of his favorite moments, and will feature special guests.
-NYTimes
★ The title for “Black Panther 2” has been revealed by Marvel Studios. The sequel to the 2018 film starring the late Chadwick Boseman, which is set to be released July 8, 2022, will be called: “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever.” As Marvel has previously stated, they will not recast the character of ‘T’Challa’, in order to honor Boseman’s legacy and performance following his passing last August. The sequel “will explore the world of Wakanda and the rich characters introduced in the first film.”
-TheWrap
★ Leonardo DiCaprio will star in an English language remake of “Another Round”. The movie follows the story of four teachers, who work at a school in Copenhagen and are looking for some excitement in their lives. At one fateful dinner, they decide to see if things are better after a few drinks and make a plan to keep their blood alcohol levels raised at all times to see if it does the trick. But one of the teachers takes things a bit too far, and their friends start to fear they are becoming alcoholics. Mads Mikkelsen starred in the 2020 Danish version of the film.
-ContactMusic
★ Kim Kardashian West is about to earn some major brownie points with her four kids. She has landed a voiceover role in the upcoming “PAW Patrol: The Movie,” and on Monday, the first image of her character ‘Delores’ was released. Delores is a white poodle and a newcomer to the “PAW Patrol” world. Paw Patrol: The Movie is set to be released Aug. 20.
-ETCanada

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Rob McElhenney, Uzo Aduba, Middle Kids
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Channing Tatum, Josh Duhamel, Joyelle Nicole Johnson
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Joe Scarborough, Mika Brzezinski, Bebe Rexha (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Sen. Amy Klobuchar, Robin Thede, Ryan Hurd with Maren Morris, Mario Duplantier
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Billy Porter, Brett Gelman
• “Conan” (TBS): Flula Borg
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): The Real Househusbands of New Jersey
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Billy Crystal, Tiffany Haddish
• “The Talk” (CBS): Brian Tyree Henry, guest co-hosts Jerry O’Connell & Justin Baldoni
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): David Oyelowo
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Michael Che, Thomas Rhett
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Sara Bareilles, Renée Elise Goldsberry, Busy Philipps, Paula Pell, Ariana Madix, Tom Sandoval
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Laura Prepon, Abbi Jacobson
• “Kids Say the Darndest Things” (CBS): Season 2 premiere
• “Human: The World Within” (PBS): A look at how bodies create and sustain new life, through the eyes of parents preparing for a birth; what is fundamental and unique about the birth experience.
• “Crank Yankers” (COMEDY): Season 6 premiere. Celebrities perform as puppet citizens of Yankerville and make prank phone calls on real, unsuspecting people.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Billie Eilish – says she found screaming on a song for her upcoming album to be “very satisfying.” She told Vogue that she channeled a lot of “anger and “frustration” into the songs on “Happier Than Ever”, out July 30. The 19-year-old calls the album her “favorite thing” she’s “ever created”.
• The Weeknd — Despite an overhaul to the rules of the Grammys, he will continue to boycott the awards show, and won’t submit songs to the Recording Academy. He was snubbed from the nominations this year, despite his mega-hit ‘Blinding Lights’ and album “After Hours.”
• Coldplay – Frontman Chris Martin will mentor the “American Idol” top 7 on Sunday in an episode centered on his band’s music. The show will also feature the first live performance of Coldplay’s new single, ‘Higher Power’, which is due out on Friday.
• The Bangles – In a new interview, Susanna Hoffs says she recorded the vocals for their hit ‘Eternal Flame’ in the nude. She claims that the group’s producer pulled the prank of telling her that Olivia Newton John did her best vocals naked, so she “decided to try it”. After the first song went well, she says she recorded most of the album that way.
• Everclear — has announced the July return of its “Summerland” tour, also featuring Living Colour, Hoobastank and Wheatus. The US tour will eventually extend through early October as COVID-19 mandates are lifted and more dates are added.
• The Flaming Lips — are set for a nearly year-long world tour starting this summer, and will reissue “The Soft Bulletin Companion” on June 12 as part of Record Store Day. It was originally released over 20 years ago as a companion CD alongside “The Soft Bulletin”. It contains unreleased material, outtakes, early mixes, B-sides, bonus tracks, and stereo versions of songs from their prior album “Zaireeka”.
• Luke Bryan – will make a guest appearance on Jordan Davis’ upcoming EP. “Buy Dirt” drops on May 21, and Bryan joins Davis on the title track, which has already been released. LINK: https://youtu.be/ub9noh7kC4A
• Midland — are the latest country act to resume their tour plans following pandemic shutdowns. The trio are hitting the road for their 2021 “The Last Resort Tour” this fall. Beginning on Oct. 7 in Phoenix AZ, and wrapping on Dec. 16 in Shreveport LA, the 26-stop run will extend throughout the U.S.
• Lucinda Williams – For the past 6 months, 68-year-old has been recovering from a stroke. She told Rolling Stone that she is expected to make a 100% recovery, as doctors have found no signs of brain damage. The stroke has impacted her ability to play guitar, which she is taking therapy for.

