Thursday, September 20, 2007        Edition: #3617
Sheet, Featuring Bull

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Pregnant Nicole Richie has temporarily gotten rid of her pet cat because the smell makes her feel sick (the poor puss also had to survive a 10-story fall from Richie’s apartment LAST YEAR) . . . You’d think things couldn’t get any worse, but now “High School Musical” star Vanessa Hudgens is now being sued for alleged unpaid legal fees (maybe she could pay off her debt in pictures?) . . . In a new PETA ad, Alicia Silverstone appears in the buff to inform us how going veggie has been ‘amazing for her bod’ (it’s apparently done nothing brain-wise however)  . . . Whoopi Goldberg has revealed that there’s a profanity clause in her contract with “The View” (ABC/CTV) even though she’s never, ever sworn on broadcast TV or radio (not one F-ing time!) . . . Former “Sopranos” star Aida Turturro (‘Tony’s sister ‘Janice’) is set to take over the role of ‘Mama Morton’ in the hit musical “Chicago” on Broadway (the role played by Queen Latifah in the 2002 movie version) . . . Matthew McConaughey is stepping into the movie “Tropic Thunder”, taking over the role left vacant by Owen Wilson following his suicide attempt and subsequent hospitalization (it’s basically just a cameo, so Matt gets a free trip to Hawaii for doing nada) . . . Movie actor Wesley Snipes has been ordered to pay $1.7 million in unpaid commissions to United Talent Agency for helping him land several film roles (a judge decided Snipes should pick up the tab because – he never bothered to respond to the lawsuit) . . . And it’s official: Kanye West has beaten 50 Cent in 1st-week album sales, moving 957,000 copies of “Graduation” in comparison to Fiddy’s 691,000 copies of “Curtis”, meaning 50 must now face up to his promise of retiring if that happened (with his bankroll, he woulda been smart to spend 3 or 4 million buying up copies to jack his numbers & save face).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Celine Dion – She refuses to set foot on red carpets because she hates answering superficial questions about the clothes she’s wearing. That may be because she was savaged for wearing a white Dior suit to the 1999 Oscars … backwards.
• Drowning Pool – US soldiers overseas have told them they use their song “Bodies” to get pumped up for combat missions. The band has initiated an online petition asking for better support of returning troops through mental health programs.
• Lily Allen – She’s been banned from borrowing clothes from top fashion houses because … she ruins them! She admits she’s often left designers fuming after returning their creations in tatters.
• Pussycat Dolls – Nicole Scherzinger‘s backstage rider includes 20 black hand towels, multi-grain oatmeal, a cheese tray, protein shakes … and a jar of dill pickles.
• Sex Pistols – 30 years after the release of their only studio album, the punk pioneers are the latest band to announce a reunion. The surviving members will perform a one-off gig in London NOVEMBER 8th.
• Van Halen – Anthrax’s Scott Ian, Rage Against the Machine’s Tom Morello & Metallica’s Kirk Hammett are among those who have dropped by to watch the re-formed band rehearse at the Los Angeles Forum and their reviews have all been glowing. Eddie Van Halen & his bandmates kick off the long-awaited reunion tour SEPTEMBER 27th in Charlotte NC.
• White Stripes — They’re now taking the rest of the year off due to Meg White’s acute anxiety. All remaining concert dates for 2007 are cancelled, including a tour of Britain.

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• Brown Brigade – The reggae-influenced heavy metal band created by ex-Sum 41 guitarist Dave ‘Brownsound’ Baksh is on “MTV Live” (MTV Canada).
• Cold War Kids – The Fullerton CA indie rockers (“Hang Me Up to Dry”) perform on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC).
• KT Tunstall – The Scots singer/songwriter flogs her new album “Drastic Fantastic” on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC).
• Mariah Carey – TONIGHT’s “VH1 Save the Music Foundation 10th Anniversary Gala” at NYC’s Lincoln Center for the Performing Arts will honor her contribution to the cause of bringing music into public schools. Jon Bon Jovi will also attend & perform.
• Reba McEntire – TODAY she guests on both “Good Morning America” (ABC) and “The View” (ABC/CTV).
• “Survivor China” (CBS/Global) – Another group of castaways vies to outlast the rest and eventually win a million in the season premiere, this time in the south-central Chinese province of Jiang Xi. Remember when regular folk used to audition for this show? In this 15th season, it’s more likely contestants were found through modeling agencies or actually ‘cast’ for the various team-playing roles that have become familiar, i.e.: professional poker player Jean-Robert Belande and WWE wrestling femme fatale Ashley Massaro.

