Friday, September 20, 2019 Edition: #6535
Another Sheetload of Bull!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Netflix has announced that “El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie” will play in a limited number of theaters from Oct. 11 to Oct. 13. The film will also begin streaming on Netflix at midnight PT on Oct. 11, and will later have a run on AMC, which aired the original Emmy-winning series. As you know by now, the movie was filmed in secret and remains shrouded in mystery. What we do know is this: It follows meth-maker Jesse Pinkman after he escapes from Neo-Nazi captivity.
-Yahoo
★ Alec Baldwin and his wife are expecting baby #5! Hilaria Baldwin revealed she’s expecting, just five months after experiencing a miscarriage. Announcing the news on social media Wednesday, she said it’s “still very early,” but they wanted to share the pregnancy with those who supported her over the last several months.
-TheBlast
★ While a remake of “The Princess Bride” hasn’t actually been announced, any plans for one are already sparking serious backlash. Stars and public figures like Jamie Lee Curtis, Mia Farrow, Ted Cruz and even the star of the 1987 classic “The Princess Bride” Cary Elwes formed their own Brute Squad in opposition to the idea after rumors started circulating about a remake. In a reference to one of his famous lines in the film, Elwes, who plays ‘Westley’ tweeted: “There’s a shortage of perfect movies in this world. It would be a pity to damage this one.”
-TheWrap
★ Chrissy Teigen was bombarded with FaceTime calls after accidentally sharing her email address on social media. She posted a picture of her laptop on Twitter, without realizing that she was logged into her email account, which her 11.7 million followers could see. Teigen saw the funny side, but has since changed her email address.
-Yahoo
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Chelsea Handler, JD Pardo, Trisha Yearwood
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Paul Giamatti, Chrissy Metz, Sheryl Crow featuring Chris Stapleton
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Kelly Clarkson, Bashir Salahuddin, Diallo Riddle, CJ Hauser, Terri Lyne Carrington (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Josh Gad, Michaela Watkins, Will Ferrell (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Margaret Atwood
• “The Talk” (CBS): Marg Helgenberger, Simone Missick, Dove Cameron
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Sylvester Stallone
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Wanda Sykes, Demi Burnett
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Tracee Ellis Ross, Hayley Kiyoko, Dr. Sandra “Pimple Popper” Lee
SATURDAY-
• “Escaping the NXIVM Cult: A Mother’s Fight to Save Her Daughter” (LIFETIME): A mother will stop at nothing to save her daughter from a dangerous sex cult.
• “Creative Arts Emmy Awards” (FXX): Honoring the outstanding artistic and technical achievements in television, guest performances in weekly series, and work in the animation, reality and documentary
• “When Hope Calls” (HALLMARK): Sisters open an orphanage and face resistance from the townspeople; the community unites when disaster strikes.
SUNDAY-
• “71st Annual Primetime Emmy Awards” (FOX): Fresh off a successful Oscar hosting gig, Absolutely Nobody returns to host the Emmy broadcast.
• “Celebrity Family Feud” (ABC): Celebrity contestants John Legend, Chrissy Teigen, Lisa Vanderpump, Tom Sandoval, Ariana Madix, Tom Schwartz, Katie Maloney-Schwartz, Ryan Lochte and Kevin Eubanks.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Pink – will be presented with the “Legend of Live” award at this year’s Billboard Live Music Summit & Awards, Nov 5-6, in Beverly Hills. She is the first female solo artist to win the award, Billboard’s top honor for touring and live performance.
• Katy Perry – hopes her recent reconciliation with Taylor Swift will help heal the rift between the stars’ fans. In an appearance on “Ellen”, Perry said: “We have such big groups of people that like to follow us and they started turning against each other a little bit too.”
• Britney Spears – Her father Jamie has been cleared of child abuse charges following an alleged altercation with her 13-year-old son Sean. The Ventura County District Attorney’s Office says there is “insufficient proof that a criminal offense was committed.”
• Celine Dion — On Wednesday, she released three new songs and kicked off her “Courage World Tour”. The new songs are ‘Courage’, ‘Lying Down’ and ‘Imperfections’ from her “Courage” album, which comes out November 15.
• David Lee Roth – says he hopes to tour with his new solo band after their Vegas residency. His gig at the House Of Blues at Mandalay Bay kicks off on January 8.
