The Bull Sheet

September 26 2024

Thursday, September 26, 2024 – Edition: #7801

Sheet Happens!

 

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ If you have young kids, you’ll want to lunge for the parental controls. “Deadpool & Wolverine” is f-bombing its way to streaming following its enormous success at the box office this summer. The R-rated Marvel sequel, starring Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman, will be available for rent and purchase on digital platforms, such as Prime Video and Apple TV+, on Oct. 1. It will release on 4K Blu-ray/DVD on Oct. 22. Both will feature dozens of bonus featurettes, including “Finding Madonna: Making the Oner,” in which director Shawn Levy and Reynolds break down the historic scene; “Loose Ends: The Legacy Heroes,” which sees the cast and crew go through the film’s many mind-blowing cameos; and, of course, a gag reel. The 4K UHD Blu-ray will include exclusive custom art, and 2 SteelBook versions to choose – one spotlighting ‘Deadpool’ and the other ‘Wolverine’.
-Variety
★ Kevin Costner may someday be back in the saddle on “Yellowstone.” In a new interview with ET, the Oscar winner said that making the show was “a wonderful part” of his life, “And who knows, some things have a way of circling back.” He continued, saying: “I’ve always been open to what I started. Five seasons was a lot for us to do, and I think that story is not finished.” Costner suggested it “can go on” because his character, ‘John Dutton’, has children, so the story could become about them. Costner exited the series amid a rumored feud with showrunner Taylor Sheridan. The announced final season of Yellowstone premieres Nov. 10.
-NYPost
★ As beleaguered music mogul Sean “Diddy” Combs sits in jail awaiting trial on federal sex crime charges, he and his former bodyguard are facing new sexual assault allegations in a new lawsuit. In a demand for jury trial filed Tuesday in New York, a woman named Thalia Graves alleges that Combs and his head of security at the time, Joseph Sherman, raped her in the summer of 2001 at the Bad Boy Records studio in New York City. Graves alleges the sexual assault was recorded on video and that she has had suicidal thoughts ever since. Her attorney said that Graves will be seeking damages in an amount “to be determined at trial.”
-People
★ Ryan Murphy is defending his work on “Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story”, responding to Erik Menendez’s criticism of the series, which he called a “dishonest portrayal.” Murphy told E! News: “That’s interesting because I know he hasn’t watched the show.” Murphy said that he hopes Menendez does watch it, and if he did, “He would be incredibly proud of Cooper Koch, who plays him.” According to Murphy, the miniseries shows “many, many, many perspectives”, and the intention is to “present…all the facts and have you…make up your own mind about who’s innocent, who’s guilty, and who’s the monster.”
-Deadline
★ ‘Darth Vader’ actor James Earl Jones, who died earlier this month following a stellar stage and screen career, will be honored tonight with a Broadway theatre light-dimming. In addition to his legendary roles in movies like “Star Wars” and “The Lion King”, Jones racked up an impressive list of stage performances throughout his 70-year career. House lights will be turned down tonight at 6:45pm, as part of Broadway’s tradition of honouring late theatre icons.
-ContactMusic

