The Bull Sheet

October 1 2019

Tuesday, October 1, 2019        Edition: #6542

You Really Know Your Sheet!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ “Batwoman” Ruby Rose has revealed she needed emergency surgery after a serious injury left her facing the possibility of paralysis. Sharing the details on Instagram, she wrote: “To everyone asking about my new Pez dispenser scar on my neck… A couple of months ago I was told I needed an emergency surgery or I was risking becoming paralyzed. I had herniated two discs doing stunts, and they were close to severing my spinal chord. I was in chronic pain and yet couldn’t feel my arms.” Rose, who appeared on “Orange Is the New Black”, was tapped last year to play Batwoman in the upcoming CW series, which premieres on Sunday on The CW.
-MSN
★ Ellen DeGeneres has landed a lucrative deal to bring four new series to HBO Max. They include a design contest called “Ellen’s Home Design Challenge”, a dating show called “First Dates Hotel”, an animated children’s series called “Little Ellen”, and a docuseries titled “Finding Einstein”. In addition to working on the new shows, Ellen also signed a three-year extension on her syndicated daytime talk show earlier this year, which will keep her on air until at least 2022.
-Canoe
★ Robert De Niro accidentally dropped a few F-bombs live on CNN on Sunday, and they aired before the censors could catch it. De Niro was being interviewed by Brian Stelter as the two discussed President Donald Trump and Fox News. De Niro grumbled an apology, but seemed generally unapologetic for his language. He addressed the broader issue of policing civility in political discussions, particularly surrounding a president as outspoken and unconventional as President Trump.
(Speaking of outspoken…!)
-PopCulture
★ Oprah Winfrey shocked attendees at a North Carolina fundraiser by announcing a donation of more than $1 million toward the United Negro College Fund. At the time of Winfrey’s address, a running tally at the event showed that about $1.15 million had been raised. That’s when Winfrey said she was going to match the total, prompting a standing ovation from the stunned audience.
-MSN
★ Tyler Perry will be honored with the 2,675th star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame today. The actor, playwright, filmmaker, and comedian was named by Forbes as the highest paid man in entertainment in 2011, earning $130 million in the previous year.
-WalkofFame

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Joaquin Phoenix, Elizabeth Olsen, Lukas Nelson & Promise of the Real
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Lin-Manuel Miranda, Chris Colfer, the Broadway cast of “Freestyle Love Supreme”
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Rachel Maddow, Thom Yorke
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Ta-Nehisi Coates, Gary Gulman, Roy Mayorga
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Michelle Pfeiffer, Chiwetel Ejiofor, George Salazar, Mj Rodriguez
• “Lights Out with David Spade” (COMEDY): Tony Rock, Patton Oswalt, Lauren Sivan
• “Conan” (TBS): Gerard Butler (R)
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Jenny McCarthy, Gina Kirschenheiter
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Michael Strahan, Sara Haines, Keke Palmer, Allison Tolman
• “The Talk” (CBS): Walton Goggins
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Rami Malek, Kristin Chenoweth, guest co-host Anderson Cooper
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Tiffany Haddish, Oprah Winfrey
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Mike Colter, Ally Brooke, Danny Trejo, Sasha Farber
• “Outdaughtered” (TLC):  Season 6 premiere
• “The Voice” (NBC): The Blind Auditions, Part 4

BS MUSIC NOTES:

