Tuesday, November 20, 2007        Edition: #3659
Sheet For Brains!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Movie actress & “Ugly Betty” producer Salma Hayek says she was so upset by childhood jokes about her being flat-chested, she regularly prayed for more size (it seems someone answered) . . . NBC has announced it will air its Internet series “Quarterlife”, which follows the life of 6 young artists, on the TV network in 2008, marking the first time a program that originated online will be broadcast on a major network (did someone say writers strike?) . . . NBC-TV is auctioning items from some of the network’s top shows at its website, including “Heroes”, “30 Rock”, and “The Office”, with proceeds going to the United Way (you can tell they think the strike’s gonna drag on when …) . . . A former audience member on “Dr Phil” is attempting to sue the show for $100 million for discrimination after he was asked not to interact with the host or guests because he admitted he suffers from bipolar disorder (it’s claimed audience members have to sign waivers stating they aren’t mentally ill) . . . Word has it actress Nicole Kidman will reveal in the upcoming “Marie Claire” magazine that she suffered not just one (as previously reported) but 2 miscarriages during her 9-year marriage to actor Tom Cruise (so he wasn’t shooting blanks after all!) . . . 30-year-old actor Jonathan Rhys Meyers (“The Tudors”) has been charged with public drunkenness & breach of the peace at Dublin Airport after cops confronted him over erratic, abusive behavior at an airline desk – twice (seems he’s tumbled off the wagon after a stint in rehab) . . . The ongoing Hollywood writers’ strike is beginning to impact film production as both Oliver Stone’s new movie “Pinkville” starring Bruce Willis and the “Da Vinci Code” prequel “Angels & Demons” starring Tom Hanks have postponed production as the work stoppage grinds through a 3rd week (there may not be so many blockbusters NEXT SUMMER) . . . And former supermodel-turned-TV show host Janice Dickinson (“The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency”) says she hates Victoria Beckhams’s status as a style icon because she ‘lacks any fashion sense, she needs to gain weight, and she doesn’t even smile’ (meow).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Aretha Franklin – She’s blaming racism for the fact she wasn’t offered more movie roles during her long career. Not racism, hon … more of a size acceptance issue.
• James Brown – Civil rights activist Al Sharpton is continuing his tradition of giving away free turkeys before Thanksgiving in Augusta GA. Brown started the handout in 1991, and usually gave away more than a thousand birds gratis.
• Phil Vassar – The upcoming video for his new single “Love is a Beautiful Thing” will include snippets of wedding photos & video footage sent in by fans of their own weddings and receptions.
• Reba McEntire/Kelly Clarkson – They’ll join up for the 15-city “2 Worlds 2 Voices Tour” in JANUARY & FEBRUARY after teaming on the hit single “Because of You” for the “Reba Duets” album.
• Rod Stewart – A US Court of Appeals has overturned a $3-million award the Rio hotel in Vegas won after Stewart cancelled a show in 2000 because of throat surgery. Now a new jury will be required to evaluate the contract between the parties. And lawyers will get richer.
• Shakira – Word has it she pulled out of making her movie debut in the bigscreen version of fellow Colombian Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s novel “Love In The Time Of Cholera” because the role would have required that she appear naked.

