Friday, May 1, 2020 Edition: #6688
Thanks a Sheetload for Choosing “BS”!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ The 2020 Daytime Emmys, Sports Emmys, News & Documentary Emmys and Technology & Engineering Emmys will be replaced by virtual ceremonies, the National Academy of Television Arts & Sciences has announced. NATAS said the virtual ceremonies will be remote video productions “leveraging multiple remote video technologies to involve nominees and presenters.” They will be available on all leading “Smart TV” platforms and other distribution partners. Dates and times for the new productions have yet to be determined.
-TheWrap
★ Harrison Ford says an airport runway incident now under investigation by the Federal Aviation Administration came about because he “misheard a radio instruction.” The 77-year-old, who is an avid pilot, was operating a plane at California’s Hawthorne Airport on April 24 when he crossed a runway while another aircraft was landing. His rep added that no one was injured in the incident and “there was never any danger of a collision.” The FAA has confirmed that the two aircrafts were approximately 3,600 feet away from each other at the time. (This guy just shouldn’t be flying ‘Han Solo…’)
-PageSix
★ Now we know how some very physically fit people will be celebrating the end of the coronavirus quarantine: TBS has ordered a 20-episode revival of the game show “Wipeout”. The original series, which aired on ABC from 2008-2014, featured contestants competing against each other in what was billed as the ‘world’s largest obstacle course’. The show celebrated athletic achievement, but also reveled in the comedic possibilities of failure as contestants navigated events like “Sucker Punch,” the “Sweeper,” the “Dreadmill” or the show’s most well-known obstacle, “Big Balls.”
-TheWrap
★ Joseph Gordon-Levitt has shared a message of support to the graduating classes of 2020. He’s urged young people who have had their final school years end early because of the coronavirus pandemic to ”rise to the occasion” and hailed them as the start of a ”new generation” who will be asked to ”rebuild the world” in the years to come. Gordon-Levitt has also started an initiative urging the class of 2020 to write their own reflections, and for others to send messages of support to them.
-ContactMusic
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Jon Hamm, Brené Brown, Hailee Steinfeld
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Thandie Newton, Ina Garten, John Mulaney
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Rachel Maddow, JB Smoove, Jean-George Vongerichten, Caitlin Kalafus (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Liv Tyler, Norman Reedus, Blackbear (R)
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Reza & Adam Farahan, Mercedes Javid, Tommy Feight
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Billy Porter, Paula Faris
• “The Talk” (CBS): Donnie Wahlberg, Mary Steenburgen
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Repeat segments with Michael Bublé, Bethenny Frankel, Jewel
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Julia Louis-Dreyfus
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): A new Message From Montana, repeat segments with Whitney Cummings, Alexander Ludwig, Wolfgang Puck (R)
• “Betty” (HBO): Series premiere. When Janay and Kirt attempt to throw an all-girls skate session, an unexpected visitor cuts the festivities short, chaos ensues and there’s also a van.
• “Charmed” (CW) Season 2 finale
SATURDAY-
• “Deadly Mile High Club” (LIFETIME): Obsessed with a handsome student, a deranged flight instructor tries to destroy the people in his life and make him fall in love with her.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC): Hosted by Daniel Craig, with musical guest The Weeknd (R)
SUNDAY-
• “American Idol” (ABC): On With the Show: Homeward Bound
• “Good Witch” (HALLMARK): As Cassie and Sam prepare to celebrate their first wedding anniversary, Cassie welcomes Grey House guest Joy, who seems to be spying on the Merriwicks.
• “Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist” (NBC): Season 1 finale
• “Good Girls” (NBC): Season 3 finale
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Post Malone — is asking fans to help him donate up to $1 million to a charity of their choosing through the celebrity fan platform “Community”. In a release, he said: “Not everyone has the ability to financially support causes that may be close to them or that have helped them in the past…I want to give them the chance to give to charities that mean something to them.”
• Katy Perry — called into “The View” on Wednesday to give an update on being pregnant and quarantined. Quote: “I have nothing to compare it to because it’s my first, so obviously I’m just taking it one day at a time. I’m saying my prayers, I’m chanting, I’m looking for gratitude in every corner of my life.”
• Lizzo – turned 32 on Monday. Later, she posted a joyous, tearful selfie video where she said: “Beyoncé wished me a happy birthday on her website. She knows it’s my birthday. Thank you, Beyoncé. Oh my God, thank you, Beyoncé. She knows I exist. I don’t know what to do with myself.”