• Beyoncé and Adele — have recorded a song with OneRepublic. Singer Ryan Tedder says that the pair sing on a forthcoming track and are joined by Coldplay’s Chris Martin on piano. Beyoncé and Martin collaborated on Coldplay’s ‘Hymn For The Weekend’ in 2015.
• Celine Dion — A crew member was electrocuted while helping to set up for her show in Montreal last week. He was thrown from the rigging 50 feet above the stage, dislocating his shoulder, but was caught by a safety harness and survived.
• Ricky Martin – He and Jwan Yosef are expecting their fourth child together by surrogate. Martin made the happy announcement at the 23rd annual Human Rights Campaign National Dinner in Washington D.C. on Saturday. The pair already have 11-year-old twin sons Valentino and Matteo, and daughter Lucia, who is 9 months old.
• Aaron Carter — has had an image of Rihanna tattooed on his face. He published the striking image on social media shortly after saying he wanted to be ”left alone” amid allegations he threatened to kill his brother Nick’s pregnant wife. Aaron captioned the photograph: ”IM THE BIGGEST THING IN MUSIC RIGHT NOW. I CANT BE DENIED. FACT CHECK ME.
• Rock and Roll Hall of Fame — Incoming chairman John Sykes plans to broaden the reach of the Hall to match “spirit that connects with young people.” He also announced that the 2020 induction ceremony will be broadcast live on HBO as he seeks to establish the “2.0” version of the organization.
• Blondie – Singer Debbie Harry’s new memoir “Face it” is out today. In it, she writes of sharing her cocaine with Iggy Pop and David Bowie…who showed her his ‘notorious’ manhood as they got high. She also talks about surviving an attempted abduction by a man she now believes was serial killer Ted Bundy.
• Ramones – Released a deluxe edition of “It’s Alive” to mark the 40th anniversary of the original live recording. The package not only features the previously released live album, but also includes three additional complete Ramones shows recorded prior to the gig at the Rainbow in London.
• Blake Shelton — is the featured artist on a new track by pop/Latin/rap artist Pitbull. ‘Get Ready’ samples the iconic track ‘Black Betty’ —which has been covered by a number of artists including Ram Jam and Tom Jones—and the arrangement features a mixture of pop, country and Latin influences. The song appears on Pitbull’s new album, “Libertad 458”.
• Zac Brown – His new solo album, “Controversy” dropped on Friday, just a week after his band released their latest, “The Owl”. In a video to introduce Controversy, Brown says, “I wanted to create all these other genres of music that I love to do…I love country, but I love other things, too. So this is my outlet. This is my chance to be an artist and be creative and it’s another side.”

THIS WEEK’S VIDEO RELEASES: (Streaming and/or DVD)
• “Toy Story 4” (G, Animation/Family):  When a new toy called “Forky” joins Woody and the gang, a road trip alongside old and new friends reveals how big the world can be for a toy. (Tom Hanks, Tim Allen, Annie Potts)
• “Stuber” (R-Rated, Action/Comedy):  When a mild-mannered Uber driver named Stu picks up a passenger who turns out to be a cop hot on the trail of a brutal killer, he’s thrust into a harrowing ordeal where he desperately tries to hold onto his wits, his life and his five-star rating. (Dave Bautista, Kumail Nanjiani)
• “Marianne & Leonard: Words of Love” (R-Rated, Documentary):  An in-depth look at the relationship between the late musician Leonard Cohen and his Norwegian muse Marianne Ihlen. (Leonard Cohen, Judy Collins)
• “Anna and the Apocalypse” (R-Rated, Comedy/Horror):  A zombie apocalypse threatens the sleepy town of Little Haven – at Christmas – forcing Anna and her friends to fight, slash and sing their way to survival, facing the undead in a desperate race to reach their loved ones. (Ella Hunt, Malcolm Cumming)

TRUE STORY:
(***Caution “F” word***) If you have children of a certain age, you’re probably very aware of the 2011 best selling book “Go the F**k to Sleep” by Adam Mansbach, which struck a chord with parents everywhere. Written like a children’s book, with colorful cartoon-like illustrations, it was a really a book for adults, a perfect in-joke for sleep-deprived moms and dads who only want one thing for their children…sleep. Well, the sequel is on the way. “F**k, Now There are Two Of You” is about a household that has grown to a family of four, and the fact that (surprise, surprise…) having two kids is harder than having just one. And in an example of art imitating life, author Mansbach’s family has also recently grown to include two children.
(Apparently they didn’t spend ALL their time trying to get the little one to go to sleep!)
(Caution: Don’t become such a tired Mommy or Daddy that you actually read this book to your kid!)
(If this book doesn’t sell well, would it be classified as an “F-bomb”?)
-NYPost

