The Bull Sheet

May 14 2018

Monday, May 14, 2018 Edition: #6212

It’s Your Daily Constitutional Sheet!

BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
There’ll be no “BS” service for Monday May 21 to observe the Canadian Victoria Day holiday. All subscribers will receive credit for the missed service day. The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Tuesday, May 22.

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Meghan Markle still needs something new, something borrowed and something blue, because she’s already locked up something old for the big day… her husband from “Suits.” Co-star Patrick J. Adams has been invited to the royal wedding. Gabriel Macht, who plays boss Harvey Specter on the legal drama, also received a coveted invite and will be attending.
(Actually, I believe she also has the ‘blue’ covered too…blue bloods, ya know…)
-TheBlast
★ Yes, Hugh Jackman has played Wolverine for years. He starred in “Les Miserables” and countless other heavy, sobering roles. But this might be the toughest, hardest thing he’s ever had to do. He actually ADMITTED he likes “Deadpool 2.” Jackman took to Instagram, and despite some reluctance, praised his frenemy Ryan Reynolds’s new movie as “a work of genius.” Between deep breaths, Jackman said: “I’m gonna say this once, and then delete it – really quickly. Deadpool 2 is a work of genius. It is epic. It is…can’t believe I said it.” “Deadpool 2” opens on Friday.
-MSN
★ Kirsten Dunst and her fiancé, actor Jesse Plemons, welcomed their first child, a baby boy, on May 3. Now, we finally know the baby’s name…Ennis. The entertainment website ‘The Blast’ obtained a copy of the birth certificate, which reveals that the baby’s full name is Ennis Howard Plemons.
-Cosmopolitan
★ Before “Keeping Up with The Kardashians”, there was “The Carol Burnett Show”. And Carol Burnett says she would definitely be lampooning the reality family if her legendary sketch show was still on the air. The 85-year-old confirmed to Andy Cohen during a game of “Has Carol Met Them” on his popular show “Watch What Happens Live!” that she has indeed met Kimmy K, and said, “We would’ve been doing the Kardashians, I guarantee it!”
(Take a number…)
-DailyMail
★ “Brooklyn Nine-Nine” has been saved by NBC after a huge outcry against its cancellation on social media. After it was confirmed on Thursday that the police sitcom, starring Andy Samberg, Chelsea Peretti and Terry Crews, had been cancelled by Fox after five seasons. Then on Friday, the show’s executive producer Michael Schur took to Twitter to share the news that the show would be back for season 6, as he put it, “Because the fans of the show went berzerk. We can’t thank you — or @NBC — enough.”
-Canoe
★ Kelly Clarkson is coming back for another season of “The Voice”.  She’ll be joined by another former “American Idol” favorite, Jennifer Hudson, for Season 15.  Clarkson made her debut as a judge on the show earlier this year and became an instant hit, while Oscar winner Hudson returns after serving as a coach on Season 13 last year.  They will face off against longtime judges Blake Shelton and Adam Levine, who have been with the show since its launch in 2011.
-TorontoSun

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Nathan Lane, Yara Shahidi, Kygo & Miguel
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Anthony Anderson, Glenda Jackson, Michael Pollan
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Milo Ventimiglia, Laurie Metcalf, Ashley Monroe, Matt Byrne
• ” The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Zooey Deschanel, John Mulaney, Arctic Monkeys
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Jamie Dornan, Jenna Fischer, Jena Friedman ( R )
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Oliver Hudson
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Terrence Howard
• “The Talk” (CBS): Jane Fonda, Don Johnson, Krista Smith, guest co-host Jodie Sweetin
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Anthony Anderson, Mary Steenburgen
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Sarah Paulson
• “Dancing with the Stars: Athletes” (ABC): The six remaining athletes perform; guest judge David Ross; three athletes are eliminated.
• “The Voice” (NBC): The top 8 artists perform for the coaches.
• “Running Wild With Bear Grylls” (NBC): Keri Russell and Bear journey through the Canary Islands; an escape using a paraglider.
• “Stanley Cup Playoffs” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Las Vegas vs. Winnipeg
• “NBA Playoffs” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Golden State vs. Houston

