Tuesday, September 12, 2006        Edition: #3363
Deja Moo! 

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY after 5 months in hiding, Suri Cruise finally makes her official photo debut on the cover of the OCTOBER issue of “Vanity Fair” (in a dumb move by the magazine, it was pre-released so by now virtually everyone has seen it) . . . TONIGHT is the debut of the 3rd season of “Dancing With the Stars” (ABC/CTV), with wannabe celeb hoofers that include country singer Sara Evans, movie actress Vivica A Fox, trash-talk TV host Jerry Springer, MSNBC news anchor Tucker Carlson, and NFL great Emmitt Smith (you know your career is in remission when …) . . . Liza Minnelli’s estranged husband David Gest is asking that a court set aside his prenuptial agreement with her, claiming she hid from him the fact that she was an alcoholic, prone to violence, and – ouch! –  infected with herpes (hey, at least she treats gays as equal-opportunity spouses, Davy!) . . . Sean Combs has agreed to pay $200,000 and stop using the name ‘Diddy’ in the UK in an out-of-court settlement with British DJ/producer Richard ‘Diddy’ Dearlove who’s been using the name for 10 years (now how can we get him to drop the dumb moniker here?) . . . Daniel Smith, the 20-year-old son of 38-year-old Anna Nicole Smith has reportedly died in her hospital room in the Bahamas where she just gave birth to a baby girl a few days ago (so far, no known cause but it doesn’t seem to involve drugs or suicide) . . . Jessica Simpson is said to be feuding with her controlling manager/father Joe Simpson over her choice in boyfriends, most recently actors Dane Cooke (“Employee of the Month”), Jared Leto (“Alexander”), and singer John Mayer (let’s set her up – who do you think she should date?) . . . And at least one trashy tabloid is reporting that Kevin Federline has walked out on wife Britney Spears just days before she’s due to give birth to their 2nd child, reportedly because he’s so wrapped up in his ‘career’ (man, you’re gonna be sorry when that’s over… next week).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Black Eyed Peas – Fergie tells “Time” magazine that she once struggled with crystal meth addiction. Quote: “It was the hardest boyfriend I ever had to break up with.”
• Bob Seger – TODAY he releases “Face The Promise”, his 1st studio album in 11 years. The album’s first single “Wait for Me” was the first-ever Seger song available online.
• Lionel Richie – TONIGHT he’s on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC) to flog his new album “Coming Home”.
• John Mayer – TONIGHT he guests on “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” (NBC) to promote his just-released album “Continuum”.
• The Rolling Stones – Mick Jagger is using a Teleprompter that’s hidden in his on-stage monitor to scroll through Stones’ lyrics in time with his delivery. You know you’re a 63-year-old rocker when …
• Toby Keith – TODAY he’s on “Live With Regis & Kelly (syndicated/CTV)
• Also in music stores TODAY: “Between the Covers” a compilation of famous remakes such as Lenny Kravitz’s “American Woman”, U2’s “Everlasting Love”, Dixie Chicks’ “Landslide” and Sheryl Crow’s “The First Cut Is the Deepest”, with proceeds to benefit AIDS research; Justin Timberlake’s 2nd solo album, “FutureSex/LoveSounds”; Shawn Colvin’s “These Four Walls”; TV on the Radio’s “Return to Cookie Mountain”; The Black Keys’ “Magic Potion”; and Basement Jaxx’s “Crazy Itch Radio”.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Bottoms Up” ( Comedy ): Jason Mewes (“Clerks 1 & 2”) stars as a Midwest bartender who moves to Hollywood and attempts to ingratiate himself with the local party set. Paris Hilton co-stars in this lame straight-to-DVD effort. Word has it Ms Hilton was always late on the movie set, and when she did finally showed up it was usually on the way home from a party. And to further impress the cast and crew … she never bothered ro learn her lines.
• “Lucky Number Slevin” ( Crime Thriller ): A case of mistaken identity lands ‘Slevin’ (Josh Hartnett) in the middle of a war between NYC crime bosses ‘The Rabbi’ (Ben Kingsley) and ‘The Boss’ (Morgan Freeman). Co-stars Bruce Willis, Lucy Liu & Stanley Tucci. Partially shot in Montréal.
• “Star Wars” ( Sci-Fi Adventure Reissue ) – New 2-disc versions of the original trilogy: the re-titled “Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope” (including both 1977 and digitally-restored 2004 versions); “Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back” (1980/2004); and “Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi” (1983/2004). While there won’t be any more “Star Wars” films, there are plans to develop some 100 new episodes of “Star Wars” for TV.
• “The Wild” ( Disney Animated Adventure): A group of NYC zoo animals embark on a dangerous mission to rescue one of their own who is mistakenly shipped to the wilds of Africa. Features the voices of Kiefer Sutherland, James Belushi & William Shatner. The biggest animated movie ever produced in Canada, with over 400 animators housed in a large building to work on it.
• Also on DVD TODAY: “Grey’s Anatomy: Season 2”; “The Office: Season 2”; and “Smallville: The Complete 5th Season”.