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• Amy Winehouse – Her debut album, “Frank”, gets a North American release 4 years after it came out exclusively in the UK.
• Black Eyed Peas – will.i.am performs on a rerun of the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC).
• James Taylor – He flogs his new album “One Man Band” on the “Today Show” (NBC).
• Justin Timberlake – The DVD “FutureSex/LoveShow: Live From Madison Square Garden” hits shelves exclusively at Best Buy.
• Keith Urban – His “Greatest Hits: 18 Kids” is released, a compilation of his chart-toppers that
he considers his offspring. The project includes 2 newly recorded tracks and a DVD of 12 music videos.
• Nirvana – Their 1993 “MTV Unplugged in New York” is finally released as a DVD. It includes previously unreleased backstage access and 4 songs from the band’s soundcheck.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Hairspray” ( Musical Comedy ): An adaptation of the hit Broadway musical, in turn inspired by the 1988 John Waters cult classic movie. Newcomer Nikki Blonsky plays tubby teen ‘Tracy Turnblad’ who’ll do anything to get on a local TV dance show, even if it means defying her parents ‘Edna’ (John Travolta in drag) & ‘Wilbur’ (Christopher Walken). Co-stars James Marsden (“X-Men”), Queen Latifah, Michelle Pfeiffer, Zac Efron (“High School Musical”), and Allison Janney (“The West Wing”). Shot completely in Toronto & Hamilton ON. Also available in a “2-Disc Shake & Shimmy Special Edition” and a special “Holiday Giftset”.
• “Live Free or Die Hard” ( Action Thriller ): In his return to the signature character he originated in 1988’s “Die Hard” and continued in two ’90s sequels, Bruce Willis again plays never-quit cop ‘John McClane’, and this time he’s up against a wise-cracking hacker (Justin Long) and a mysterious online organization threatening ‘virtual terrorism’ that will shut down the entire USA. In a throwback to traditional Hollywood, almost all of the dozens of stunts are performed old school, without CGI animation. Also comes in a “2-Disc Unrated Widescreen Edition”.
• “The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause” ( Family Comedy ): In this (hopefully final) sequel to the 1994 blockbuster, ‘Santa’ (Tim Allen) faces 2 big problems: how to keep his new family happy, and how to stop ‘Jack Frost’ (Martin Short) from taking over Christmas. As in the previous 2 pics, Tim Allen had to don 75 lbs of costuming and makeup to play the role. Shot in Vancouver & Calgary.
• Also released TODAY: “Chappelle’s Show: The Series Collection”; “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation: The Complete 7th Season; “Monty Python’s Life of Brian (The Immaculate Edition)”; “Opry Video Classics”, an 8-DVD set featuring 120 performances by the likes of  George Jones, Johnny Cash, Loretta Lynn, Patsy Cline, Tammy Wynette, Waylon Jennings & many others; and “Titanic (10th Anniversary Edition)”.

SHOW US YOUR RETINA:
TODAY Japan is scheduled to become the 2nd country in the world to introduce biometric screening – including fingerprinting – of all foreign nationals entering the country. The US began a similar program in 2004 although, under the Homeland Security program, citizens from more than 2 dozen countries are exempt if their visit is less than 90 days.
– “Billboard” / CNN

TURKEY TURN-ONS:
Researchers at Penn State University who have been investigating what causes arousal among male turkeys have been impressed to observe that the birds will even attempt to mate with look-a-like dummies. Piece-by-piece they removed parts of the dummy and found that the males were still highly aroused when presented with no more than a head on a stick. However, it doesn’t work in reverse … the toms failed to get hot for a turkey with no head.
– PopBitch.com

2007 STYLE QUEENS:
According to a new ranking, here are the most fashionable femmes in famedom …
5. Jennifer Lopez
4. Penelope Cruz
3. Cameron Diaz
2. Drew Barrymore
1. Natalie Portman (due to her, quote: ‘unwavering faith in the cut and quality of a great dress’.)
— “InStyle Magazine”

NEW BS GIZMOS & GADGETS:
• Diamond-Covered Holiday Tree – Japan’s Takashimaya department store chain is selling a special decorative tree, actually a small tower of preserved roses with a teddy bear, which stands 40-cm-high (16 inches) and is decked out with some 100 carats of diamonds. Smaller diamond pieces are designed to add some twinkle, while 2- and 3-carat rocks provide some glow. This festive little ice peak is selling for a symbolic 200.7 million yen in the store’s 2007 year-end sale, which works out to about … $1.75 million. (“Ow Christmas Tree!”)
• Pink Baby Seal Tazer – What looks like an innocent baby seal toy is actually a deadly tazer, providing you with an element of surprise when it comes to keeping creeps away from you. Capable of delivering a 195 volt charge, this little baby will definitely expand your assailant’s vocabulary when it comes to the word pain. (Just what we need, sneakier ways of zapping people … ‘cause the cops aren’t electrocuting enough.)
NET: http://tinyurl.com/2c6g6f