FUTURE FLICKS:
A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “Elizabeth: The Golden Age” – Actress Cate Blanchett, who reprises her role as British monarch Elizabeth I in this sequel, was reluctant to bare her butt for one revealing scene.  So director Shekpar Kapur confesses he was forced to call in a less coy ‘derriere double’ to shoot the scene. We’ll find out why we actually need to see the royal buns when the film debuts on OCTOBER 12th.
• “Friday the 13th” – Strap on your hockey masks one more time, ‘Voorhees’ disciples, ’cause there’s at least one more “F-13” in the works. Writers are reportedly currently preparing a script for a shoot scheduled sometime in early 2008. Almost creepily, this will be the 13th film in the genre. It’s scheduled for release in 2009, on a Friday the 13th no doubt … meaning it would have to be February, March, or November.
• “Paddington” – The little storybook bear who emigrated to London from Peru and became a children’s favorite for generations is coming to the bigscreen. The film, which will combine live action and CGI animation is being produced by David Heyman of the “Harry Potter” film series. Casting details and release dates for the movie have yet to be announced.
• “Star Trek” – Casting for the 11th film in the series, a prequel with the simple original title, is coming together quickly. Actress Zoe Saldana (“Pirates of the Caribbean”, “Drumline”) is in final negotiations for the role of chief communications officer ‘Lieutenant Uhura’, originally played by Nichelle Nichols. Actor Zachary Quinto (“Heores”) will play the young ‘Spock’ while the original ‘Spock’, Leonard Nimoy, will have a cameo. Anton Yelchin (“Huff“) will play Russian navigator ‘Pavel Chekov’, following in the footsteps of Walter Koenig. The movie is due on Christmas Day, 2008.
NET: http://www.startrek.com/startrek/view/series/MOV/011/index.html

BRIGHT-EYED & BUSHY-TAILED:
A new psychology study at the University of Missouri-Columbia recommends early FRIDAY classes – before 10 am – to help reduce excessive drinking by college students on ‘thirsty Thursday’ nights. According to the study, about two-thirds of students who drink on Thursdays consume ‘binge amounts’ if they have late Friday classes or none at all. (And you think they’re gonna show up for an 8 am Friday class?)
– AP

BS LAW & DISORDER:
• In Britain, a manhunt is underway for a guy who held up a store and stole more than $1,000  using … his girlfriend’s vibrator as a ‘weapon’. (“Gimme all your cash or I’ll make the Earth move.”)
• In Ukraine, a 48-year-old man has been arrested for making use of one of the exhibits at a museum dedicated to … the history of the toilet. He’s since apologized, admitting he didn’t realize they were only to look at. (The man who apparently takes everything literally has now been banned from the Corkscrew Museum in Provence, France.)
• In Italy, a sweet-toothed gang of burglars has been caught after – literally – stealing candy from a baby. The perps grabbed a handful of lollipops during a home invasion, then later dumped them half-eaten nearby. Police in Alessandria managed to identify the 7-member Romanian gang after matching up DNA evidence contained in the residue saliva. (Wasn’t this on “CSI” last season?)

WHAT ABOUT WILD DOGS?
An Australian study has found that walking dogs in natural areas dramatically affects birdlife. University of New South Wales ecologist Peter Banks, a specialist in prey & predator behavior, says dog walking and conservation areas just don’t mix. According to his studies, the presence of pooches in woodlands leads to a more than 40% drop in the number of birds and a 35% reduction in the diversity of species. It’s the first study to examine the ecological impact of dog walking on wildlife. (In the interest of equal time, let’s now talk about the impact of birds on windshields.)
– “The Australian”

BEATS THE HECK OUT OF TUNA BREATH:
Worried your cat doesn’t like you any more? A recent study finds that it could be your toothpaste that’s to blame! Researchers say some cats hate the smell of minty toothpaste and will hiss, growl at you, or run away whenever they smell it on your breath. Whereas humans like the minty-fresh aroma of clean teeth, cats apparently find it a turn-off. (Like I want the cat’s nose in my mouth anyway.)
– “Science”

YOUR CHEATIN’ STOMACH:
What foods do we turn to most when we want to cheat on our diets? According to a recent survey, these are the top tempters …
5. Ice Cream
4. Corn Chips
3. Cheese
2. Butter
1. Chocolate
Others making the top 10 include potato chips, half-and -half cream, pizza, and Oreo cookies. (Feeling hungry, anyone?)
– “Redbook”

BS AMAZING FACT:
According to researchers, lovers imagine a split-up will be much worse than it actually is. The reason? People anticipate only the distress associated with a breakup, not the good outcomes, such as meeting new people. (And showing up single at weddings and parties … and bedtime.)
– “Focus”

BS CHRONOMETER 09.20.07

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1934 [73] Sophia Loren (Scicolone), Rome, Italy, movie star (1962 Academy Award-“Two Women”, 1991 Honorary Career Achievement Oscar)  UP NEXT: Has a role in the big-budget musical, “Nine”, coming in 2008.