ARMLESS BANDIT:
In an effort to win back customers, a Japanese bank has added the chance to win some cash whenever you withdraw money from an ATM. After each transaction, a roulette wheel pops up on the screen and gives you one chance to spin yourself an extra 1,000 yen, a little under $10. (If the wheel stops on ‘red’, they put your account into default, then charge you a 20-buck fee to reactivate it.)
– Reuters

JANIE’S GOT A GUN … AND ALMOST EVERYONE ELSE, TOO:
New stats show that, counting small arms, there is 1 weapon for every 10 people worldwide. Each year, somewhere between 10-to-14 billion units of ammunition are manufactured, enough to kill every person in the world … twice. (Thank goodness we have responsible people running things so that would never … oh oh.)
– “New York Times”

YOUR ARCHAIC iPOD NO LONGER WORTH SQUAT:
TODAY Apple CEO Steve Jobs is expected to announce that Apple’s iTunes Music Store will begin selling a movie download service, allowing users to pay $9.99 for a movie that can be viewed on a new wider-screen iPod or, via a new wireless streaming device called ‘AirPort Express’, on a regular TV. But several websites suggest that Apple is still testing the products and it may be several weeks or even months before they are ready to hit the market. (Just one more way that initial $79 iPod investment has blossomed into your need to get a second job.)
– “Wired”

MANTALK:
Linguists have noticed that men are more openly embracing traditionally feminine things of late and, because of that, new male-oriented words are being coined. For instance …
• ‘Manny’ (nanny)
• ‘Murse’ (male nurse)
• ‘Mandals’ (sandals)
• ‘Man Crush’ (hero worship)
• ‘Manscaping’ (trimming, waxing or brushing the body hair)
• ‘Manstress’ (a woman’s guy-on-the-side)
• ‘Mansy’ (a guy who’s not a complete wimp, but he does have his moments)
• ‘Manties’ (very brief, tight-fitting men’s underpants)
– “Los Angeles Times”

AND MY SHOES DO NOT EXPLODE:
Inspired by a passenger at JFK airport in NYC who was forced to either take off a T-shirt with Arabic writing on it or miss his flight, artist Tim Murtaugh has created a tee which says ‘I Am Not a Terrorist’ in Arabic. Why? Murtaugh says too many freedoms have already been given away in the name of the war on terrorism, and freedom of speech should not be one of them. (In the name of free speech, the Department of Homeland Security will issue him a card saying: ‘You’re gonna wait in line until you mold’ …  in Arabic.)
NET: http://itsnotallbad.com/iamnotaterrorist/
– “Curious Times”

CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE POLL:
A poll by University of Illinois researchers finds that men and women differ on what they consider ‘comfort foods’. Women prefer chocolate and cookies while men pick soup, pizza and pasta. (We took an impromptu poll here in the studio and the favorite comfort food is – beer.)
– “Redbook”

FANTASY FACE-TIME:
Author Michael Henby has written a new book entitled “Fantasy Kick”, a guide to furthering your career through – fantasy football. Howzat? Henby says employees can use the game to  network in the workplace. Fantasy football, he claims, allows you to interact with a variety people from different departments … even the boss. He calls it the new version of golf. (Except it’s hard to get Friday afternoon off to check your picks.)
– “USA Today”

TALLER TALE:
Fitness manager Antoni Akagi at Equinox Fitness in NYC claims he can make people taller. He doesn’t use leg extensions or growth hormones, just helps you look taller by using exercises to straighten your posture and reverse the effects of office work. Many of us now work hours on computers, bent over with one hand on the mouse. That causes the chest to get tighter which pulls the shoulders forward which causes a hunch. The secret to reversing that? You strengthen the upper back to open the chest and allow the shoulders to retract. But don’t expect to see results overnight. Akagi says exercise programs can take anywhere from 6-to-12 weeks before results are noticeable. (Never mind then … where’d I put those lifts?)
– “Forbes”