DA NOSE KNOWS:
Scientists at the University of California have discovered the left and right nostrils give the brain different messages, meaning odors smell differently depending on which nostril you sniff through. When volunteers are asked to sniff 8 common odors in experiments, including peppermint and lemon, most rate them more pleasant when sniffed through the right nostril. (Unless, of course, they’re left-nosed.)
– “New Scientist”

LIFE BY THE NUMBERS:
A snapshot of who we are and what we do …
• 43% of us decide after the 1st chapter whether or not we’ll finish a book. (4% decide after the 1st page.)
• 42% of us have bought turkey and turkey products in the past year. (72% of them are consumed at Thanksgiving and Christmas.)
• 24% of us admit we have not exercised in the past month. (Month? Oh, we thought you said decade.)
• 22% of us have spread a rumor about a co-worker. (Well, we certainly haven’t … but we’ve heard that [co-host] has.)
• 19% of spouses say the most annoying thing about their better half is their laugh. (Hey, if that’s the worst of it, you’re lucky!
• 15% of us have blue eyes. (Down at the Bucket o’ Blood where we hang out, 5% have black eyes.)

DID YOU KNOW?
• Mall Santas from an agency operating in Sydney and Adelaide, Australia have been instructed to say ‘ha ha ha’ instead of ‘ho ho ho’ because ‘ho ho ho’ could be seen as offensive to women.
– news.com.au
• Canada’s oldest operating elevator is a bird-cage-like lift in the former Provincial Law Courts in Victoria BC. The 1889 building is now occupied by the Maritime Museum of British Columbia.
– “Via Magazine”
• At least 9 US cities have mottos boasting that they are …. ‘weird’. Why? People by nature look for a way to say they’re different, not average, according to Portland State University marketing professor Scott Dawson. Communities, just like people, seek a sense of self.
– ”The Oregonian”

BS CHRONOMETER 11.20.07

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1947 [60] Joe Walsh, Wichita KS, classic rock guitarist (“Life’s Been Good”, Eagles-“Hotel California”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1998)

1965 [42] Mike D (Diamond), NYC, rap/rock musician (Beastie Boys-“Ch-Check It Out”)

1975 [32] Dierks Bentley, Phoenix AZ, country singer (“Free & Easy [Down the Road I Go]”, “Every Mile a Memory”)

1977 [30] Josh Turner, Hannah SC, country singer (“Firecracker”, “Your Man”)

1978 [29] Nadine Velazquez, Chicago IL, TV actress (‘Catalina’ on “My Name Is Earl” since 2005)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Mexican Revolution Day”, celebrating the anniversary of the date in 1910 when the uprising to overthrow dictator Porfirio Díaz began.
NET: http://www.inside-mexico.com/revolucion.htm

• “Name Your PC Day”, a good day to ask listeners what pet names they’ve bestowed on theirs.

• “National Child Day in Canada”, first recommended by the UN  in 1989 as a day to highlight the importance of young people in our society.
NET: http://www.unac.org/en/news_events/un_days/children1.asp

• “Transgender Day of Remembrance”, the 9th annual set aside to memorialize those who’ve died due to anti-transgender hatred or prejudice.
NET: http://www.gender.org/remember/day/
NET: http://www.dayofsilence.org/tdr.html

• “Universal Children’s Day”, a UN day of activity devoted to promoting the welfare of the children of the world.
NET: http://www.un.org/depts/dhl/children_day/