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” (ABC/Global): Earvin “Magic” Johnson, Joshua Jackson, Myles Smith
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Cate Blanchett, Marcello Hernández, Nick Griffin
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Sarah Silverman, Chris Stapleton
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Raanan Hershberg, Sarah Tiana, Orlando Leyba
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Aubrey Plaza, Chloe Fineman
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Ekin-Su Cülcüloğlu, Tamra Judge
• “The Daily Show” (COM): Susanna Fogel, host Desi Lydic
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Wanda Sykes, Martin Sheen, Melissa Fitzgerald and Mary McCormack
• “The Talk” (CBS): Peri Gilpin; Deon Cole guest co-hosts
• “Live With Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Niecy Nash-Betts, Dr. Jeanine Downie
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Keith Urban, Cristin Milioti
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Shailene Woodley
• “The Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Flavor Flav
• “People’s Choice Country Awards” (NBC): Shania Twain hosts from the Grand Ole Opry House. Miranda Lambert and Kane Brown receive the Country Icon Award, and perform. Other performers include: Keith Urban, Kelsea Ballerini, Lady A, Parker McCollum, The War & Treaty, and Brad Paisley.
• “Doctor Odyssey” (ABC): Series premiere. The Odyssey’s new onboard doctor, Max Bankman gets acquainted with Capt. Massey and his medical team, while treating crises miles from shore.
• “9-1-1” (ABC): Season 8 premiere. A trailer with millions of bees crashes in LA, unleashing a swarm.
• “Grey’s Anatomy” (ABC): Season 21 premiere. Catherine continues to interfere with Meredith and Amelia’s research; accidents at a climate change protest bring unique cases to the hospital.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Sabrina Carpenter – Joined Christina Aguilera to sing ‘What a Girl Wants’ at a 25th anniversary live celebration of Aguilera’s self-titled debut album, at the Spotify Music Studios in LA. They performed a (mostly) quieter, slower rendition of the tune, which was originally released in 1999, the year Carpenter was born. LINK (starts at 19:25): https://tinyurl.com/yrk9s3nu
• Lady Gaga — has announced a brand-new album. Out tomorrow, “Harlequin” serves as a companion project to the upcoming film “Joker: Folie à Deux”, in which Gaga co-stars as ‘Harley Quinn’. She posted a pic of the album cover and its track list to Instagram. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2st27pa2
• Mary J. Blige – has announced she’s hitting the road next year, and will drop her 15th studio album, “Gratitude” on Nov. 15. The “For My Fans Tour” will include support acts Ne-Yo and Mario, and will begin in January. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/ytsf2y8b
• Linkin Park – has dropped the new single ‘Heavy Is the Crown’, and its music video. The tune serves as the 2024 League of Legends World Championship anthem, the band’s first collab with Riot Games. It will also appear on the band’s first album since 2017, “From Zero”, out Nov. 15. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mr3n7kxm
• Coldplay — Chris Martin showed up dressed like a tacky tourist at Las Vegas dive bar Dino’s over the weekend. He wore a baggy business suit, striped tie, coke-bottle glasses and red wig, and held a red balloon as he did his surprise karaoke schtick while filming the video for the group’s new single ‘All My Love’. Coldplay’s album “Moon Music” drops Oct. 4. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/36s2x4hn
• Bruce Springsteen – The trailer for the upcoming documentary “Road Diary: Bruce Springsteen and The E Street Band” has been released. It includes clips of the group on its 2023-24 tour, backstage and in interviews. The film debuts on Hulu and Disney+ on October 25. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3azv26r4
• Miranda Lambert – In a recent interview, she was asked which artists are on her Mount Rushmore of country music. Her first response was: “Oh god! That’s too hard. It really is too hard.” But after a moment to think, she rattled off: “Emmylou (Harris), George Strait, Merle Haggard and Willie (Nelson).” She followed that with the comment: “I never did get to, like, smoke weed with Willie…I mean, I would.”
• Shaboozey – ‘A Bar Song (Tipsy)’ has now ruled Billboard’s Hot Country Songs chart for 15 weeks, becoming just the 15th song to accomplish that feat since the chart was introduced in 1958. The song is also still at the top of the all-genre Hot 100.
• Jelly Roll – His wife, social media personality Bunnie Xo, posted a teaser clip of a new song that he wrote for her. The TikTok vid features Jelly singing to a montage of videos documenting their love story. Sample lyric: “Woman, without you on my lips/I’d just be a man doing things I know I should quit.” Expect the tune to appear on his new album “Beautifully Broken”, out next month. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/cuftp4sp