• Eminem — is parting ways with an extremely rare and expensive pair of his Jordan 4s for COVID-19 relief. On Wednesday, he announced he had an extra pair of his highly coveted Jordan 4 Retro “Carhartt x Eminem” kicks lying around, and he has teamed up with shoe auction site StockX to raise money for the good cause.
• Amy Winehouse — The Grammy Museum in Los Angeles hosted an Instagram Live event focused on her yesterday, the 13th anniversary of the release of her single ‘Back to Black’. A virtual exhibit is available on the Museum’s website beginning today which includes never-before-seen handwritten lyrics and journal entries.
• Mötley Crüe – Drummer Tommy Lee says he is no longer answering fan mail after some of the autographed items he sent to fans ended up on eBay. He took to his social media to share several examples of signed photographs and drumheads he found on the auction site.
• U2 and Elton John – have recorded a cover of ‘Bang a Gong (Get It On)’ for “AngelHeaded Hipster: The Songs of Marc Bolan and T. Rex”, a tribute album arriving on Sept. 4. The two-disc collection will also include Joan Jett, Todd Rundgren, Nick Cave and Perry Farrell. The project was curated by producer Hal Willner, who died in April from COVID-19.
• Tenille Townes — her debut album “The Lemonade Stand” will arrive on June 26th. It will contain 12 tunes, all of which she co-wrote. Five were previously released in February, on her “Road to the Lemonade Stand” EP, including ‘Somebody’s Daughter’.
• Blake Shelton – he and Gwen Stefani couldn’t contain their glee after their duet, ‘Nobody but You’ hit #1 on the Billboard Country Airplay chart. Stefani posted: “Thank you! For taking me along on this ride with you!! I am so grateful and blown away by all the support everyone has shown us!!?!!” That came after Shelton congratulated her for her first country #1: “Not bad for your first try!!!!!”
HOME-WORK PERKS:
While thousands (or millions?) of adults around the world have been forced to work from home amidst the pandemic, how many of us would prefer to continue doing so once this thing ends? A global poll of 2,2350 office workers found that 48% of us would actually take a pay cut in order to avoid that commute on a permanent basis. 77% of respondents said that they believe working from home is one of the most effective ways to help the environment. Other benefits of working from home? 72% said they save time, 66% said they save money, 45% feel happier, and 37% feel as though they are more productive. The average office worker in the survey said they normally spend almost an hour per day commuting to and from work – five hours per week they could get back by working from home.
Other perks of working from home mentioned:
• Flexible schedule: 52%
• Access to own kitchen: 47%
• Wearing whatever they want: 45%
(Being close to their kids? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?)
(45% feel happier? Imagine how happy they’d be if they were working from home – and there WASN’T a global health crisis!)
(Of course they are saving money – they’re not being asked to fork out for a co-worker’s birthday present twice a week!)
-GoodNewsNetwork
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ The ongoing debate is whether or not we should be wearing masks to protect ourselves. Last week, New Jersey motorist experienced first hand what can happen if these masks are not used properly. The driver, who has not been named, crashed their car into a pole after passing out while wearing an N95 mask. Police say the crash is believed to have resulted from wearing a mask for several hours and subsequently passing out behind the wheel due to insufficient oxygen intake and excessive carbon dioxide intake. No serious injuries were reported. (Even an N95 couldn’t mask his embarrassment…)
➢ A British cleaner made a big mess of a library when he went above and beyond the call of duty and reorganized all of its books — by size. Newmarket Library employees returned the following day to discover the shelves lined with books arranged from largest to smallest — and their alphabetical organizing system totally upended. A spokesman says that with libraries closed these days anyway, they will “have plenty of time to sort the books out.” (Somewhere, the Dewey Decimal guy is rolling in his grave!)
-TwentyTwoWords, NYPost
HOMEWORK HELP:
(The best tweets of the week from parents struggling to help with their kids’ homework…)
☞ My 16yo son just asked me to help him with his AP Chemistry homework and then we both laughed and laughed and he went on his way. — @Cheeseboy22
☞ One day someone will ask my kids if they ever saw their dad cry and they will think about the time with the math homework. — @simoncholland
☞ 10YR OLD: dad, can you help me with my math homework?
ME: *throws smoke bomb* — @AndyasAdjective
☞ My Son Is Stupid He Got Zero Even When I Did His Homework — @CorrosiveRules
☞ I love doing homework with my son, helping him learn new things and by default, helping his teacher learn new things. Today, for example, she’s going to learn that the two types of camels are animals and cigarettes. — @sofarrsogud
BAT MYTHS BUSTED:
✗ They drink human blood: Only a few species such as vampire bats feed on blood…usually that of cattle. (And what if there don’t happen to be any cattle handy?)
✗ Bats are blind: While their eyes are small and poorly developed, they work just fine. (They always seem to find their way into my attic…)
✗ They aren’t that important: Like bees, bats are pollinators. They disperse seeds that grow into bananas, avocados, and nearly 300 other plant species. (I understand they eat a few mosquitos too…)
✗ Bats can get tangled in hair: While it may appear that they are swooping down at you and want to nest in your hair, they don’t. This was an old myth that was used to deter young girls from going out at night.
✗ All bats have rabies: Only 5-6% of bats captured in the U.S. for testing were found to have rabies. (Tell that to Ozzy Osbourne!)
(The bat that got loose in our kitchen last week also busted the myth at our place that “Daddy never screams!”)
-Naturee
DID YOU KNOW?
The US marriage rate fell to its lowest level on record in 2018. New figures from the National Center for Health Statistics reveal the nationwide marriage rate fell 6 percent from 2017 to 2018, with just 6.5 new unions formed for every 1,000 people. That’s the lowest rate since the US government started tracking such data in 1867. (2020 to 2019: “Hold my beer!”)
-USAToday
BS CHRONOMETER 05.01.20
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1967 [53] Tim McGraw, Delhi LA, country singer (‘Humble and Kind’, ‘Live Like You Were Dying’)/movie actor (“The Blind Side”, “Friday Night Lights”)/Mr. Faith Hill since 1996
1969 [51] Wes Anderson, Houston TX, movie director (“The Grand Budapest Hotel”, “The Royal Tenenbaums”)
1972 [48] Julie Benz, Pittsburgh PA, TV actress (“Defiance” 2013-15, “Dexter” 2006-10)
1982 [38] Jamie Dornan, Holywood Northern Ireland, movie actor (“Fifty Shades of Grey” trilogy)/TV actor (“Once Upon a Time” 2011-13)
SATURDAY- Christine Baranski (“The Good Wife”) is 68; Fashion Designer Donatella Versace is 65; Dwayne Johnson (“Fast & Furious” films) is 48; Retired soccer player David Beckham is 45; Ellie Kemper (“Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt”) is 40; Lily Allen (‘Somewhere Only We Know’) is 35; NASCAR driver Kyle Busch is 35; Princess Charlotte is 5
SUNDAY- Frankie Valli (‘Big Girls Don’t Cry’) is 86; TV sportscaster Greg Gumbel is 74; Amy Ryan (“The Office”) is 52; John Driskell Hopkins (Zac Brown Band) is 49; Christina Hendricks (“Good Girls”) is 45; Eric Church (‘Record Year’) is 43; Cheryl Burke (“Dancing With the Stars”) is 36
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “May Day”, a traditional holiday celebration since ancient times. Since 1889, it’s been officially observed in 66 countries as a “Labor Day” holiday.
• “Lei Day”, celebrated in Hawaii instead of May Day. It is a time to celebrate native Hawaiian culture. One of the most common flowers used in leis is the orchid.
• “Couple Appreciation Day”, for those who are in a relationship do something to show their appreciation for their partner (or partners!).
• “Mother Goose Day”, which actually honors many different writers. The term was first used in the title of the nursery rhyme collection “Mother Goose’s Melody” in about 1765. The name caught on and nursery rhymes have been attributed to ‘Mother Goose’ ever since.
• “School Principals Day”. It’s a dirty job but some sadist has gotta do it! How do you remember how to spell ‘Principal’? Just remember that he/she is always your ‘pal’!
• “Chocolate Parfait Day”. Parfait literally means “perfect” in French! The American style layers parfait cream, ice cream and flavored gelatin in a tall, clear glass topped with whipped cream, fruit and liqueurs.
• “Law Day”. This day allows all Americans to reflect on the personal rights and liberties which are enjoyed and exercised daily.
• “New Homeowner’s Day”. Congratulations, you’ll be debt-free in about 30 years! Got your repair manual yet?
SATURDAY-
• “Brothers and Sisters Day!”, a day to let siblings know you care. (Or maybe to add up all the times you got ratted on, had your hair pulled or your dessert stolen … and get even!)
• “Play Your Ukulele Day”, when you’re encouraged to play a ukulele, share your ukulele, and teach someone else how to play. (What’s the difference between a ukulele and a trampoline? You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.)