1956 [51] Gary Cole, Park Ridge IL, TV actor (‘Dr Possible’ on “Kim Possible” since 2002)

1979 [28] Rick Woolstenhulme, Gilbert AZ, rock drummer (Lifehouse-“First Time”, “Hanging By a Moment”)

BS REASON TO PARTY . . .
• “International Student Day”, honoring the ‘diligence & hard work’ of students everywhere (snort!). And so we offer the following public service to the dedicated students of the world –
YOU KNOW YOU’RE NOT GOING TO GRADUATE THIS YEAR IF …
• Your guidance counselor gives you a list of career choices … on a matchbook.
• Grandma starts affectionately calling you ‘Li’l Flunky’.
• You miss a lot of classes to appear in police lineups.
• Your rebuttal in the first round of the debate tournament is “You’ve convinced me!”.
• They’re giving you an ‘incomplete’ in shop until you find the teacher’s favorite thumb.
• Instead of a cap & gown, they’re fitting you for a McDonald’s hairnet.
• It’s nearly October and you still haven’t found your home room.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1946 [61] “Cannes Film Festival” debuts on the French Riviera (world’s top-ranked, ahead of Toronto)

1984 [23] “The Cosby Show” debuts (NBC) and goes on to become TV’s top show for the next 8 seasons

2006 [01] A memorial for late “Crocodile Hunter” Steve Irwin is held at the Australia Zoo in Brisbane (3,000 tickets are snapped up in 15 minutes)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2005 [02] JD Fortune is named the new lead singer for INXS on “Rock Star: INXS” (CBS), likely in part due to his penning of their subsequent hit, “Pretty Vegas”

2006 [01] The Rolling Stones “Bigger Bang” tour returns to North America with a show at the New England Patriots’ Gillette Stadium (tour kicked off at Boston’s Fenway Park August 21, 2005)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1917 [90] 1st Canadian income tax begins as ‘temporary war measure’ (um, is the war over yet?)

1921 [86] 1st ‘Radio Newscast’ airs (KDKA Pittsburgh PA)

1998 [09] In a surgical 1st, doctors in Lyon, France sew a donor’s hand onto a man whose own had been amputated in an accident 14 years previously (“Mon dieu, I can clap again!”)

COMING UP . . .
[Fri] Miniature Golf Day
[Fri] World Gratitude Day
[Fri] “Good Luck Chuck”; “Into the Wild”; “Resident Evil: Extinction”; “Sydney White” open in movie theaters
[Sat] Hunting & Fishing Day
[Sat] Hobbit Day
[Sat] Elephant Appreciation Day
[Sat] Centenarians Day
[Sun] Autumn arrives (5:51 am EDT)
[Mon] Polaris Music Prize (Toronto)
This Week Is … Balance Awareness Week
This Month Is … Self-Awareness Month

BULL’S BITS

BS DILEMMAS:
• At the local grocer, you see an elderly woman shoplift bacon. Do you tell the grocer?
• It’s late and your 18-year-old asks permission for his/her steady to spend the night in his/her room. Do you permit it?
• You’re awarded a major contract that requires you to be out-of-town when your wife is due to give birth. Do you turn down the contract?
• A friend gets drunk and confides that a month ago he injured a cyclist and didn’t stop. Do you report your friend?
• You want a job that requires experience you don’t have. Do you lie on you résumé?

BS WEB GOODIE:
Fashion designer Marc Ecko spent $750,000 on baseball slugger Barry Bonds’ record-breaking 756th career home run  ball and is now allowing fans to decide what to do with it in an online vote. The odd options are: ‘Bestow It’ (give it to the Hall of Fame); ‘Brand It’ (give it to the Hall of Fame branded with an asterisk); or ‘Banish It’ (blast it into space).
NET: http://www.vote756.com/marcecko/

BS RANDOM JOKE:
How is it we need a license to fish, but any old schmuck can have a baby?

BS QUICK-PICK TRIVIA:
Q: This schoolyard game was originally a training exercise for Roman soldiers. Was it …  Hopscotch, Red Rover, or Tag?
A: Hopscotch began in Roman Britain. The original hopscotch courts were over 100 feet long and used for military training. Roman foot soldiers ran the course in full armor and field packs as it was thought that hopscotch would improve their footwork. Children imitated the soldiers by drawing their own board and creating a scoring system.]
– StreetPlay.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
What are the things you miss most about no longer being single?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: 13% of us do THIS every day, but 9% of us NEVER do it.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Weigh ourselves.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
All you need is love … but a little wine doesn’t hurt!