BS AMAZING FACT:
University of Missouri psychologist Harris Cooper finds that children typically forget between 1-to-3 months’ worth of schooling during the summer. Math and spelling skills suffer the most, while reading is least affected by the break.
– “Psychology Today”

THE BULL SHEET 09.12.06

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1931 [75] George Jones (aka ‘Possum’), Saratoga TX, country legend (“He Stopped Lovin’ Her Today”) with over 150 charted singles during 50-year career/Country Music Hall of Fame (1992)

1952 [54] Neil Peart, Hamilton ON, classic rock drummer (Rush-“Vapor Trails”)

1966 [40] Ben Folds, Winston-Salem NC, pop singer (“Annie Waits”, Ben Folds Five-“Brick”)

1973 [33] Paul Walker, Glendale CA, movie actor (“The Fast & the Furious”)

1974 [32] Jennifer Nettles, Douglas GA, country singer (Sugarland-“Want To”, w/Bon Jovi-“Who Says You Can’t Go Home”)

1978 [28] Ruben Studdard, Birmingham AL, “American Idol 2” winner (“Superstar”)  FACTOID: His new album “The Return” is in stores SEPTEMBER 26th.

1978 [28] Benjamin McKenzie, Austin TX, TV actor (‘Ryan Atwood’ on “The OC” since 2003)

1980 [26] Yao Ming, Shanghai, China, NBA’s tallest basketball player at  7 ft-6 in (Houston Rockets since 2002)/4-time NBA All-Star

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Chocolate Milkshake Day”. Kelis’ is better than yours.

• “International Housekeepers Week”, honoring the efforts of all household staff. So be sure to give your servants an extra day off.

• “International Video Games Day”, a day for kids who love ’em to celebrate and thank the parents who fork out the cash for an X-Box or PlayStation.

• “Respect for the Aged Day” in Japan, where the number of people living past the age of 100 is increasing dramatically. The current number of Japanese centenarians has climbed to about 20,000. 35 years back there were just over 150.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1983 [23] Arnold Schwarzenegger becomes a US citizen, 14 years after emigrating from Austria

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2003 [03] Music icon Johnny Cash dies at age 71 of heart failure at Nashville’s Baptist Hospital, stemming from complications from diabetes

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1994 [12] Mosaic Communications introduces ‘Netscape’, the 1st Internet browser (Mosaic’s ‘Firefox’ is now the state-of-the-art)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1983 [23] Albert Rizzo of Malta sets ‘World Treading Water Record’ at 108 hours, 9 minutes in
the ocean (that’s 4.5 days!)

COMING UP . . .
[Wed] “Rock Star: Supernova” finalé (CBS/Global)
[Wed] Peanut Day
[Wed] Positive Thinking Day
[Wed] Computer Programmers Day
[Thurs] “Survivor: Cook Islands” debuts (CBS/Global)
[Thurs] International Cross-Culture Day
[Thurs] Pregnant Women’s Day
[Fri] POW/MIA Recognition Day
[Fri] “Everyone’s Hero”; “Gridiron Gang”; “The Black Dahlia”; and “The Last Kiss” open in movie theaters
[Sun] “Canadian Idol” season finalé (CTV)
[Sun] “The Amazing Race 10” debuts (CBS/CTV)
This Week Is … Habitat for Humanity Week
This Month Is … Organic Harvest Month

BULL’S BITS

BS ‘COLLEGE STUDENT’S DICTIONARY’:
• ‘Alcohol’: The key to surviving college.
• ‘Class: What you’re supposed to get up and go to after a Thursday night party.
• ‘Dancing’: A favorite pastime of almost every drunk, usually looks pathetic.
• ‘Emergency’: The keg is empty!
• ‘Games’: Anything that involves cards, dice and chugging beers.
• ‘Kissing’: What you’ll do to anything that moves after 15 beers.
• ‘Underage’: Most of the drinking population in college town.
• ‘X-Ray’: How they can see into your stomach before they pump it.

BS ‘FOUR PLAY’:
Ask listeners to call in ‘Four-Word Phrases That Mean Trouble’. A couple of primers …
• “Who’s your insurance agent?”
• “Here comes the cops!”
• “My parents are home!”
• “The test was positive.”
• “Paris is gonna drive.”

BS RANDOM JOKE:
It’s true, money talks! Mine just said goodbye.

BS PHONE STARTER:
What are the 3 necessary ingredients to a good marriage?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: If you look at the average man’s, you likely won’t see any of THESE. But if you look at the average woman’s, you’re likely to see 4.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Decorative items on their key chains.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows.