Friday, June 21, 2024 — Edition: #7739
The Sheet Hits the Fans!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
[***UPDATE***] ★ Donald Sutherland, a veteran actor known for roles in “M*A*S*H,” “Klute” and “The Hunger Games,” has died at age 88. He passed away Thursday in Miami after a long illness, according to his agency. Tall and known for his intensity on screen, Sutherland earned an Emmy for his role as a Soviet official in the HBO movie “Citizen X,” as well as a pair of Golden Globes. His career spanned more than 50 years and 140 film credits, including recently in the limited series “Trust” as oil tycoon J. Paul Getty. His actor son Kiefer Sutherland wrote of his father on Instagram: “I personally think one of the most important actors in the history of film. Never daunted by a role, good, bad or ugly.”
-CTV
★ Travis Scott, who shares 2 children with Kylie Jenner, was arrested early yesterday in Miami Beach. The 33-year-old ‘goosebumps’ rapper, whose real name is Jacques Webster, was booked into into the Turner Guilford Knight Correctional Center on a charge of disorderly intoxication, as well as trespassing property after warning. Police had been called shortly after 1:00am to a marina on a report of people fighting on a yacht, according to a Miami Beach Police arrest affidavit. It says that at first, he complied with police commands to sit down, but then disregarded them. Scott submitted bond of $650, and was released.
-NBC
★ Kourtney Kardashian is sharing more insight into her and Travis Barker’s 7-month-old son’s health. “The Kardashians” star opened up about why she underwent emergency fetal surgery during her pregnancy in September, sharing in yesterday’s episode that there was fluid in Rocky Barker’s lungs. She said the couple had a “terrifying scare”, explaining that the condition is “super rare and lucky that we caught it.” She said she is “so grateful” for the successful surgery, that she has “no words.”
-E!
★ Justin Timberlake is vowing to fight his drunk driving charge. His attorney released a statement saying: “[We] look forward to vigorously defending Mr. Timberlake against these allegations. We will have a lot to say at the appropriate time. He is currently awaiting full discovery from the DA’s office.” Timberlake was charged with one count of driving while intoxicated and 2 other traffic violations, and released without bail with a hearing set for July 26. He has 2 scheduled concerts in Chicago this weekend.
-TheWrap
★ Matthew McConaughey almost left Hollywood for good after being typecast as a “rom-com” actor. The “Failure to Launch” star took 2 years off from the glitz and the glamour when he felt he wasn’t getting enough meaty parts, before returning to star in more dramatic roles like “The Lincoln Lawyer”, “True Detective”, and his Academy Award-winning turn in “The Dallas Buyers Club”. He told actor Glen Powell in Interview magazine: “I’ve usually zigged when I felt like Hollywood wanted me to zag.” He felt that after his “rom-com years”, he “wanted to try some other stuff. Of course I wasn’t getting it, so I had to leave Hollywood for 2 years.” He added: “Dude, it was scary”.
-ContactMusic
★ A sequel to Mel Brooks’ 1987 comedy “Spaceballs” is in development. Josh Gad, best known for his work on Broadway in “The Book of Mormon” is set to star, and will produce alongside Brooks. Plot details are being kept under wraps. The original film starred Bill Pullman, John Candy and Rick Moranis in a parody of both the “Star Wars” franchise and other popular sci-fi franchises like “Star Trek” and “Alien.”
-Variety
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): TBA
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Ariana Grande, Ron Howard, Richard Gadd, Jessica Gunning (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): TBA
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Jon Lovett, Josh Sharp, Aaron Jackson (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Will Ferrell, Tico Torres (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Eva Longoria, Anthony Michael Hall
• “The Talk” (CBS): Lisa Vanderpump, Joy Bryant
• “Live with Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Anderson Cooper, Nikki and Brie Garcia, the Harlem Globetrotters, Phillip Phillips
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Austin Butler, Jodie Comer, Melissa Rivers, Wade Bowen
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Jenifer Lewis on her miraculous recovery after a devastating fall while on vacation.
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Ellie Goulding
• “U.S. Olympic Trials” (NBC): Swimming; Diving
• “Guy’s All-American Road Trip” (FOOD): Guy and his family sample Wyoming-style pizza and made-to-order chuckwagon steaks; a visit to the Buffalo Bill Center of the West; A campground showdown.
• “Stanley Cup Final” (Check local listings): Game #6: Florida Panthers @ Edmonton Oilers
SATURDAY:
• “The Bad Orphan” (LIFE): Jessica and Karl are elated when they adopt a troubled 8-year-old named Gabby. But as Gabby’s unsettling behavior worsens, Jessica becomes increasingly concerned that she’s now a threat to the family.
• “Two Scoops of Italy” (HALL): When an American chef travels to a quaint village in Italy, she falls in love with the flavors, the culture, and the gentleman who helped her discover it all.
• “Stevie Van Zandt: Disciple” (HBO): His life and career as a musician, songwriter, producer, activist, actor, and right-hand man to Bruce Springsteen.
SUNDAY:
• “2024 Copa America (Check local listings): United States vs. Bolivia; Uruguay vs. Panama
• “Orphan Black: Echoes” (AMC): Series premiere
• “Biography: Alice Cooper” (A&E): Explores the highs and lows of an incredible journey and genre-defining artist.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Sabrina Carpenter – Her monster smash ‘Espresso’ took the #1 spot in Billboard’s “The 50 Best Songs of 2024 (So Far)” list. The rest of the top 5, in order: ‘Not Like Us’-Kendrick Lamar; ‘Good Luck, Babe!’- Chappell Roan; ‘Texas Hold ‘Em’-Beyoncé; and ‘Lunch’ from Billie Eilish. And because you had to know, Shaboozey’s ‘Tipsy’ is #6.
• Lil Nas X – will have a new song on the “Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F soundtrack”. ‘HERE WE GO!’ drops June 28. Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F, starring Eddie Murphy, hits Netflix on July 3.
• BLACKPINK – Lisa has announced that her new solo single ‘Rockstar’ will be released on June 27. Earlier this month, she launched her own TikTok account with a post teasing the song – and gained 1 million followers in just over 2 hours. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mrxuutzv
• AC/DC – Science has confirmed they are the top rock band for drinking. The group notched 4 of the Top 10 rock drinking songs in a study conducted by whiskey retailer Flask & Barrel. AC/DC claimed the #1 spot with 1990’s ‘Thunderstruck’, #2 with 1979’s ‘Highway to Hell’, #4 with 1980’s ‘Back in Black’, and #8 with ‘You Shook Me All Night Long’, also from 1980.
• The Jesus and Mary Chain and The Psychedelic Furs – are teaming up for a fall tour of North America. Launching at Philadelphia’s Franklin Music Hall on Sept. 29, the Scottish indie-rockers and the English post-punk veterans will visit 27 cities, wrapping at the YouTube Theater in Inglewood CA on Nov. 9.
• Scott Weiland – His widow Jamie Wachtel Weiland said in a podcast interview that he did not die of an overdose. Quote: “Because he had drugs in his system, the coroner had to rule it an overdose. But the truth is Scott died because the main artery in his left ventricle was 95% (blocked). That came from 10 years of heroin use (and) an entire adult life of chain smoking.”
• Zach Bryan – has helped Americana artist Noeline Hoffman score her first-ever Billboard Hot 100 hit. Their duet ‘Purple Gas’ has debuted at #70, with 6.9 million official U.S. streams. The song will appear on Bryan’s upcoming album “The Great American Bar Scene”.
• HARDY – has gotten some new ink – in a very painful place. He showed it off on Instagram, posting a pic of the new tattoo on the inside of his lower lip. It says: “JIM BOB” – the title of his latest single. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/893vzkm4
• Post Malone – has dropped details of what’s believed to be his country album. He posted a pic of a sign with this written on it: “The name of the new Post Malone Album is …F 1,000,000,000,000” To clarify things, he wrote: “Sup mothers…F-1 Trillion August 16th.” His Morgan Wallen collab ‘I Had Some Help’ is near the top of the Country Airplay Chart, and the new duet with Blake Shelton called ‘Pour Me a Drink’ comes out today. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/33xd3pym
• Kane Brown — His family has grown, again! He and wife Katelyn have welcomed their 3rd baby together, a boy. They confirmed the news on Instagram, posting a carousel of photos of their new arrival, and writing: “Krewe Allen Brown 6.18.” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/469nb69r
• CMA Fest – The annual TV special featuring performances from the Nashville festival will air on ABC on Tuesday. “CMA Fest” will highlight 30 performances from this year’s event, including Luke Bryan, HARDY, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Carly Pearce, Blake Shelton, Keith Urban, and many more. The show will be hosted by Jelly Roll and Ashley McBryde.
SHOOTING THE BULL
THIS WEEK’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “The Bikeriders” (R, Crime/Drama): After a chance encounter, Kathy is drawn to Benny, member of the motorcycle club the Vandals. As the club transforms into a dangerous underworld of violence, Benny must choose between Kathy and his loyalty to the club. (Jodie Comer, Austin Butler, Tom Hardy) Tomatometer: 85%
• “The Exorcism” (R, Horror/Mystery): A troubled actor begins to exhibit disruptive behavior while shooting a horror film. His estranged daughter wonders if he’s slipping back into his past addictions — or if there’s something more sinister at play. (Russell Crowe, Sam Worthington, Ryan Simpkins) Tomatometer: 44%
• “Kinds of Kindness” (R, Comedy/Drama — Limited): Follows a man without choice who tries to take control of his own life; a cop who is alarmed that his wife, who was missing-at-sea, has returned, but seems different; and a woman determined to find a specific someone, who is destined to become a prodigious spiritual leader. (Emma Stone, Jesse Plemons, Willem Dafoe) Tomatometer: 79%
THE INTEL ON ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE:
❑ McDonald’s is pulling the plug on the artificial intelligence ordering technology it was testing at more than 100 drive-thrus in the US, after the systems repeatedly annoyed guests by fumbling orders and mistaking instructions. As evidenced in social media videos, the AI, called the “Automated Order Taker,” made frustrating mistakes, like adding ketchup, bacon, and butter packets to ice cream orders, serving up 9 sweet teas instead of one, and adding hundreds of dollars worth of chicken nuggets to an order. McDonald’s said “a voice-ordering solution for drive-thru will be part of the restaurants’ future”. (But when you really think about it, who HASN’T been fired by McDonald’s at some point?)
❑ Universal, the biggest music company in the world, has signed a deal with AI start-up Soundlabs to create what it calls “official ultra-high fidelity vocal models for artists using their own voice data for training”. What does this mean? Basically, singers signed to the label can train AI models using their own voices, so that, Jon Bon Jovi, for example, could make a new album using AI-generated vocals without ever putting his own voice to tape. The company says artists will retain ownership of the results and will have full artistic approval on how they’re used. (Yay! Bon Jovi will sound like Bon Jovi again!)
-CNN, Global, MorningBrew, LouderSound
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ Twenty-three sets of twins have graduated from a Massachusetts middle school, making up about 10% of the 8th-grade class. The identical and fraternal twins graduated from Pollard Middle School in Needham. What’s more, another student, who is also a twin, graduated — but her brother attends a different school. The principal said the school typically has “anywhere from 5 to 10 sets at most” in the graduating class. Twins account for around 3% of live births in the US, according to the National Center for Health Statistics. (Maybe there’s something in the water?)
➢ Residents of an Indian village called police about a floating human body in their pond – but it turned out he was just resting on a hot summer day. At first, the people of Reddypuram Kovelakunta, didn’t panic when they noticed a motionless human body in their pond. They tried calling out to it when they first spotted it, around 7am, but got no answer. When they noticed in early afternoon that it still hadn’t moved, police were called. Emergency services rushed to the scene, where they did find a human body floating in the water. But to their surprise, what looked like a corpse turned out to be an inebriated man … napping in the water. (There’s DEFINITELY something in the water there – a drunk dude!)
-UPI, OddityCentral
FICTIONAL BANDS WHO HIT THE CHARTS:
✪ Alvin & The Chipmunks: The sped-up voices of David Saville had a number of hit singles in the 1960s, including ‘Ragtime Cowboy Joe’ and a version of ‘Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer’. Their lone #1 hit was their 1958 debut ‘The Chipmunk Song’.
✪ The Archies: The fictional group from “The Archie Show” cartoon charted 6 songs from 1968-70, including what would have been their concert encore . . . if they ever played a concert: the 1969 #1 ‘Sugar, Sugar’.
✪ The Partridge Family: The 1970s sitcom family included Shirley Jones, Danny Bonaduce and later real-life pop star David Cassidy. Among their 9 charting songs was the 1970 #1 ‘I Think I’m in Love’.
✪ The Blues Brothers: Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi premiered in a 1978 “SNL” sketch, and hit the chart with their version of ‘Soul Man’, even before their 1980 movie premiered.
✪ The Muppets (and offshoots): spawned a number of hit singles, including Kermit’s classic ‘Rainbow Connection’ from “The Muppet Movie”, and a holiday collab with John Denver, which hit #13 on the Country Albums chart.
✪ Spinal Tap: The classic mockumentary subjects’ hilariously-titled ‘Break Like the Wind’ reached #61 in 1992. And get set for more. The film’s sequel is filming now, with cameos from Elton John and Garth Brooks.
✪ The Wonders: The Beatles-esque act from the 1996 Tom Hanks film “That Thing You Do!” hit #41 with the title track, which was written by the late Fountains of Wayne bassist Adam Schlesinger.
✪ The Soggy Bottom Boys: The fictional country-bluegrass band from the 2000 Coen Brothers film “O Brother, Where Art Thou?” hit #35 on the Hot Country Songs chart with ‘I Am a Man of Constant Sorrow’.
✪ Hannah Montana: Before Miley was Miley, her “Hannah Montana” character charted 20 songs on the Hot 100, including the #10 hit ‘He Could Be the One’ in 2009.
✪ 4*Town: The pop heartthrobs from the 2022 Pixar film “Turning Red” reached #49 on Billboard’s Hot 100 with their single ‘Nobody Like U’.
✪ Daisy Jones & The Six: The fictional soft-rock band from the Prime Video miniseries of the same name became an actual charting band in 2023. Not only did the soundtrack spend 5 weeks at #1 on the Soundtracks chart, the series’ breakout song ‘Look at Us Now (Honeycomb)’ peaked at #23 on the Rock Songs chart.
-Billboard
DID YOU KNOW?
Summer allergies are nothing to sneeze at. And you might be able to keep it that way if you follow this expert advice at keeping the congestion, coughing, teary eyes and, yes, sneezing, away: Shower before you sleep. Dr. Monica Kraft, an allergist and immunologist at the Ohio State University, said that for allergy sufferers, “going to sleep with the pollen that has coated the hair, skin and respiratory tract can mean longer exposure to what you are allergic to ― even when you’re no longer outdoors.” She notes that steam from a hot shower not only removes pollen — it also loosens mucus, thereby lessening your symptoms. Other experts suggest showering and changing clothes as soon as you get indoors, to reduce pollen on the skin, and the amount brought into the home. (Thanks. My nose has been running so much this week that it needs new shoes!)
-NYPost
BS CHRONOMETER 06.21.24
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Take Your Dog to Work Day”, the one day each year that remote workers wish they had an office. This occasion is to celebrate companion dogs and to encourage adoptions. Some workplaces have even adopted office pets. (Why not? He could sleep all day, and still not be the least-productive one there…) [***See “Potential Problems With Taking Your Dog to Work”, below***]: LINK: http://takeyourdog.com
• “Go Skateboarding Day”, an unofficial annual holiday conceived by the International Association of Skateboard Companies, to promote boarding. (BYOBandaids)
• “International Day of Yoga”, first declared by the UN in 2015 to recognize the importance of yoga as a physical, mental, and/or spiritual practice. (And to some, a great spectator sport!)
• “Peaches & Cream Day”. Not the complexion nor the corn variety, but the real deal. You won’t find a better Summer treat than fresh-sliced peaches covered with real cream.
• “Selfie Day”, encouraging the world to take selfies and post them online. (Is it Kim Kardashian’s birthday or something?)
• “World Handshake Day”, the goal is “the global connection of all people and the symbolic transfer of love, gratitude, and positive energy to mother earth and all its living beings.” (My goal is to get through this without everyone knowing how sweaty my palms are…)
• World Giraffe Day”. The world’s tallest animal is celebrated today, on what’s usually the longest day or night (depending on the hemisphere) of the year. World Giraffe Day also raises support, creates awareness, and sheds light on the challenges that wild giraffes face.
• “Atheist Solidarity Day”, a day of awareness, when atheists are encouraged to be open about their lack of belief in God and not fear harmful consequences.
• “Flip Flop Day”. Flip flops go back further than you may think. They were depicted on ancient Egyptian murals around 4,000 B.C. However, there is evidence that they were worn up to 15,000 years ago, during the Stone Age. (And political “flip-flops” go back even further than that…)
• “World Music Day”, honoring amateur and professional musicians alike. The primary aim is to provide free music to everyone, and to encourage amateur musicians to showcase their work to the world. (Unless they play the accordion…)
SATURDAY:
• “Stupid Guy Thing Day”. Women are always saying, “Oh that’s just another stupid guy thing…”, so here’s the day to commemorate it! Women are encouraged to make a list of ‘Stupid Guy Things’ and pass it on. To get you started . . .
✓ Pounding things.
✓ Squirting things.
✓ Watching TV sports.
✓ Using power tools.
✓ Driving giant pickup trucks.
✓ Wearing ball caps … backwards.
✓ Burning and/or exploding things.
✓ Eating anything and everything.
✓ The Three Stooges (What else have you got?)
• “World Rainforest Day”, to help protect rainforests by raising awareness and encouraging action. Rainforests absorb carbon dioxide from human activity, produce oxygen, provide fresh water, provide a home for half of the world’s animal and plant species, are the source of medicines, and stabilize climate patterns.
• “Chocolate Éclair Day”, saluting the light, crisp pastry that’s filled with a custard or cream and topped with icing. The éclair originated in 19th century France, and the word means “flash of lightning”. It was named this because it is eaten so quickly (in a flash).
• “Onion Rings Day”, for those of us who like our holidays deep-fried.
• “Global Smurfs Day”, celebrated on the Sat. closest to the June 25 birthday of the Smurfs’ creator Peyo (Pierre Culliford). He died in 1992, having lived long enough to see his creation achieve massive success.
• “National HVAC Tech Day”, dedicated to all heating, ventilation, and air conditioning (HVAC) technicians. Why? They restore comfort to their customers, often working at all hours, and sometimes in extreme conditions. (And what a drag it must be when, after hours of fiddling with someone’s A/C on a sweltering day, you finally get it working, then off you go — to the next overheated home…)
SUNDAY:
• “Let It Go Day”, a day to release pent-up emotions. Whatever is bugging you, let it go! (Aaaaad now you’ll be singing that song all day! You’re welcome…)
• “International Widows Day”, a UN-sanctioned day of action to address the poverty and injustice faced by millions of widows and their dependents in many countries.
• “Typewriting Day”, a celebration of the anniversary of the granting of a patent to American Christopher Sholes in 1868. So, take your old typewriter from the attic, dust it off, and get started on your magnum opus! (Would his first model be called a “proto-typewriter”?)
• “National Pink Day”, not to be confused with “International Day of Pink” (against bullying and discrimination) in April. For some unknown reason, this is just a day to dress in pink, from your lipstick to your toenail polish. (So, let’s get this party started….!)
• “Pink Flamingo Day”, saluting the tacky lawn ornament created by Don Featherstone in 1957. FAST FACT: Worldwide, there are more fake flamingos than real ones.
• “UN Public Service Day”, celebrating “the value and virtue of public service to the community”, and to recognize the work of public servants, and encourage youth to pursue careers in the public sector.
• “Runners Selfie Day”, a day to celebrate your run with a pic, and post it with #runnersselfie.
• “Pecan Sandies Day, a tribute to those fabulous shortbread cookies that are rich with both butter and toasted nuts. Perfect with iced tea or milk or coffee, they really require no embellishment.
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1944 [80] Ray Davies, London England, rock singer-guitarist (The Kinks-‘Lola’, ‘You Really Got Me’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, 1990
1950 [74] Joey Kramer, NYC, rock drummer (Aerosmith-‘I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing’, ‘Dream On’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, 2001
1951 [73] Nils Lofgren, Chicago IL, rock guitarist (Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band, Neil Young & Crazy Horse)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (with the E Street Band), 2014
1973 [51] Juliette Lewis, Los Angeles CA, movie actress (‘Audrey’ in “Christmas Vacation”, “Natural Born Killers”, “What’s Eating Gilbert Grape”)/TV actress (“Yellowjackets” since 2021)
1979 [45] Chris Pratt, Virginia MN, movie actor (“Jurassic World” films, “Guardians of the Galaxy” films)/TV actor (“Parks & Recreation” 2009-15) COMING UP… “The Electric State” 2024
1981 [43] Brandon Flowers, Henderson NV, rock singer-keyboardist (The Killers-‘Somebody Told Me’, ‘Mr. Brightside’)
1982 [42] Prince William (William Arthur Philip Louis Windsor), London England, British royal (Duke of Cambridge)/eldest son of Prince Charles & the late Princess Diana/married to Kate Middleton (Duchess of Cambridge) since 2011/first in line to the British throne
1982 [42] Jussie Smollett, Santa Rosa CA, TV actor (‘Jamal’ on “Empire” 2015-19)/convicted of 5 counts of disorderly conduct for staging a fake hate crime against himself, and making false police reports. Currently released on bond while his case is on appeal.