• Rod Stewart — has announced the release of an orchestral album featuring new versions of some of his classic tracks along with a brand-new song, ‘Stop Loving Her Today’. “You’re in My Heart: Rod Stewart With the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra” comes out on Nov. 22.
• Mötley Crüe — Nikki Sixx says the experience of making the group’s biopic “The Dirt” saved the band members’ friendships after they started feeling disconnected during their 2015 farewell tour. They recorded four new songs for the soundtrack, and Sixx says there is at least the possibility of more music to come.
• Chilliwack – is among four legendary Canadian artists who will join the Canadian Music Hall of Fame on Oct. 27. Andy Kim, Bobby Curtola (posthumously) and Cowboy Junkies will also be inducted at Studio Bell, home of the National Music Centre in Calgary, AB.
• Miranda Lambert — has an active presence Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, but says she has mixed feelings about social media. As she put it recently, “People are going to pry anyways, and so I’d rather it be my news than fake news.”
• Luke Bryan — will help the Grand Ole Opry and country fans support the fight against breast cancer on Oct. 22 by flipping the switch that turns the Opry pink. He will also be a part of two shows there that night. Five dollars from tickets for both the 7PM and 9:30PM shows will go to the fight against breast cancer.
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Rambo: Last Blood” (R-Rated, Action/Adventure): Rambo must confront his past and unearth his ruthless combat skills to exact revenge in a final mission. (Sylvester Stallone, Paz Vega)
• “Ad Astra” (PG-13, Mystery/Suspense): Astronaut Roy McBride undertakes a mission across an unforgiving solar system to uncover the truth about his missing father and his doomed expedition that now, 30 years later, threatens the universe. (Brad Pitt, Liv Tyler)
• “Downton Abbey” (PG, Drama): The continuing story of the Crawley family, wealthy owners of a large estate in the English countryside in the early 20th century. (Michelle Dockery, Matthew Goode)
• “Villians” (Comedy/Drama, Limited): When a pair of amateur criminals break into a suburban home, they stumble upon a dark secret and two sadistic homeowners who will do anything to keep it from getting out. (Bill Skarsgård, Maika Monroe)
SLICED PIZZA:
The owner of an Italian restaurant in Portland, OR says we should be cutting our pizza with…scissors. In fact, Cathy Whims, and the staff of “Nostrana” restaurant have been using scissors to cut pizzas since 2005. Whims says it is important that her establishment be as much like a real Italian restaurant as possible, and “in Italy, the pizzas aren’t cut”. As a result, at Nostrana, your pizza arrives at the table in one piece, and the server uses scissors to carve up slices. Not only do guests think the scissor idea is “cute and clever”, but it allows customers to decide the size of their slice. And the idea might be catching on: There are pizza joints in Chicago and New York that use scissor-slicers too.
(Let’s just hope they didn’t borrow them from the Italian barber next door!)
(I’ve cooked some frozen pizzas that you had to cut with garden shears!)
(I went to college and there was only one item in our utensil drawer. This is nothing new to me.)
-HuffingtonPost
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ If you can’t take your coins to the bank, what are you supposed to do with them? That is what Julien Perrotte of Montreal is wondering after a rep at his local bank told him that they wouldn’t accept for deposit the $800 worth of sorted and rolled coins that he had collected over the past year. He called Laurentian Bank’s customer service line to find out more and was told it was a new policy at the bank not to accept coins.
(Yet they have no problem “nickel and diming” their customers!)
➢ Employees at a company based in a “WeWork” shared workspace office were denied entrance for two days earlier this week when they found the glass door blocked shut…by an umbrella. A look inside the sliding door revealed an umbrella that had fallen on the ground and blocked the door in much the same way that a security stick can be used to jam a patio door at home. After a worker posted a photo of the predicament, and a flurry of helpful…and unhelpful solutions flooded in, it was pointed out that employees had been simply working out of a different location. Eventually, an engineer managed to knock the umbrella out of the way – by extending wire through a hole drilled in the ceiling. (Has no one heard of a locksmith?)
➢ A pigeon had it’s own opinion of a lawmaker’s ideas to address a messy situation at a Chicago Transit Authority stop known by some as “pigeon poop station.” The bird did some business on the head of Democratic state Rep. Jaime Andrade while he was discussing the problem with a TV reporter on-camera outside of the Irving Park Blue Line station. During the interview, Andrade rubbed the top of his head and said, “I think they just got me.” They did.
(Not only was he struck by the irony…!)