SHOOTING THE BULL

HIGH VOICE = HIGH RISK:
Men will do some crazy things to try to impress a woman. Think of all those elaborate marriage proposals, and dangerous TikTok challenges…and that time I chased a mouse out of my sister’s friend’s apartment (and I’m PETRIFIED of any kind of vermin!) — but enough about that. Well, it turns out it’s a woman’s voice that determines how far he’ll go. And while earlier studies have shown that men seem to have a preference for women with a bubbly high-register, new research published in Personality and Individual Differences found that men are more willing to be lured into danger for women with a high-pitched voice — but only if she’s into that. In other words, when women seem disinterested in risk-taking behavior, men tend to play it safe.
(It’s funny: Any woman I’ve ever had anything to do with has encouraged me to take part in dangerous activities…Hey, wait a minute…!)
(It all depends on what you mean by “risky behavior”. For instance, sometimes when my wife is outside sunning herself, I do the dusting BEFORE I vacuum. If she only knew!)
-NYPost

GETCHER TAMOGOTCHI:
I never thought I’d see the day, but Tamagotchis are cool again. Gen Z has revived the pocket-sized plaything that Millennials will fondly remember. In case you don’t know, Tamagotchis are “virtual pets” — digital devices that need to be “cared for” by the owner. They were huge in the 1990s, and have once again become popular among the younger generation. And with the Tamagotchi trend growing, some new fans are even carrying the keychain knick-knack to their purses as a fun accessory. By the way, the $20 toy has been updated since its launch almost 3 decades ago, allowing users to connect with friends, play on Wi-Fi, and download different items. But that hasn’t stopped some older Tamagotchi devotees from boasting about their original-generation models on social media. One said in a video: “With how the world is at the moment…it’s nice to just look down at your little pixel pet every now and again, forget it all for a moment to feed it a little snack or play a little game, and remember a much simpler time.”
(Great! When is Pokémon coming back — again?)
(In fact, Tamagotchis are SO cool now, that [***Afternoon Guy***] isn’t even allowed to own one!)
-NYPost

NOW, IT’S PERSONNEL:
Today is “Human Resource Professionals Day”, and perhaps as a way of recognizing these understanding souls, 1,000 of them were polled, asking them what are the top job frustrations expressed to them by corporate workers today. And as you may have guessed, money is at the top of the list. The survey, carried out in the US, found that 29% said that feeling underpaid is the most common source of discontent for workers at their company, followed by being unappreciated (26%), poor work-life balance (25%), and dissatisfaction with benefits (23%). And what are the most-common issues that are brought to the HR department? Poor communication came in first, followed by rule violations, toxic negativity, and gossip. On the lighter side, some of the unconventional issues that HR workers said they had been tasked with dealing with included:
• “Preventing strange rituals” in a colleague’s office
• Several cases where employees brought pets such as snakes or large reptiles to the office
• Dealing with an interviewee’s enraged mother
• Reports of haunted workplaces, leading to requests for office exorcisms
(What that person DIDN’T know is that the boss’s office ALWAYS smells like that!)
(Yeah, you wouldn’t call those things “on the lighter side” if you were the poor HR schmo who had to deal with them!)
-SWNS

THE GREATEST ACTORS IN HISTORY, ACCORDING TO STATS:
Using a statistical analysis taking into account the factors of online ratings, box office success, and Oscar recognition, the website “StatSignificant” has determined the greatest actors of all-time. Here they are…
1. Leonardo DiCaprio (ranked #2 online, #5 at box office, and #30 in Oscar recognition)
2. Paul Newman
3. Al Pacino
4. Jack Nicholson
5. Brad Pitt
6. Tom Hanks
7. Jack Lemmon
8. Denzel Washington
9. Dustin Hoffman
10. Christian Bale
(By the way, because I know you’re wondering, the top woman is Audrey Hepburn, ranked #11…)
[***Tomorrow: the WORST actors of all-time…!***]
-StatSignificant

THE BEST SONGS OF THE 2000s:
Dust off your iPod Nano, because here come the top songs of the years 2000-10, according to a poll of fans and “experts” . . .
1. ‘Hey Ya!’ – OutKast (2003)
2. ‘Paper Planes’ – M.I.A. (2007)
3. ‘Crazy in Love’ — Beyoncé ft. Jay-Z (2003)
4. ‘Lose Yourself’ — Eminem (2002)
5. ‘Toxic’ – Britney Spears (2003)
(What would you add to the list?)
-StudyFinds