• “Life Insurance Day” The anniversary of the day life insurance became available in the United States in 1759. (They say that life insurance is like fun: The older you get, the more it costs…)
• “Truffle Day” Celebrating the chocolate confectionery traditionally made with a chocolate ganache center coated in chocolate, icing, cocoa powder, chopped nuts or coconut.
SUNDAY-
• “Wordsmith Day, just one more excuse for miscellaneous merriment. How scintillating yet somehow egregious.
• “Two Different Colored Shoes Day” celebrate your uniqueness and put it on display today. Wear two different colored shoes and see where they take you.
• “Paranormal Day”, a day for all paranormal enthusiasts to get together (online) and share their unique experiences with each other. (Personally, I would have this on Oct. 31. Maybe a pair o’paranormal days?)
• “Specially-Abled Pets Day”, begun in 2006 to educate the public about caring for disabled pets and to find homes for orphaned and physically-challenged animals.
• “World Press Freedom Day”, created by the UN to recognize the value of freedom of expression and the sacrifices journalists have made to attain this freedom.
• “Garden Meditation Day”, a day to let go of concerns and center your full attention on a garden, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Meditate about when you’re going to get around to weeding.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1967 [53] The “King of Rock and Roll” Elvis Presley weds actress Priscilla Beaulieu at Aladdin Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada
2019 [01] Joe Jonas of Jonas Brothers marries “Game of Thrones” star Sophie Turner in Las Vegas, where an Elvis impersonator officiates
2019 [01] New York City officially names a street “Sesame Street” at the intersection of West 63rd Street and Broadway in honor of the show’s 50th anniversary
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2000 [20] Destiny’s Child release their third album, “Survivor”, which is all about sisterhood and empowerment. It’s their first release with the lineup of Beyoncé, Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams.
2017 [03] Smashing Pumpkins’ Billy Corgan agrees to purchase the National Wrestling Alliance (NWA)
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1939 [81] Batman, the creation of Bob Kane and Bill Finger, first appears in Detective Comics #27. He would star in his own comic book beginning in 1940
2011 [09] Barack Obama announces the death of elusive Al-Qaeda terrorist leader Osama bin Laden after a secret mission carried out by US Navy SEALs
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2005 [15] Fishermen in northern Thailand catch a 293-kilo (646-lb), 2.7-m (8.9-ft) Mekong giant catfish, the ‘Largest Freshwater Fish’ ever recorded
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ A person burns essentially the same number of calories whether they run or walk a mile.
✓ Most toilet paper sold for home use in France is pink.
✓ It takes seven standard shuffles to thoroughly mix a 52-card deck.
✓ A can of cat food contains as much meat as five adult mice.
✓ Tweety Pie won an Oscar in 1948.
✓ Raccoons, slugs and ants all like to get drunk.
-FactRetriever, BathroomReadersInstitute
Best of BS . . .
BS WHEN MARVEL RUNS OUT OF MOVIE IDEAS:
• Dances With Wolverines
• Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Deadpool
• A Stark is Born
• Jurassic Parker
• Loki Who’s Talking
• Groot Expectations
• Romancing the Infinity Stone
• Fantastic Four Weddings and a Funeral
• The Daredevil Wears Prada
• Stan By Lee
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ Monday is “Star Wars” Day (May the Fourth Be With You). (Unless you have a girlfriend. Then it’s just Monday…)
➠ A huge sinkhole has made Ecuador’s tallest waterfall disappear. (Man, this couldn’t have waited a few days? I mean Sinkhole De mayo?)
➠ The YesStyle Blog recently named Miami one of the most Beauty-Obsessed Cities in the World. (This just in: E! has announced a new series: “Kourtney and Kim Take Miami”. . . What’s that? . . . this has already happened??)
➠ May is National Burger Month. (David Hasselhoff will celebrate by eating one at his favorite place: The Floor)
➠ Fact of the Day: It’s illegal to get a fish drunk in Ohio. (Anyone trying to get a fish ‘drunk’ is only doing it …for Shellfish reasons!)
BS WEB GOODIE:
Teacher’s song about feelings leaves TV hosts feeling giggly: https://tinyurl.com/y8f6twbr
BS PHONE STARTER:
What is the weirdest thing that you’ve ever witnessed?
BS RANDOM JOKE:
My professor accused me of plagiarizing. His words, not mine.
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 55% of us admit THIS is one of the first things they notice about other people. What is it?
Answer: Their choice of smartphone
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
When you want to help people, you tell them the truth. When you want to help yourself, you tell them what they want to hear.