-HuffPost, AP, CBC, Yahoo
DID YOU KNOW?
Despite the claims, celery isn’t a ‘negative calorie’ food: a large stick contains 10 calories, but it only takes 2 calories to digest it.
-QI
BS CHRONOMETER 09.20.19
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1934 [85] Sophia Loren (Scicolone), Rome Italy, movie star (1962 Academy Award- “Two Women”, 1991 Honorary Career Achievement Oscar)
1948 [71] George RR Martin, Bayonne NJ, novelist/TV writer and producer (“Game of Thrones”, which is based on his series of books, “A Song of Ice and Fire”)/four Primetime Emmy nominations
1951 [68] Guy Lafleur, Thurso, QC, retired NHL star (Montreal Canadiens, NY Rangers, Quebec Nordiques)/5-time Stanley Cup winner/3-time scoring champ/Hall of Fame 1988/Officer of the Order of Canada
1968 [51] Ben Shepherd, Okinawa, Japan, rock bassist (Soundgarden-‘Spoonman’, ‘Black Hole Sun’)
1976 [43] Jon Bernthal, Washington DC, TV actor (“The Walking Dead” 2010-18, “The Punisher” 2017-19)
1990 [29] Phillip Phillips, Albany GA, pop singer (‘Home’, ‘Gone, Gone, Gone’, Season 11 winner of “American Idol”)
SATURDAY- Stephen King (“The Shining”) is 72; Bill Murray (“Groundhog Day”) is 69; filmmaker Ethan Coen is 62; Faith Hill (‘This Kiss’) is 52; Tyler Stewart (Barenaked Ladies) is 52; Ricki Lake (“The Ricki Lake Show”) is 51; Luke Wilson (“Old School”) is 48; Alfonso Ribeiro (“The Fresh Prince of Bel Air”) is 48; Liam Gallagher (Oasis) is 47
SUNDAY- Opera singer Andrea Bocelli is 61; Joan Jett (‘I Love Rock ‘n Roll’) is 61; Scott Baio (“Happy Days”) is 59; Bonnie Hunt (“Cheaper by the Dozen”) is 58; Tom Felton (“Harry Potter”) is 32
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Gibberish Day”, highlighting the uselessness of the convoluted terminology and gobbledy-gook spouted by those who are masking their lack of knowledge and expertise or who are just too spineless to make a clear statement. Try this ‘Gibberish Generator’ …
NET: http://www.andrewdavidson.com/gibberish/
• “Punch Day”, the word ‘punch’ is said to come from the Hindustani word ‘panch’, which means ‘five’. In the early 1600s, sailors and employees of the British East India Company brought a new exotic drink from India to England. The beverage was made with five ingredients—spirits, lemon, sugar, water, and tea.
• “Cheese String Day”, perhaps the most enjoyable part of String Cheese is deciding how to eat it. Most people go for the classic “peel down and chow down” method—separating each stick into thin strands. (Or just chomp off a chunk, as if it were regular cheese…)
• “Pepperoni Pizza Day”, a day to celebrate America’s favorite variety of pizza. Here is some interesting trivia on the ever-popular pizza:
⇒ Pepperoni is the most popular, preferred by 36% of people (and 100% of children at a birthday party).
⇒ Over 3 Billion pizzas are sold in the U.S. each year.
⇒ More pizzas are sold on Super Bowl Sunday than any other day of the year.
⇒ Halloween is the second most popular day for eating pizza.
⇒ Over 17% of restaurants are pizzerias, or serve pizza.
⇒ The first pizza was sold in Naples Italy in 1738.
⇒ Pizzas most likely evolved as a variation of flatbreads.
⇒ Americans consume over 23 pounds of pizza per person per year.
SATURDAY-
• “Miniature Golf Day”. The first mini-golf was the ‘Tom Thumb Golf Course’ built in 1929 in Chattanooga TN by John Garnet Carter. Nowadays there’s a ‘Professional Miniature Golf Association’ that holds the ‘PMGA Championship’ each year.
• “Pecan Cookie Day”, whether you prefer butter pecan, caramel pecan, orange pecan, or maple pecan cookies, enjoy a delicious treat today in honor of National Pecan Cookie Day! (One of each, please!)
• “Pause the World Day”, sirens, television, computers, smartphones, car stereos, endless talking — Most of us accept this daily racket as normal. We rarely experience true silence, but silence can help you to get in touch with your emotions, provide you with a sense of calm, and leave you feeling rejuvenated (or just make you notice that ringing in your ears….)