NO CAPS:
Daniel Colin James, a writer for the ‘Ideas and Perspectives’ website Medium.com says that it is time to banish the “Caps Lock’ button from the keyboard. He writes that the Caps Lock function was invented for typewriters in the 1960s, so those typing out addresses on envelopes had a way of keeping upper case engaged without changing the number buttons into their upper-case counterparts, the dollar signs, and number symbols and all those. Caps Lock was also used as a way to provide a difference between headers and body at the time as well, because on a typewriter, we didn’t have all the font sizes and styles that we have at our disposal now. James writes that now, the All Caps button is not only unnecessary, it also takes up a lot of valuable real estate on an already crowded keyboard.
(Actually, without Caps Lock, a lot of online arguments might never get started!)
(The least they could do is label the ‘Caps Lock’ button in all-caps!)
(What would they replace it with? The “All Upper-Case” button?)
-Medium

SMALL WAYS TO HELP THE ENVIRONMENT RIGHT NOW:
⇒ Turn the tap off when brushing your teeth:  That simple act can save 200 gallons (760 litres) of water per month. (I already do that…who do you think pays the water bill?)
⇒ Combine errands:  Take one trip to do multiple things and save gas, time, and the environment. Car engines run more efficiently once they’re warmed up, and you’ll drive less in the long run. (I still haven’t figured out a way to drop off and pick up the dry cleaning in the same trip…)
⇒ Get to know what “expired” means:  Don’t be fooled by a “sell by” date. Even some “use by” dates are merely a suggestion. You could be unnecessarily be wasting food. (And your teenager will eat it no matter WHAT the date says!)
⇒ Buy a reusable coffee cup:  The average office worker uses 500 disposable cups per year. Use your own. (I would, but there is no rim to “roll up”!)
⇒ Choose used:  There are plenty of products that you can buy used (electronics, clothing, furniture) at a fraction of the cost of new, and at less cost to the environment too. (I’m starting to think that, due to my paycheck, I’m a lot more environmentally friendly than I realized!)
⇒ Skip baths:  A shower is more environmentally friendly. A 5-minute rinse uses 10-25 gallons of water, while a bath requires up to 30. (Better yet, share a shower and save even more!)
-MSN

DID YOU KNOW?
Almost every company has too many meetings, and it’s getting worse. Most executives’ average work week is 47 hours. Because it has been determined that they spend, on average, half their time each week in meetings, and work for about 45 years, that means they spend about 22 years of their career in meetings.
-MIT/Sloan

BS CHRONOMETER 10.01.19

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1924 [95] Jimmy Carter, Plains GA, US President (39th president of the United States, who became the first to receive a Nobel Peace Prize after leaving office)

1935 [84] [Dame] Julie Andrews (Wells), Walton-on-Thames UK, movie actress (“The Princess Diaries”, “The Sound of Music”)/Broadway actress (“Victor/Victoria”, “My Fair Lady”)

1950 [69] Randy Quaid, Houston TX, movie actor (“Brokeback Mountain”, “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation”)/actor Dennis Quaid’s brother

1969 [50] Zach Galifianakis, Wilkesboro NC, movie actor (“The Hangover” films, “The Muppets”)/web host (“Between Two Ferns With Zach Galifianakis”)

1980 [39] Sarah Drew, Charlottesville VA, TV actress (‘Dr April Kepner’ on “Grey’s Anatomy” 2009-18)

1989 [30] Brie Larson, Sacramento CA, movie actress (“The Room”, “Captain Marvel”) COMING UP…“Captain Marvel 2”

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “October”, which actually means ‘8th month’ but has been the 10th month ever since New Year’s Day was moved from March to January. At other times in history October has been called Germanicus, Herculeus, and Faustinus. So, happy First of Faustinus!

• “Homemade Cookies Day”. Nummers! What’s the absolute best kind? Chocolate chip? Oatmeal & raisin? Peanut butter? Shortbread? Dirt balls?

• “International Day of Older Persons”, an annual observance begun by the UN to recognize the contributions of older persons and to examine issues that affect their lives.

• “International Music Day”, initiated in 1975 by Lord Yehudi Menuhin to encourage the promotion of musical art among all sections of society.

