November 14, 2000 Edition: #1932
General Mills is planning to open “Cereal Adventure”, an amusement park at the Mall of America in Minneapolis based on its ad characters ‘Silly Rabbit’ (Trix), ‘Lucky the Leprechaun’ (Lucky Charms) and ‘Sonny the Bird’ (Cocoa Puffs). A good excuse to review the . . .
BS LEAST POPULAR BREAKFAST CEREALS:
• Nut ‘N Back Hair
• Honey Mustard Cherrios
• Kellogg’s Factory Floor Mystery Crunch
• Alpha Bugbits
• Ordinary K
• Fruit ‘n’ Flounder
• Puff Daddy Puffs
• Bounced Chex
• Honey Bunches Of Sheet Metal
• Lucky Charms & Cigarette Butts
• Cap’n Chretien
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY the holiday season compilation CD “Platinum Christmas” hits stores, with tracks from Britney Spears, ‘N Sync, Backstreet Boys, Christina Aguilera, Santana and TLC (at last, new holiday tunes to get sick of!) . . . TODAY Richard Hatch‘s book “101 Survival Secrets: How to Make a Million Dollars, Lose 110 lbs and Live Happily Ever After” hits bookstores (officially taking “Survivor” to the point of overkill) . . . Canadian director David Cronenberg is in final talks to direct a sequel to “Basic Instinct”, which ice pick-wielding star Sharon Stone has already committed to . . . Word is 64-year-old tomcat Burt Reynolds has been spotted hitting Toronto nightspots with a young blonde babe and it’s NOT his girlfriend of 9 years, Pam Seals (you’d think he would’ve learned about ‘a woman scorned’ from Loni Anderson). . . In order to impress boyfriend Russell Crowe, buzz has it Meg Ryan is planning to get implants to boost her to a C-cup (think positive, Meg — the cup’s already half full!).
TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
The FX-laden thriller “The Perfect Storm” stars George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg as commercial fishermen caught in a killer storm . . . Freddie Prinze Jr and Claire Forlani in the romanrtic comedy “Boys and Girls”, about two best friends who wind up in the sack together . . . “Fantasia 2000″, an update of the original Disney film with new interpretations of great works of classical music . . . The animated adventure sequel “Pokemon 2000″ seeks to squeeze even more ‘Pikachu’ money from your kid.
CALMING COLD:
Researchers in Germany have found a scientific basis for the term ‘chilling out’. Their study suggests that spending 3 minutes naked in a freezing room makes stress levels plummet. Seems sub-zero temps increase the brain’s serotonin levels, making the chilly willies feel calmer. (No wonder Yukoners are so laid back.)
BS AMAZIN’ FACTS:
• According to researchers, NOVEMBER is the month when the most hair falls out. (Coincidently also the biggest month for Drano sales.)
• Between the ages of 30 and 70, your nose may lengthen and widen by as much as half an inch. (You’re not getting older, you’re getting nosier!)
THE BULL SHEET 11.14.00
TODAY’S CELEBRITY BIRTHDAYS . . .
1948 [52] Prince Charles (Philip Arthur George of Wales), London ENG, heir to British throne
1962 [38] Laura San Giacomo, Denville NJ, TV actress (Maya Gallo-“Just Shoot Me”)
1964 [36] Run (Joseph Simmons), Queens NY, rapper (Run-DMC, the first hardcore rap group)
BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
TODAY is “Operating Room Nurse Day”, the highlight of “Operating Room Nurse Week”.
BS THINGS YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR IN AN OPERATING ROOM:
• “Someone call the janitor. We’re going to need a mop.”
• “Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness.”
• “This patient has already had kids, am I correct?”
• “Spot! Spot! Comeback with that! Bad dog!”
• “Hand me that…uh…that uh…..thingie.”
• “Ya know, there’s big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy’s got two of ’em.”
• “What do mean he wasn’t in for a sex change!”
ON THIS DAY IN THE ’90S . . .
1998 [02] Basketball bad boy Dennis Rodman weds ex-“Baywatch” babe Carmen Electra in Vegas (and they said it wouldn’t last)
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1666 [334] 1st recorded ‘blood transfusion’ (dog-to-dog)
1896 [104] 1st hydro-electric power plant at Niagara Falls begins operation
1982 [18] 1st ‘domed stadium’ in Canada opens (BC Place-Vancouver)
1994 [06] The Channel Tunnel (“Chunnel”) opens, linking Britain & France under English Channel
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] National Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day
[Fri] Take A Hike Day
[Sun] 95th Toronto Santa Claus Parade
National Geography Awareness Week
Child Safety and Protection Month
BULL’S BITS . . .
BS PHONE STARTERS:
• “What’s the biggest lie you’ve used on your resume in order to try and land a job?”
• “The world would be a better place if we could just get rid of . . .”
• “Would you rather marry someone for their money or their looks?” (A new Gallup Poll finds that most men (55%) would rather marry a pretty woman over an average-looking wealthy woman. But most women (34%) would prefer to wed an average-looking rich man over one that’s good-looking.)
• “If you could change one thing about your mate’s appearance, what would it be?”
BS TRIVIA:
Q: According to the Canadian Maritime Command, how big does your boat have to be before you can call it a ‘ship’?
A: 31 metres or 100 feet, although there are exceptions. For some reason, submarines, ferries and ore carriers are always called ‘boats’ no matter how large they are.
BS TAG LINE: A day without sunshine is like — night.