SHOOTING THE BULL

DOUBLE SHOT:
Are you among the millions of people who are waiting to receive a second dose of the Pfizer-BioNTech or Moderna COVID-19 vaccine? When your appointment day comes, make sure you don’t miss it. Researchers from Cornell University say lack of information about the importance of a second shot could end up prolonging the coronavirus pandemic. They found that 1 in 5 people surveyed in the US believe the vaccines will actually provide enough protection against COVID after just one dose. Researchers found the problem isn’t just with the public. They say not enough people are getting proper guidance from officials or facilities handling vaccinations. Among vaccinated respondents, only half said they received information about the timing of vaccine protection. Nearly 8% of Americans are not following through on both COVID doses. That’s over 5 million people missing their second appointment. That means new CDC recommendations putting an end to mask-wearing in most situations do not apply to those patients.
(OK, fine then…I’ll make another appointment to pass out in front of a nurse!)
(Maybe one of the side-effects is forgetfulness?)
(That would mean they had their first vaccination “in vein”!)
-StudyFinds

A GOOD SENSE OF RUMOR:
Just in case Maddie in accounting hasn’t already told you, scientists have found that gossip can actually be good for you. Despite its negative reputation, researchers at Dartmouth College say that the act of spreading information in places like an office setting isn’t just about passing on rumors and saying bad things about others. Their report found that it also serves to create social connections and helps people learn new things about the world they haven’t experienced for themselves. While many of us associate gossip with trading negative secrets, the scientists say it can also include small talk in-person or online, like having a private Zoom chat. Previous studies have found that about 14% of people’s daily conversations can be classified as gossip — and most of it is neutral in tone. Study authors found that gossip can create a “shared reality” where friends and colleagues build social bonds, exchange information, and reach agreements on socially acceptable behavior.
(And apparently, around here, that “socially acceptable behavior” involves laughing at my wardrobe every time I leave the room!)
(Well, that’s ONE thing that we aren’t guilty of around here!)
(I really dislike gossipers. They “discuss” me!)
-StudyFinds

BETCHA CAN EAT JUST ONE:
An Australian man has become the first ever to complete a pub’s 5kg burger challenge. On the weekend, “James” became the first to earn a place on the “Legends Board” at the Kitchener Hotel in Cessnock. After 55 others before him failed, James devoured the $60 burger weighing 5kgs (11lbs) in under 30 minutes. He managed the feat, which many have called “impossible”, in 25 minutes and 37 seconds. And what did he earn for his gluttony? Aside from a full stomach and probably some serious heartburn? The prize money for the eventual winner has slowly increased every time someone failed to put the whole meal away, so James walked away with a hefty $650, and the prize has now been reset to $100 for the next challenger. And just to make his feat even more ridiculous, James still had room for dessert. He ordered a double serving of cheesecake to wash down his main meal. PICS: https://tinyurl.com/px5w7xm5
(And there you have it: The ULTIMATE cheat meal!)
(You have to admit…he was on a roll…)
-BroBible, HoneyNine

FROM THE BS POLL VAULT:
A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 52% of teens say they get along better with their Mom than their Dad (only 24% said ‘Dad’.)
• 60% of moms say the best way to discipline their kids is to take away their video games.
• 18% of us say we have quit a job because our Mother told us to.
• 21% of Moms say if they were given an extra hour everyday, they would spend it reading.
• 14% of women have broken up with a man because they didn’t like his Mother.
• 12% of Mothers admit that what they want most for Mother’s Day is the day to themselves.