• “World Alzheimer’s Day”, an annual observance to raise awareness about Alzheimer’s disease and dementia.
• “World Gratitude Day”, designed to ‘unite all people in a positive emotion of gratitude, creating a world community’. (Brought to you by the ‘Association of the Hopelessly Overly-Optimistic’.)
SUNDAY-
• “Last Full Day of Summer” in the Northern Hemisphere, as Autumn officially arrives tomorrow. (sniff!)
• “Business Women’s Day”, celebrating the important contribution of working women and women business owners.
• “Dear Diary Day”, a day to ‘put it on paper because it’ll make you feel better’. (Until someone sneaky finds your diary and Instagrams all your deepest, darkest secrets.)
• “Centenarians Day”, honoring those who’ve lived 100 years or more (you’d best hurry up and honor them!)
• “Hobbit Day”, celebrating author JRR Tolkien and the birthdays of his characters ‘Frodo’ and ‘Bilbo Baggins’.
• “White Chocolate Day”, honoring the tasty confection of sugar, cocoa butter, and milk solids. It first appeared in Switzerland in the 1930s when Nestlé invented it to use up excess cocoa butter. To qualify as real ‘white chocolate’, it must be at least 20% cocoa butter by weight.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1946 [73] ‘Cannes Film Festival’ debuts on the French Riviera (world’s top-ranked)
Proper pronunciation: a hybrid of ‘ken’ and ‘can’: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-EXh4Axj3k
2006 [13] A memorial for late ‘Crocodile Hunter’ Steve Irwin is held at the Australia Zoo in Brisbane (3,000 tickets are snapped up in 15 minutes)
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2004 [15] In an interview with ‘The Sun’ tabloid, Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones claims to have finally given up illegal drugs, in part because “the quality’s gone down” (In a 2015 interview, however, he says he is still partial to beginning his day by smoking a joint)
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1921 [98] 1st ‘Radio Newscast’ airs, on KDKA Pittsburgh PA
1998 [21] Doctors in Lyon, France sew a donor’s hand & arm on a man whose own arm had been amputated in an accident 14 years earlier (afterward, the patient applauds … because he can)
2011 [08] USA ends its ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy, allowing gay men & women to serve in the military openly for the first time
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1998 [21] After playing in a Major League Baseball-record 2,632 consecutive games over 16 seasons, Cal Ripken Jr. of the Baltimore Orioles finally sits out a game vs NY Yankees
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ The volume of the Earth’s moon is the same as the volume of the Pacific Ocean.
✓ The Earth gets 100 tons heavier every day due to falling meteoric dust.
✓ Electric cars were introduced in 1896 and by the end of the century almost 50% of motorcars worldwide were electric.
✓ A car traveling 100 mph (160 km/h) would take more than 29 million years to reach the nearest star.
✓ Cats do not have a collarbone, so they can fit through any opening the size of their head.
✓ A cats has 3 eyelids, but most cats do not have eyelashes.
-DidYouKnow
BS UNNECESSARY IPHONE FEATURES:
• A new version every three months or whatever.
• Voicemail. Like I’m ever gonna check that.
• The $1,000 price tag
• “Screen time”. I already know I’m on my phone all day!
• Airbag
• Swiss Army Knife
• Blockbuster locator app
• Mansplaining app
• The user
• According to Apple, the headphone jack.
-Twitter
Best of BS . . .
BS BAD THINGS FOR A DOCTOR TO SAY:
• “The surgery was a success, but the patient died.”
• “Check your bowel movements for the next few days. I’ve lost my ring.”
• “You have six months to live. But not in a row.”
• “Cash up front.”
• “Hang on. Let me Google this.”
• “Turn your head and cough. But first, put on these stockings and high heels.”
• “I have bad news and worse news. The bad news is you have 24 hours to live. The worse news is I forgot to call you yesterday.”
• “Holy crap. What IS that?”
• “Just put your clothes over there. Next to mine.”
• “The good news is that there is going to be a disease named after you.”
• “Are you the widow-to-be?”
• “Bend over.”
-Twitter, first published in ‘BS’ in 2018
BS RANDOM JOKE:
If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, it means nobody else liked them. Set them free again.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What totally frivolous thing would you like to buy?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: The average Millennial spends 3 hours a day doing THIS. What is it?
Answer: Wearing headphones
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.