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1947 [60] Britain’s Princess Elizabeth marries Duke Philip Mountbatten, later to become Queen Elizabeth II & Prince Philip (it’s their diamond wedding anniversary)

1982 [25] Drew Barrymore first hosts “Saturday Night Live” … at age 7

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1866 [141] Pierre Lalemont of Paris, France patents the ‘Rotary Crank Bicycle’ (this original bicycle is nicknamed the ‘bone shaker’)

1923 [84] 1st ‘Traffic Signal’ (Garrett Morgan designates red for ‘stop’, green for ‘go’, and yellow for ‘go like hell!’)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1994 [13] New England Patriots QB Drew Bledsoe sets NFL record for pass attempts (70) and completions (45) vs Minnesota Vikings (later sets record for making a mockery of an opponent on November 18, 2007 vs Bills)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] World Hello Day
[Wed] World Television Day
[Wed] “August Rush”; “Christmas in Wonderland”; “Enchanted”; “Hitman”; “Stephen King’s The Mist”; “This Christmas” open in movie theaters
[Thurs] US Thanksgiving Day
[Fri] Buy Nothing Day
[Fri] 2007 Vanier Cup (St Mary’s vs Manitoba @ Toronto)
This Week Is … Better Conversation Week
This Month Is … Pet Cancer Awareness Month

BULL’S BITS

BS SIGNS YOUR WIFE IS SECRETLY AN ADULT MOVIE STAR:
• Every couple of weeks she has to fly to California to ‘care for a sick aunt’.
• When in bed, she just lies there until you yell “Action!”.
• She keeps getting mail addressed to ‘Patty O’Plenty’.
• Whenever you go out, drooling men ask her for her autograph.
• She knows positions that would put a circus contortionist in the hospital.
• She wears a micro-miniskirt and 6-inch spike heels … to go grocery shopping.
• Just as you’re about to make love she asks, “What’s my motivation?”

TURKEY TIPS:
 World-renowned chef & star of “Kitchen Nightmares” (FOX), Gordon Ramsay, suggests these simple turkey tips to help make your holiday nightmare-free …
• Test the Turkey – To ensure your bird is cooked, skewer the thickest part of the thigh & check the juices. If they’re clear, the turkey is done; if they’re pink, the turk needs more oven time.
• Baste the Turkey – To avoid skin shriveling as it cools, baste the turkey as soon as it comes out of the oven.
• Rest the Turkey – Never slice the turkey straight from the oven! When it’s cooked, cover it with tin foil and let it rest for 25-30 minutes. Resting the meat allows the juices to redistribute in the bird, making it moist and tender.
• Slice the Turkey – Use the whole bird. Carve the breast first and then start on the legs.
• Gravy – Don’t forget the pan juices from the turkey-roasting tray! It’s where all the turkey flavor is stored and makes a great base for your gravy.
– StarPulse News

BS INTERVIEW:
WEDNESDAY the Parkside Pub in Huntley IL serves up an odd pre-holiday dinner that’s become an  American Thanksgiving tradition with patrons for more than 2 decades – turkey testicles. Over 800 lbs (about 30,000) of the gobbler nuggets will be deep fried in a secret batter and sold by the dozen. Afionados say they taste something like a mushroom.
PHONER: 847.669.8496
NET: http://www.turkeytesticlefestival.com/

BS QUICK-PICK TRIVIA:
Lillian Moller Gilbreth (1878-1972), who was a mother of 12, invented the electric food mixer and was also the first to patent this …
a. Disposable diapers.
b. The baby monitor.
c. The trash can with a foot pedal to open the lid. [CORRECT]
– Almanac.com

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Anything you do can get you fired … including doing nothing.

BS PHONE STARTERS:
Which TV show does your workplace most resemble?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: A survey of Canadian finds Quebeckers are most likely to try THIS in order to get lucky.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Say I love you.

Today’s Question: 10% of American women will not allow THIS in their home for Thanksgiving.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Football.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
You have to take the bad with the worst.