BANDS THAT DON’T HAVE A “THE” IN THEIR NAME:
(***NOTE: This could also be presented as a trivia game…***)
⇒ Eagles
⇒ Scorpions
⇒ Ramones
⇒ Red Hot Chili Peppers
⇒ Beastie Boys
⇒ Bee Gees
⇒ Carpenters
⇒ Talking Heads
⇒ Pretenders
⇒ Foo Fighters
⇒ Grateful Dead
-Loudwire

DID YOU KNOW?
A longevity expert says we should all get in the habit of sitting on the floor. Dan Buettner says that the people of Okinawa, Japan, keep furniture to a minimum in their homes, so they naturally do most of their sitting on the floor. And, he says, the benefits are evident. Quote: “The longest-lived women in the history of the world lived in Okinawa, and…they sat on the floor. I spent two days with a 103-year-old woman and saw her get up and down from the floor 30 or 40 times, so that’s like 30 or 40 squats done daily.” Researchers say your ability to stand up from a seated, cross-legged position without using any of your limbs (known as the sitting-rising test) is a good marker of longevity.
-WellandGood

BS CHRONOMETER 05.05.21

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1959 [62] Brian Williams, Elmira NY, broadcast journalist (MSNBC chief anchor since 2015, “The 11th Hour with Brian Williams” since 2016/“NBC Nightly News” 2004-15)

1981 [40] Craig David, Southampton UK, singer-rapper (‘Fill Me In’, ft. Bastille: ‘I Know You’)

1983 [38] Henry Cavill, Saint Saviour Jersey Channel Islands, movie actor (“Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice”, “Man of Steel”)

1988 [33] Adele (Adkins), Enfield UK, pop/soul singer-songwriter (‘Hello’, ‘Rolling In the Deep’)

1988 [33] Brooke Hogan (Bollea), Tampa FL, pop singer-actress-reality star (“Hogan Knows Best” 2005-07/“Brooke Knows Best” 2008-09)/daughter of wrestler Hulk Hogan

1989 [32] Chris Brown, Tappahannock VA, R&B/hip-hop singer (‘Forever’, ft. Drake: ‘No Guidance’)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Cinco de Mayo”, a Mexican holiday commemorating the 1862 victory over French troops at the Battle of Puebla. Mexicans (and honorary Mexicans) everywhere celebrate with parades and fiestas. (The only downside to Cinco de Mayo is “Seis de Hangover”!) Today is also called . . .

• “Totally Chipotle Day”, a celebration of the smoked jalapeño pepper.

• “Cartoonists Day”, kicking off “Cartoon Art Appreciation Week”, to create greater public awareness of and appreciation for the cartoon. Why today? “The Yellow Kid”, the first newspaper comic strip, was initially published on this day 126 years ago (1895).  What’s your favorite?  Least favorite?

• “Hoagie Day”, celebrating the super-sized sandwich also known as a sub, grinder, hero, Italian sandwich, po’ boy, wedge, zeppelin, or torpedo. What’s the best combo?

• “International Midwives Day”, observed since 1991 in over 50 nations to recognize and honor these healthcare professionals who are experts in women’s reproductive health.

• “International Roller Derby Day”, an unofficial worldwide holiday celebrating the unique sport. (***Find your roller derby name here…***) LINK: https://tinyurl.com/5m8zrxb5

• “Oyster Day”, celebrating the mollusk delicacy enjoyed by many. (What brave soul could have first decided to eat one of these things?)

• “Great American Grump Out”, the annual observance when we’re all asked to go 24 hours without being grumpy, crabby, or rude. So, suck it up, sourpusses!