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Cardi B – has deleted her Instagram, perhaps due to her feud with Azealia Banks. Banks appeared on The Breakfast Club, calling Cardi an “illiterate, untalented rat” and a “caricature of a black woman.” Cardi responded, posting, “I’m from the hood. I speak how I speak, I am how I am. I did not choose to be famous, people choose me,” before deleting her account entirely.
• Beyoncé – her mom Tina Lawson says she put her daughters in counseling when they were kids to help them cope with Bey’s growing fame. Quote: “I took them to counselling so that the counselor could help Beyonce be more sensitive to Solange because she couldn’t stand her for a minute when they were little.”
• Christina Aguilera – has announced her first tour in a decade, in support of her “Liberation” album. The 22 city trek kicks off September 25th in Hollywood, FL and ends November 13th in St. Petersburg, FL. One Canadian date: Oct. 11 at Casino Rama, Orillia, ON.
• R. Kelly – With sexual abuse allegations against him escalating, Spotify has announced that it is removing the singer’s music from all playlists. The move is part of a new public hate content and hateful conduct policy in which states that Spotify believes “in openness, diversity, tolerance and respect, and we want to promote those values through music and the creative arts.”
• Avicii – The late DJ’s girlfriend Tereza Kačerová says she’s been trolled on social media. After writing an emotional tribute, she received a wave of abuse from online trolls, leading her to turn off comments after being accused of “causing” his death.
• Foo Fighters – Frontman Dave Grohl is planning to record a 25-minute song. While he insists his next project isn’t a ”solo record”, he’ll be doing all the writing and recording for the lengthy instrumental himself. Why? “Just because I can.”
• Fleetwood Mac – Axed guitarist Lindsey Buckingham says the reason he was fired from the band is due to the fact that “there were factions within the band that had lost their perspective.”
• Lenny Kravitz – is set to release his 11th studio album, “Raise Vibration”, on Sept. 7. The first single, ‘It’s Enough’ is out now.
• Blake Shelton – he and Kane Brown will give special performances on “The Voice” before the Season 14 finalists are revealed tomorrow. Panic! At the Disco will also perform. The episode will reveal the live results from contestants’ most recent performances, which will decide which aspiring stars move on in.
• Dustin Lynch – in spite of the lyrics to his hit ‘Good Girl’, he still hasn’t found ‘The One’ for him. He says the fact that he is still looking for her is probably what inspired the song. And his Mom wants him “to find her more than anybody”.

GOOGLE THE WORD ‘IRONY’:
Google wants to help you break the bad online habits that it helped you create. Big tech is in some hot water lately due to the addictive nature of apps and devices, the accumulation of personal data, and things like that. At their annual event for online developers last week, CEO Sundar Pichai announced that Google will offer new features that help you understand your digital habits and wean you off your 24/7 relationship with your devices and apps so you can power down and spend more time with friends and family. Google has come up with a number of “digital well-being” features lately, such as a new Android “Time Spent” dashboard that tells you exactly how long you spend on any given app, the number of notifications you receive, even the number of times you unlock your phone. The idea is to help you track your smartphone usage and regulate it.
(Of course, in order to be able to take advantage of this, you have to allow them to track your every move!)
(This is kind of like Mark Zuckerberg saying that he wants to protect your online data. Oh, wait…)
USAToday

CAPITAL PUNISHMENT:
NHL Ticket restrictions, especially during playoff games, aren’t unheard of. What is odd is enforcing a dress code. That’s what the Tampa Lightning are doing for their home games during their Eastern Conference final versus the Washington Capitals, which began Friday. Capitals fans in attendance are not allowed to wear red or anything with their team’s logo if their seats are in the Lightning’s ‘Lexus Lounge’, which includes seats against the glass, or in the ‘Chase Club’ luxury suites. Capitals fans are required to wear neutral colors. Fans wearing visiting team-branded apparel will be asked to remove that apparel while in these areas, according to the Lightning’s website. That’s if they can get inside the building at all…The Tampa Bay Lightning will not allow anyone who doesn’t reside in Florida to purchase a ticket through the team site or Ticketmaster. According to Lightning executive vice president of communications Bill Wickett, the measures are to enforce the representation of Lighting fans in the arena.
(Maybe it’s just for the fans’ own safety!)
(What would be funny is if the Leafs were playing Tampa. Same colors!)
(I’d wear my Capitals pants!)
-SportingNews

GET CRACKING:
It used to be that if you ordered a breakfast of bacon and eggs at a restaurant, you might hear your server ask the cook for a “heart-attack on a plate.” Now, maybe the bacon is the only part you have to worry about, because a new study shows that eggs might not be so bad for your cholesterol levels after all…at least if you’re diabetic. The study, published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, showed that a high-egg diet – 12 or more per week – compared to a low-egg diet – 2 or less per week – did not have adverse effects on cardiometabolic risk factors in adults with type 2 diabetes. Cardiovascular disease is the leading cause of death in the United States, with high blood cholesterol adding to that risk.
(THIS should go ‘over-well’!)
(12 eggs a week is a “hi-egg diet”? Rookies!)
(ABC)

BS CUTTING-EDGE VOCAB:
New terms leaking into our lingo …
• ‘Cry-it-outer’ – A person who practices or advocates letting babies cry themselves to sleep. (“Let him get used to it as a baby, rather than wait until he’s 30 like I did!”)
• ‘Insomnia identity’ – The erroneous belief that one has trouble sleeping, which leads to physical and psychological problems similar to those experienced by true insomniacs. (The only time I don’t have trouble sleeping is when the alarm is going off!)
• ‘Nutpicking’ – Claiming that the craziest or most outrageous member of a group is a typical representative of that group. (Generally speaking, how any political party supporter characterizes any member of an opposing political party…)
• ‘Ghost hotel’ – A residence that is used mostly or exclusively as short-term rental accommodation, particularly when offered through an online booking service such as Airbnb.
(Although I wouldn’t recommend you refer to it as that in your listing…!)
• ‘Behaviorceutical’ – A physical activity that improves mental health, particularly by reducing stress or anxiety. (“I’ll be back in a few minutes. Just heading out to pick up a case of behaviorceuticals.”
-WordSpy