• “National Day of the People’s Republic of China”, honoring the PRC’s founding on October 1, 1949 with a ceremony at Tiananmen Square. It’s celebrated throughout mainland China, Hong Kong, and Macau with a variety of festivities, including fireworks and concerts.

• “World Vegetarian Day”, to create awareness of the ethical, environmental, health, and humanitarian benefits of a vegetarian lifestyle.  NET: http://www.worldvegetarianday.org

• (***Note: Many countries celebrated “National Coffee Day on Sunday, Sept. 29***) “International Coffee Day”, celebrating one of the world’s favorite beverages. It’s also to promote fair trade coffee and to raise awareness of the plight of coffee growers. Today is also “Biscotti Day”, an appropriate accompaniment for any cup of strong coffee.
YOU KNOW YOU’RE DRINKING TOO MUCH COFFEE IF …
✓ You call a radio talk show and they ask you to “turn yourself down”.
✓ You finish your 60-minute presentation before everyone is seated.
✓ You’re passing everybody on the freeway when suddenly you realize … you’re not in a car.
✓ You can keyboard 70 words per minute … with your feet.
✓ Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
✓ You have a picture of your coffee mug … on your coffee mug.
✓ Your boss asks to meet with you at 2, and you eagerly ask, “AM or PM?”
✓ Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Balloons Around the World Day
[Wed] Name Your Car Day
[Thurs] Mean Girls Appreciation Day
[Thurs] National Boyfriend Day

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2009 [10] David Letterman reveals on “Late Show” that he’s the target of an attempted extortion scheme that threatened to expose his sexual relationships with a number of his female staffers (CBS producer Robert Joel Halderman is eventually arrested for grand larceny)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1991 [28] The world’s most valuable golf glove — the original, crystal-studded one Michael Jackson wore – is stolen from the Motown Museum in Detroit. MC Hammer offers a $50,000 reward for the glove’s return, but it’s recovered by police two days later.

2017 [02] During Jason Aldean’s headlining set at the Route 91 Harvest festival on the Las Vegas strip, Stephen Paddock opens fire from his suite at the nearby Mandalay Bay hotel, killing 58 and injuring over 500 in the deadliest mass shooting in US history

TODAY’S FIRST . . .

1982 [37] The first music ‘CD’ is released, Billy Joel’s “52nd Street”

TODAY’S RECORD . . .

1997 [22] Gul Mohammed, world’s shortest man at 22.1 inches (56 cm), dies at 36

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ 75% of the cars that Rolls Royce has ever produced are still on the road today.
✓ Seven people have keys with the power to restart the World Wide Web in the event of a catastrophic event.
✓ Every 7 years you lose about half of your friends and replace them with new people.
✓ A study found that politicians tend to express lies and inaccuracies through longer sentences.
✓ The average beehive needs 40-70 pounds of honey to survive the winter.
✓ The inventor of the Chocolate Chip Cookie sold the idea to Nestle Toll House in return for a lifetime supply of chocolate.
-FactSlides

BS BRITISH BLOCKBUSTERS:
• The Good, The Bad and The Ghastly
• 50 Shades of Earl Grey
• I Say, Darling…It appears as Though I’ve Inadvertently Reduced the Height of Our Offspring. My Apologies
• The British Empire Strikes Back
• I Know What You Did Last Summer, But I Shan’t Mention it Again Because it Was All Rather Sordid
• Beatlesjuice
• Brexit at Tiffany’s
• ShowBoaty McBoatface
• Uncle Buckingham
• The Fast and the Bloody Livid
• William and Edward’s Bloody Good Time
• Gone With the Windsors
-Twitter

Best of BS . . .
BS WHYZITS:

• Whyzit ‘medium’ is the only size that doesn’t come in ‘extra’?
• Whyzit people look up when they think?
• Whyzit the road signs that say ‘SLOW CHILDREN’ have a picture of a running child?
• Whyzit the severity of an itch is proportional to your inability to reach it?
• Whyzit you never find something you’ve lost until you replace it?

BS PHONE STARTER:
Name something that you would never do…that many others have.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
You know you waited too long when laundry day becomes a formal event.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  Male online daters get 19% fewer responses from women when they open an email with THIS word. What is it?
Answer:  Howdy

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you.

 

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