COMING UP . . .
[Thurs] Beverage Day
[Thurs] National Nurses Day
[Fri] Cosmopolitan Day
[Fri] Tourism Day

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2000 [21] Angelina Jolie marries Billy Bob Thornton at The Little Church of The West Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas, Nevada. They would divorce in 2003

2002 [19] “Spider-Man” becomes the first movie to top $100 million in its opening weekend

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1999 [22] Garth Brooks is named ‘Artist of the Decade’ at the “Academy of Country Music Awards”

2014 [07] Beyoncé’s sister Solange attacks Jay-Z in an elevator after attending the Met Gala in New York. The leaked footage shows Jay taking his whooping before a security guard restrains Solange. Beyoncé later mentions the incident in her song ‘Flawless’

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1904 [117] Cy Young pitches the first perfect game in “modern” baseball as the Boston Americans beat the Philadelphia Athletics, 3-0

2013 [08] The world’s first plastic gun is produced by Defense Distributed in Austin TX using a 3-D printer (security officials fear plastic weapons cannot be detected in airport screenings)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2004 [17] Picasso’s 1905 painting “Boy With a Pipe” sells for $104 million at Sotheby’s in NYC, setting a record-to-date for an auctioned painting

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ The first ever oranges were green.
✓ Corn doesn’t exist in the wild. If humans stopped cultivating it, corn would die out in a few years.
✓ Goats have accents.
✓ People who are lying tend to look up and to their left.
✓ Radio waves travel at the speed of light.
✓ Major league baseball umpires are required to wear black underwear in case their pants split.
-KickassFacts, WomansDay

Best of BS . . .
In honor of Mom’s Day this Sunday, we present . . .
BS WHEN MOM IS MAD . . .
• Never let her brush your hair.
• She stops speaking English and starts swearing in her mother tongue.
• Quickly hide all the slippers in the house.
• …is the only time I ever hear my middle name.
• Pack your bags because you’re about to go on a guilt trip.
• Do not, under any circumstances, ask her if it’s “that time of month”.
• She yells so loud that the neighbors brush THEIR teeth and go to bed.
• I have to come up from the basement and get my own snacks.
• Tell her how pretty she is and hand her a glass of wine.
• Dad is scared.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019

TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ It may be Cinco De Mayo, but I don’t celebrate, because it promotes stereotypes. (Plus I can’t be trusted with alcohol since I’m Irish!)
➠ Bill Gates and wife Melinda have filed for divorce. (She wants the house, but for obvious reasons “…he can keep the damn Windows!”)
➠ It’s Mother’s Day this Sunday, and it’s National Masturbation month. (This just shows you where our priorities lie. Mom barely gets 24 hours . . . Masturbation gets 31 whole days!)
➠ Yesterday was National Teacher Appreciation Day. Meanwhile . . . it’s National Teacher Appreciation Week until May 8th. (Just thinking about teaching exhausts me. Actually, just thinking exhausts me. I’m not smart.)
➠ Rapper Travis Scott’s “Space Rage” perfume is 2021’s most sold men’s cologne. (So great news for anyone eager to smell like jasmine, lilac and Hepatitis.)

TRUTH OR BS?
Some of these statements are true, some total BS. Which are which?
• There is one part of the body that can’t heal itself. [TRUE. The teeth]
• Idina Menzel sings ‘Let it Go’ 20 times in “Frozen”. [BS. She sings it 21 times]
• The unicorn is the national animal of Scotland. [TRUE.]
• ‘A’ is the most commonly-used letter in the English language. [FALSE. ‘E’ is the most common, appearing in 11% of all words.]
• Coffee is made from berries. [TRUE. When coffee berries turn from green to red, they are picked, processed, and dried, before being roasted and turned into coffee.]
• ‘Spaghetto’ is the singular word for a piece of spaghetti. [TRUE. Generally, Italian words ending in “o” are singular and words ending in “i” are plural.]
• Venus is the hottest planet in the solar system. [TRUE. It has an average surface temperature of around 450° C (842°F). Mercury is closer to the sun, but with no atmosphere, it has very large temperature fluctuations.]
• Cardi B’s real name is Cardigan Backyardigan. [FALSE. – that was a meme. Her name is Belcalis Marlenis Almánzar.]
-Cosmopolitan

BS WEB GOODIE:
Strangely satisfying:  https://tinyurl.com/w2mufp

BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s the creepiest urban legend you’ve ever heard?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
It’s funny how Cinco de Mayo always seems to fall on May 5.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  32% of people admit they’ve lied to get out of THIS. What is it?
Answer:  A wedding

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

 

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