1985 [39] Lana Del Rey (Elizabeth Grant), NYC, pop singer-songwriter (w/Ariana Grande & Miley Cyrus-‘Don’t Call Me Angel’, ‘Summertime Sadness’)
1996 [28] Scottie Scheffler, Ridgewood NJ, pro golfer (US Masters winner 2022, ‘24, Players Championship, 2023, ‘24)/ranked #1 since 2022
SATURDAY- Kris Kristofferson (“A Star is Born”) is 88; Todd Rundgren (‘Bang the Drum All Day’) is 76; Meryl Streep (“Sophie’s Choice”) is 75; Graham Greene (“Dances with Wolves”) is 72; Cyndi Lauper (‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’) is 71; Dan Brown (“The Da Vinci Code”) is 60; Amy Brenneman (“The Leftovers”) is 60; Steven Page (Barenaked Ladies) is 54; Carson Daly (“The Voice”) is 51; Dinah Jane Hansen (Fifth Harmony) is 27
SUNDAY- Randy Jackson (“American Idol”) is 68; Frances McDormand (“Fargo”) is 67; Selma Blair (“Cruel Intentions”) is 52; Joel Edgerton (“Revenge of the Sith”) is 50; Jason Mraz (‘I’m Yours’) is 47; Melissa Rauch (“The Big Bang Theory”) is 44; Duffy (‘Warwick Avenue’) is 40
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2003 [21] “Harry Potter & The Order of the Phoenix” (the 5th book in the series) is published, and grosses more in one day than the heavily-hyped movie opening of “Hulk”, an unprecedented feat in publishing
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2015 [09] As Apple Music readies its launch, it reverses policy, agreeing to pay artists for music streamed during trial periods, a day after Taylor Swift threatens to remove her latest album “1989″ from the service
2020 [04] Kurt Cobain’s guitar used during Nirvana’s “MTV Unplugged” show sells for a record $6 million
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2004 [20] The “SpaceShipOne” rocket punches through Earth’s atmosphere, then returns to glide to a landing on California’s Mojave Desert, in the first privately-financed manned spaceflight
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2015 [09] Golfer Jordan Spieth wins the US Open golf championship at age 21, making him the youngest to win since Bobby Jones, over 90 years earlier
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ The first stroller, invented in 1733, was engineered to be pulled by a goat.
✓ Electronic dance music has been shown to ward off mosquitos.
✓ Sharks are the only fish that can blink with both eyes.
✓ China has only one time zone.
✓ The original recipe for chocolate contained chili powder instead of sugar.
✓ Humans are scientifically proven to be happier in the summer.
-Vitalchek, Parade
Best of BS . . .
BS SIGNS SUMMER HAS ARRIVED:
• Idiots switch from asking “Cold enough for ya?” to “Hot enough for ya?”.
• Your friends with the pool have stopped answering texts.
• Bags of turtlenecks being dropped off at the Goodwill.
• Best tee-time available: 9pm – a week from Tuesday.
• You never see any teenagers before noon.
• Walmart and Target have put out their Halloween decorations.
• Just a couple weeks till hockey training camps begin.
-First published in BS in 2004
(It’s “Take Your Dog to Work Day”)
BS POTENTIAL PROBLEMS WITH TAKING YOUR DOG TO WORK:
[***Preview for content***]
• He thinks every day is ‘Hump Day’.
• Just one more obnoxious individual slobbering over the cute receptionist.
• Constant assembly line shutdowns at your job in the hydrant factory.
• Spends all day chasing tail, just like the slimy guys in sales.
• Total confusion when your Doberman finds out the employee washroom has 8 ‘drinking bowls’.
• The sight of your Chihuahua wearing scrubs in the Operating Room keeps your patient in stitches.
• It just adds another to the long list of those barking orders at you.
• At the end of the day, your future has a lot in common with the boss’ left leg.
-First published in BS in 2000
BS WEB GOODIES:
Summer goals (sound up): https://tinyurl.com/2s43jn8m
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I’d enjoy summer a lot more if someone came by every hour and misted me, like produce!
BS PHONE STARTERS:
• What’s on your “summer bucket list”?
• What tastes really, really good at 2am?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: Stats show that 40% of us have a spare one of THESE in the car. What is it?
Answer: Pair of pants
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.