BS CHRONOMETER 05.14.18

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1944 [74] George Lucas, Modesto CA, really rich semi-retired filmmaker (“Star Wars” series, “Indiana Jones” series, founder of Lucasfilm)

1969 [49] Danny Wood, Boston MA, pop singer (New Kids On the Block-‘Step by Step’, ‘Hangin’ Tough’)

1969 [49] Cate Blanchett, Melbourne, Australia, movie actress (“The Hobbit” films, 2004 Oscar-“The Aviator”) COMING UP…”Ocean’s 8″ 2018

1971 [47] Sofia Coppola, NYC, movie director (“The Bling Ring”, “Lost in Translation”)

1979 [39] Dan Auerbach, Akron OH, indie rock singer-guitarist (The Black Keys-‘Tighten Up’, ‘Lonely Boy’)

1981 [37] Mike Retondo, Villa Park IL, pop-rock guitarist-vocalist (Plain White T’s-‘1-2-3-4′, ‘Hey There Delilah’)

1984 [34] Mark Zuckerberg, White Plains NY, founder & CEO of Facebook/one-time ‘World’s Youngest Self-Made Billionaire’/net worth $71 billion (May 2018)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Dance Like a Chicken Day”. Everybody do the chicken dance now: “Dadda dadda dadda dah, dadda dadda dadda dah, dah dah dah dah, dum dum dum dum …”

• “Buttermilk Biscuit Day”, before the American Civil War, biscuits emerged as an inexpensive addition to meals. This sturdier bread product soon became popular as people realized it absorbed the gravy on their plate better than plain bread. Soon a new family favorite, biscuits and gravy, was created.

• ““Women’s Check-Up Day”, an annual event during “Women’s Health Week” to raise awareness of manageable steps women can take to improve their health. It’s also a reminder that regular check-ups are important.

• “National Underground America Day”, a day to honor the 6,000 or so North Americans who make their homes not only on the Earth but in it. Underground America Day began in 1974, when architect Malcolm Wells came up with the idea.

COMING UP . . .
[Tues] Dinosaur Day
[Tues] Chocolate Chip Day
[Wed] Love a Tree Day
[Wed] National Mimosa Day
This Week Is… Police Week
This Month Is…National Motorcycle Awareness Month

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1998 [20] 76.3 million TV viewers tune in for the series finalé of “Seinfeld” (NBC)

2006 [12] NBC-TV airs series finalé of long-running, award-winning White House drama “The West Wing”

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1998 [20] Legendary singer Frank Sinatra dies at 82

2011 [07] Country singer Blake Shelton weds country singer Miranda Lambert at Don Strange Ranch in Boerne, Texas before 550 guests, including Cee Lo Green, Charles Kelley (Lady Antebellum), Dierks Bentley, Kelly Clarkson, Martina McBride, Reba McEntire, and Trace Adkins

2016 [02] Following the release of Beyoncé’s ‘Lemonade’, all 12 tracks on the album debut on the Hot 100, breaking Taylor Swift’s 2010 record for most songs on the chart at the same time by a female artist

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2016 [02] Gabriel Medina becomes the first surfer ever to land the “Backflip” move in competition

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
✓ “Bookkeeper” is the only English word with three consecutive repeated letters and no hyphen.
✓ Kodak invented the digital camera in 1975 but kept it a secret, fearing it would jeopardize photographic film sales.
✓ According to research, an increase in muscle size with exercise may not be directly related to an increase in muscle strength.
✓ Rats are ticklish.
✓ Stress makes you fat.
✓ “Bae” is a Danish word for poop.
-UberFacts

BS MODERN WEDDING VOWS:
• I hereby confirm that I have read, understood and agree with the aforementioned Terms & Conditions…
• I solemnly swear to change my Facebook status to married and unfriend all my exes.
• I promise to love, honor, cherish and share my Netflix password.
• I promise to not respond to your text with just the letter ‘K’.
• I vow to love you like Kanye loves Kanye.
• I promise to “even” even when you can’t.
• With this ring, I need thee…to get a second job to help me finish paying it off.
• In sickness and in health. Unless you have a man cold.
• This marriage contract comes with a 7 year option to renew
• I Pika-choose you to be my lawfully wedded wife.
-Twitter

BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s the strangest place that you’ve fallen asleep?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
A politician is someone who will double cross that bridge when they come to it.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 15% of men say that they can do this better than women. What?
Answer: Ironing

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.

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