DID YOU KNOW?
Attention, Kmart shoppers: The once-legendary retail chain is set to close its last full-size US store, a location in Bridgehampton, NY, on Oct. 20. That’ll leave a smaller store in Miami and outposts in Guam and the US Virgin Islands. When Kmart bought up Sears in an $11 billion dollar merger in 2005, it boasted around 1,400 locations, while Sears had almost 900. But with competition from stores like Walmart and Target, and digital sellers like Amazon, the company filed for bankruptcy in 2018, emerging with just 425 Kmart and Sears stores, and that number that has steadily dwindled ever since. (If you hurry, you may be able to take advantage of a “Blue-light special” – on blue lights!)
-MorningBrew

BS CHRONOMETER 09.26.24 

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Better Breakfast Day”, to remind us that eating a healthy breakfast can get you and your family on track to making healthier choices throughout the day, and help curb overeating at other meals. (I’m such a big proponent of eating a good breakfast that I usually have 2!)
• “National Pancake Day”, serve with a variety of syrups, jams, chocolate sauce or even Nutella. Slice fresh fruit and serve on the side. Make Cinnamon Butter by whipping unsalted butter with cinnamon and serving over pancakes. (Not to be confused with “Pancake Tuesday” in February…)
• “Lumberjack Day”, honoring a tough job that’s become a popular sport … logging games. (Also known as “Eat Like a Lumberjack Day”… and you know what lumberjacks LOVE to eat? Pancakes!)
• “Human Resource Professionals Day”. They aren’t often given credit for their work, but this day honors HR people, and encourages us to learn more about human resource jobs and their importance. (Yesterday I told a joke on-air that was so funny, our HR person asked me to drop by and tell it again!) [***See “Now, It’s Personnel”, above***]
• “Remember Me Thursday”, to shine a light on all orphan pets that are in shelters and rescues, waiting for forever homes. Check with your local facility to see if one is right for you!
• “World Contraception Day”, to raise awareness about contraception and safe sex. Odd contraceptives used throughout history have included: crocodile dung, animal intestines, blacksmith water, lemon diaphragms, and – ew…brewed tea with beaver testicles (also, morning breath!).
• “Johnny Appleseed Day”, celebrated on the anniversary of his birth. He was born John Chapman in Massachusetts in 1774, and introduced apples to many orchards in the wilderness of the American Midwest. He then gave or sold trees to pioneers.
• “The Last of Us Day”, celebrating the video game that became a hit show. It was first released on Playstation 3 in 2013. In the game, Sept. 26 is the date that the outbreak—the Cordyceps brain infection—reaches its crisis point. (Season 2 of the show is expected in early 2025…)
• “World Maritime Day”. The theme for 2024 is “Navigating the Future: Safety First!” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/ycn652yw
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Fri] Love Note Day
[Fri] Chocolate Milk Day
[Sat] Good Neighbor Day
[Sun] Broadway Musicals Day
This Week is…Wild Rice Week
This Month is…Read a New Book Month

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1945 [79] Bryan Ferry, Washington England, pop-new wave singer-songwriter (‘Slave to Love’, Roxy Music-‘Love is the Drug’, ‘Avalon’)

1955 [69] Carlene Carter (Rebecca Carlene Smith), Gallatin TN, country singer-songwriter (‘Every Little Thing’, ‘I Fell in Love’)/daughter of June Carter Cash

1956 [68] Linda Hamilton, Salisbury MD, movie actress (‘Sarah Connor” in “Terminator” franchise)/TV actress (“Resident Alien” since 2021)/COMING UP… “Stranger Things” Season 5, 2025

1968 [56] Jim Caviezel, Mount Vernon WA, TV actor (“Person of Interest” 2011-16)/movie actor (“The Count of Monte Cristo”, “The Passion of the Christ”)

1972 [52] Shawn Stockman, Philadelphia PA, R&B singer (Boyz II Men-‘I’ll Make Love to You’, ‘The End Of the Road’)

1981 [43] Serena Williams, Saginaw MI, former pro tennis player (23 Grand Slam singles titles)/ranked #1 for 319 weeks, including a joint-record 186 consecutive/highest-earning female athlete of all time ($95million)/sister of Venus Williams

1981 [43] Christina Milian (Flores), Jersey City NJ, pop singer (‘AM to PM’, ‘Dip It Low’)/movie actress (“Be Cool”, “American Pie”)

1984 [40] Nev Schulman, New York City NY, TV host-producer (“Catfish: The TV Show” since 2012)/documentary filmmaker (“Catfish”)

1988 [36] Lilly Singh, Scarborough ON, YouTube vlogger (known as “Superwoman”, she was ranked 3rd in Forbes’ 2016 list of highest-earning YouTubers – $10.5million)/TV personality (“A Little Late with Lilly Singh” 2019-21, “Canada’s Got Talent” judge 2022-24)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1964 [60] “Gilligan’s Island”, starring Bob Denver as ‘Gilligan’, debuts on CBS.

2008 [16] Screen legend Paul Newman dies from cancer at age 83 at his home in Westport CT.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1975 [49] “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” opens. Featuring a young Meat Loaf, along with Tim Curry and Susan Sarandon, the movie tanks, but later becomes a cult classic, with audience members shouting back at the screen and bringing toast, toilet paper, and other items to enhance the viewing experience.

2003 [21] Robert Palmer dies from a heart attack at age 54 in Paris.

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2017 [07] Saudi Arabia announces it is overturning its ban on women driving – the last country in the world to do so. Women began driving legally June 24, 2018.

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1926 [98] The shortest MLB double-header ever is played, as NY Yankees lose 6-1 in 72 minutes — then lose again 6-2 in 55 minutes, to St Louis Browns (Yanks had already clinched the pennant).

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ If you started with 1 cent and doubled your money every day, it would take 27 days to become a millionaire.
✓ Humans share 50% of their DNA with bananas.
✓ In 30 minutes, the human body gives off enough heat to bring a gallon of water to a boil.
✓ It takes longer to say “www” than it does to say “World Wide Web” because of all the syllables.
✓ Jupiter and Saturn have diamond rain.
✓ Female dragonflies will fake their own deaths to avoid mating with unwanted males.
-BestLife, AllThatIsInteresting

Best of BS:
BS SIGNS THAT FALL HAS ARRIVED:

• Flannel clothing is popping up everywhere. Even in church.
• You’ve just taken a selfie in a pumpkin patch.
• Food stores contain sufficient wheat, oats, and cured meats to see your entire town through the next 3 winters.
• A temporary Halloween shop has moved into every vacant strip mall store.
• Finally! New episodes of your 16 favorite reality TV shows.
• You have lost one of your children for at least 30 minutes in your local corn maze.
• You put away your entire summer wardrobe, only to be immediately hit by a major heatwave.
• You experience an overwhelming compulsion to go apple-picking.
• Pumpkin-spice. Everyfreakingwhere.
-McSweeney’s, first published in BS in 2017

WORLD’S THINNEST BS BOOKS:
• “Bill Gates: The Wild Years”
• “The Definitive Guide to the Most Popular Lawyers”
• “A Guide to the Fine Wines of Saskatchewan”
• “The Hansard Report on Parliamentary Accomplishments on Fridays”
• “Career Opportunities for Philosophy Majors”
• “Things I Would Not Do For Money” by Snoop Dogg
• “The Great Cars of Russia”
• “Famous Jazz Bagpipers”
• “Everything Men Know About Women”
• “Stuff I Can’t Afford” by Mark Zuckerberg
• “Different Ways to Spell Bob”
• (***Caution***) “The Book of Virtues” by Donald Trump
-First published in BS in 2000

BS WEB GOODIE:
Inspirational words: https://tinyurl.com/2fmycjyv

BS RANDOM JOKE:
“Be yourself” is just about the worst advice you can give to some people…

BS PHONE STARTER:
If you could spend one month in any past time period — and were guaranteed not to suffer any harm or change the course of history — when would it be?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
24% of us say they feel guilty if they don’t do THIS every day. What is it?
Answer:  Make the bed

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.

 

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